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A Voice for Men's Threatener-in-Chief Paul Elam demands that feminists pay security costs for his group's conference

Paul Elam, Man of Peace
Paul Elam, Man of Peace

Well, you have to admit, he’s got chutzpah.

You may have heard that A Voice for Men is sponsoring what it calls the First International Conference on Men’s Issues later this month in Detroit, featuring such notable celebrity speakers as “internationally recognized writer, lecturer and videographer” Karen “Girl Writes What” Straughan, “former mental health professional” Paul “Boy Yells A Lot” Elam, Warren “Boys Aren’t Hurt By Incest a Lot” Farrell, and, well, a collection of other equally exciting names.

But there have been some doubts about it happening from the start. It took some time for the AVFMers to sell enough tickets to enable them to cover the costs of the event.

And now it the costs of the event are going up further: according to a letter that Elam has posted to his site, the hotel that will be hosting the conference has gotten “numerous calls and threats” of a violent nature because of the conference, and is demanding that AVFM cover the costs of additional security at the event.

So Elam has decided that feminists should pay some of these costs, in order to prove they’re “not like that.”

The death threats from feminists, in the attempt to silence these esteemed speakers, has resulted in the conference incurring tens of thousands of dollars in additional security costs.

We plan on launching a fundraiser tomorrow to address those needs, but I want to give the feminists who stand by free speech and assert decisively that these thugs do not represent what feminism is about, to have an early shot at helping us address the gender issues that impact men and boys in an open forum.

He’s even set up a special Paypal button “for feminists only.”

Excuse me?

Let’s be clear here: Death threats are bad. Other sorts of threats are bad. Harassment is bad. Shutting down talks given by people you don’t like is bad. Whoever made the threats against AVFM’s conference, feminist or not, deserves to be prosecuted.

But as someone who has never promoted violence or threats of violence or any form of harassment aimed at MRAs, and who has in fact spoken out against this on numerous occasions, I’m not actually responsible, even indirectly, for the threats against AVFM’s conference. (I haven’t even written about the conference before.) And neither is any other feminist who’s “not like that.”

Indeed, the idea that we should bankroll AVFM’s conference is a bit like asking anti-racist activists to fund a KKK rally because someone or other sent threats to the Klan.

AVFM, as I have documented rather throroughly, is a hateful organization motivated by a deeply misogynistic ideology. Its rhetoric is consistently threatening, designed to intimidate opponents into shutting up and going away. Elam himself — the master of the not-quite-legally actionable threat — once famously told one opponent that

I find you so pernicious and repugnant that the idea of fucking your shit up gives me an erection. …

Your only real hope is to keep your mouth shut and pretend AVfM and register-her.com does not exist for as long as you can. …

We are coming for you … .

It’s a group whose main form of “activism” has always been harassing individual women; indeed, the Register-Her.com sitte referenced in the above quote (currently offline and being rebuilt) was a phony “offenders registry” that posted the names and some of the personal information of AVFM’s female enemies alongside profiles of serial killers and sexual abusers. AVFM seemed to make a special point of picking vulnerable targets, often college students, evidently feeling that these women would be easier to intimidate.

AVFM has tried to destroy the lives and livelihoods of numerous other enemies, in at least one case through allegedly illegal means.

The site has also participated enthusiastically in misogynistic internet hate-orgies directed at outspoken women like Rebecca Watson and Anita Sarkeesian, women who received and who are still receiving numerous violent threats of rape and murder.

On one occasion, joining up with a hate campaign already heavily populated with white supremacists, Elam targeted a recent college grad for allegedly boasting on her blog that she’s been actively discriminating against white men in her job at the Georgetown Admissions Office. The blog was an obvious hoax and the woman in question had nothing to do with it. Even former KKK leader David Duke realized this before Elam did.

And we can’t forget that AVFM hosted a terrorist manifesto in its activism section for several years, written by Thomas Ball, a Men’s Rights Activist who hoped that his dramatic suicide – he burned himself to death on the steps of a courthouse – would inspire other MRAs to start firebombing courthouses and police stations.

So boys, we need to start burning down police stations and courthouses. … the dirty deeds are being carried out by our local police, prosecutors and judges. These are the people we pay good money to protect us and our families. And what do we get for our tax money? Collaborators who are no different than the Vichy of France or the Quislings of Norway during the Second World War. All because they go along to get along. They are an embarrassment, the whole lot of them. And they need to be held accountable. So burn them out. …

You need to flatten them, like Wile E. Coyote. They need to be taught never to replace the rule of law. BURN-THEM-OUT!

(Emphasis mine.)

AVFM finally removed the manifesto from its “activism” section shortly after the Boston Marathon bombing brought the issue of domestic terrorism back into the limelight. But the site still hosts numerous articles glorifying the author of this manifesto.

Oh, and those associated with AVFM are not above harassing their male critics as well. I get a lot of weird, creepy and threatening emails and comments. It’s rare that the senders are dumb enough to do it under their own name. But that was the case with a creepy and threatening voicemail message I received at 1:38 AM one winter night from a longtime AVFM fan and tireless poster-paster that Elam once described as a “One Man Army” and “an MRA’s MRA.”

And this is the organization that expects feminists like me to pay for its security costs?

I don’t think so.

