My family was quite authoritarian, so that I grew up learning that people who disagreed with my father were wrong (or at least, not very smart). When I moved out, my housemate introduced me to personality typing as a way to start to understand the motivations behind the way other people act. I found this very interesting as e.g. you could have two people discussing something and both their points of view could be “right”. However, when I had my mental breakdown I was given crap about personality typing myself, so am now a bit touchy on the subject.
I still have two typing systems left to read about, so I can add yours to the list as it sounds similar. No idea if it will help, but no harm finding out. Thanks. 🙂
P.S. Sorry for the delay. I ended up having a fairly long, heated discussion with my friend on this topic, but it was via Skype (so was scheduled), so I was waiting for that to be over. In general, he is a pretty awesome friend so I didn’t really enjoy being in a fight with him.
@Ally_S
My father works for a mobile phone company. Getting a company phone for me was used as a method to try to control me and the way I acted. I now have my own phone and it feels soooooo much better. I don’t feel qualified to comment on the ‘making you “normal” ‘ thing, apart from that it sounds screwed up, but in terms of controlling behaviour I have a little experience. If you can afford your own phone, I strongly recommend it.
AL3H – I’m sorry, you’ve lost me! I don’t know how the personality typing comes into stuff in the thread, whether about attraction or about shittastic parents. I first read “personality typing” to mean typing as in keyboard, as in something along the lines of writing from different viewpoints, which added to the confusion.
That’s a cute bat, katz. I voted, and I’m commenting so the Open Thread gets visible again in the Recent Comments bar. HEY EVERYONE, GO LOOK AT THAT ADORABLE VAMPIRE BAT.
Well, my brother was rejected by UCSC, so he has no motivation to move back to California anytime soon until/unless he gets in. We might decide to start living here in Colorado again. In fact, everyone here is pressuring me to stay here so that my brother has an excuse for the family to live here (he can just say that he wants to stay in Colorado in order to keep an eye on me).
I’m not very confident; there are a lot of really good entries in this batch :/
AL3H
10 years ago
@kittehserf
It doesn’t matter so much. The point is that what you mentioned sounds like it might have descriptions in it, and descriptions I can work from. 🙂
Even if it doesn’t help, I can still use the way I currently deal with the situation. Basically, I pick a skill I want to learn, and if I feel mopey, I pour my energy into that skill instead, then at least at the end of it I have gotten somewhere. The only downside to this approach is that it is tiring.
All of this isn’t urgent or anything, I just found the “what is attraction like” discussion personally very interesting … and this is the open thread. 🙂
@Katz
That bat is super cute. If it gets made, let us know as I want one so I can hug it.
So, if anyone has tried to access any links to /r/againstmensrights starting from around 2:00 UST yesterday until now, you might notice that you’re being taken to a “this subreddit has been made private” screen.
Yes, this is supposed to happen. I’m an AMR mod, I can confirm.
What happened?
AMR got hit with a brigade. Eight straight hours of a non-stop parade of shit and more shit.
So if you’re trying to access it in the next few days, you might be locked out. This is because we had to lock down the entire subreddit so that we could take a breather. Really sorry about the inconvenience.
Can I get access despite not being a regular member? I was using the archived bit about Warren Farrel for a project of mine, and I’d like to have access to that.
I’ve created a reddit account as of now, and requested access – the name is Fibinachin – so I’ll hope that gets me in?
Now excuse me while I figure out how reddit works.
Hey, all. My GF and I are participating in the New York AIDS Walk again this year, and we’re looking for sponsors. If you can help, even a little bit, follow this link. If you can’t help with money, it would still be a big help if you could share it as much as you can. Thanks.
I’m sorry if this message sounds very dramatic but I’m currenytly experiencing an anxiety attack. There is a significant chance of another flood sweeping this area – the same area that suffered from the September 2013 Colorado floods. It has the potential to be even more destructive because, if it happens, it will be fueled by the snow run-off from the mountains. 7 to 14 inches are expected to fall in the mountains tonight, and the snow will be followed by a sharp increase in temperature – up to the 80s in some areas.
I don’t know how to handle myself right now. I’m having the same stomach-churning anxiety that I only get when I’m fearing for my life and those of others. The exact same anxiety I had during the previous flood. We can’t afford another flood, especially not a more destructive one. Not only is FEMA being completely unreasonable and jacking up my step-dad’s flood insurance to no end, but he is also in a financially tight situation for other reasons. This flood, if it happens, will be completely devastating and have consequences that will potentially harm everyone in the worst ways imaginable.
Any good thoughts, well wishes, prayers, etc. would be appreciated. I’m already consumed by my own mental illnesses right now – one can only imagine how miserable I feel right now with the fear of the flood hanging above my head constantly. I don’t even have an appetite anymore – no doubt a disappointment to my siblings, who are picking up a pizza from a place nearby. I’m sick of everything.
Myoo
10 years ago
I hope nothing bad happens, Ally. Hugs.
contrapangloss
10 years ago
Ally, consider yourself in my prayers, good thoughts, and well wishes.
