Thought Catalog – which seems to be rapidly becoming the go-to site for terrible antifeminist posts – is making a bit of a stir on Reddit with a post bearing the deliberately provocative title “Wait A Second, Did Amy Schumer Rape a Guy?” Spoiler Alert: The anonymous author concludes that yes, she did. The anonymous author is full of shit.
In the Thought Catalog piece, Anonymous takes a look at a speech that Schumer – a comedian with some subversive feminist leanings — recently gave at the Gloria Awards and Gala, hosted by the Ms. Foundation for Women. The centerpiece of Schumer’s speech, a bittersweet celebration of confidence regained, was a long and cringeworthy story about a regrettable sexual encounter she had in her Freshman year of college, when her self-esteem was at an all-time low.
The short version of the story: A guy named Matt, whom Schumer had a giant crush on, called her at 8 AM for a booty call, after he apparently had been turned down by every other woman in his little black book. Amy, thinking she was being invited for an all-day-date, only discovered his real intent when she got to his dorm room and he romantically drunkenly pushed her onto the bed and started fingering her.
After several failed attempts at intercourse, and what she describes as an “ambitious” attempt to go down on her, he finally gave up and fell asleep on top of her. Lying there listening to Sam Cooke, she decided she didn’t want to be “this girl” any more, “waited until the last perfect note floated out, and escaped from under him and out the door.”
Looking back on the incident, she thanks her failed lover for introducing her “to my new self, a girl who got her value from within her.”
But Thought Catalog’s anonymous author, noting the extreme drunkenness of Schumer’s stumbling lover, concludes that “Amy’s actions may have constituted as rape in the eyes of her college, Towson University.” (Or at least according to the school’s current policies.)
Anonymous quotes Towson’s current policy on sexual harassment, which states:
In order to give effective Consent, one must not be mentally or physical incapacitated (e.g., by alcohol or drugs, unconsciousness, mental disability).
And adds:
It’s hard to argue that Matt was not mentally incapacitated. In Amy’s words, he was “wasted.”
Actually, the fact that Matt wasn’t too intoxicated to initiate an assortment of sexual acts with her — or to get up and change the music at her request — suggests that he wasn’t “mentally incapacitated,” at least by the standards used by colleges when investigating alleged sexual assaults. The Association of Title IX Administrators’ Gender-Based and Sexual Misconduct Model Policy (which sets an unofficial standard for college administrators) defines incapacitation as “a state where someone cannot make rational, reasonable decisions because they lack the capacity to give knowing consent (e.g., to understand the ‘who, what, when, where, why or how’ of their sexual interaction).”
In any case, it’s not clear why Anonymous is looking at Towson’s sexual harassment policy, which is designed to deal with “non-consensual Sexual Contact, Sexual Exploitation, or requests for sexual favors that affect educational or employment decisions,” and which clearly doesn’t apply to Schumer’s story.
As for sexual assault, the school’s official web site states:
Sexual assault is defined by Towson University as forcible sexual intercourse, sexual penetration–however slight–of another person’s genital or anal opening with any object, sodomy, or any unwanted touching of an unwilling person’s intimate parts or forcing an unwilling person to touch another’s intimate parts. Under this definition, these acts must be committed either by force, threat, intimidation, or through the use of the victim’s mental or physical helplessness, of which the accuser was or should have been aware. This includes, but is not limited to, victim helplessness resulting from intoxication or from the taking of a so-called “date-rape drug.”
This definition is drawn from the University of Maryland System Policy on Sexual Assault, which classifies sexual assault involving penetration — the traditional definition of rape — as a more serious type of sexual assault (Sexual Assault I) than those forms of sexual assault involving touching (Sexual Assault II). By this standard, assuming we equate Sexual Assault I with rape, Schumer clearly did not rape him.
Anonymous then looks at Maryland’s state laws and concludes:
In the eyes of Maryland state law, things get a bit more complicated. Amy could be guilty of rape or sexual assault depending on whether or not penetration was achieved. According to the state law, a person may not engage in vaginal intercourse with another “if the victim is a mentally defective individual, a mentally incapacitated individual, or a physically helpless individual, and the person performing the act knows or reasonably should know that the victim is a mentally defective individual, a mentally incapacitated individual, or a physically helpless individual.” Legally, it’s hard to argue that it wasn’t rape, at least given the details in Amy’s speech.
