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Amy Schumer takes on "Nice Guys" with "Hello M'Lady"

From Comedy Central’s Inside Amy Schumer, here’s a little skit taking on the phenomenon of the Nice Guy. No fedoras so be seen, but other than that she pretty much covers all the bases, right on down to the neckbeards on some of the fellas. Caution: Mild creepshaming.

NOTE TO ANGRY MRAS: This video does not represent an official statement on the part of feminism. Amy Schumer is a COMEDIAN.

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mildlymagnificent
10 years ago

katz, how did you find that thing?

Not only does this person know very little about same sex couples, s/he seems entirely unfamiliar with families and how they work. Uncles, aunts, cousins, ancestors – any and all can be part of your raising and of your identity.

But the brainpain from reading the first couple of paragraphs was excruciating. If I liked scented motherfucking candles I’d light one for a bit of aromatherapy.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

It’d be one thing if he was assuming nuclear families where the parents are the only related adults who the kids know, but I’m scratching my head trying to figure how you’d end up with a scenario where the kids know their grandparents well, but not their aunts or uncles or older cousins. Many generations of only children on both sides of the family?

sparky
sparky
10 years ago

Huh. So, apparently, married homosexual men can only adopt boys, never girls.

maggiesausage
maggiesausage
10 years ago

Kinda smacks of the old “if everyone were gay, the whole population would die out” bullshit that implies that gays are trying to outlaw heterosexuality; this one acknowledges that gays can reproduce but they’re still trying to outlaw the existence of other genders it seems.

weirwoodtreehugger
10 years ago

Why would a woman even want to marry a closeted gay men? It seems like they’d both be pretty miserable.

katz
10 years ago

We should poke him and see if he’ll come comment here, we need some originality in our trolls.

Surprisingly, it’s a woman, Kelly Bartlett. If she’s grepping, and you know she is, she should show up anytime now.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

I assumed it was a man because of the whole thing about how she knows women have value as moms and grandmas because of observing the women in her family. If she’s a woman why does she need to observe other women to determine that women aren’t worthless? What a strange, sad person.

katz
10 years ago

Thought you guys would be entertained by that. My favorite bit is how it accidentally ends up being an argument against all sperm/egg donors, surrogacy, and adoption.

Cat
Cat
10 years ago

Off topic but I’ve just attempted to watch this horror show called “Cowboy del Amore” on Netflix…it’s essentially a documentary about a man who arranges marriages with American men and Mexican women and it’s likes he’s selling/sizing up livestock.

Cat
Cat
10 years ago

Whoops…”like”

kittehserf
10 years ago

“Wat?” pretty much summed up my reaction, too. My eyes glazed over and it wasn’t cos I had the wrong glasses on.

Arctic Ape
Arctic Ape
10 years ago

If we outlaw heterosexual marriage, only gays will have in-laws.

zippydoo
zippydoo
10 years ago

Put me on the ‘wat?’ bandwagon.

All I got from it is that gay marriage is oppressing my ability to be pregnant and barefoot in the kitchen? Will my uterus be confiscated and socks sewn onto my feet? I know I can’t catch teh gay, because lesbians are nowhere in her doomsday scenario, so will I forced to hold down a job and wear pants and lament the lack of men because they’ve all been seduced into becoming gay? Are women so awful that legally restricting marriage is the only thing convincing men to have children with women? And where do widowers and single dads fit into her little world, are they just the evil precursors to gay marriage? So many questions.

Buttercup Q. Skullpants
Buttercup Q. Skullpants
10 years ago

When I start a family, I’ll make sure to have a balanced gender ratio and a minimum quota of at least 25% African-American, Hispanic, Inuit, Filipino, and Other (Not Specified). I’m also looking for SAT scores of at least 2100, clarinetists, and lacrosse players.

Oh wait, I already started my family, but accidentally excluded the father. Great. Now I have to worry about a class-action suit.

Lionel
Lionel
10 years ago

@Artctic Ape: “If we outlaw heterosexual marriage, only gays will have in-laws.”
With that, I can’t tell if you’re arguing for or against gay marriage. 😉

Lionel
Lionel
10 years ago

@Arctic Ape: …Or for or against marriage in general, come to think of it.

kittehserf
10 years ago

zippydoo:

All I got from it is that gay marriage is oppressing my ability to be pregnant and barefoot in the kitchen?

Huzzah for gay marriage!

Will my uterus be confiscated and socks sewn onto my feet?

