In case anyone was wondering, the Men Going Their Own Way movement has managed to survive the implosion of MGTOWforums.com that I wrote about a little while ago. Yep, the regulars from there have moved on to several new forums where they continue to celebrate their independence from the women of the world by happily discussing such manly hobbies as video games, model trains, taxidermy and knitting.
Oh, who am I kidding? They don’t talk about any of that stuff. Basically they continue to nurse their grudges against the women who wouldn’t date them in high school, somehow convincing themselves that the best way to be “free” of women is to obsess about them every minute of every day.
Take the charming fella who calls himself ManWithAPlan, who has managed to win himself nearly 1900 “likes” from his comrades on the MGTOW HQ message boards with comments like the following:
I hate [women] because most of them acted like stuck up cunts when they were young and hot. Then they hit 30+ and decide to settle down, and when there are no men to settle down, they start shaming men. This is where most of my hate/negativity comes from, the fact that these women feel entitled to “good” men after having spent the last 15-20 years telling guys “just because you bought me a drink/dinner doesn’t mean I owe you sex”.
And every woman acts this way. Oh you want to slut it up? Sure go ahead and be a cum rag, but I would never date a cum rag. And how would they react to that? “Oh well that’s your preference and you’re entitled to it”. Yeah right, they’d flip their shit and go into shaming language ahoy.
The reason I derive so much pleasure from this is because for the first time in their lives women are being held accountable for their actions. And they don’t fucking like it. Remember when some girl/woman got you in trouble for just crying while you weren’t in the wrong? This is fucking payback.
(Emphasis mine.)
This may sound a little harsh, but you need to remember that for most young women, life is just an endless VIP party:
Women are born with their so called value. By 15 or whatever they have the looks and power to attract most men. By 18, depending on how attractive they are, they’re either dating 30 year old millionaires or (if less attractive) fucking the football team. And they retain this value until at some point into their 30’s, sometimes 40’s. Men get nothing. We are born invisible. We have to claw, work and suffer for 2-3 decades before we get any recognition. And by that point, we no longer have the energy or fast metabolism we had in our youth. So that means double time for us.
Women are handed the world on a silver platter, men have to fight for it.
Is the MGTOW movement the least successful “independence” movement ever? They’re like someone who breaks up with you, angrily marches out the front door, slams it behind them — and then spends the next five years on your front porch peering in the window.
Trans_commie,
My favorite quote:
Isn’t it great how he had to give the straw feminist’s lines words such as; “likes,” “totally” and “stuff” in order to make her look like an inarticulate bimbo?
Does this guy really have female friends? I wonder if they know he secretly hates them.
cassandrakitty,
Could be. I wonder if this is part of why homophobic men (Most misogynists are also bigots of other sorts too.) may watch lipstick lesbian type porn or be in a threesome with 2 women and be turned on but be repulsed by the very idea of gay men having sex.
Do you get to that mental place by thinking women are the sex class, yet pure until touched by a filthy man and men are gross, and no decent people should want to fuck them?
Is that how they end up associating sex with degradation? Is that why they think gay sex is scary and icky?
That kind of self-loathing combined with the belief that they are owed sex, but enjoying sex with a man (or worse, men) makes a woman dirty can lead some pretty dark places.
I guess if you think of yourself (or other men) as inherently sexually disgusting, then the only people beneath you (and people like you) are the ones who desire you. There’s that “I wouldn’t be a member of a club that would have me” mentality we see so often.
That would explain why we see so many misogynists insulting women (especially feminists) by calling them lesbians, but usually implying that means they are butch and assertive or “too much like men”. Ultimately, their insults all lead back to …wait for it…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….. http://media.tumblr.com/621041a1ff1fee8c70d23e4597bdbbfb/tumblr_inline_mkdtf9gFQ41qz4rgp.png
I think there’s also an element of self-protective, willful delusion with some of these guys. If they were to admit that most women are physically (and emotionally) attracted to men, then what would that mean in terms of women not wanting to be with them? That thought stings too much, so let’s just pretend that as a rule women aren’t actually attracted to men on a physical (or emotional) level, only money or fame, and of course it’s not the dude’s fault that he doesn’t have those things. Life is so much easier when you can displace all uncomfortable emotions onto other people.
