Professional antifeminist Phyllis Schlafly – perhaps best known for her fervent opposition to the Equal Rights Amendment – seems to have been channeling the manosphere in a column she published yesterday on the issue of “paycheck fairness.” Turns out she thinks such fairness is actually a bad idea, because ladies love marrying rich guys more than they love earning money.
According to Schlafly, equal pay messes with the fundamental female desire for “hypergamy” – that favorite manosphere buzzword – and undermines marriage:
[H]ypergamy … means that women typically choose a mate (husband or boyfriend) who earns more than she does. Men don’t have the same preference for a higher-earning mate.
While women prefer to HAVE a higher-earning partner, men generally prefer to BE the higher-earning partner in a relationship. This simple but profound difference between the sexes has powerful consequences for the so-called pay gap.
Suppose the pay gap between men and women were magically eliminated. If that happened, simple arithmetic suggests that half of women would be unable to find what they regard as a suitable mate.
Indeed, Schlafly argues, women love marrying men who earn more than them so much that when the pay gap is eliminated some of them just won’t marry at all. Which is apparently the end of the world, or something.
The pay gap between men and women is not all bad because it helps to promote and sustain marriages. …
In two segments of our population, the pay gap has virtually ceased to exist. In the African-American community and in the millennial generation (ages 18 to 32), women earn about the same as men, if not more.
It just so happens that those are the two segments of our population in which the rate of marriage has fallen the most. Fifty years ago, about 80 percent of Americans were married by age 30; today, less than 50 percent are.
So it’s not enough that most people end up getting married; civilization will crumble if more than half of them don’t marry before the age of 30!
And so, she suggests, if American women knew what was good for them they would be begging for employers pay them even less, relative to men.
The best way to improve economic prospects for women is to improve job prospects for the men in their lives, even if that means increasing the so-called pay gap.
Hmm. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I’m pretty sure that Schlafly – a best-selling author and popular speaker on the right – didn’t send back any of her royalties or speaking fees so that she would feel more like a woman and her late husband would feel like more of a man, and I doubt she’s doing so now, as a widow. She’s also been unmarried for more than twenty years. Coincidence?
NOTE TO MEN’S RIGHTS ACTIVISTS: When you find yourself agreeing with Phyllis Schlafly on pretty much anything (beyond, say, the existence of gravity, the need for human beings to breathe air, and other widely accepted beliefs of this sort), this is an indication that perhaps your movement isn’t the progressive, egalitarian movement that you like to pretend that it is, and that in fact it is sort of the opposite.
That said, I should also note that Schlafly’s notion of “hypergamy,” while sexist and silly, is decidedly less obnoxious than the version peddled by PUAs and websites like A Voice for Men — congrats, Men’s Human Rights Activists, you’re actually worse than Phyllis Schlafly!
She just uses the term to indicate a desire to marry up. For many manospherians, by contrast, “hypergamy” doesn’t just mean marrying up; it means that women are fickle, unfaithful monsters who love nothing better than cuckolding beta males in order to jump into bed with whatever alpha male wanders into their field of vision. (I’m guessing Schlafly hasn’t actually been going through the archives at AVFM or Chateau Heartiste looking for column ideas.) While many MRAs love to complain about hypergamy, many of them also seem to think that it’s unfair that “beta” males with good jobs aren’t automatically entitled to hot wives.
In case anyone is wondering, the actual definition of the word “hypergamy” involves none of that. According to Random House Kernerman Webster’s College Dictionary, the word means “marriage to a person of a social status higher than one’s own; orig., esp. in India, the custom of allowing a woman to marry only into her own or a higher social group.”
That’s it. It refers to the fact of marrying up, not to the desire to marry up, much less to the alleged desire of all twentysomething women to ride the Alpha Asshole Cock Carousel. The manosphere’s new and not-so-improved definition came from a white nationalist named F. Roger Devlin.
ANOTHER NOTE: Big thanks to the people who emailed me about this story. If you ever see something you think would make for a good Man Boobz post, send me an email at futrelle [at] manboobz.com. I get a lot of ideas from tips!
So Pinky… I’m gonna guess you feel a bit swamped, even abused. Them’s the breaks. I you want to be taken seriously you have accept it. You are in the unpleasant position of being the contrarian, and that means a lot of people (some with longstanding opinions, often honed in previous encounters with other contrarians, some of whom are/were assholes).
You have a couple of options; accept it, as the normal course of events it is; and take some time to read, digest, and respond to the arguments made. That’s the best course, and the one which leads to sleeping well at night (trust me, I’ve been there).
You could, of course, continue in the Socratic way you have been: insisting you are merely seeking truth, pursuing accuracy, and “asking questions”. You are likely to get the same sort of response he did, and (as with him) deservedly so.