Well, actually, yes it is. And not just legally, but by any reasonable definition of the word “rape.”
Because Schumer, at least by her account, wasn’t “the person performing the act.” He was. She was lying there wondering what had gone wrong with her life.
If you read the speech in its entirety, instead of depending on the selective quotations in the Thought Catalog post, this is abundantly clear. As she describes it, he:
Pushes her down on the bed; as she writes, he does “that sexy maneuver where the guy pushes you on the bed, you know, like, ‘I’m taking the wheel on this one. Now I’m going to blow your mind. …’”
Penetrates her with his fingers; as she writes, “[h]is fingers poked inside me like they had lost their keys in there.”
Tries to have intercourse, though his penis is only half-willing; she describes him as “pushing aggressively into my thigh, and during this failed penetration, I looked around the room to try and distract myself or God willing, disassociate.” Even using the “made to penetrate” standard, she’s not raping him, because she’s not making him do anything; he’s the active one.
Goes down on her.
Attempts intercourse again; this time, “[o]n his fourth thrust, he gave up and fell asleep on my breast.”
At no point in Schumer’s story does she describe herself as initiating anything. Indeed, she spends much of the time thinking to herself how much she wants to leave.
He started to go down on me. That’s ambitious, I think. Is it still considered getting head if the guy falls asleep every three seconds and moves his tongue like an elderly person eating their last oatmeal? … Is it? Yes? It is. I want to scream for myself, “Get out of here, Amy. You are beautiful, you are smart, and worth more than this. This is not where you stay.”
If a woman initiates sex with a man who is too drunk to consent, that’s rape. But a woman lying motionless trying to dissociate while a man tries to penetrate her is not a rapist. Even if he is drunk.
And that’s the case no matter how you switch the genders up.
Of course that’s not how they see things on Reddit, where most of those who’ve commented on the story have been quick to agree with the Thought Catalog author that Schumer raped her partner. Ironically, it’s been those outside the Men’s Rights subreddit who have been the most outspoken on this point. In TwoXChromosomes, a subreddit ostensibly devoted to women but in fact overrun with MRAs and other antifeminists, someone calling herself Shield_Maiden831 has gotten more than 200 net upvotes for a comment concluding that “[i]f you really believe in equality, then it seems to be a clear cut case from her own admission.”
Not everyone agrees. Elsewhere in TwoX , one commenter by the name of critropolitan argues, I think quite cogently, that
Unless the full transcript reveals something that the quotes in the article don’t, it doesn’t seem like Schumer exploited this guys mental state to do something to him that violated his will.
He was the one who called her.
He was the one who acted every step of the way and she went along with it.
Assuming that a person who is drunk is, automatically, in virtue of being drunk, without agency, is a mistake. It is moreover a mistake only made with regard to sex – no one thinks the same with regard to bar fights or the choice to drive. Drunken sex might not be the platonic ideal of sex, but it is not automatically rape in every case regardless of the actual state of minds, wishes, and feelings of the participants. …
There is no suggestion that Amy engaged in any sexual contact with this guy while he was passed out, or that she did something he didn’t want to do but he simply lacked the capacity to effectively resist or communicate non consent. Instead he was drunk enough to show significant signs of drunkeness, but not so drunk that he couldn’t not only communicate effectively but take a sexual initiative.
Rapists can exploit the vulnerability of drunk people, but we must walk back from the bizarre and agency-denying position that all drunk sex is rape. Rape is far too serious a matter for this bullshit.
It is.
But of course the MRAs and antifeminists on Reddit now accusing Schumer of rape aren’t interested in taking rape seriously. Indeed, if we look back on how they regularly talk about rape and issues of consent, it’s clearly they’re interested in taking rape less seriously. Their main interest in this case is as a supposed “gotcha” of a prominent female comedian with feminist leanings. In the process they are slandering her, and trivializing the real issue of rape.
@David damn, I had hopes for the FemRA Debates sub. I’ve had some interesting and reasoned discussions there, but haven’t been there in awhile.
girlscientist, I loved your history of the hoor!
