W. F. Price of The Spearhead isn’t very happy about my recent suggestion that the Men’s Rights movement encourages abusive ways of thinking towards women. It’s a strange claim for him to make, coming as it is from a guy who presides over one of the most notorious outposts of vicious, virulent misogyny in the Men’s Rights universe. Even stranger is his claim that by opposing violence against women and children I am therefore … supporting policies that lead to more violence against women and children.
It’s going to take a little while to work our way through his convoluted argument. So let’s start at the beginning. Here’s the quote of mine he objects to, from my post the other day about Lundy Bancroft:
[T]he more experience I’ve had with MRAs, the more I’ve begun to see the Men’s Rights Movement not only as an “abusers’ lobby” but as an abusers’ support group, and an abusive force in its own right, promoting forms of “activism” that are little more than semi-organized stalking and harassment of individual women.
It’s not that every MRA is literally a domestic abuser, though I wouldn’t be shocked to find domestic abusers seriously overrepresented in the Men’s Rights ranks; it’s that the Men’s Rights movement promotes abusive ways of thinking and behaving.
This, to Price, is “a calculated slur designed to play to base emotions, and even worse, it’s a damned lie.”
Accusing me of “demonizing fathers,” he argues that the “anti-family policy” he claims I promote “leads to highly elevated rates of domestic violence, rape and child abuse.” He’s especially incensed that I said positive things about Bancroft, who’s an advocate for abused women and (gasp!) actually has a page on his website linking to resources for divorced and divorcing women.
Apparently encouraging women who are being abused to get themselves and their children away from their abusive partner is a terrible, terrible thing in Price’s world.
Futrelle suggests that men who promote patriarchal values, i.e. pro-family values, are more likely to be abusers. But this is not borne out by statistics. In fact, it is quite the opposite. Single mothers are most likely to be battered by sex partners who are not their children’s father, and fatherless children most likely to be murdered, raped and abused.
Yet somehow, fathers’ rights advocates are suspicious, scary people.
David, do you really hate children that much? Do you want to see more women beaten? More children raped and murdered? If so, by all means, support people like Lundy Bancroft, who profit from advocating dissolution resources. Lundy Bancroft is a member in good standing of the divorce industrial complex. He literally lives off misery and destruction of families. I don’t see how anyone could claim to advocate the safety of women and children while promoting a self-interested, home-wrecking charlatan like Bancroft.
It is immoral, it is evil, and it hurts innocent people. How, David, can you defend that?
Woah, calm down there, fella!
Very little of Price’s rant has anything to do with anything I actually wrote. I said nothing in my post about the Men’s Rights movement promoting patriarchal or “pro-family” values. Fact is, while some more traditional MRAs do advocate patriarchy, you’re far more likely to run across MRAs denouncing marriage as a deadly trap and demanding the supposed right of “legal paternal surrender” – that is, the right for fathers to abandon all financial responsibilities towards children they don’t want.
I also said nothing about divorce, though, yeah, I’m pretty sure it’s a good idea when you’re married to an abuser. And it’s a good idea a lot of other times. While divorce is almost always painful to everyone involved, I don’t know a lot of divorced people who actually regret their decision to divorce.
That said, if Price thinks that patriarchal “pro-family” values are somehow a magical deterrent to divorce, he’s simply wrong. In fact, divorce rates are considerably higher in the Red State south than in the Blue State Northeast, in part because an excess of “family values” in the South means that couples are pressured to marry young, and people who marry young are the most likely to divorce.
You’d think Price would know that patriarchal values aren’t an antidote to divorce; after all, he’s as patriarchal as they come, and he’s on his second marriage.
In any case, what I did say, and have said, about the Men’s Rights movement is that it promotes misogynistic, hateful, and abusive thinking about women. For countless examples of this one need look no further than Price’s own blog.
Indeed, in the comments to this very post of his, several Spearheaders lash out against women with crude, misogynistic insults.
Verve announces that he’s Going His Own Way – and apparently that also includes his spelling of the word “voila.”
Take women out of your life- Wa-La! Magically 98% of the stress and problems they cause that lead to anger and the insane laws that have men go to jail for nothing- all gone!
Troll King, meanwhile, is in so much of a rush to get his opinion down that he doesn’t even bother to finish typing the final word – I can only presume it is “civilization.”
I know there are horrible men, but we all also know that women destroy civi.
