Love is in the air at the Chateau Heartiste, the online home of the racist, woman-hating pickup artiste with an “he” at the start of his made up name. In a recent post, Heartiste responds to a reader with the plaintive question: Can sluts fall in love?
Heartiste takes the opportunity to drop some (pseudo)science on the questioner. By which I mean he plucks this nugget of not-quite-scientific nonsense from his posterior:
Absolutely. But they can also fall out of love. And they do both more easily than non-sluts.
Sluts are a strange amalgam of genetic, environmental, and “gray area” influences. Hormones are a good example of a gray area somewhere between the environment and genes which shapes character. While I’ve no hard evidence, I’d bet that sluts release less oxytocin than normal women do during lovemaking, which means the hard slut is less likely to emotionally bond when she’s spermally bonded.
Ah love, sweet ineffable love!
It’s not quite clear how Heartiste became an expert on love, since he seems to thoroughly hate the women he spends so much of his life obsessing about.
Elsewhere in the same “reader mailbag” post, for example, he urges another question-writer to gaslight a former girlfriend who is still showing interest in him in order to score some easy sex. I’ve bolded some of the more repugnant bits for those who’d rather skim than read Mr. H.
She wants the lines of communication open, because she still has hope you’ll give her what she needs. Reply, but only a fraction of the time she texts. Initially, keep it friendly and frivolous, but don’t allow yourself to get boxed into a “friends forever?” interrogation. If she starts down that road, first, know she doesn’t really mean it, and second, amputate that rotten limb of conversation promptly. “You’re so funny” is a reply that will light a fire under her hamster’s ass. Anytime she sends you one of those “just thinking about you” texts, reply “aw that’s sweet.” If she texts, “just got our hair done”, reply, “thanks! i needed to know this.”
The idea is that you are reinforcing your relative higher value by repeatedly and (some would say) sadistically mocking her eagerness to keep you in her life.
Allow for a few weeks of this empty banter, then maneuver her into your fornication zone with a disarming suggestion: “If you need to talk, you can swing by tomorrow (tonight’s no good)”. Through the expert deployment of ambiguous promises, you want her to believe you are warming to the idea of a committed, conventional long-term relationship. The goal is increasing perceptions of your “commitment attainability”, and that will require some feints to the beta side. Convinced of your good intentions, you can extract sexual goodies in this manner for another six months or so, before the process begins anew.
What a charmer!
Heartiste is fond of spinning out these sorts of sadistic fantasies, and his fans lap them up. It’s not clear if any of them have spoken to an actual human woman in years.
She becomes a hard slut after the spermal bonding sets up.
All the lulz for the Spermabond jokes.
I think “spermally bonded” is supposed to be a sticky-sheets joke, but all of the bullshit about oxytocin and “hard sluts” is throwing us off. Yet another example of Heartiste tripping over his own dick in pursuit of all that sweet, sweet Tucker Max cash. Also, as long as we’re on the subject of trying to parse PUA terms of art, does anybody know what the hell a “hard” slut is supposed to be? I’m assuming that it’s in contrast to a “soft” slut, which would be a woman who is vulnerable to a bar pick-up but who isn’t quite vulnerable enough that an enterprising PUA would have to exercise constant vigilance against other men picking her up from under him (so to speak).
“Spermally bonded.” These guys just love the idea that their spunk is a magic potion (LIQUID FUCKING GOLD) that causes women to become their sex-slaves, don’t they? Like a really smutty twist on the blood-bonded ghouls in Vampire: The Masquerade.
Spermal bonding just made me wonder what he eats, since, y’know, sperm isn’t supposed to be a glue alternative.
Isn’t chimpanzee sperm more like that? A solid plug rather than a liquid?
…I am ashamed that I know something about chimpanzee sperm.
Spermally bonded?? WTH is that?
“While I’ve no hard evidence, I’d bet that sluts release less oxytocin than normal women do..”