You are amazing.
You will survive.
You can do this.
Your siblings aren’t dissapointed in you for not having a grateful appetite. They (if anything) will just be worried about you.
Heck, you’re younger than me, and have dealt with things I can’t even imagine. Compared to me, you are astoundingly strong, mentally and emotionally. It may not feel like it, at the moment, but you are incredible.
I’ll pray, well wish, and attempt to send positive brainwaves your direction.
My anxiety attack is finally gone. (And I regained my appetite as well.) I don’t feel bad about having an anxiety attack, but being anxious about floods isn’t going to help me or anyone else. All that may be of use when/if the flood comes will be focusing on getting the hell out of this place. Maybe my anxiety will help me out then; during the previous flood, my anxiety pushed me to run pretty fast while carrying my little brother and one of the cats. I know that sounds kind of like a cheesy escape scene from a action movie, but it actually happened.
If you folks don’t hear from me in two days, please don’t assume the worst; my family and I survived the 2013 floods, and we’ll survive this one, too. Maybe the flood won’t even happen. I mean, there haven’t been any official warnings or anything yet.
Unimaginative
10 years ago
I hate, hate, HATE flood season. Anxiety is almost never helpful, but if you’re finding a way to cope with it and use it, good for you! If you can get your hands on some kava kava (available at health food stores, but sometimes they hide it since it was restricted at one point in the past), I’ve used it to calm down. It stops my anxiety attacks in their tracks. (And makes me unsafe to drive, so plan accordingly.)
I love the image of you outracing the water with a boy and a cat on your back. I’m mentally putting you in a Sailor Moon suit (with added cape) for extra smiles.
We Hunted The Mammoth
I have a new blog post up at last! Not that there’s anything much people here don’t know already in it, but it was nice to collect my latest pics.
http://vignettesacrosstheveil.wordpress.com/2014/04/19/im-not-dead-yet/
@Kittehserf
My family was quite authoritarian, so that I grew up learning that people who disagreed with my father were wrong (or at least, not very smart). When I moved out, my housemate introduced me to personality typing as a way to start to understand the motivations behind the way other people act. I found this very interesting as e.g. you could have two people discussing something and both their points of view could be “right”. However, when I had my mental breakdown I was given crap about personality typing myself, so am now a bit touchy on the subject.
I still have two typing systems left to read about, so I can add yours to the list as it sounds similar. No idea if it will help, but no harm finding out. Thanks. 🙂
P.S. Sorry for the delay. I ended up having a fairly long, heated discussion with my friend on this topic, but it was via Skype (so was scheduled), so I was waiting for that to be over. In general, he is a pretty awesome friend so I didn’t really enjoy being in a fight with him.
@Ally_S
My father works for a mobile phone company. Getting a company phone for me was used as a method to try to control me and the way I acted. I now have my own phone and it feels soooooo much better. I don’t feel qualified to comment on the ‘making you “normal” ‘ thing, apart from that it sounds screwed up, but in terms of controlling behaviour I have a little experience. If you can afford your own phone, I strongly recommend it.
AL3H – I’m sorry, you’ve lost me! I don’t know how the personality typing comes into stuff in the thread, whether about attraction or about shittastic parents. I first read “personality typing” to mean typing as in keyboard, as in something along the lines of writing from different viewpoints, which added to the confusion.
I think I need coffee. :/
Whee my squishable vampire bat design is up for vote! If it gets a high enough score it will get made into an actual stuffed vampire bat!
That’s a cute bat, katz. I voted, and I’m commenting so the Open Thread gets visible again in the Recent Comments bar. HEY EVERYONE, GO LOOK AT THAT ADORABLE VAMPIRE BAT.
Well, my brother was rejected by UCSC, so he has no motivation to move back to California anytime soon until/unless he gets in. We might decide to start living here in Colorado again. In fact, everyone here is pressuring me to stay here so that my brother has an excuse for the family to live here (he can just say that he wants to stay in Colorado in order to keep an eye on me).
I’m not very confident; there are a lot of really good entries in this batch :/
@kittehserf
It doesn’t matter so much. The point is that what you mentioned sounds like it might have descriptions in it, and descriptions I can work from. 🙂
Even if it doesn’t help, I can still use the way I currently deal with the situation. Basically, I pick a skill I want to learn, and if I feel mopey, I pour my energy into that skill instead, then at least at the end of it I have gotten somewhere. The only downside to this approach is that it is tiring.
All of this isn’t urgent or anything, I just found the “what is attraction like” discussion personally very interesting … and this is the open thread. 🙂
@Katz
That bat is super cute. If it gets made, let us know as I want one so I can hug it.
Voted for your bat, katz! 🙂
Ally – that sounds good, actually, if your brother comes to Colorado. If nothing else, it’s one more family member away from the male progenitor unit.
I really enjoyed that attraction conversation too, AL3H.
Hi guys!
