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Pickup artists argue that "Game" is the solution to Elliot Rodger-style rampages. Here's why they're wrong.

From Elliot Rodger's Google+ Profile
From Elliot Rodger’s Google+ Profile

Pickup artists, classy fellows that they are, are using Elliot Rodger’s killing rampage as a marketing ploy. In the comments to one of Rodger’s videos on YouTube, a company called Strategic Dating Coach offered their solution to prevent similar shootings in the future: send disturbed young men who can’t get dates to one of their coaching sessions!

THIS is why we do what we do. TO PREVENT THIS SHIT!!! Could couldn't experience it because he didn't learn to attract women. He should have gone to our website and got our personal dating coaching or purchased one of our products. IF ANYONE NEEDS HELP, CONTACT US! Don’t do anything stupid.

While this response to Rodger’s mass killing is uniquely crass, the argument that β€œGame saves lives” is hardly new. To PUAs like Heartiste and Roosh Valizadeh it’s practically an article of faith.

In the wake of George Sodini’s murderous shooting spree in a Pennsylvania gym in 2009, Heartiste (then known as Roissy) wrote

If Sodini had learned game he would have been able to find another woman and gotten laid after his ex dumped him. He wouldn’t have spent the next 20 years steeped in bile and weighed down by his Sisyphian blue balls, dreaming of vengeance. Game could have saved the lives of the women Sodini killed.

The fact that Sodini had in fact imbibed in the alleged wisdom of pickup artistry, going so far as attending a pricey seminar from old-school pickup guru R. Don Steele, a self-proclaimed expert on dating young women, didn’t lead any in the pickup community to reconsider this position.

Nor has it this time. It is clear that Elliot Rodger was steeped in β€œred pill” thinking about women. And while he wasn’t himself a PUA, he was certainly aware of the basics of β€œGame.” Indeed, he subscribed to a number of PUA channels on YouTube and was a regular commenter on PUAhate, a sleazy forum devoted to criticizing β€œgame,” not because it is manipulative and misogynistic but because it doesn’t work.

On the Roosh V forum earlier today, Roosh acknowledged that Rodger knew at least a little about β€œred pill” ideology – noting that Rodger referred to himself as an”alpha” – but still went ahead and argued that Game was the solution to massacres like this:

He is self-delusional and massively entitled, but exposing him to game may have saved lives.

In a followup comment, Roosh expressed his concerns for the real victims of this tragedy – Pickup artists:

I’m trying to think of ways our enemies will come after us because of this, but if anything, we’re the solution to this sort of murder rampage. This is the society that progressives wanted, where women are fully able to choose the top 10% of alpha males while shaming masculinity, leaving beta males with modest resources in the dust. Of course they will simply push a ban on guns, but this wholly neglects the cause. Seven people died because this guy couldn’t get laid … .

Other commenters were quick to agree. According to someone known as Moma,

Roosh has a very valid point. This will continue to replay over and over again. As human beings, our wiring is very basic yet primal. …

When have you last heard of a porn star shooting up a place? How many have emptied their balls in a hot lizard and then felt the urge to go and smoke 50 strangers?

According to Samseau, the problem wasn’t that Rodger hadn’t heard the Game Gospel; the problem was that he had rejected his salvation:

He knew about Game. If he had an account on PUAHATE then he knew about game. He was just a denialist. There was no helping this dude.

Roosh seconded this bit of wisdom, seeing it as clear evidence that β€œgame denialism kills.”

Michelin, for his part, hoped that PUAs would be able to use the massacre as a publicity bonanza and a great β€œtold you so” to all the haters.

One should write a mainstream article about this case. The argument that game could have saved lives can be an eye-opener and a smash in the face to haters of game.

Tuthmosis, the man best known for a Return of Kings post on the β€œ5 Reasons to Date a Girl With An Eating Disorder,” reported his joy that PUAhate was getting bad press:

Seeing your enemies fall is a delicious treat you only get to taste a few times in your life. I’m savoring this delicacy with a cup of freshly brewed coffee. It’s a shame real people had to lose their lives, but I can’t help but think this will discredit a horrible website, PUAHate–and a way of thinking–that could have harmed even more men and innocent people. Beta losers will never go away, but this will wake up a few men and, more importantly, scare others.

Zelcorpion blamed β€œgirls” and MGTOWers for giving Rodgers bad dating advice:

I bet a few girls told him that he only needs to be himself, be nice, be a gentleman, have a nice car, looks etc. – only to realize that it mattered shit. Instead of learning from the PUA-community he chose to listen to PUAhaters and some of the anti-female comments of the MGTOWs who themselves are often refusing to accept Game or even basic concepts like Alpha/Beta. I think that problem will become way worse, since hypergamy and promiscuity will only increase and most men will be left in the sexual wasteland.

