Curious about the views of the people scheduled to speak at A Voice for Men’s “Men’s Issues” conference next week? Here’s a little video guide. CONTENT WARNING: Domestic violence, rape, incest.
If you’d like to have their quotes in writing for future reference, here’s a transcript of the quotes used in the video. I’ve linked to the source of each quote (or to posts of mine that discuss the quotes in greater detail). Enjoy!
Mike Buchanan has said:
I believe girls learn at a young age that whining gets them what they want, especially from over-indulgent parents who might later wonder why their daughters became Entitlement Princesses. Inevitably these girls continue whining into adolescence and adulthood because they continue to get what they want. It’s up to men to break the cycle …
Men living in houses with cellars can put a sign on the cellar door, ‘The Whine Cellar’, and politely direct whining women towards it. In houses without a cellar, the smallest room in the house – or possibly the garden shed – could be designated ‘The Whine Box’.
Mike Buchanan is a speaker at the “Men’s Issues” conference in Detroit organized by A Voice for Men
Mike Buchanan is a voice of hatred
SOURCE for Buchanan’s quote
Stefan Molyneux has said:
Women who choose the assholes will fucking end this race. They will fucking end this human race, if we don’t start holding them a-fucking-ccountable. … Women who choose assholes guarantee child abuse. Women who choose assholes guarantee criminality, sociopathy. Politicians, all the cold-hearted jerks who run the world came out of the vaginas of women who married assholes.
And I don’t know how to make the world a better place without holding women accountable for choosing assholes. Your dad was an asshole because your mother chose him. Because it works on so many women. If “asshole” wasn’t a great reproductive strategy it would have been gone long ago. Women keep that black bastard flame alive. They cup their hands around it, they protect it with their bodies. They keep the evil of the species going by continually choosing these guys.
If being an asshole didn’t get women, there would be no assholes left. If women chose nice guys over assholes we would have a glorious and peaceful world in one generation. Women determine the personality traits of the men because women choose who to have sex with, and who to have children with, and who to expose those children to. …
Your dad is who he is fundamentally because your mother was willing to fuck him and have you. Willing and eager to fuck the monster. Stop fucking monsters and we get a great world. Keep fucking monsters, we get catastrophes, we get war, we get nuclear weapons, we get national debt, we get incarcerations … Women worship at the feet of the devil and wonder why the world is evil. And then you know what they say? We’re victims!
Stefan Molyneux is a scheduled speaker at the “Men’s Issues” conference in Detroit organized by A Voice for Men.
Stefan Molyneux is a voice of hatred
SOURCE for Molyneux’s quote. NOTE: The text above is a more complete version of the slightly truncated quote used in the video, which was edited for clarity, for length, and to remove some repetition.
Erin Pizzey has said:
If you’re referring to Paul’s statement that many or most women fantasize about being taken, I’m sorry but that’s the truth. That doesn’t mean they want to be raped, but it’s a fantasy I think almost all women have. And I think he went on to say that feminists like Andrea Dworkin who were and are so obsessed with rape are really projecting their own unconscious sexual frustration because men don’t give them enough attention. Andrea was a very sad lonely woman like this–I didn’t know her but I knew of her, and I knew Susan Browmiller and you can just read her stuff to see it there.
Erin Pizzey is a scheduled speaker at the “Men’s Issues” conference in Detroit organized by A Voice for Men
Erin Pizzey is a voice of hatred
SOURCE of Pizzey’s quote. NOTE: The text above is a complete version of the slightly truncated quote used in the video, which was edited for clarity.
Karen Straughan has written:
I used to live under a young couple with a baby. I’d listen as she followed him from room to room upstairs, stomping, slamming things, throwing things, screaming. After about an hour, he’d eventually hit her, and everything would go quiet. An hour after that, they’d be out with the baby in the stroller, looking perfectly content with each other.
A man I know who has experience with men in abusive relationships would get his clients to answer a questionnaire. Things like, “after the violence, did you have sex?” “If so, how would you rate the sex?” 100% of men in reciprocally abusive relationships said “yes” to the first, and “scorching” to the second.
He also posited that the much-quoted cycle of violence–the build-up, the explosion, the honeymoon period–correlates with foreplay, orgasm and post-coital bliss.
Erin Pizzey called it “consensual violence”, and said in the main, that was the type she’d see at her shelter. It is also the type that results in the most severe injuries in women, surprise surprise, likely because our “never EVER hit a woman” mentality has those men waiting until they completely lose control of their emotions before giving their women what they’re demanding.