Second huzzah! I have no need for a uterus and think of how much time I’ll save not having to look for missing socks. I’d swear they’ve started a colony under my bed.

Buttercup:

When I start a family, I’ll make sure to have a balanced gender ratio and a minimum quota of at least 25% African-American, Hispanic, Inuit, Filipino, and Other (Not Specified).

Any chance the Other will include kitties? I’d sign up for having kitties.

Lionel:

@Artctic Ape: “If we outlaw heterosexual marriage, only gays will have in-laws.”
With that, I can’t tell if you’re arguing for or against gay marriage. 😉

…Or for or against marriage in general, come to think of it.

LOL yes, I was wondering that!

Arctic Ape
Arctic Ape
10 years ago

With that, I can’t tell if you’re arguing for or against gay marriage.

Who’s talking about gay marriage? I was making a thoughtful point in the discussion on whether straight marriage should be banned*. I’m not taking sides in that either, just throwing in my two cents**.

*I first saw the outlaw/in-law joke in a gun rights thread, where it was funny by being absurdist rather than appropriate.

**Some Eurozone countries have one and two cent coins, but in Finland only five cents and up. As a cash payment, 0.02 € would be rounded down to zero.

Octo
Octo
10 years ago

**Some Eurozone countries have one and two cent coins, but in Finland only five cents and up. As a cash payment, 0.02 € would be rounded down to zero.

Hm. So only four coins below 1 Euro. Make the 10c coin copper, and you’d have to copper and two ‘gold’ coins. That would make them easier distinguishable. Three barely different sizes per colour is just unpractical…

[/going wildly offtopic]

Bina
10 years ago

Well, clearly I missed one helluva boat here. 25-odd years ago, I had a golden opportunity to marry a gay guy and make myself utterly miserable as a traditional wife while he could have snuck out and shagged any number of other gay guys behind my back. Strangely, we both passed up that opportunity. He’s now legally and happily married to a lovely guy he met not long after he came out to me, and I’m still happily unmarried myself. And the best part is, we’re still great friends and chat on the internets every day.

I don’t for an instant blame his being gay for my being unmarried, though…I’m just godawfully picky. Meaning, I don’t want to end up with a guy who treats me as an accessory. I want a person who treats me as a person, too.

Clearly, I ask way, WAY too much.

katz
10 years ago

Bina, you have clear grounds for a discrimination lawsuit there. He blatantly chose not to marry you because of your gender.

Buttercup Q. Skullpants
Buttercup Q. Skullpants
10 years ago

kittehserf – yes indeed, kittehs are an important component of diversity. My family tree regularly gets cats stuck in it.

I’ve seen variations of this argument leveled at single/choice moms too. “Single mothers are incredibly selfish,” the argument goes, “because they’re depriving the child of its right to a father.”

No, no, no. Children don’t have the “right” to a particular relationship or family structure, any more than they have the “right” to be born into a white, functional, upper-middle-class family. Otherwise, just about every person in less-than-perfect non-Barbie circumstances who has children could be accused of being selfish and screwing their child over on some dimension. (And ultimately, what parent doesn’t have kids for selfish reasons?)

Kids have the right to stability and security and having their emotional needs yet. Having a mommy and a daddy doesn’t guarantee that.

weirwoodtreehugger
10 years ago

I hate it when people just demonize single mothers without mentioning the fathers. Not that I think unmarried parents should be demonized at all. It’s just that some people- usually right wingers act like women asexually reproduce out of spite.

Buttercup Q. Skullpants
Buttercup Q. Skullpants
10 years ago

Yeah, not too many pearls get clutched when it comes to the fathers. Generally it’s lesbian parents and single women going the sperm donor route who trigger the “right to a father” objection – where it’s seen as a conscious choice to cut dads out of the equation, instead of being just the way that particular parental cookie crumbled for those families. I stopped reading sensationalist articles on fertility treatment because the comments section always attracts dozens of self-appointed Arbiters Of Who Should Have Children.

A common corollary argument is “you’re subverting nature/God’s will by going through fertility treatements and having children, obviously you weren’t meant to procreate, blah blah won’t someone think of the gene pool”. I’m sure these very same people think nothing of seeking medical treatment for, say, a broken leg, and wouldn’t be very happy if the E.R. doc shrugged and said “well, it’s clearly God’s will that you not be able to walk.”

Women having babies is like a duck call for concern trolls.