But it took a relative newcomer to the forum by the handle of thedavidgt to raise the obvious logical objection to the Game-for-everybody solution to incel rage:

If every sexless beta in the world took it upon himself to learn game, approach girls, lift, dress well etc, would it not simply feed women’s egos and entitlement? So instead of occasionally getting awkwardly hit on by skinny fat, poor-dressed chumps, the average 7 would then be approached several times a day by extremely high value men. We’ll have a society of men working to improve themselves for women who will get lazier and lazier while at the same time demanding more and more.

In fact, the β€œGame saves lives” mantra is dead wrong, but not for this reason. First of all, there is no clear evidence that β€œgame,” per se, works, except insofar as it encourages men to pursue large numbers of women and numb them to the pain of rejection. It’s possible that a few of the conversational ploys invented by various PUAs may work better than having no conversational ploys at all. But there are no magic cheat codes to β€œgetting with women.”

There is one more disturbing way in which β€œgame” may increase β€œsuccess” with women for unscrupulous men: many of the standard techniques of β€œgame”– invading a woman’s personal space, touching her repeatedly, trying to β€œisolate” her from her friends – may serve as β€œtests” to find women who are less likely to resist violations of their boundaries. In this way, β€œgame” may serve as a quite effective enabler of date rape. Indeed Roosh himself has admitted to raping a date too drunk to consent.

So how much of a solution is training a guy who is already filled with a toxic mixture of entitlement and self-loathing (yes, these strange bedfellows do often go together) in some techniques that might help him to tamp down his insecurities enough to manipulate some willing or not-so-willing women into bed?

You might have simply turned a mass killer into a serial rapist, or possibly a serial killer. Ted Bundy was quite the charmer. Somehow this didn’t make him a decent human being.

Even if β€œgame” were the beneficient form of β€œself-improvement” that some of its proponents like to claim it is, teaching Rodger how to be a better dater would not make him a better person. Would having a girlfriend solve all his problems? Hardly. Relationships require patience and compromise and mutual respect, and Rodger seems to have had none of these qualities. Instead of directing his narcissistic rage at β€œgirls” at large, he would likely have ended up abusing a string of girlfriends.

The problem wasn’t Rodger’s lack of β€œGame.” It was his lack of humanity.

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Tracy
Tracy
10 years ago

@Marie just saw your sculpture – perfect πŸ™‚ I love that the attack chickens have red eyes.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

If we’re now dumping random things here this is basically the funniest thing I’ve read in ages and you should all read it right now if you need a bit of a pickup after days of reading random guys defend a murderer because omg sad penis is the worst thing ever. Man feels discontented with his girlfriend because she’s a “big girl”, signs up for Fetlife, bullies her into agreeing to an open relationship, and then…

http://www.redditlog.com/snapshots/554905

I know it’s long but read it all, it just keeps getting better and better.

marinerachel
marinerachel
10 years ago

Curvy Kate is on the low quality end of bras in large cup sizes. In HH-K they’re really not very supportive and the fibers they’re made out of give out fast. They make sexy-looking stuff that’s, really, for the floor. It can be fun to wear for a few hours with the intention of undressing and tossing on the floor but, at least in HH thru K cup, they are not super comfortable nor super supportive. They do not last and some of them make the wearer’s boobs a wonky shape.

Best brands for functional and attractive bras in HH-K cup are Panache (and Cleo by Panache, up to J) and Elomi. Panache is by far my favourite. They’re more expensive than Curvy Kate but you get more wear out of them.

I wear each bra twice, then wash in mesh bags, two per bag, on the delicate cycle with Forever New detergent. I try to wear each of my bras before washing to ensure they get equal wear and all last. Some last two years. Six months is normal so I’m doing very well.

I don’t have money but I do spend on shoes and bras because, when you have big breasts, they’re SO important for musculoskeletal reasons.

hellkell
hellkell
10 years ago

cassandra: I read that last week, and guy’s brilliant plan backfired gloriously.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

The best part is where the response was “it’s your own fault, dude, so stop whining” and he was all “you are being very unfair to me!”. Perhaps he, too, will one day come here to tell us his tale of woe.

(And when some of us immediately recognize him for the entitled sexist asshole that he is, we’ll be told we’re being too mean and should cut him more slack because he might be sincere.)

hellkell
hellkell
10 years ago

Wouldn’t want to look like a “click” or mean girl bullies.

kittehserf
10 years ago

cassandrakitty – reading that made my day.

Instant Karma sucks, doesn’t it, dude?

I love the smell of schadenfreude in the morning.

hellkell
hellkell
10 years ago

When I read about this guy on Jezebel, some aggrieved dudebro tried to say that was a woman who wrote the tale, because a guy wouldn’t do that because manly reasons.

kittehserf
10 years ago

Wouldn’t want to look like a β€œclick” or mean girl bullies.