But it is Höllenhund who wins the Misogyny Sweepstakes with his attack on single mothers:
Women are largely unfit to be effective parents, so the children they end up raising alone are pretty much a lost cause. Either they’ll end up dead, as you mention, or end up as whipped, psychologically damaged beta white knights, ghetto-dwelling alpha thugs or carouseling sluts if they’re born female. They are already contaminated by the sinfulness and pathology of their POS mothers.
These are all from one post — a post designed to refute my claim, backed up with hundreds of blog posts’ worth of evidence — that the Men’s Rights movement is rife with misogyny and abusive thinking about women.
Going back through my older posts about The Spearhead, I found too many examples of really foul misogyny to post. Here are just a few:
A little Fathers’ Day death threat from Jeremiah MRA, which got more upvotes than downvotes from the Spearheaders:
If a woman was being problematic and tried to keep my children from me, I’d do one of two things: refuse to see the kids and refuse all support, or end the problem once and for all.
Greyghost, fantasizing about how the collapse of civilization would force women to turn once again to strong men for protection:
Next to a dog female fear is a mans best friend. Fearful insecure women tend to be more polite and pleasant to those around her.
Ck, declaring that women are “feral creatures” who love to be abused by “thugs.”
[W]omen are at best amoral beings and at worst imoral. I no longer look at a women and hope they may be the one who vaules a decent, kind, moral man. Instead I see a feral creature who wants to be thugf#$cked and used. They are addicted to a drug called emotion. They want the highs of being thugf#cked and the coming lows of being used and dumped. Then rinse and repeat.
Darryl X suggesting that all women are whores:
Women are not women today. They are whores. Big difference.
Whores, that is, who should be forced to live in caves:
Since the solution for the past forty-four years was to kill and impoverish and exile and imprison men and steal their kids, I’d say sending women to live in a cave is a generous trade.
And let’s just finish off this little parade of abusive misogyny for now with Towgunner, complaining how unfair it is for a man like him to be considered “equal” to the spiteful creature that is woman:
The women’s world is here, they do things not out of practical necessity but out of spite, Mother’s Day comes and they bemoan house wives, Father’s day comes and they point out that some men are staying home. There is nothing practical here, there is spite, there is insult, and there is hubris. I don’t admire women, I don’t ever want to be one either, there is nothing noble about them. In fact I find it an insult to be called “equal” to them at all.
Now, I have no evidence that any of these men are themselves abusers of women.
But is there evidence that beliefs like this can lead to abuse? As a matter of fact, there is. A 2002 meta-review of 39 studies found that various aspects of “masculine ideology” were clearly tied to sexual aggression in men. The authors wrote:
In feminist sociocultural models of rape, extreme adherence to the masculine gender role is implicated in the perpetuation of sexual assault against women in that it encourages men to be dominant and aggressive, and it teaches that women are inferior to men and are sometimes worthy of victimization. Many researchers have linked components of masculine ideology to self-reports of past sexual aggression or future likelihood to rape. Thirty-nine effect sizes were examined in this meta-analysis across 11 different measures of masculine ideology to determine how strongly each index of masculine ideology was associated with sexual aggression. Although 10 of the 11 effect sizes were statistically significant, the 2 largest effects were for Malamuth’s construct of “hostile masculinity”… and Mosher’s construct of “hypermasculinity” … both of which measure multiple components of masculine ideology including acceptance of aggression against women and negative, hostile beliefs about women. The next strongest relationships concerned measures of agreement that men are dominant over women and measures of hostility toward women.
Emphasis mine.
Let’s look at the two forms of “masculine ideology” that have the highest correlations with sexual aggression. “Hypermasculinity” is essentially traditional machismo, laced with sexism. While one finds a good deal of macho posturing in the Men’s Rights movement, there are plenty of MRAs who don’t fit this stereotype.
What about “hostile masculinity?” The researchers describe it as a combination of
1) a desire to be in control, to be dominating, particularly in relation to women, and 2) an insecure, defensive, and distrustful orientation to women.
Does that sound just a little bit familiar?
It’s more or less a description of half of the MRAs out there, and probably the overwhelming majority of the commenters on The Spearhead.