Karen Straughan is a speaker at the “Men’s Issues” conference in Detroit organized by A Voice for Men
Karen Straughan is a voice of hatred
SOURCE for Straughan’s quote.
Warren Farrell has said:
The worst aspect of dating from the perspective of many men is how dating can feel to a man like robbery by social custom …
Evenings of paying to be rejected can feel like a male version of date rape.
If a man ignoring a woman’s verbal “no” is committing date rape, then a woman who says “no” with her verbal language but “yes” with her body language is committing date fraud. …
We have forgotten that before we began calling this date rape and date fraud, we called it exciting.
Somehow, women’s romance novels are not titled He Stopped When I Said “No”. They are, though, titled Sweet Savage Love, in which the woman rejects the hand of her gentler lover who saves her from the rapist and marries the man who repeatedly and savagely rapes her. …
It is important that a woman’s “noes” be respected and her “yeses” be respected. And it is also important when her nonverbal “yeses” … conflict with those verbal “noes” that the man not be put in jail for choosing the “yes” over the “no.” He might just be trying to become her fantasy.
Warren Farrell is a speaker at the “Men’s Issues” conference in Detroit organized by A Voice for Men
Warren Farrell is a voice of hatred
SOURCE for Farrell’s quote.
Warren Farrell has said:
Incest is like a magnifying glass. In some circumstances it magnifies the beauty of the relationship, and in others it magnifies the trauma. …
When I get my most glowing positive cases, 6 out of 200, the incest is part of the family’s open, sensual style of life, wherein sex is an outgrowth of warmth and affection. …
[M]illions of people who are now refraining from touching, holding, and … caressing their children, when that is really a part of a caring, loving expression, are repressing the sexuality of a lot of children and themselves. Maybe this needs repressing, and maybe it doesn’t.
Warren Farrell is a speaker at the “Men’s Issues” conference in Detroit organized by A Voice for Men
Warren Farrell is a voice of hatred
SOURCE for Farrell’s quote. I have removed a word that appears in the original interview but that Farrell insists he did not say.
Paul Elam has said:
In the name of equality and fairness, I am proclaiming October to be Bash a Violent Bitch Month.
I’d like to make it the objective for the remainder of this month, and all the Octobers that follow, for men who are being attacked and physically abused by women – to beat the living shit out of them. I don’t mean subdue them, or deliver an open handed pop on the face to get them to settle down. I mean literally to grab them by the hair and smack their face against the wall till the smugness of beating on someone because you know they won’t fight back drains from their nose with a few million red corpuscles.
And then make them clean up the mess.
Now, am I serious about this?
No. Not because it’s wrong. It’s not wrong.
But it isn’t worth the time behind bars or the abuse of anger management training that men must endure if they are uppity enough to defend themselves from female attackers.
Paul Elam is the central organizer of the “Men’s Issues” conference in Detroit, and the founder of A Voice for Men
Paul Elam is a voice of hatred
SOURCE for Elam’s quote.
For a detailed look at the homophobia of Anne Cools, another speaker at the conference, see here.
Big thanks to everyone who helped with the video!
FFS. Not getting custody isn’t oppression! Are you sure you’re not an MRA, elizabeth?
And speaking of custody does anyone have the article that looked at the results of custody cases and concluded that the main reason more mothers get custody than fathers is because the fathers seldom ask? I don’t have it in my bookmarks and it shreds one of Elizabeth’s bad arguments.
Some arguments need to happen. I just cannot get behind the idea that bringing up inequities is worse than doing nothing about inequities.
Also, elizabeth, I’m not sure you’re using “oppressed” correctly there. One instance of poor behavior on the part of one person does not constitute oppression. Oppression requires, I believe, a systematic pattern of behavior, institutionalized unfairness.
Unfortunately, as one can tell from reading this blog, MRAs tend to prove the generalizations made about them. I didn’t gain my opinion from reading this blog – it came from actually talking to MRAs, not one who remained consistently sincere. They’ve largely proven themselves to be dishonest and with views I simply found myself repulsed by.
You are not the first to make this argument here and it is not like those of us who read this blog are not familiar with an instance or two with an MRA making a valid point (being rarely self-critical). But, in the big picture, those are miniscule in comparison to the actual leadership of the MRA – who seem to reflect what most of its proponents think.