You could get all sniffy about how you have been piled on, and are outnumbered. That’s gonna get you snarked. You knew these opinions weren’t going to be well received. You chose to make them. The predictable response is that lots of people will tell you whey they disagree. Some will be more gentle than others (and some will bury their barbs in polite language, with subtle insult). Some will call you an idiot directly. Some will hold you up to ridicule with the tools of farce.
And all of it is fair.
There is another course of action open to you, one which has a long, if somewhat less than laudatory lineage, you could have a meltdown, and explode into frothing rage about how mean we are all, and what vicious harpies we must be; whom no one loves, and so we will die alone, unloved, and unsung (with our cats).
If you do choose the last option, be aware you will be judged, and graded, on the performance. A strong showing can be obtained by original use of insult, some sign you have analysed the crowd to find appropriate targets; and tailored the meltdown accordingly, so the abuse is matched to the subject. Otherwise brilliant efforts can be undercut by not knowing when it’s time to bow out.
It should go without saying (but sad experience has taught us many things which ought not need saying are, regrettably, not being instructed in the schools) that any declaration of departure must be final. Any return after a flounce (no matter how deftly worded, and skillfully the execution appears at the time) will result in a negative score from the judges (even the French and E. German ones).
auugzillary: Why in the world would you want men and women to be judged on the same physical standards?
So one can create tests for things like firefighting, police work, military specialities, etc. which women can’t pass; and so, “fairly” exclude them from participation.
and now I have to hie me away to work.
I had a really long post written to address Pinky Pie here, but everyone else phrased their responses so much more eloquently, so I’ll just leave this here:
Pinky, women and feminists don’t owe you anything, not explanations, not replies, not nice treatment, not kisses on your hurt manly fee-fee boo-boos. Being male doesn’t grant you freedom from criticism for the things that come out of your mouth or from your keyboard. Nobody is required to be nice to you if you come barging in to announce your misinformed opinions all over the place. Instead of vehemently arguing for or against something that you don’t really understand, take a step back, take a deep breath and try really listening or reading what the people you’re arguing against are actually saying, instead of deciding what you think they’re saying in advance and arguing from there.
It’s hilarious that Pinky’s upset about us putting false words in his mouth and is all “I like accurary” when he said this:
and then we looked at what she actually said and it wasn’t that at all.
Also, I was willing to give him some “youth slack” but that comparing feminism to white nationalism was pretty beyond the pale. I just hope he someday realizes that the MRAs really are comparable to white supremacy groups.
Pinky,
Everyone else has your logic flaws well covered. I just want to point out one more thing. Rapists and rape apologists have always, always denied that rape is rape. It’s the oldest trick in the book. It’s tired bullshit that doesn’t fly. Not around here anyway.
Here’s a bunch of ways I’ve heard rape as being described as something other than rape.
They say marital rape isn’t rape because entering into marriage means you’ve given blanket consent.
They say raping a person who is passed out drunk or high is not rape because the victim wouldn’t have been alone with rapist while intoxicated if s/he didn’t want it.
They say preying on an underaged person isn’t rape. If the victim is a girl, she’s mature for her age and seduced the adult. If the victim is a boy, he can’t have been raped because all teen boys automatically want sex at all times.
They say it isn’t rape if the victim is wearing revealing clothes because a woman doesn’t wear revealing clothes unless she wants sex with anyone who can her.
They say it isn’t rape if the rapist bought her dinner first. After all, she should have known that the price of a surf and turf dinner is sex.
They say it isn’t rape if the rapist is conventionally attractive, because nobody would turn someone who is conventionally attractive.
They say it isn’t rape if the victim flirted with or made out with the rapist first. Doing those things is automatically consent to sex.
They say it isn’t rape if the victim has had previous sexual partners. Letting one dick is automatic consent for all dicks.
We’ve heard it all before Pinky. Stop trying to apologize for rape. You feign innocence because you are using someone else’s words. You aren’t innocent though. You tried to pass off rape apologia as a legitimate opinion. That makes you a rape apologist too. Please read up on consent and learn what it is before you reach adulthood. College campuses don’t need anymore rapists than they already have.
You also might want to familiarize yourself with the phrase “tried as an adult”, Pinky, because if you ever attempt to put the ideas that you’re flirting with into practice you may need it.
(This is another reason why I wasn’t feeling particularly inclined to be charitable. 15 isn’t just old enough not to be able to use youth as an excuse for not understanding these ideas, it’s potentially old enough to be a danger to the people around you.)
According to black women, feminists are pretty racist.
(Flails desperately)
That’s… that’s all you got, man? Really?
erh.
