Quiz: Who said “Sluts are just whores in training?”

Time for a little quiz!

Who posted comments online in which he (or she) declared that:

“Sluts are just whores in training.”

“Women look at 2 bulges on a man, one in the front of the pants or second one in the back pocket. Whichever one is bigger, they can do without the other.”

“What’s the most used line in Arkansas: daddy get off me you are crushing my cigarettes.”

Female college students are “sororostutes.”

Women expect special treatment because of their “golden vajay jays”

Khloe Kardashian is “black by injection.”

Your choices are:

Oprah

Paul Elam

Redditor “NaggerPlease”

Arkansas Circuit Judge Mike Maggio

So who was it? Let’s work through the alternatives. Unsurprisingly, it’s not Oprah; while she has referred to “vajay jays” she has not, as far as I know, referred specifically to golden ones, and the rest of the comments really don’t match her views at all.

Perhaps a little surprisingly, it’s not Paul Elam either, though he has many terrible opinions about sluts and whores.

NaggerPlease, meanwhile, is just a name I made up because it seems like the sort of “edgy” borderline-racist name some dude on Reddit would come up with. It turns out there actually is a NaggerPlease on Reddit, though they haven’t posted anything.

So, yep, the correct answer is actually Arkansas Circuit Judge Mike Maggio, who was recently outed as a regular commenter on a Louisiana State University fan message board called Tiger Droppings.  Say hello, Mike!

Using the name “geauxjudge,” Maggio posted what seems to have been an endless stream of racist, misogynistic, homophobic and otherwise offensive comments on the board — many of them worse than the small sampling I’ve posted above. He also revealed confidential (alleged) details of an adoption hearing involving actress Charlize Theron. (For more of the comments and the gory details, see here and here.)

He’s now under investigation for all of this; revealing the alleged details of the Theron case were apparently quite a serious ethical violation.

In the wake of the outing, Maggio has withdrawn from a race for appellate judge and has offered up a rather impressively half-assed apology for his terrible comments:

I take full responsibility for the comments that have been attributed to me.

That’s a weirdly indirect way to admit you wrote the comments.

I apologize deeply for my lapse in personal judgment and for that, I have no excuse. The comments posted were not acceptable.

Well, it was a bit more than a lapse. It was lapse after lapse after lapse after lapse. But at least this sounds like an apology.

These comments are not a reflection of who I am.

Uh, how are the comments you just took “full resposibility for” not a reflection of you? Who are they a reflection of? Not-Me, the naughty ghost from The Family Circus?

During my life, I have prided myself in treating all fairly and with respect, both personally and professionally. … I ask for both yours and God’s forgiveness.

… for the “lapse” that isn’t really a reflection of who you are.

My actions are not indicative or illustrative of the conservative political philosophy of which I hold dear.

Huh. Then why does so much of it line up so precisely with the anti-woman, anti-gay and racist dogwhistle rhetoric of the far right today?

It is a shame that the politics of personal destruction take precedence along with the win at all costs mentality that results in the disjunction.

Uh, are you really using your alleged APOLOGY for your bigoted statements to attack the people who pointed out your bigotry? Do you not understand the concept of an apology?

At this time, in light of the pain I have caused to my family, friends, supporters, the Judicial Branch, and the public, I have requested that the Secretary of State remove me from the ballot.

I would ask you to respect my family’s need for privacy so we can being the healing process of forgiveness.

I think in order to merit forgiveness you have to actually stop being an asshole. Or at least make an effort in that direction.

Men’s Rights activists often complain that they are locked out of the political system in “gynocratic” America. But here is a gentleman who seems to share 90% of their ideology and who, pending the result of an investigation of his comments, is actually in a position of some real power within the system.

And like most MRAs I’ve ever dealt with, he takes no real responsibility for his shit when he gets called on it.

Embrace Mike Maggio, MRAs. He’s your poster boy. He’s you.

Note: Thanks to Pecunium for pointing me to this story.