Now available on Amazon We Hunted the Mammoth:

The New Clicker Training: Pavlovian reactions in trolls.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

Denial is the cure for what ails you, if what ails you is reality not going your way.

kittehserf
10 years ago

Buggrit, borked the html. WHTM wasn’t meant to be struck out.

kittehserf
10 years ago

I really love the thought that duder’s girlfriend was finding blokes who actually liked and were attracted to her without any of that too-big-where’s-my-hot-babe-ration shit. Plus the bloke who rubbed it in. Sweet, just sweet.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

I wonder if she’d told the other guy how sneered at she felt by the boyfriend and that was why he decided to twist the knife a bit. I know men who’d do that.

kittehserf
10 years ago

::nods:: I can imagine Mr K doing that.

I hope she drops bf’s sorry ass for good. Hopefully her confidence has taken a real boost from finding that hey, she’s the one people are liking and wanting to date and have sex with, not him, despite all his “you’re not fulfilling sexually [‘cos you’re fat, though I’m not going to say so aloud]” shit.

Luzbelitx
10 years ago

@cassandra

Thank you so much, it’s been refreshing indeed! I’m still laughing…

cloudiah
10 years ago

I <3 Marie's statue so much. Now I'm off to read that redditlog thing.

lurkerina
lurkerina
10 years ago

Both Marie’s statue and the redditlog thing are amazing. Serves the BF right…

I have major back issues due partially to the boulders I’m holding up. I’ve got some exercises I need to do that do help though.

lurkerina
lurkerina
10 years ago

@dustydeste

Here’s the site I usually buy from. Their supplies varies, which is how they have lower prices than most other places. They’ve got two sports bras in 36K

http://www.brastop.com/sports-bras-swimwear#/specFilters=17!#-!68!-#!25m!#-!358&pageSize=24&orderBy=0&pageNumber=1

cloudiah
10 years ago

@lurkerina, What are the exercises, and do they actually help? (Maybe you can’t answer the 2nd question yet.)

dustedeste
dustedeste
10 years ago

@lurkerina:

What exercises do you do? My mom wears a B-cup even after three kids, and my sister has to stuff to fill an A-cup, but I got my dad’s boobs (or, rather, my grandma’s and paternal aunts’), so I have no idea what to do about them, other than commiserate with my sister that we can’t average them out.

I might order that Royce bra, though the Enell one that Unimaginative linked is also a contender; I like that they’ll customize it for you! How handy. And actually they seem to have stores that carry it in my city, so I won’t even have to do a border run for a US postbox! That probably actually seals the deal for Enell πŸ˜€

lurkerina
lurkerina
10 years ago

Ha! International shipping is a pain!

@dustedeste and @cloudiah
they are exercises to strengthen the shoulder muscles that are around your spine. They do help, if you do them regularly (my problem…) My physical therapist ‘prescribed’ them. There’s a bunch of different ones, but the best I’ve notice are laying on a foam roller so your spine is parallel to the roller, than doing ‘angel wings’ slowly, then alternating arms in front of you (like you were rolling your shoulder, but move the whole arm), the upside down ‘flies.’ After you’ve done this every day for awhile, you start adding weights (and other exercises) to continue strengthening. I’ll see if I can find some diagrams or something.

cloudiah
10 years ago

@lurkerina, Thanks much, and additional thanks if you find diagrams!

lurkerina
lurkerina
10 years ago

On this page, the ‘birddog’ and the ‘supermans’ exercises were suggested by my physical therapist in addition to the foam roller ones. http://www.bigbackpain.com/back-exercises-page2.html

This video has the two I described. It doesn’t have the ‘snow angel wings’ but the circles are pretty close:

http://ionosteo.com/foam-roller-exercises-for-back/

I haven’t done any exercises for about two weeks now and I’ve been getting back pain at the end of the day again. πŸ™ Before I went to the physical therapist, it would be all day, every day, so bad that I needed prescription strength muscle relaxers. I just need to remember to do it, even when I’m tired and make time even when I’m busy. It is literally less than 5 minutes a day. And talking to you guys has motivated me! I’m going to do it now!

marinerachel
marinerachel
10 years ago

To keep my spine aligned I have to strength train. My lats have to stay strong to support my boobs. I do cable lat pulldowns and seated cable rows. You can do the exact same exercises with resistance bands though so no expensive equipment or gym membership needed.

I use the foam roller for stretching and working out tension. Love hearing my back crunch and pop when I’m on it.

dustedeste
dustedeste
10 years ago

I’ll have to give those a try! I’m really out of shape, on top of the shoulder boulder issue, and I’ve been meaning to start trying to institute and maintain some kind of exercise regimen for myself. And I did just move into a new apartment complex with a little gym in it, so now’s the time for it πŸ˜€

Besides just general improved fitness, I want to work on my upper body strength (for swords! and armor! also a shield, shields are good), so probably pushups is where it’s at. Though if anyone knows any tips for women looking to up their upper body strength, especially starting from a very low fitness level, that’d be great, though please nothing weight-loss-related (I find it triggering).