Happy Valentine’s Day, gynocrats!.
Over on A Voice for Male Students, the always-reasonable and never-hysterical Jonathan Taylor celebrates this day of candies and flowers and irritating Kay Jewelry commercials with a lovely little piece entitled “The gynocentrism of Valentine’s Day, and the spoiled princess mentality.”
In it, he takes aim at a holiday he sees as rewarding the sort of woman who behaves like a “privileged princess who didn’t get her pony when she was five.”
His proof of this “gynocentrism?” The custom graphics on Google’s home page today, which I have screencapped and pasted in above.
At first glance, this all seems very innocent. We all remember these adorably crappy candies with the little messages on them. But Taylor is able to discern its insidious deeper meaning in their words:
The inclusion of the “Mr. Right” heart may seem like a small thing, but it is also rather telling, especially coming from the #1 website in the world. Women have expectations and standards. Where are men’s expectations and standards?
We aren’t told about them. Unlike “Mr. Right,” the phrase “Ms. Right” isn’t used in common parlance. The very incidence of men having standards for women is often regarded as sexist, even if they are entirely reasonable – such as not being so fat that you are diabetic by the time you are 35 and bedridden by the time you are 55.
In the age of Feminism, the only people women “answer to” are themselves.
Now that I’ve taken a closer look at Google’s message, I think that Mr. Taylor is if anything understating its creepy gynocentric intent. Take a look again at the first two candies.
CRUSH MR. RIGHT
Clearly this is an invitation to murder. Nay, to MAN GENOCIDE.
FIRST KISS 4EVER YOURS
… because if he is dead, your first kiss will make him — or at least his corpse — forever yours.
PUPPY LOVE
Of course if he is dead, he will not be able to fulfill his normal sexual functions. So Google seems to be recommending bestiality.
BLIND DATE
And then, to cover up your crimes, it suggests that you blind all of your future dates so they can’t see the corpse you’ve got stashed in the spare bedroom. (You may also need to do something about their sense of smell.)
Has the true ugliness of this gynocentric holiday ever been more nakedly displayed?
—
Just in case anyone missed it, this post is almost entirely made up of
… except for the bit about Kay Jewelry ads, which really are irritating.
My preferred way for dating is dutch or one pays once then the other pays on the next date. Or if you go to a movie one person buys the tickets and the other buys drinks and popcorn.
This valentines, bf and I are making lasagna from scratch together, getting wasted, playing video games and then having the sexy times. Actually, that kinda sounds like most nights… Except tonight it’s wine instead of beer, and the table has scented motherfucking candles on it.
that’s not what i think; it’s generally the attitudes people who think “guy always pays” hold. They then whine about it being unfair to the guy ignoring that they are expecting the women to “give” him something in return. So when people say “guy always pays” is unfair i’m like “ok but wtf are you expecting the girl to do?” because those attitudes don’t normally develope without some expectation of fucked up rigid gender roles.
I got chocolate and balloons today from friends and family and I like that. Also I saw hot guy and my ovaries exploded. I like valentine’s day but I like thanksgiving more. I hate the stupid jewelry commercials. Especially those stupid open heart necklaces. They didn’t look like open hearts they look like snakes. I like real snakes not fake ones.
Congrats to everyone celebrating with their loved ones today. Don’t eat too much chocolate. Jk there is no such thing as too much.
Today at work someone got a singing valentine’s telegram! That someone was a man and it was from his wife. Warmed my heart and everyone else’s! I’m not making any deductions about men women and valentines, just thought I’d put it out there. So cool. If these guys weren’t such insufferable dicks, they might be on the receiving end of a valentine from a loved one. They may want to give one to their significant others out of love and appreciation. How this angry misogynistic slant colors the world so darkly for them. I know valentines day is a hallmark made up holiday that is basically “single awareness day” but it’s certainly not “female entitlement day”.
I’m making a red velvet cake for Valentine’s Day, because I’m a misandrist. Well, no, the fact I’m not going to SHARE that red velvet cake with any males makes me a misandrist, technically. You can bake a cake without misandry, I think. Not that I’ve ever tried.
@Jonathan,
Nobody needs to look hard for your misogynist drivel. It’s not like it’s hiding in the deep dark Ocean where only Jacques Cousteau could find it.
Oh and I’m the official A Voice for Mice! *squeeeeek!’ All my female house mice are practicing their Gynomus Musculis Valentinus Dominus Day today. They want mancheeze!
I’ve never dated in a paying-way (ie. meals with Mr K are different) and when it comes to eating out with a friend, I pay for what I have, exactly the same as when I’m eating alone.
Amazing how straightforward that is.
@Octo:
I only brought it up because your previous comment:
stated that women who were taken out to dinner, etc, didn’t “give”. My only point was that if the man takes the woman out to dinner, the woman is also giving up time and money (outfit, shoes, make-up, products) for this event.
It doesn’t matter whether I think this is sexist or not, all that matters is that you were wrong in your previous comment about women not giving.
