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Creepy comment of the day: If men can't get "the steady love and wild sex of a valuable young girl," naturally they'll start shooting people.

Banana slug: A better role model for horny humans than bonobos?
Banana slug: A better role model for horny humans than bonobos?

Sometimes I hunt the misogyny, sometimes it wanders up right up to me and says hello.

Today’s post is an example of the latter. Below, a slightly edited comment that someone left for me this morning. It’s a response to a post of mine about a dreadful post on Return of Kings in which a fellow calling himself Billy Chubbs argued, with absolutely no evidence, that a recent high school shooter was driven to murder because of his “probable sexual frustration,” Chubbs went on to argue that young women are “selfish” because they don’t have sex with guys they’re not attracted to.

Anyway, my new commenter – posting under the name “whogoesthere?” – thinks that I and the other commenters here were being too hard on Chubbs’ “very good argument.” And so he deposited this giant rant, which in many ways is even scarier than Chubbs’ original.

He’s a tad verbose, so I’ve trimmed out some stuff that isn’t relevant to his general, er, thesis. And I’ve also taken the liberty of adding a few paragraph breaks and bolding a few of the best (i.e. worst) bits.

When men don’t get the women they want they turn to violence.

Not a good start here, because this just isn’t true. In this case, the phrase “not all men” is, for once, appropriate. Most men don’t get violent when they’re turned down.

This is established all over the animal kingdom and offers a good example about how it applies to humans, that snotty girls who keep their sexual treasures to all but a few males cause the remaining males to snap. …

Animals do all sorts of things that humans don’t do, and we can’t always learn from their behavior or assume that it relates to our own lives.

Or maybe the Evo Psych crew is just looking at the wrong animals. When banana slugs can’t find a partner to have sex with, they simply fertilize themselves. There’s a lesson here, I think, for the angry incels of the world: you can’t always get what you want, and when you can’t, sex with yourself is better than murder.

High school is a massively sexually charged winner take all environment. … Today’s high school is basically an ongoing audition for a porno video and the guys and girls who don’t make the cut can only sit at home and masturbate.

wat

It’s demeaning and hits a major blow to a person’s sexual identity to not be invited to frolic with the beautiful people.

Somehow most people, regardless of gender, manage to survive even if they’re not frolicking with Charlize Theron and/or Channing Tatum.

I’m sorry but almost no men go on wild shooting rampages if they have a beautiful female in their keep.

In their keep?! Also, no. Charles Manson was surrounded by beautiful young women. Yet he orchestrated multiple grisly murders.

The only guys that do so are bank robbers and thieves, generally guys at a later stage of life more fixated on money.

wat

Human beings naturally assess the amount of sex going around them and judge themselves in relationship to the amount and type of sex others are getting.

You know, you can’t actually tell how much and what kind of sex someone is having just by looking at them. Yes, there will always be people in the world having more sex with you. And some of these people are having sex with people you would probably like to have sex with. There are also people who are smarter than you, funnier than you, who can play chess or kickbox better than you, who have hundreds or thousands of times more money than you do.

That’s life. Life isn’t fair.

This makes sense because from a reproductive standpoint sex is coveted, and sex with beautiful thin, young women are the most coveted. Being the first to spoil these young women sexually is viewed reproductively as a guarantee of parentage, thus this is why males instinctively covet and burn with passion for these females.

Ah, yes, it was only a matter of time until the creepy pedo-justifying Evo Psych assfacts made their appearance. Not all men “burn with passion” in their pants for virginal high school girls.

This is why we have “morality” which is in its essence is a promise not to flaunt or indulge in sex moreso than the lowest man or woman in your tribe. This is what is meant when people say “morality went out the window.” They mean someone with more sexual prowess is openly indulging in sex and broadcasting it to stimulate the jealousy of the underclasses.

I’m pretty sure that’s not what people mean when they say “morality went out the window.”