I’ve said this to Libertarians as well, especially when claiming their left-wing version mattered: perhaps – among other Libertarians – that means something, but not to anyone outside the group. Expecting non-proponents to keep track of every branch of a particular socio-political philosophy is rather unreasonable and it is understandable when they base if off the most popular version of it on display. Of course, regardless of how many of my Left-Libertarian friends keep saying otherwise, people like the Koch Bros. or Ron Paul are still their most popular representatives.
I’d also like to point out that, speaking against generalizing the MRA, you have basically generalized feminism extensively. This may be because you only have a vague familiarity with it and have been influenced by the kind of exaggerated demonizations that MRAs, much like many socially conservative/reactionary men before, have used to make feminism seem illegitimate. The difference here is that this blog documents not only MRA leadership but also a good deal of random commentators at “Manosphere” sites that often share similarly misogynistic views, whereas they skew facts about feminism based on little more than personal anecdotes (which are not the best form of evidence) and pure “gut-feeling” speculation (ditto).
In person? Every MRA or MRA-sympathetic individual I’ve are as obnoxious as the ones I’ve dealt with online, but I’ve yet to meet any of the kinds of feminists they talk about as if they are legion. Excluding overly-strident university students in their early 20’s – which is generally common with any subject at universities (it’s also where I come across aforementioned MRAs and allies).
It’s more unavoidable than you think. It’s personal to a lot of people and it is difficult for them to be so detached that they may as well be talking about whether they prefer one color or ice cream flavor over another. Adding to the fact many MRAs regularly take things like rape or domestic abuse lightly, it’s hard to not be on the defensive – at least online where anonymity grants others the means to be needlessly antagonistic and avoid responsibility. That’s less of a problem in personal conversation in public.
Honestly? You are getting hung up on labels. My point is that whatever a particular group or philosophy call themselves is still not as important as the ideas which they support and promote. That’s why I said names can be misleading: there’ve been totalitarian groups who called themselves “democratic” – perhaps knowing those gullible enough will join in, even against their own interests. I think it is the same case with MRAs as their name connotes having a focus on men’s issues – yet they rarely seem to do that as much as find ways to blame it on women and take their frustrations out on them.
Woodyred
“@weirwoodtreehugger – what are you ? a sick maniac ? surely their original context was not to be snipped out of conversations to purposefully make them look like … women haters or whatever – and then compiled into a video by the biggest feminist fruit loop on youtube – and even then – read by other people. you people are absolutely insane- and yes – call me ableist – you f**king lunatics.”
Fruit loop
…
Thou shall not use my name for ableism. Or crazy, insane or lunatics.
Why do you want to be a ableist if you know people that have mental conditions? Won’t you hate it if someone used those terms to call them that? And plus just because you know some people doesn’t give you a right to use ableist terms. None of it makes sense and it’s insensitive.
Elizabeth
“If the name encapsulated all genders and rooted for gender equality as a whole there would be comparably minimal backlash, and gender equality would be achieved much more quickly.”
Ally s
“But the truth is that women are oppressed not men. And therefore women need a movement, not men. That’s precisely why men aren’t included. They are oppressors of women.”
Not to mention that abuse and rape victims are mostly women so that’s why they are being helped more. Patriarchy hurts everyone but mostly women.
Marinerachel & I would like to take bets on whether elizabeth is actually Erin because we’re getting that kind of vibe over here.
As a new commenter, may I ask who Erin is/was?
“oppressed = subject to harsh and authoritarian treatment” – taking your kids away from you seems to fit into that definition for me
… could be. I’m not getting an Erin vibe, but I won’t discount it.
If Elizabeth is Erin, than I’m kind of surprised they’ve lasted so long without melting down to gendered slurs. I mean, Erin kind of went from “I’m a woman, so take me seriously” to “BLEEPING BLEEPS!!!!” in no time flat.
hippodameia8527 I’m not arguing, I’m standing up fro what I believe in.
What do you believe in Elizabeth?
Yeah, now that you’ve pointed it out, there is a certain familiarity . . .
I am not Erin whoever that is….
I believe in all life on earth living to the highest standards possible
Oh, so it’s OK for you to argue, but not us. Gotcha.
Omnicrom, Erin was a self-admitted dude (by the end) trolling under a lady-nym in order to drop words of manly wisdom from a feminine voice.
We kinda caught the misogyny of his advice dropping, and asked the kind lady to halt her nasty misogynistic stuff and reconsider.