Not to quibble with such a fine example of peer reviewed science, but I suggest the exact opposite. Those able to engage in prostitution without the aid of several addictive substances, probably have a surplus of oxytocin. Oxytocin is what gives you a grin and bear it tolerance for the intolerable, like babies throwing up on you or men using you as a toilet.
What, “spermically bonded”? Say what now.
Wow, thanks, insanitybytes. Nice of you to suggest that sex workers must be physically abnormal.
@insanitybytes22
I had the exact same response when I read that – that it seems likelier that it would be more rather than less oxytocin than normal.
Then I realized I was trying to logically analyze something that is bullshit in the strictest sense of the word (in that the person saying it neither knows nor cares whether the statement is factual or not, only whether it is tactically useful).
…I hate having to deal with bullshitters, because my initial impulse is to always take an argument at face value. They’re a constant reminder that I’ve got a gullible streak a mile wide.
I doubt that’s what s/he’s doing, duckbunny. Especially since in the strictest sense of the word, *everybody* is “abnormal.”
I suspect he is not using “slut” to literally mean sex worker but a woman who’s Doin Sex Rong, according to his own arbitrary standard.
Maybe sluts of any hardness rating are less likely to emotionally bond because they’re annoyed at being spermally bonded to this guy’s nasty sheets.
Spermal bonding is more likely what happens to their fingers and palms in the lonely gloom of their parents’ basements.
Karalora — hey now, most clans are, on a whole, a hell of a lot nicer to their ghouls than these guys are to women! They’re like…Tzimisce or something.
I’ve always wondered how people define slut. Interestingly, I just about never get called that even though according to every survey I see I’ve had a higher than average number of sexual partners. Is it because I’m kind of introverted and reserved around people I don’t know well and don’t flirt much?
That word has never struck me as having anything to do with number of sexual partners. It’s sometimes a gendered slur many men use against women when she does something he doesn’t like. It’s sometimes used by another woman who has internalized misogyny and is threatened by something the woman being called a slut has done.
At least that’s been my experience.
There’s a street in San Francisco called “Sloat,” and for a while in college, I tried to get people to use it as a male analogue for slut.
It never caught on, unfortunately; it took me a few more years to realize that there was no “market” (if I can use that term in this context) for a word that describes male promiscuity outside a committed relationship in a negative light.
Nope, no male privilege there….
‘What the duce?’ Is what I say whenever I read stupid stuff like this.
WWTH
“I’ve always wondered how people define slut. Interestingly, I just about never get called that even though according to every survey I see I’ve had a higher than average number of sexual partners. Is it because I’m kind of introverted and reserved around people I don’t know well and don’t flirt much?
That word has never struck me as having anything to do with number of sexual partners. It’s sometimes a gendered slur many men use against women when she does something he doesn’t like. It’s sometimes used by another woman who has internalized misogyny and is threatened by something the woman being called a slut has done.
At least that’s been my experience.”
I believe it’s all about control and jealously. The same goes for other gender slurs.
I don’t know why, but this really amused me.
Since there isn’t really a definition of slut vs non-slut (people who’ll sleep with me vs people who won’t is a little too subjective), he basically said, some people can fall in and out of love more easily than other people.
Duh.
PUAs: the only way they can get females to have sex with them is to constantly lie.
These guys must be great employees too, as they have framed lying as a norm.
Hard sluts are, of course, more difficult to scratch and tend to have large smooth surfaces along naturally occurring cleavage.
Spermal bonding tends to be more effective on scuffed surfaces, and thus hard sluts are less prone to it.
So, what number is considered a “hard” slut on D’ohs Hardness Scale?
Are we talking like a 7 or 8?
A hard slut is typically listed as a 9 or a 10 but when the Professional Unbiased Analyzer finds out that she’s a slut her
valuehardness drops down to a 5 or so. She tends to keep more of it if she’s, like, really hot. Like, REALLY hot, y’know?I too take issue with the comment calling prostitution “Men using women as toilets”.
Sex workers = / = human toilets. Don’t do that.
…and please do not excuse or hand wave comments like that away.