Of course, the Spearheaders don’t express hostility only towards women. They also express hostility towards men who don’t hate women sufficiently. In the comments to Price’s post declaring me a father-demonizing mother and child-hater, the regulars attack me, variously, as “slimy,” “a bottom feeder,” “evil,” and “a sleazy predator in disguise” who is “too repulsive to even get into proximity of any young women.”
But it’s the rape jokes/threats that are the most charming, from Troll King’s PS at the end of one comment:
PS. FUck mantits. I still wanna titty fuck that little cunt. I bet they are nice and soft…nohomo…
To Judo-chop’s fond recollection of a rape threat from the past:
The best was that troll a couple years back who wished Manboobz would get anally raped. LOL. Futrelle totally lost it when he heard that.
Actually, the most recent anal rape “wish” was just a couple of months ago.
Pro-tip: If you want to prove to the world how totally non-abusive you guys are, you’re doing it wrong.
@weirwoodtreehugger:
I’ve also heard the argument that women basically forced dudes to build civilization; left to their own devices men would’ve preferred to hang out in the caves eating mammoth tartare and scratching things that needed scratched and, generally, living in harmony with nature.
But nooooo, women nagged/social-engineered/golddug/creepshamed our collective way into making the poor exhausted men invent agriculture, nuclear warfare, antibiotics, designer handbags, bon-bons, and the TCP/IP protocol, unleashing tremendous environmental degradation and overpopulation in our thoughtless, solipsistic, Team Woman wake. It’s just our nature, you know.
Now they’d just like to take about the next 5,000 years off from doing our bidding; is that so much to ask?
It’s not women, it’s guys like those and their ideology that destroys anything that even remotely resembles civilization. If those were an isolated case they would be funny or entertaining, but knowing that this has happened and continues to happen in some parts of the world like the Taliban regime and such causing so much pain and suffering to so many people, and not just to women, but to every living thing, it just makes me really sad.
Citations needed.
But are these sex partners of single mothers also promoters of patriarchal values? Do you even know, WTF? Are single mothers more likely to be victims of abusers than both married women and single women who are not mothers?
Where are all the studies, producing all these statistics, WTF? Or are you just producing assfax?
Unless science has advanced considerably further than I’d noticed, there are no fatherless children. Do you mean children with absent fathers, by any chance? And your claims of doom for these children – citations needed. In particular, citations need that the men doing the murdering, raping and abusing are not, in fact, men who promote patriarchal values.
Because otherwise this is just a load of unsupported propaganda spouting straight from your ass!
My step-dad has calmed down and apologized, and he’s not going to kick me out. I’m still going to leave soon, though, and live with some friends of mine. I really need to live away from family for a while, and living with friends may provide some opportunity for personal growth.
BTW, Dave, here’s the link to that meta-analysis you cited in your post: http://taasa.org/library/pdfs/TAASALibrary76.pdf (it’s the whole article, not just the abstract)
David*
I know a lot of Daves and Davids, sorry. X_X
Not surprisingly MRAs tend to fail at interpreting research. Children in single parent households are statistically more likely to have behavioral, emotional and academic problems than children from two parent households.
Of course, a statistically significant difference mean just that. It does not mean all children from single parent households have major problems. It also doesn’t mean that no children of two parent households have major problems. Nor does it mean that insulting and belittling single mothers and their kids will magically put an end to single parent households.
If single parenting and feminism is causing western civilization to collapse than why have crime rates in the western world fallen sharply in the last few decades?
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2373754/Crime-fallen-70-major-global-cities-despite-economic-crisis-rising-unemployment.html
I just realized the article was from the Daily Mail which I know is dubious. They did cite their sources though so hopefully it holds up!
These people are so far removed from reality it is laughable. They are never going to come close to accomplishing anything in the real world. They are nothing but failures. And Price is still seething that his first wife was able to leave him for another man and he was powerless to stop it or “get even” by depriving her of her maternal rights or child support.
Reverend Wiley advised me not to divorce him
for the sake of the children,
and Judge Somers advised him the same.
So we stuck to the end of the path.
But two of the children thought he was right,
and two of the children thought I was right.
And the two who sided with him blamed me,
and the two who sided with me blamed him,
and they grieved for the one they sided with.
And all were torn with the guilt of judging,
and tortured in soul because they could not admire
equally him and me.
Now every gardener knows that plants grown in cellars
or under stones are twisted and yellow and weak.
And no mother would let her baby suck
diseased milk from her breast.