This teen killed people cause he thought that beautiful girls were out of reach. The high school environment merely rubbed it in his face. Yes drugs to treat ADD might’ve eroded many of the impulse control functions in the teen, but the rage against the high school was still the gasoline.

[citation needed]

He might’ve had a picture or two taken with a girl next to him, but oftentimes those high school girls lie and simply eat up the male’s offerings without granting sexual access, but grant it to a random stud.

How dare young women choose who to have sex with, and who not to!

I’m not saying the girl he killed deserved it, it’s only that when you are in that frame of mind you cannot tell who is having more sex than others and you simply fill in the gaps with rage.

Wait, so if she had turned him down he would have been justified in killing her?

The beautiful girl simply represented everything that the teen couldn’t get. The steady love and wild sex of a valuable young girl.

Yeah, I think you’re confusing high school with porn again. His rampage lasted roughly a minute and a half. He shot her because she was there.

All the other theories posted on this site seem comical, self-righteous and weirdly off-point. It’s like you’re assessing the situation as an asexual senior citizen or righteous prude.

Not a lot of “prudes” here. Just people who find the “women need to have sex with ‘nice guys’ or these ‘nice gys’ will kill you all” to be a somewhat problematic argument.

Generally men want sex with young thin beauties who validate their existence.

Some men do. But most men, among those who are sexually attracted to women, aren’t as neurotically fixated on this small slice of the female demographic – women in their teens and early twenties who are somehow both virginal and sexually “wild” – as manosphere men seem to be. And most people don’t base their entire  self-worth on whether or not they’re having sex with beautiful people.

Some men prefer women older than them. Some like women who are fat. Plenty of men don’t fixate on a particular physical type and are attracted to all sorts of different women. Believe it or not, whogoesthere, there are lots of men who are more interested in what’s in a woman’s head than they are in whether or not she matches up with some particular checklist of physical attributes.

If society removes all of the social pathways to attaining such a beauty, such as making prostitution illegal, increasing shame for men who seek sex, rewarding females and males called manginas who identify and mock the sex seekers and so on… this will lead to depression in men and all of the behaviors surrounding it, including shootings. Sounds pretty much like a logical line of reasoning to me.

And that’s the problem. It’s not actually a logical line of reasoning at all. It’s more like a sort of blackmail.

Men don’t kill women because they can’t have “the steady love and wild sex of a valuable young girl.” Sometimes men kill women because they feel entitled to have sex with these “valuable young girls” and become bitter and enraged when they can’t find a “valuable young girl” who agrees with them on this particular point.

It’s not the lack of “sexual access” that’s the problem. It’s the notion that your desire for “sexual access” means more than the right of that person to say “no.” It’s the notion that society has done you wrong because you can’t (at least at the moment) get laid. It’s the idea that your desire to have sex with a particular kind of woman somehow trumps the right of other people to live.

I mean, what the fucking fuck.

Oh, by the way, there’s no evidence that the shooter in question – Karl Halverson Pierson – was motivated by sexual frustration. His intended target was the school librarian, who is also the school’s debate coach. Pierson was obsessed with debate, and had some sort of grudge against the coach.

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weirwoodtreehugger
10 years ago

I should point out that technically you can’t have a fetish for a person. A fetish refers to an inanimate object. You can a shoe fetish or a diaper fetish but being attracted to fat people, skinny people or older people or younger people or whoever else is absolutely not a fetish. It’s just an attraction.

Fnoicby
Fnoicby
10 years ago

@piratejennie, what a sweet story. I feel a little bad for people who seem to be incapable of having beautiful experiences like this, because they’ve reduced everything to some sort of weird “hotness” competition.

undfreeland
undfreeland
10 years ago

The notion that a man would want a beautiful woman only for showing her off is so absurd. And I’m the one peddling in stereotypes?

The best month of my life was when I was with an extremely beautiful woman who adored me. Despite her exquisite proportions and adorable face, she was quite reclusive due to a heavy work load getting her phD in biology and a generally stange demeanor. We rarely hung out outside of her apartment. I don’t think any of my male friends ever even met her. I didn’t need the validation of others to find her presence and her attention intoxicating.