 

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Shaun Day
Shaun Day
10 years ago

Did a Google image search for “dick vase” and got this.

http://purecontemporary.blogs.com/photos/uncategorized/2008/03/24/uterus.jpg

MISANDRY!

gillyrosebee
gillyrosebee
10 years ago

cloudiah, because I still have my usgs alerts set up, I just got the notice! I still have a frame with pictures from the Getty that has a crack in the corner because the wire snapped during the Chino Hills quake. Only 5.6 or so, but that was the only earthquake of my LA years!

cloudiah
cloudiah
10 years ago

This was actually my first quake on a higher floor (I’m temporarily staying at my mother’s, which is on the 8th floor). It lasted a loooooooooooooooong time.

LBT (with an open writeathon!)

RE: Shaun Day

That lemon is not ornamental enough.

RE: gillyrosebee

COCKJAZZLING.

gillyrosebee
gillyrosebee
10 years ago

Oh, and I just cleaned out the top drawer of my desk and I have $1.12, a magnet, five washers of assorted sizes and an old cough drop that I’d be more than happy to donate to the Mammotheer reward fund.

quantumscale
10 years ago

Another possibility is that the hotel realized the true nature of the group, and is trying to get out of the deal without breaking the contract. A bank did this with us when we were trying to get a mortgage 🙁

damselindetech
10 years ago

I noticed Paul Elam has never posted a reward to help track down Jimmy Hoffa and solve his disappearance. HOW SUSPICIOUS! That’s it, I’m calling in an anonymous tip to the FBI.

sparky
sparky
10 years ago

Paul “the idea if fucking their shit up gives me an erection” Elam wants feminists to send him money?

Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha

No.

hippodameia8527
hippodameia8527
10 years ago

I can chip in some shiny buttons for the reward, and five pennies too battered to be accepted by coinstar.

gillyrosebee
gillyrosebee
10 years ago

Yeah, quantumscale, that sounds plausible to me.

LBT: with real Swarovski crystals?!? (Reminds me of that fashion blogger who went and had a wax and vajazzle for some NY fashion mag…)

LBT (with an open writeathon!)

RE: gillyrosebee

Of course! My husband wants only the sparkliest.

Integral
Integral
10 years ago

Clearly we are terrible, terrible people to not chip in to support a conference for proponents of beating women and child molestation. How do we sleep at night.

Shaun Day
Shaun Day
10 years ago

LBT, they just don’t make erotic fruit like they used to.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
10 years ago

*looks around* I can add, um, a dead air freshener and a broken sex toy? Or A LOT of 4″ planters, for some reason grocery stores just love selling plants that are far too large for a 4″ pot in 4″ pots, I have a ton.

Much as I want to get rid of some of those pots, I think offering a broken sex toy is funnier…anyone got a spare scrunchie?

katz
10 years ago

Swarovski crystals sound…sharp.

gillyrosebee
gillyrosebee
10 years ago

@LBT Whew! I was going to warn you that the glue in spray-on glitter is kinda toxic and can lead to an itchy, blotchy rash, not to mention that it takes days to wear off unless you decide you want to try to scrub at it, but after the first couple of hours it REALLY sticks on there and the little sparkly bits are kinda rough-edged, and they tell you not to scrub at it but the glue makes it kinda burn so that you can’t bring yourself to finish and then you only have half a butterfly and that just looks weird and when you call the poison control hotline they just hang up and I am sure they were laughing and I cannot stress strongly enough that you should NOT use alcohol because you already have sorta inflamed skin plus scratches from the sharp edges of the glitter and your best bet at that point is to apply some olive oil (externally) along with lots and lots of white wine (internally) until you pass out and can get some respite from the itching, not to mention the process of seriously questioning your judgement.

Or so I’ve been told.

Ahem.

takshak
takshak
10 years ago

the “fund Elam’s security” reminds me, I need to clean the litter box. There should be something worth sending to Elam in there…..

Shaun Day
Shaun Day
10 years ago

OH! I had good news too! We have a kitteh overlord. She is grey and white and fits in the palm of my hand and attacks dogs who are trying to love her. And thinks she’s half feather boa, half parrot.

katz
10 years ago

Or so I’ve been told.

XD

Shaun Day
Shaun Day
10 years ago

Gillyrosebee: my mother is allergic to body paint. There’s only one way she could know this. There’s also only one completely different way *I* could know this.

gillyrosebee
gillyrosebee
10 years ago

Shaun Day, my… um… condolences?

At least you have a kitten to take your mind off it! Do you have any pictures?

Shaun Day
Shaun Day
10 years ago

I do have pictures, but they have Mouse in them and I try to keep her pictures under lock and key. I’ll take some of her attacking the Pitbull-Boxer cross. When she first came here she was smaller than his tongue. She has no fear.

kittehserf
10 years ago

OH! I had good news too! We have a kitteh overlord. She is grey and white and fits in the palm of my hand and attacks dogs who are trying to love her. And thinks she’s half feather boa, half parrot.

Pictures! Kit pictures! Want!

tealily
tealily
10 years ago

While I may believe that the hotel received a few calls protesting the conference, I don’t believe for a minute they were threatening in nature, because if so, the media in this town would have been all over it. That stuff gets front and center attention here and there has been no word anywhere in print or on the newscasts.

I think Elam is just scared to death nobody really cares.

A WoC
A WoC
10 years ago