If you start from the assumption that these men think that sex should be degrading for women as a matter of course, it makes a disgusting kind of sense for them to see the things that they do to women during sex (and even themselves) as inherently “dirty”. With that in mind, it also makes sense how vehemently they oppose healthy attitudes to sex, since it exposes how unhealthy their sexuality often is.
Trans commie,
I think we can make up our own rules for you, since the patriarchy pretends you don’t exist.
I say we declare you to be now and forever perfect and wonderful and that nothing and no one can ever change that.
Meanwhile, every time I see “another dimension” I hear:
I was eighteen not that long ago, and I’ve never even met a millionaire or a football player. One of my friends went on a date with a rugby player once, but that’s about it. Am I doing something wrong? Maybe my silver platter full of football-playing millionaires got lost in the mail.
cassandrakitty,
There’s that. Then to protect themselves further, they decide to believe that if they see a man who is not wealthy or famous having positive relationships with women, that man must be a mangina / beta / white knight. That way the flaw is always outside of the misogynist himself. It is to him, an unsolvable problem. Therefore he has no reason to lift a finger to improve himself or his situation. It’s an easy way out, but an unpleasant one.
dlouwe,
Right? If everyone else adopts a healthy attitude toward sex and they stay sick, their warped pov becomes more obvious and repellent. They need the cover of rape culture and old, patriarchal taboos to feel comfortable.
I simultaneously despise these people and yet feel kind of sorry that they are totally incapable of appreciating half the people they meet in a non-sexual capacity. They live in such a small, sad, cynical world. It’s like they were angry, self-isolating teenagers like I was, but they just never grew out of it.
Hey, MGTOW, let me tell you a secret.
Ugly, poor and stupid men have sex all the time. Women aren’t all flocking to the same alpha males and leaving the majority of humanity in the dust; it’s just YOU who are such dregs that no woman wants anything to do with you.
Except when it’s Liquid Fucking Gold, of course.
Reminds me of when a friend went to the US and they were all “You have such a lovely accent!” She told ’em “No, I don’t have an accent. You all have accents.”
.
Yes please!
I’ve only had sexual contact with a man who’s in Spirit. Extra BOOM!
@ Kittehs
Here you go! The vanilla is the one I just had, but I imagine the others would be pretty good too, given that the same company (Ito En) also makes the best bottled tea on the market.
http://jaystreetcoffee.com/
Thanks, cassandra! I shall put that in my travel notes. 🙂
Ito En also has some great green tea. Best green tea in a can ever.
For MRA’s obsession with teenage girls I am convinced that 99% of them don’t actually know or spend any time with any of them.
It was only a few years ago that I was 18 and when I was 18 I was dating another 18 year old and most of my friends were doing the same or not dating at all.
Hey MRA’s, you do realise that most of the “teenage girls” you see in the various media are not actually teenage girls? The “teenager girls” in Teen Wolf and Glee are played by women in their 20’s, and the “teens” in your porn are also (hopefully) not teenagers either?
Also, have you all seen the story about James Franco creeping on a 17 year old online? I bet you any money the MRA’s will be screaming about this one.
@kittehserf
I wasn’t old enough to notice the Howard govt. so I can’t make any comment on them. But, although I hadn’t heard about *that* aspect of their “illegals” policy, I’m not surprised. We are actually violating human rights after all.
The worst part (apart from the violation of human rights) is how so many people are like “Yay, those foreigners aren’t stealing our precious money anymore!” Racism, what racism?
Actually, I lie. The worst part is the fact that they threatened the ABC for not solely reporting their propaganda about refugees.
So much of our government is actually fucking terrifying.
Cassandrakitty just summed it all up quite nicely.
QFT.