It stood on sharp contrast to a previous relationship to an average to below average women who ended up leaving me for a taller, better looking guy with killer aloof game who I’d previously thought was a good friend of mine. Despite the previous woman being far more engaging and us having much more in common and dating for two years, I never experienced the level of bliss with her as i did with that PhD student.

Being with a truly beautiful woman is great. Not for social validation. It’s great because every time you look at them, you’re blown away. It’s because sex with someone who can turn you on fully clothed, just being there, is unbelievable.

sparky
sparky
10 years ago

Isn’t it interesting how undfreeland can just dismiss the fact that many, many people who aren’t “beautiful people” manage to have fun and rewarding sex/relationships.

undfreeland, dude, really didn’t need that update from your boner. And you do know that what you, personally, find attractive is not a universal, right? And what the fuck is your point, anymore? You’re just whining at this point.

racnad: You’ve yet to prove that men who are douchebag assholes have more sex than men who aren’t douchebag assholes. A single mugshot that people liked on Facebook? That’s not proof.

Notice racnad didn’t respond to anyone who called him out on his Nice Guy ™ assholery.

bunnybunny
10 years ago

Attractive people are great. But your obsession with conventionally beautiful women is fucking pathetic and dehumanizing, and you don’t care because you’re a selfish prick. The best part is that the joke is on you: you’re miserable if the best month of your life was with a woman who didn’t engage you or have anything in common with you.

katz
10 years ago

Here, Undfreeland, have some sympathy.

fromafar2013
fromafar2013
10 years ago

It’s because sex with someone who can turn you on fully clothed, just being there, is unbelievable.

Which is fair enough, when you realize that what turns people on varies from person to person and does not always include physical traits. But that wasn’t your point, was it?

Viscaria
Viscaria
10 years ago

I dream of the man who will tell strangers of my exquisite proportions! When boyfriend gets home I’m going to tell him to ready his tape measure and his twitter account.

piratejennie
10 years ago

@Fnoicby

Thanks 🙂 I remember that day more vividly than when we were introduced.

And seconding sparky. No one wants to hear about your bliss, undfreeland.

And your anecdotes are starting to show some holes as your arguments get weaker and more repetitive.

Read back through more thoroughly and want to offer a very happy anniversary to LBT and Mac. Hiking sounds like a lovely way to spend the day with your sweetie.

Flying Mouse
Flying Mouse
10 years ago

It stood on sharp contrast to a previous relationship to an average to below average women who ended up leaving me for a taller, better looking guy with killer aloof game who I’d previously thought was a good friend of mine. Despite the previous woman being far more engaging and us having much more in common and dating for two years, I never experienced the level of bliss with her as i did with that PhD student.

Note to self: must pencil in date to abandon short, sexy, funny, adoring husband for tall guy who acts like he hates me. That way I can free husband up for his true life’s happiness: a short-lived but passionate affair with a classic beauty with whom he has nothing in common and who will not be seen in with him in public. Will get double points for this action, as I will also be engaging in that fabled exercise, female hypergamy.

weirwoodtreehugger
10 years ago

Why is unfreedland still assuming that things that make his boner happy are the same things that make other boners happy?

I’m assuming the biology student dumped his sorry ass. Probably because he viewed her as a Barbie doll with a pulse.

I still have to see him acknowledge that women have worthwhile traits beyond physical appearance. That last comment just made my skin crawl.

Buttercup Q. Skullpants
Buttercup Q. Skullpants
10 years ago

an average to below average women who ended up leaving me for a taller, better looking guy

‘Average’. ‘Below average’. ‘Better looking’. Why are you so insistent about ranking and rating and comparing and assigning everyone to a PERMANENT IMMOVABLE SPOT ON THE ATTRACTIVENESS SPECTRUM?