Hi Anna, has someone offered you a welcome package?
You may be right that he was too drunk to consent properly. In an ideal world, Amy would have had the self-confidence to leave and not allow him to try to use her as a fuck-doll. But that’s the key thing which the MRAs are missing here. He used her. She was passive in all of this.
How quickly would I have grasped that my crush was possibly too drunk to give meaningful consent? While he was trying to penetrate? While he was trying to give oral? While he was trying to penetrate again? While I was trying to deal with the rush of embarrassment and confusion and need and disappointment? I don’t know but expecting a young woman in that scenario to grasp that the consent that she was getting from the man trying his level best to have sex with her was possibly impaired at the same time? And get her act together enough to leave?
I wish she had. I bet Any wishes she had. But it’s a bit of a high requirement, especially in a society that tries not to talk about consent at all and instead likes to fill young women with as much self-doubt as possible. And given that the man in question was indicating enthusiastic consent.
Should we be giving young women and young men the tools and understanding to recognise and cope with situations like this? Hell yes.
If Amy had sat & watched that man get drunk, and helped him get drunker, and then taken him back to his place in a wasted state with the intent to have sex with him, should I be looking at this differently? Or even had realised his drunkeness on her way over to his room? Hell, yes.
So yep, I think I get where you’re coming from, Anna, but you might want to use a little less “should” and a little more explanation.
And I hope, Anna, that I hit the tone right there? I’m trying to say I think you might have interesting points to make but that your short and slightly dogmatic comment doesn’t give us the chance to explore them.
Thanks, kittehserf!
Having read the speech in full, it really doesn’t sound like he was too drunk to consent, because he was:
a) coherent – coherent enough that he could call Amy and ask her to come over without her realising that he was drunk.
b) cognizant – he knew who he was with, where he was and what was going on. He was aware of his surroundings, enough so to be able to put on a CD and then change it on request. He was also initiating all the sexual activity – poor execution doesn’t mean he didn’t know what he wanted or what he was doing.
c) conscious – the only times during this encounter where it sounds like he may not have been conscious was when she describes him as falling asleep every three seconds while trying to give her head, and again when he passes out on her breast after changing the CD. The only time Amy could possibly have been raping him is in the short stretches when he dozed off with his face in her vagina.
I think it’s fair to say that if you realise your partner has fallen asleep during sex, you should absolutely stop what you’re doing. But the idea that you become a rapist if the person you’re having sex with falls asleep while still in contact with your naked body… that’s just absurd. It basically means naked people can never share beds. Like, imagine my partner falls asleep in my lap while we’re watching a movie together after having sex – should I shove him off me immediately to make sure it’s not sexual assault?
And I’m with titianblue in that Amy regretted not leaving earlier – she says in the speech that she wanted to scream for herself to get out of there. In fact, the whole point of the speech is that she made some very poor choices as an 18/19 year-old. But, as the misters are so fond of reminding us, regret ≠ rape and poor choices ≠ rape. Lack of consent = rape, and nothing back the story indicates that the dude did not want to be there or did not understand what was going on.
Hey, I just realized Amy’s story is actually an example of a woman who regrets having sex and is not “crying rape”.
Way to miss the point, Thought Catalog Anonymous
Luzbelitx – from what I’ve seen, Thought Catalog is all about missing the point.
All the excuses here are DISGUSTING.
“But that’s the key thing which the MRAs are missing here. He used her. She was passive in all of this.”
SHE STILL HAS AN OBLIGATION TO SAY NO.
If you say YES to the advances of a drunk person, YOU ARE RAPING THEM.
It’s NOT complicated, as the users here have pointed out, even Austin Powers knew this.
““you’re drunk; it wouldn’t be right.”
Quit making excuses, “She was a passive participant” Yes, PARTICIPANT. She came inside, got in the bed, continued to allow him to drunkenly attempt to have sex, and then MOCKED him for it.
She walked in the door KNOWING she wanted sex.
“”Probably. But I was here, and I wanted to be held and touched and felt desired, despite everything. I wanted to be with him. “”
That’s fucking creepy, and very much rape. The fact that Feminists are making excuses for this behavior is terrifying, and really shows exactly how much you care what happens when men are taken advantage of.