I agree w/Kootiepatra. Speaking of invisible people, why is ‘shy, awkward, insecure, bookish nerd’ always coded male? I was a shy, awkward, insecure, bookish nerd and (spoiler alert) a girl. I spent most of high school believing I would never get a date. Any time a guy I liked came to ask me ‘a kind of personal question,’ he generally wanted advice on how to tell the girl he liked (who was not me) that he was interested in her
Skye,
Me too! Speaking of invisible. That’s what people like us are. Women are always supposed to be socially adept. So many people don’t realize socially awkward women exist. Literally every guy I ever dated I met while drinking. Only alcohol loosens up the inhibitions enough to get me to point where I can flirt! Once on a date, I’m fine, but the initial contact is so hard for me.
Not only coded male, but used as cover/excuse for men who are no such thing – the creepers. Like WWTH said, women are expected (as in ‘required’) to be socially adept, to smooth things out for the poor awkard shy geeky etc etc men, pat them on the heads, read their minds and sex them without having to be asked. We’re also expected to treat every predatory slimeball who uses that imagery as cover as if he is the poor shy etc dude, and be sweet and forgiving and give him a chaaaance and sex him on demand.
But women who’re shy, awkward, and so on? No excuses. If you’re pretty and shy or frightened and some predator is creeping you out (at least) or some NiceGuy is moping after you, it’s entirely your fault for not Telling Him Sooner!
Hi David,
Not sure what level of expertise you need for your question, but although I don’t work in a mental health field, I have a degree in Psychology (focussing on mental health topics) and am starting a PhD studying schizophrenia next year. I also have online access to all the journals and stuff through my university so I could do some digging in the literature for you if it’s that kind of question. I’d be happy to try to advise you if you think I could be of help, just drop me an email.
Am I a bit late to this party? Oh, what the hell…
Um, what? At 15, I had no power whatsoever. And my looks were those of a gawky, awkward, frizzy-haired nerd with occasional zits that I was at constant pains to keep covered up. So, unless “most men” are total creepers who don’t care what you look like as long as you have a vagina they can insert themselves into, this statement makes no sense.
Ditto the “by 18” bit. At that age, I had grown into my looks a bit (still not as much as I would do after 20, or 30, or 40) but I wasn’t remotely interested in 30-year-olds, millionaire or otherwise (too damn old, and money be damned). And neither was I into football players. My high school didn’t have a football team; basketball was the big thing there, and I hated the basketballers because they fucking HARASSED me daily from Grade 9 on up. And I was unathletic myself, and uninterested in sports, and definitely NOT interested in being a cheerleader.
In fact, at 18, the only real thing I had on the brain was university. So I spent my last year of high school getting the grades that would get me into the school of my choice. Not dating millionaires or sleeping with jocks.
But I guess the idea of an awkward, bright, ambitious girl who would never trade sex for anything is beyond these sock-wankers.
Blna, I don’t think it’s beyond them, I think it goes like this:
1) Blna is a terrifying threat, having not prioritised my penis.
2) I must quickly construct a narrative where Blna will end up bitter and old and saying: I sure wish I’d slept with these guys on their terms while I could have!
3) Ignore any evidence to the contrary.
That’s because those are the type of girls that these guys notice. I will find the source for this eventually but there have been a couple of studies performed looking at the fact that many men don’t actually even necessarily register the existence of women they don’t find attractive – they just aren’t even on their radar. They don’t register the existence of women who might be too overweight for them (unless they happen to get in the way somehow) or women whose face they don’t think is pretty, etc, therefore in their totally skewed worldview, women who don’t date millionaires at or have sex with the entire football team truly don’t exist for them.
And meanwhile, here’s me, thinking “Gawd, I really dodged a bullet!”, when I think of these guys at all. If they only knew how much sleeping with them does not enrich a woman’s life…
Confirmation bias is alive and well…and looks a lot like Farrah Fawcett in her heyday. I can’t even begin to tell you the number of guys who passed me over because I wasn’t a blonde, or because I had glasses, etc. Luckily, my attitude was something on the order of “Oh yeah? Well, who needs YOU, anyway?”