She may not have been your cup of tea physically, but obviously the taller, better-looking guy did. So whose assessment prevails, here? See how it doesn’t make sense to rank people on some kind of immutable hotness scale?

with killer aloof game

Please stop talking like this. Seriously. She didn’t leave you because this guy had “game”. She left you because it was obvious all you wanted was to feed your addiction to eye candy, and she got bored with that.

I mean, everyone appreciates beauty (defined differently by everybody), but on the relationship pie chart, sexytimes constitute, what, maybe 5% of the day? 10%? It doesn’t make logical sense to obsess over that at the expense of the other 90-95% of the day, where you’re having to negotiate who takes out the trash and what movie to watch and which friends to see and who should remember to get more toothpaste and all the other mundanities that go into forging a life together. That’s the whole point of a relationship: relating. Not sitting around gawking at the other person because she haz a pretteh.

Although to be fair, I do sometimes do that to my cat.

Viscaria
Viscaria
10 years ago

I’m not sure if I feel worse for the woman he had some brief affair with who he didn’t care much about on a human level, or the ex-girlfriend that he considered an unsexy consolation prize.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

He’s still here? It’s funny how they always believe that if they just repeat the same creepy, misogynistic crap often enough it will blow our minds and win us over to the point of view.

I wonder if after observing the unfortunate victim’s “exquisite proportions” he asked to check her teeth. I mean, that’s what they do with horses, so why not?

In the unlikely event that undfreeland isn’t a lulz troll my money is on the cops someday finding a collection of exquisitely proportioned hacked off female body parts in his freezer.

undfreeland
undfreeland
10 years ago

Holes in my argument? I’m the one who just blew the lid of the your whole “men only want hot women to show them off bs.
I haven’t addressed the anecdotes about what women here find attractive in men because everything they have said fell well within the range of conventional attraction
Of course relationships grew out of personal compatibility, but initial physical attraction was there and was crucial. Of course specifics are varied. That doesn’t mean that most people can’t be quantified into a general range.

I mean, isn’t one of the complaints amongst ya’ll about Nice Guy dipsticks that they only want to sleep with very attractive women them despite not being attractive themselves? You can’t have it both ways. You can’t say that attraction is some vague totally personal thing and then denigrate that particular strain of social retard by saying they aren’t attractive enough. If ya’ll were correct, surely there would be some attractive woman who found them attractive.

As for those trying to refute my claims as if they rest on Evo Psych. Why? I’ve said evo pych is bullshit. Obviously there are some biological factors in attraction as evidenced by the gradually emerging understanding of sexual orientation being determined in the womb, but I have consistently asserted that it is culture and society that gives people the notions of what they find attractive.

Life is a bar fight. You pick up whatever you can use to win. If you’re terribly lonely, you’ll adjust to lower and different expectation for the attractiveness of a mate

I recently dumped a women who was far less attractive than me. I dated her because my current location renders me a sexual non-entity to the majority of women around me. She was enamored with me because I was better looking than her. She would even go on about how I was so good to her, despite the fact that, objectively, I was not. She was blinded by being with someone more attractive than her.

I mean, it’s like ya’ll are blind to the power of physical beauty despite countless tales, historical and fictional of men and women ruining their lives for the affection of an extremely physically attractive person. You act as if it is a thing which does not exist.

@weirdtreehugger- She went away for a research project and never contacted me again. I assume she was only with me because I was convenient to her for a short time. Demanding nothing from her, but providing company and sex while she hurried through some work she had to do.
Proving the truisim: An unattractive man (a notion which refers to more than just not having brad pit looks, for the reductionists amongst you) can fuck an attractive woman, but he can never truly date her.

YoullNeverGuess
YoullNeverGuess
10 years ago

Actually, I think und is onto something. He seems to view women as a means to an end. He doesn’t want a relationship with a person, he wants somebody beautiful. Nothing else matters.

