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Today in Imaginary Feminism: The Slap Circle of Misandry

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 Over on the Men’s Rights subreddit, the neverending struggle against imaginary feminists continues apace. Today, one brand-new Redditor, a self-described former feminist, won himself several dozen upvotes from the regulars by bringing them a literally unbelievable tale of his adventures with a coven of slap-happy feminists.

I stopped calling myself a feminist a few years ago when I went to a meeting and was told “men are inly allowed in this safe space if they participate in a slap circle.”

The idea was that it would be harder for me to intimidate with my six foot stature if all the women had a chance to slap me in the face. I left.

Another guy actually did it.

It’s all true. I WAS THAT GUY.

BUT WHO WAS PHONE?

Actually, no. If this dude’s story is true, I will literally eat my cats.

While most of the Men’s Rightsers commenting in the thread seem to have swallowed this story whole, “slap circles” aren’t actually a thing in feminism.

They are a thing, though, amongst bored and/or drunk young men (and sometimes women) around the world, as countless videos on YouTube can attest.

As as site called Hungry Teen explains, a “Slap Circle” is

A great way to bond with friends, release aggression and stimulate the face. The Slap Circle is a game made for the more hardcore, daring person and can be used as a test for finding the manliest of the group. Although adopting female fighting techniques, the slap circle appeals far more to men. Nothing is required for this game, other than a hand, a face and a set of balls.

All you do, is stand in a circle and slap the person to your right in the face, while waiting for a slap from the person on your left. If you’ve had enough, you step out of the circle and the last two standing fight it out for the winner.

I eagerly await stories in the Men’s Rights subreddit detailing Andrea Dworkin’s demand that all men and boys be forced to take the Cinnamon Challenge and all those insidious mandatory nut shot seminars being forced upon all college students unfortunate enough to be born with a pair of balls.

Thanks to Cloudiah for the heads up, and the good people of the AgainstMensRights subreddit for the Hungry Teen quote.

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katz
10 years ago

WWTH, that husky is all “They’re not paying me enough for this.”

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

@ Lea

Aw. I hope you took pictures.

Scotland in winter is the pits. Go to school in the dark, come home in the dark. We had to play sports at lunchtime rather than after school because that was the only time there was any daylight.

hrovitnir
hrovitnir
10 years ago

Ha, yeah, people suggest Scotland to me because I hate heat so very much. But I don’t think I could handle an extra helping of GREY. Nope nope nope.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

The constant grey is a bit depressing. Stays light till really late in the summer, though, and all that rain means things are nice and green.

kittehserf
10 years ago

There definitely needs to be a weather-swapping service. We could exchange some of our glaring summer sunshine for some of Scotland’s winter grey grey grey.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

The forecast in Scotland is grey with some more grey. Over the weekend you can expect grey and some rain, with a possibility of grey and sleet on Sunday.

katz
10 years ago

If we’re weather-swapping with Scotland, I call first dibs.

brooked
brooked
10 years ago

That is one touchy-feely raccoon.

Is anyone else put off by the dad ordering the toddler to hug Husky so he can get better footage for the internet? I was happy when the dogged plopped down, and the kid grabbed it’s sippy cup and peaced out. Why don’t YOU hug Husky, dude.

Arctic Ape
Arctic Ape
10 years ago

Greendaywantsavatars:

our states homeschool is completely unmonitored. If your parents say you’re doing homeschool, you can do it, but there’s not really any tests or anyone who stops by to make sure we’re learning stuff.

Uh…how does this work? I assume there’s some voluntary testing so the school authorities can grant you a diploma?

Someone mentioned universities not accepting homeschooled students. I guess that means, even if you have some sort of diploma? I’ve heard that in many US states where homeschooling is technically monitored, testing standards are incredibly loose or poorly enforced.

Zolnier
Zolnier
10 years ago

I know of at least one young guy in my town (maybe sixteen or seventeen) whose parents said he was home-schooling. Turned out they just had him work at their shop instead. So yeah lax monitoring is a problem here as well.

Arctic Ape
Arctic Ape
10 years ago

I keep thinking of Kimi Raikkonnen when I see zir name now

Kimi Räikkönen, if you want to impress people with correct spelling (I assume you knew the dots but couldn’t spell them out easily).

He has a sibling named Mika

For a moment I thought you were referring to Räikkönen 🙂 Mika would be a brother, specifically.

I even looked Wikipedia, apparently Finnish F1 drivers include Mika Häkkinen and Mika Salo. That’s why I’d half remembered hearing about “Mika Räikkönen” in association with F1. I’m not a sports person 🙂

Ledasmom
Ledasmom
10 years ago

I’ve always been impressed by people who do homeschooling right, because I could never do it. I know I’d be a very bad teacher if I had to do all the teaching; I could no more homeschool than I could figure-skate in the Olympics.

theseventhguest
theseventhguest
10 years ago

@fade
ah! im so happy i was helpful! i still read, im just not up to the typey-typey much lately.

Stevie
Stevie
10 years ago

Ok, it’s 2.13 pm in London, England.

I apologise.

Viscaria
Viscaria
10 years ago

For all my many, many, many complaints about this Northern country, I absolutely revel in the 16 hours of daylight this time of year. It brings me life.

marinerachel
marinerachel
10 years ago

Honestly, just about everyone comes out of high school stupid in some respect, whether they did it at home or in public or private school. You don’t need stellar marks in your first and second year of university to get into medical school. You better be getting straight A’s by your third but you can use your first three semesters of university to learn how to think and progress towards excellence. Three or even four satisfactory to good semesters followed by consistent excellence will get you a 4.0 GPA into medical school. Basically, even if you come out of high school at a disadvantage, you have time to figure college out and still get into almost whatever program you want. You’ll be discriminated against by the Ivy League institutions but who cares?