@Kiwi: All that matters is that I was wrong? Well, okay, if it’s *that* important to you… :p
But I would like to mention that to some degree (I know this is all usually a bit more complicated for women) men invest into this stuff, too, so reciprocality already exists there to a degree. However, eh, that’s technical details. Either way, it backs up my point that traditional Valentine’s Day customs are bad, though maybe not as widespread and hence not as problematic as I might make them out to be here 😉
@greenday Yeah, fucked up gender roles is the point. But you’re right to point that such attitudes often come together. Both sides of the “equation” here are bad, of course.
Just popping in to say happy valentine’s day to everybody. Hugs for those who want and/or need them. Also my ass seems to be nearly fully healed YAY!
Dear Shitlord,
Your little screed was profound. Some men don’t like fatties. And women being in charge of their own lives is a terrible horror. What else, errr, all women want men to give them ponies. Um yeah, so…(sarcasm off)
Commercialism drives Valentines Day, and yes, it uses sexism to do it — kind of like the wedding industry. How did you miss that? How many ex’s asked you for a pony by the way? I dunno, it sounds like you think all women are whores (that’s fucked) and most men are rich (that’s not factual). What dimension do you live in, little shit lord?
Oh, let us know when you snag your first book deal. *snicker*
I once dated a woman who made a giant deal out of Valentine’s day, and got really mad at me when the flowers I ordered for her didn’t arrive at her workplace on V-day, even though (as I explained to her) the place I had gotten them from had guaranteed that they would.
I broke up with her shortly afterwards, in part because I didn’t want to be dating someone like that.
I didn’t turn that experience into an excuse to join a movement devoted to hating women.
Because no one was forcing me to date her, and in fact almost all of the women I’ve ever dated have wanted to go dutch. I’ve paid for a couple of women’s dinners; a couple of women have paid for my dinners. One woman paid half my plane ticket so I could fly halfway across the country to see her.
The descriptions of the horrible “gynocentric” dating world that I see from MRAs all the time — from Warren Farrell to Mr. Taylor here — bear no resemblance to the world I inhabit.
Speaking of the sweeping romance of consumerism, here’s a quote about one of the most unfortunately successful marketing campaigns of last century. Google “don’t buy diamonds” or “blood diamond” if you don’t know why it would be great if diamond engagement rings would go out of style again.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Engagement_ring
Here’s an old but good Atlantic article about diamonds, marketing, gender roles and De Beers.
http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/1982/02/have-you-ever-tried-to-sell-a-diamond/304575/?single_page=true
I never wanted a pony when I was five, or at any other age, either. And I’ve never expected jewelry, flowers, candy or even a card on this day from anyone, at least since I was 12 years old.
Where are all these “spoiled princesses”, I wonder? Because I haven’t met many women who even remotely fit the description given by our idiotic interlocutor…
I had not seen this before until an alt version was linked to me (for Ingress):
http://www.pophangover.com/4641/the-official-internet-butthurt-complaint-form/
Perhaps Jonathan would like to fill it out.
It’s Valentine’s Day? Oh, yeah, I guess it is.
The Significant Other’s birthday is on the 13th, so we always forget this day even exists. We just get all our lovin’ in the day before.
As for this guy’s assumption that the female gender is populated with spoiled little princesses who always wanted their pony, I’m guessing his sample size for that survey was like, 1. The only date he ever had.
Fuck, I have to stop assuming that your titles are exaggeration. Some dude literally complained about the Google conversation hearts. Going to curl up and eat chocolate now.
@Octo – Who are you fighting with, buddy? I’m not sure what you want anyone here to say to your ‘points,’ such as they are. You’re not exactly in the hive of scum and villainy when it comes to perpetuating fucked up, patriarchal standards. In fact, I would venture to guess most of us are actively involved in tearing them down. Go harass some lady who is actually having a tantrum over her boyfriend not appropriately showering her in diamonds today or something.
Today’s random fact — Brilliant Earth sells conflict-free ethically sourced diamonds and diamond rings (some other stuff too, including pearls)
Because yeah, De Beers can fuck off, but OOOOH SHINY!!
@kiwigirl
We need to make a special form for the Manosphere.
Re engagement rings: mine sits permanently in my jewelry box, which is where it’s been ever since I heard about the way they were produced and the ad campaign thingy. As far as I’m concerned the ring isn’t important, the hand that wears it is. So I wear anything pretty on the third finger of my left hand.
Re paying for dates: even when Mr S and I were dating he never paid for my food. I often paid for his because he was a penniless student and I was a student living with parents with a part time job. I always felt that if I permitted a man to buy me dinner he’d expect me to pay him back with sex and there was no way I was playing that game! Some of them would get quite annoyed. One of them actually caused a scene in a restaurant. I walked off and I haven’t seen him since. That was thirty five years ago.
But the story about Mr right wasn’t about his looks, or even about his money. It was about him being nice and caring.
If a female gives a male scented fucking candles on valentine’s day, does the universe explode?
And I love some people’s fascination with chocolate – I can only stomach the stuff about once a month. And then I crave dark cooking chocolate. My downfall is Jelly Belly jellybeans (no gelatin, yay!). I wish Bassets would invent the vegetarian jellybaby as I -really- miss those.
It’s pretty misandric to think the male equivalent of “I want a partner who’s right for me” is “No fat chicks.” MRAs have such a low opinion of men.