What kind of woman, beautiful or otherwise, wants to be with someone who only cares what she looks like? A woman who is as shallow, self-absorbed and exploitive as und. So und, you are correct. What do you have to offer a shallow, exploitive person? You’ve indicated you’re not particularly good-looking or wealthy. So the answer is, not much.

That’s where game comes in. Your other option is to find a woman who happens to be beautiful and also has terrible self-esteem / relationship skills, so you can bamboozle her into staying with you. So I believe you have correctly identified situation. More decent people might not want to take advantage of that, but you’ve indicated you are not so encumbered.

Your mistake comes in in believing that you are a good person – in fact, an exceptionally open-minded man – because you acknowledge that women are people and deserve financial autonomy. I bet you are even willing to believe that some black people are smart! Yes, you are obviously a highly evolved individual. Please contact the Dali Lama when you have time.

Or you can acknowledge that you are kind of a terrible person, and you are looking for a similarly terrible or damaged person. And stop feeling so sorry for yourself that women aren’t giving you Hot!!!!! points for stuff like breathing air and not kicking them in the shins. My furniture is more self aware and emotionally mature than you.

For the record, you are talking about lust. Which of course is great and fun. And it lasted a month for you. Even for lust, that’s not very long.

I wish you the best in finding short and unsatisfying relationships with no real intimacy. You deserve them.

katz
10 years ago

I’m assuming the biology student dumped his sorry ass. Probably because he viewed her as a Barbie doll with a pulse.

Or because he tried to talk about biology.

kittehserf
10 years ago

Alex:

And yes, all of these things can and have led to incredible sex. My most recent casual partner beat me at a thumb war.

What is a thumb war? I need to know! It sounds like a game Mr K and I should be playing.

fromafar2013
fromafar2013
10 years ago

1 2 3 4 I declare a thumb war!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thumb_war

Tessa
10 years ago

Thumb war is when you clasp each other hands and try to press down the other person’s thumb. Also known as thumb wrestling.

On a side note, other than women complaining about how all the good men are either married or gay, has undfreeland said how gay and lesbian types fit into this? I need to know if I’m supposed to like hot, aloof abusive womem or hot rich women if I’m going to decide to subscribe to his newsletter.

Viscaria
Viscaria
10 years ago

Oh dear, Tessa, did undfreeland not tell you? Everyone is straight!

I was surprised also.

kittehserf
10 years ago

Buttercup:

The ego bubble becomes like a third person in the relationship, constantly demanding to be fed and validated and stroked. It’s exhausting.

And the worst thing it, it’s taking the place that rightfully belongs to the Furrinati.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

I’m still trying to figure out if I’m supposed to want to submit to a hot rich alpha when I’m with a man and then become one myself when I’m with a woman.

Lea
Lea
10 years ago

The best month of my life was when I was with an extremely beautiful woman who adored me.

That is the saddest shit ever.

That’s the best thing that ever happened to you?

You’re projecting your shallow, needy hang ups onto everyone else.

You only liked her for her “well proportioned face” and the feels a person with those particular physical attributes paying attention to you provided. Yes, that’s treating a person as a prop. She could have been any woman with a “well proportioned” face. That’s what you mean by “quality”? Damn, son.

kittehserf
10 years ago

Being with a truly beautiful woman is great. Not for social validation. It’s great because every time you look at them, you’re blown away. It’s because sex with someone who can turn you on fully clothed, just being there, is unbelievable.

Fuck, you are stupid. You still haven’t got it through your thick skull that people who are not conventionally beautiful feel that way about each other.

I’m not conventionally beautiful, or youthful, or skinny, or any of those things that are supposedly the only “not fetish” territory, but I know damn well my husband gets blown away looking at me, clothed or not.

Everything you type proves over again that you don’t see women as people and that it’s all about your ego and your validation. If it wasn’t, you wouldn’t be harping on about beautiful women and how you have such a sad boner because none of them’s interested in you.

Tip: it’s nothing to do with your looks. It’s because you’re an objectionable little shite.

@all the notcreepy people: thumb wars, thank ‘ee!

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