What’s funny is I know someone who was kicked out of a prestigious university at a young age and will now be returning to it to do a third year medical school rotation at their university hospital having finished their BSc, MSc and academic medical education elsewhere.

Nobody can afford medical school though, including all the people who go. Rich kids in medical school do it on loans. Their families supplement them. Whether you can afford it isn’t a question when it comes to medical school. The fact of the matter is you can’t. It’s not a question you bother asking yourself because the answer is no. You do it with the full knowledge each textbook you purchase will have cost you $500 in twenty years once loans are paid off. $200,000+ in loans is just par for the course far as medical school goes.

But yeah, even if you come into college at a disadvantage, you’ve got lots of time to figure it out before getting into medical school is impossible.

Ledasmom
Ledasmom
10 years ago

I am envious of any sunlight right now – here in Massachusetts we’ve been having rain, rain, drizzle, hey! Look at that! Sun!, rain, rain.
The mushrooms look fantastic, though, and I saw a pair of Baltimore orioles yesterday, so it’s good. I’m hoping their nest is near where I saw them; they build fantastic nests, and I haven’t seen one in years.

kittehserf
10 years ago

Kimi Räikkönen, if you want to impress people with correct spelling (I assume you knew the dots but couldn’t spell them out easily).

Yeah, I knew, but was too lazy to chase them up.

The first Flying Finn in F1 was Keke Rosberg, World Champion in 1982. His son Nico is racing now, but he’s a German citizen.

I used to follow F1 in Michael Schumacher’s Ferrari days.

Stevie
Stevie
10 years ago

marinerachel

One of the many ways I screwed up was in not mentioning the fact that in the UK people go directly into Medical School from school; they do not do preliminary degrees, so it’s pretty much all or nothing at the age of 18.

People unable to get into Medical School sometimes take a first degree in the hope of getting into Medical School on the strengths of that degree, but it very rarely happens.

Marie
Marie
10 years ago

@stevie

One of the many ways I screwed up was in not mentioning the fact that in the UK people go directly into Medical School from school; they do not do preliminary degrees, so it’s pretty much all or nothing at the age of 18.

that’s how you’re mentioning your screw up? Not by, idk, all of that weird organ-harvesting shit?

hellkell
hellkell
10 years ago

Wow, Stevie. I’d say one of the many you’ve screwed up is by not apologizing. Stop using lack of sleep as an excuse for your asshole behavior, and while you’re at it, stop using your daughter’s accomplishments as if they’re yours.

emilygoddess
emilygoddess
10 years ago

Maybe a troll will read our cock scrunchie discussion in the other thread and tell all his fellow misogynists that feminists won’t let cis men hang out with us unless they agree to wear cock scrunchies.

Just the cis men? Plenty of trans men have cocks – they’re often detachable and made of silicone, but you can still get a scrunchie on ’em.

Also why aren’t they celebrating? A slap circle of men and women has the REAL EQUALITY of men being able to hit women.

His description doesn’t even match the practice David described. “They all get to hit me” isn’t really feasible in a slap circle – and if the issue was their fear of him hitting them, why would they engage in an activity where exactly that thing would happen?

As an antidote, here are some CATS FREAKING OUT. (My favorite is #8.)

I’m still laughing about #7.

A lot of trolls spout MRA talking points constantly and then play innocent when you someone calls them an MRA. It’s really telling that they feel the need to hide it.

I’m pretty sure it’s an attempt to fake neutrality and make it look like everyday men agree with the MRM.

@thread I read Stevie’s comment as a dig at fundamentalist homeschoolers, not homeschoolers in general. I would have assumed that if you’re not one of the people “homeschooling to prevent impure thoughts” then that comment wasn’t about you.

That said, his/her/zir doubling down has since turned into an attack on homeschooling in general, so maybe I was extending too much benefit of the doubt…

emilygoddess
emilygoddess
10 years ago

Dude, I should know better than to read the thread in stages.

Competitive medical school is how they put together the people who can save your life; if you would really prefer to die then that is entirely your free choice. May I suggest that you insist that your medical notes clearly state ‘Not for Resuscitation’ to clearly reflect your wishes. Organ transplant unit’s will thank uou.

Wow, where the fuck did that come from? The question was “how is ability to get into med school a measure of human worth?” and your answer is “doctors save lives and you obviously don’t respect them and you should just die”?

I’m gonna second the “go to hell”.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
10 years ago

emilygoddess — I took the specificity of “cis men” to imply that these tools only think about cis men // think feminists hate cis men specifically // etc. Mostly because the original thread about cock scrunchies quickly did go into having strap ons available for those without cocks // those not wanting to show theirs.

Probably could’ve been clearer though, seeing how the availability of strap ons at the feminist dive bar was another thread.

Also, those cats were awesome. And Stevie’s organ donor thing was not.

Stevie
Stevie
10 years ago

I did apologise, approximately 15 minutes after I woke up this afternoon.

I felt that adding anything to the statement ‘I apologise’ would suggest that I was trying to turn it into the sort of fake apology which usually means that the person involved doesn’t think they did anything wrong.

I do think that I was wrong, which is why I say, and mean, I apologise.

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