Ah, touché
She’d be legally responsible for sexual assault in my country (which doesn’t have penetration-based subdivisions), and I am glad that is the case.
She recognized that he was in a state which a reasonable person would recognize as incapable of consent when she opened the door. She was very clear about that. She did nothing to prevent an obviously mentally incapacitated person from having sex.
Most of the people in FeMRAdebates arguing that this is rape are doing so in good faith. Many are feminists. Many are ex-feminists with good reason. You are getting severely down voted because you are genuinely being perceived as a rape apologist.
I genuinely believe your position makes you a rape apologist, because this is obviously sexual contact without consent, and indefensible.
@Male Victim of Sexual Assault
Are you saying nobody can have sex while drunk? I’m… really confused.
As am I.
Shaed, are you saying in your country that drunk sex is illegal?
“Many are ex-feminists with good reason.”
See, I believed you about the good faith, right up to there.
Male victim of sexual assault:
I was in a bar once and as I tried to pay my tab a drunk guy on a bar stool wrapped his legs around me and tried to make me kiss him. I had to smile and pretend not to want to kick his drunk ass because he had a hold of me and if I pissed him off, I might have gotten hurt and/or arrested for getting in a bar fight. He didn’t get that kiss because I was pushing him away and saying, “No” while trying to seem non-threatening and happy. Another woman in my place might have just let him kiss her to get away. That event was so triggering to me that I sobbed when I left.
Are you telling me I sexually assaulted him? If I’d have let him kiss me, would I have been sexually assaulting him?
No, when she went there she didn’t know he was drunk. (I’ve known drunks with the uncanny ability to sound fine on the phone, then you get there and they are blotto.)
No, when she went in, she did not know he’d become sexually aggressive. He was the one throwing her on his bed, pushing his fingers inside of her and trying to initiate other acts after that. She did not want, ask for or enjoy what he did to her. “Not no” isn’t “Yes”. It sounds like she didn’t consent so much as just give in. She did not try to use him while he was incapacitated. She was first stunned and hurt and then outta there.
You know, when a woman is isolated with a sexually aggressive, drunk man, she does not know what he is going to do if she says “No”. Please don’t pretend that everyone having this discussion doesn’t know that.
@Male victim
oh wowowowowowow.
He was obviously aware enough to know what was going on, who he was trying to have sex with. Every advance was made by him. The only thing she did was not refuse his advance which is not rape. FFS.
@sparky
Seconding that question, cuz like… wtf?
And Lea did a much better job responding to those comments than I could.
^Yes. And that’s something Male Victim and Shaed really don’t seem to get :/
Figures that MRAs would eventually get to the point where they’re arguing that if a woman is sexually assaulted by a man who’s been drinking then she’s actually raping him.
This article by David and the commenter that support his fumbling attempt at an argument are some of the mock worthy things I’ve ever seen. But hey, at least you got a page hit!
Thanks for the laughs, kiddos.
Well, now that you’re entertained, my life has meaning…not! And banning alcohol never works. Just look at American Prohibition, which in case you don’t know, created the American Mafia.
@randomposter
…??? who is talking about banning alchohol.
I sure hope it’s drinking time where he is, because if his thought processes are this much of a mess when he’s sober I kind of feel bad for him.
(Or, you know, I would if he wasn’t an asshole.)
We’ve covered this, and no. Did you even read her speech?
It’s just a wee bit hard to buy this sudden concern the MRAs have for this classmate of Amy Schumer’s considering they never, ever believe any woman who says she is raped.
I guess a blacked out unconscious woman who is raped just regrets bad sex and what did she expect being alone with a guy but a drunk yet still conscious man pushes a woman down on the bed and she’s stuck under him the woman is a rapist!
That makes sense.
It kind of plays into this idea that you can “accidentally” rape someone, that what happens is that a person regrets the sex after sobering up and “cries rape.” It’s bullshit. It’s an attempt to muddy the waters in regards to consent, to make consent seem difficult and complicated when it’s really not. Rapists utilize alcohol to incapacitate their victims and they know exactly what they’re doing when they do so.
Is it my imagination or are their attempted gotchas getting increasingly desperate and full of fail over time?