Okay.
I accidentally posted this in the wrong place, now I put it here too.
When pinky mentioned the white supremacy 101 or whatever, that was in response to the suggestion that e Google feminism 101, saying that they’d be biased. BUT. E misses the point. IMO reading white supremacy 101 would be a good place to start if you knew nothing of their claims. The point isn’t to get unbiased information, it’s to find out what they believe. Then the NEXT step is to investigate any claims they made.
Riian,
Already done that. Read it months ago.
Pinky, you read a feminism 101?
Pinky: Would you mind giving me a brief physical description? Just general stuff like hair color, preferred clothing style, etc.
Do you think the Black women who rightly criticize mainstream feminism for being white dominated, leveraging white supremacy, and marginalizing the voices of themselves and other women of colour are arguing in favour of the MRM, you disingenuous scumbag? What the fuck do you think a bunch of misogynists have to give to Black women?
There are plenty of feminist and womanist black women of color out there, you dolt. Feminism has a history of being white-centric and racist, but that doesn’t mean that women’s liberation is a worthless goal or that it’s inherently racist.
No, you don’t do your research. Try this shoddy bullshit in a classroom and watch a tsunami of red ink engulf your ignorant ass.
I’m guessing you do relish “bafoonery,” or you wouldn’t be here showing your ass.
…
“Gee, Superiority Complex, what do you want to do tonight?”
“The same thing we do every night, Pinky – argue pointlessly on the internet using out of date information we have misunderstood!”
[Theme song begins]
He’s Pinky, he’s got a claim
Yes, Pinky, he wants to rage against the dames
One think he is a genius
The others he’s tame
He hangs with misanthropic guys
Their lies they compromise
His dinky worldview, sighs
He’s Pinky and he’s lame, lame, lame, lame,
lame, lame, lame, lame,
lame,
Before each rant is done
His links he twirls
He starts another one
He really hates the girls
He’s Pinky and it’s lame
Yes, Pinky, your arguments are tame
His twilight campaign
Is easy to explain.
To prove his miserly worth
He’ll go on with a dearth (of facts)
It’s stinky
He’s Pinky and it’s lame, tame tame tame, lame
tame
laaaameee
Narf!
—————-
I don’t believe you’re 15. I think it’s a play for sympathy, and trying to make everyone here seem like a mean bully. You’re disingenuous and shortsighted and trying to prove a point by dredging up misunderstood things. It’s lame.
Lame lame lame
lame lame lame
fuck i’ll have that themesong stuck in my head all day now
Oh, and as the sovereign head of Fibin I’m also revoking your citizenship pass now that my point has been proven.
*I* believe he’s 15.
Well I guess I was a pretty insufferable, smug, superior, snide fool when I was 15, so I guess other people could be too.
It just seems a little too convenient, somehow. But I am feeling paranoid today, so that’ll be why.
Da dun dun dun dun
da dun dun dun dun.
There are actually plenty of other teenagers here – I’m one of them. No one here is going to take you more seriously just because you’re a kid who is trying to act precocious.
Nope. Traditionalism has been the driving force of the MRM ever since its emergence. Mainstream MRA websites praise gender roles and make arguments in favor of regarding men and women as inherently different. There are also plenty of MRAs who feel comfortable using racist and sexist slurs and dismissing trans people as mentally ill freaks. Check out AVFM if you don’t believe me. Then again, the thought of a 15-year-old reading AVFM is kind of troubling, so maybe you shouldn’t and just read this blog instead, which has documented a great deal of MRA bigotry and absurdity.
If you’ve done so much research and you want to prove us wrong, then show some citations. Anyone can claim to have done research, but not everyone can actually make that claim truthfully. Given your incessant point-dodging and half-assed, hypocritical accusations of immaturity, I’m inclined to not believe you have done any real research.
Anyway, you don’t seem to understand gender workplace discrimination as conceived by feminists. Gender discrimination isn’t found only in bosses telling women “I think you’re inferior, so I’m going to give you less money.” It is also found in the institutional set-up of society. Women as a group are less likely to be in positions of power and wealth, and that can easily explain why there are fewer female nurses with more advanced credentials (assuming that your research is correct). Women are taught to not be ambitious and instead focus on being useful to men. There are more factors that may be behind this phenomenon, but I have identified at least a few. Maybe you need to do some more research before you act all self-righteous and intellectually superior.
Oh, and here’s some research on how male nurses are privileged compared to their female counterparts due to gender bias: http://www.researchgate.net/publication/7010367_Career_choice_in_nursing_students_gendered_constructs_as_psychological_barriers.pdf
Pinky, my man, I highly recommend you read, learn, and internalize the First Law of Holes.