Erin was shocked that we could actually detect misogyny from a ‘female’, and started calling us all sorts of gendered slurs.
It was kind of hilarious, and sad at the same time.
By the way, have you gotten a welcome package yet?
So is everyone else here.
Erin was sad – and definitely pathetic enough to attempt socking.
Okay, buttting in here cuz I saw the thread was updating fast 😀
@omnicron
Just the alpha
feministally who spoke SEVEN LANGUAGES and raised chickens.@
erinelizabethWow what a meaningless stock phrase spitting out says so little about what you actually think should happen.
Yes, Saintnick86, but we’re all standing up in the wrong way because we’re mean. Or something. Funny how trolls always have such delicate feelings, isn’t it?
Omnicrom
“And speaking of custody does anyone have the article that looked at the results of custody cases and concluded that the main reason more mothers get custody than fathers is because the fathers seldom ask? I don’t have it in my bookmarks and it shreds one of Elizabeth’s bad arguments.”
A specific article? I found this, will it help?
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/cathy-meyer/dispelling-the-myth-of-ge_b_1617115.html
Elizabeth
Oppression has to affect everyone of that particular group, Gender/race/etc. Taking kids away is not being oppressed. The court wants what is best for the child/children.
The mothers are seen in society as the caretakers and plus all of fathers have to do is ask and he shall receive or at least have more time in visitation. I said this in another post on this blog it’s in the Top Posts on the right side of this page, it’s the first one. And I just provided a link in this comment.
Elizabeth,
Since men get full custody the vast majority of the time, when they actually request it, who is snatching babies from men en masse? Could you provide a citation instead of you anecdote that your father lost custody out of what you suppose to be male oppression? That’s a far fetched claim considering the history of women being forced to give up their kids (as well as earnings) if they left their husbands for any reason. It’s also feminism and it’s dismantling of rigid gender rolls that has and continues to insist that gender does not determine child rearing skills. When women are the main caregiver prior to divorce, it makes sense that a judge will assume that they continue being the main care giver. While there are certainly insidence of men being treated unfairly, that does not = institutional oppression.
BTW, your experiences do not invalidate the lived experiences of other women. I’ve never been murdered by my male partner. That does not make any of the women who have been any less dead.
What the everloving fuck does this mean? Yes we here have done something to make MRAs angry. We’re all either women or people who aren’t women but are not misogynistic enough to meet MRA standards. Is that something we’re supposed to apologize for? Am I supposed to be apologetic for not myself and my fellow women? Fuck that.
You’re pretty much arguing that if a troll comes in here and says I’m asking for it if raped while drunk or sexual harassment is a privilege because I’m oppressing men with my butt my response should be “That’s a fair and valid opinion good sir. Thank you for bringing it to my attention.”
Hell to the fuck now. Whether or not I’m a human being is not up for debate. There is no dissenting opinion on the matter I will respect. Anyone who says bigoted things not only against a group I’m in but about any marginalized group will get a verbal smackdown. No guilt on my part for that.
I don’t think you’re here in good faith. I don’t know if you’re a sock but you are an MRA troll. It’s starting to seep out. You won’t be able to hide it much longer.
@elizabeth
You don’t seem to grasp that systematic oppression and personal misfortune are two separate things. You can have endless amount of the latter and yet never be oppressed.
That’s nice dear.
Elizabeth, how the ever loving fuck is “standing up for what you believe in” any different from arguing? When these misogynist argue that I deserve to be raped, beaten and blamed for all the evil in the world, how do I stand up for myself without arguing?
You can take your faux civility and your doormat attitude and fuck straight off.
If you want to stroke the egos of men people who dispize you, go for it. Don’t tell us we need to do the same. We don’t.
Hey y’all, remember when LGBTQ folks kissed homophobe’s asses until they decided out of the kindness in their hearts to stop hating anyone not conforming to their bigoted views and started treating them like equal human beings?
Me either.
Elizabeth, that never works. People of color cannot be nice enough to racists to make them stop being horrible, wrong headed assholes. Neither can women be nice enough to misogynists to make them stop raging every time we make any progress toward equality.
If you haven’t figured that out yet and you aren’t yet another MRAsshole pretending to be a woman, I feel for ya.
Not sorry enough not to tell you to fuck off, though. You came to a thread about MRAs supporting and encouraging rape, DV and hatred of women and complained that we are not charitable enough to the bigots who encourage it. That disgusts me. You disgust me.