Yet preachers and judges advise the raising of souls
where there is no sunlight but only twilight,
No warmth, but only dampness and cold –
preachers and judges!
“Mrs. Charles Bliss” by Edgar Lee Masters, 1915
The whole MRA/PUA movement boils down to the fact that these men are angry that women have sexual, political, and social agency and no longer require to trade their sexual favors for food, shelter, and protection. Because clearly these men have NOTHING to offer a mate besides food, shelter, or protection from the violence of other men.
Notice how many of their arguments (or fantasies) boil down to:
1. Women don’t have agency because…(insert misogyny) OR
2. I can’t wait until shit hits the fan so I women will be begging to suck my c*ck in exchange for food and I can laugh at them and say “die b!tches! lolololz”
3. I can’t wait until these superficial b!tches who won’t sleep with me hit the wall and come begging for my paycheck and sperm and I can laugh at them and say “die b!tches! lolololz”
@auggziliary: I was thinking they were mixing divorce and “military industrial complex”. Which makes even less sense. XD
No, actually in this case it’s 100% correct. Crime and violence are on a steady decline throughout the whole western world and every source confirms it.
http://www.economist.com/news/leaders/21582004-crime-plunging-rich-world-keep-it-down-governments-should-focus-prevention-not
Feminism is causing a collapse of civilization only in the minds of those people and noone else, in fact the opposite is true, with very few exceptions you can basically measure socio-economic development by gender and other types of equality throuought the world and just couldn’t be otherwise when you think about it, you can’t have a positive development or sustainable civilization by excluding atleast half of your population.
i’m pretty sure by feminism causing “the collapse of civilization” they mean that the only civilization that “counts” is one that fits their bigoted, narrow view. :/
It’s funny because from everything I’ve read about paleolithic culture, it was much more collaborative than post agricultural culture.
I know that in dystopia stories when civilization collapses people always become intensely violent and competitive and the advantage goes to macho alpha males. But in real life, if we something happened to revert us to hunter gather life, I’m not so sure it would be like the movies. When resources are very scarce, it is actually more advantageous to collaborate than it is to compete.
Of course, as we’ve seen from Random Pester; denizens of the manosphere believe everything they see in pop culture. And they think women are shallow!
AllyS
I know how it feels to have a stepdad who’s a total asshole. Mine tried to strangle me and threatened to ‘cut my tits off.’ Stay safe and do your best to get out of there. Isn’t there a shelter you can go to?
David
I saw the Price rant yesterday. What a knobhead.
and these idiots are offended/shocked/surprised women avoid them when the sprout this crap
I guess that should have been “spout”
Remember how I mentioned I have no respect for the MRM because it only uses survivors like me as beating sticks on feminism?
Yeah, good example.
Mr Futrelle, I have enjoyed your work for a long time. I don’t really like to comment on pages, but I wanted to say you’ve been making some exceptional posts recently. Your logical rebuttals have been dead on and your research has been thorough and well applied.
The psychologists, sociologists and other scientists of the world have spoken- these mentalities and patterns of behavior are harmful to both genders and are ultimately preventable through education. Keep hitting the MRA’s there- sunlight is said to be the best of disinfectants.
Speaking of the etiology of male violence against women, here’s an article that is super useful and has a bunch of interesting studies on the subject (and a lot of them are accessible for free): http://jfderry.wordpress.com/2012/09/01/rape-jokes-are-dangerous/
Ally S, is there anything we can do to help?
David – actually they are right that ‘patriarchal values’ reduce divorce, because under ‘patriarchal values’ a woman is her husband’s property and has no right to divorce him, whereas if he gets tired of her he can abandon or kill her. Therefore divorce rates go down, QED.
Misery is an abstract concept, and therefore incapable of sustaining life as we know it; as long as we’re being literal here.
He didn’t finish there. He was going to say “civil engineers”. We all also know that women destroy civil engineers. Do any of you know a civil engineer? No? Because women destroy them all. Yes? That just means that the women haven’t destroyed them yet.
And where is Price’s “feminist” wife in all this? Because last time I looked, feminism is NOT about being silent when the abusers’ lobby tries to deflect the blame onto those who are outspoken AGAINST “fathers’ rights” abuse.
(Also, I’m noting that this comes right on the eve of Mother’s Day. Smooth move, Ex-Lax.)
Also, isn’t Mr. Price a divorced man himself? Glass houses, bub…