So, if anyone has tried to access any links to /r/againstmensrights starting from around 2:00 UST yesterday until now, you might notice that you’re being taken to a “this subreddit has been made private” screen.
Yes, this is supposed to happen. I’m an AMR mod, I can confirm.
What happened?
AMR got hit with a brigade. Eight straight hours of a non-stop parade of shit and more shit.
So if you’re trying to access it in the next few days, you might be locked out. This is because we had to lock down the entire subreddit so that we could take a breather. Really sorry about the inconvenience.
If you’re an AMR regular, you can message us moderators using this link, and you’ll be added to our approved list ASAP. <3
Alice, that sucks. I love how MRAs only respect freeze peaches when they’re the ones being “targeted”.
It’s okay, we got to ban a whole bunch of shitheads, and now we’re taking a break and laughing at MRAs again and having fun before we reopen. 😀
Can I get access despite not being a regular member? I was using the archived bit about Warren Farrel for a project of mine, and I’d like to have access to that.
I’ve created a reddit account as of now, and requested access – the name is Fibinachin – so I’ll hope that gets me in?
Now excuse me while I figure out how reddit works.
Also I should add that I’m nice and charming and will repay you in poetry, fiction, html, css or javascript and or pasta recipes.
Hey, all. My GF and I are participating in the New York AIDS Walk again this year, and we’re looking for sponsors. If you can help, even a little bit, follow this link. If you can’t help with money, it would still be a big help if you could share it as much as you can. Thanks.
@Fibinachi, I PM’d Alice to ask her to get you access. It might be public again soon in any case.
@seraph4377, will try to kick in a few bucks later today.
cloudah – I just woke up, and Fibinachi now has access (another moderator granted it through modmail).
I’m sorry if this message sounds very dramatic but I’m currenytly experiencing an anxiety attack. There is a significant chance of another flood sweeping this area – the same area that suffered from the September 2013 Colorado floods. It has the potential to be even more destructive because, if it happens, it will be fueled by the snow run-off from the mountains. 7 to 14 inches are expected to fall in the mountains tonight, and the snow will be followed by a sharp increase in temperature – up to the 80s in some areas.
I don’t know how to handle myself right now. I’m having the same stomach-churning anxiety that I only get when I’m fearing for my life and those of others. The exact same anxiety I had during the previous flood. We can’t afford another flood, especially not a more destructive one. Not only is FEMA being completely unreasonable and jacking up my step-dad’s flood insurance to no end, but he is also in a financially tight situation for other reasons. This flood, if it happens, will be completely devastating and have consequences that will potentially harm everyone in the worst ways imaginable.
Any good thoughts, well wishes, prayers, etc. would be appreciated. I’m already consumed by my own mental illnesses right now – one can only imagine how miserable I feel right now with the fear of the flood hanging above my head constantly. I don’t even have an appetite anymore – no doubt a disappointment to my siblings, who are picking up a pizza from a place nearby. I’m sick of everything.
I hope nothing bad happens, Ally. Hugs.
Ally, consider yourself in my prayers, good thoughts, and well wishes.
You are amazing.
You will survive.
You can do this.
Your siblings aren’t dissapointed in you for not having a grateful appetite. They (if anything) will just be worried about you.
Heck, you’re younger than me, and have dealt with things I can’t even imagine. Compared to me, you are astoundingly strong, mentally and emotionally. It may not feel like it, at the moment, but you are incredible.
I’ll pray, well wish, and attempt to send positive brainwaves your direction.
SOON, MY TAKE OVER-SHALL BE COMPLETE!
Thank you. Thank you fellow moderates from me as well, I appreciate the access. Using it for “good” things.
Well I won’t even pretend to know what happened there – but there was a “Best of luck to you Ally” included in that original message.
Best of luck to you, Ally
Stay safe, Ally. You are going to be OK.
Thanks, everyone.
My anxiety attack is finally gone. (And I regained my appetite as well.) I don’t feel bad about having an anxiety attack, but being anxious about floods isn’t going to help me or anyone else. All that may be of use when/if the flood comes will be focusing on getting the hell out of this place. Maybe my anxiety will help me out then; during the previous flood, my anxiety pushed me to run pretty fast while carrying my little brother and one of the cats. I know that sounds kind of like a cheesy escape scene from a action movie, but it actually happened.
If you folks don’t hear from me in two days, please don’t assume the worst; my family and I survived the 2013 floods, and we’ll survive this one, too. Maybe the flood won’t even happen. I mean, there haven’t been any official warnings or anything yet.
I hate, hate, HATE flood season. Anxiety is almost never helpful, but if you’re finding a way to cope with it and use it, good for you! If you can get your hands on some kava kava (available at health food stores, but sometimes they hide it since it was restricted at one point in the past), I’ve used it to calm down. It stops my anxiety attacks in their tracks. (And makes me unsafe to drive, so plan accordingly.)
I love the image of you outracing the water with a boy and a cat on your back. I’m mentally putting you in a Sailor Moon suit (with added cape) for extra smiles.