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Some of the comments I don’t let through

How comments are moderated at Man Boobz.
How comments are moderated at Man Boobz.

So I had to re-ban a couple of long-banned trolls today, who had returned with new names and slightly different IP addresses but who gave themselves away with their behavior. And that got me thinking about the people — well, the MRAs and PUAs and other such charming folks — who regularly denounce me as an evil censor of FREE SPEECH.

In fact, when I ban people, I do so for good reasons: one of the two trolls I banned today was a longtime MRAish commenter here who eventually creeped everyone out by boasting about having sex with underage prostitutes; the other was a man of many sockpuppets known for angry, abusive meltdowns full of slurs.

Anyway, so I thought I’d give you all a glimpse into my “trash” folder. Here’s a sampling of comments from would-be first time commenters at Man Boobz that I felt would not add anything to the discourse here. But in the interests of FREE SPEECH I thought I’d give these “ideas” an airing today.

TRIGGER WARNING for violent and offensive language. (Sorry about the quality of the last two; you can click on them to see larger versions.)

You people are such wankers. MGTOW is the best thing that ever happened. Personally, i despise women and would gladly see them all die horribly. This site is not only run bu a pathetic, wretched little scum, but populated by ones as well.Sad to say. But I see many good men get hurt by women. I feel not one drop of sympathy for any women who gets hurt, Beatin up or treated like shit. Cheers you dumb bitch.censored1censored2

Not all of the comments I trash are quite this awful. Some are only mildly violent or abusive. I tend to be a bit picky with people’s first comments, assuming that if someone posts a shitty first comment it’s not likely to get any better after that. There are a few banned commenters who stop by and try to post anyway, including one fellow who leaves endless comments trying to prove, as far as I can tell, that teenage girls are objectively hotter than women in their twenties and older.

And, of course, there are comments targeting individual women, whether these are giant cut-and-pasted rants about Anita Sarkeesian, vaguely threatening remarks aimed at other well-known internet feminists, or bizarre sexual comments about female MRAs from fans of theirs.

Once in a while I will get a comment from a feminist that resorts to violent language; I don’t let those comments through either.

And then there are the pictures people try to post in the comments. Below, one of the ones I actually let through, depicting me in a dress with some extremely tall dude. A quick Google image search reveals that it was originally posted online by regular A Voice for Men contributor Janet Bloomfield, in a blog post of hers from last year on Disney princesses. Stay classy, Men’s “Human Rights” Movement!

I don't actually own a dress like this.
I don’t actually own a dress like this.

Anyway, the pictures I don’t let through are worse.

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fromafar2013
10 years ago

@ Shiraz, the bread is nice. I actually don’t know what made me sick, especially since I’m a vegetarian, limits me to, like, two sandwiches.

@ op4tm I’m on siren. Sad face 🙁 I don’t make friends in game, but I have one irl friend I play with sometimes. I’m working my way to monk. One level left in pugilist and five in lancer. Yay! I can’t even imagine capping all adv classes! Leveling past 25 is a mega pain in the ass!

opium4themasses
10 years ago

@fromafar I don’t know if you are we’ll established yet, but you and your friend could transfer. I have a fun group in my free company and link shells if you wanted to make the move. One thing I love about FF is the tendency to have a more mixed gender player base. So far the amount of MRA bullshit I see from players is much, much lower than gaming in general. Though there is still anti-Sarkeesian stuff. (There are definitely issues with gender, but the ingame language is more inclusive.)

vaiyt
10 years ago

“I love how evo-psych explanations always assume a rigid gender binary, modern Western culture, and patriarchy for all of history. ”

Not even modern Western culture – modern, Western, developed, white and rich culture.

LBT
LBT
10 years ago

RE: sparky

Basically, I feel every time dude says “men prefer,” “men think,” “men do,” what he REALLY means is, “I prefer,” “I think,” “I do.”

Dude, just because YOU believe this shit doesn’t mean other men do. Leave me and non-creepers out of your stupid little bullshit.

I mean, if we’re going to use this bullshit, than OBVIOUSLY Japanese yaoi teaches us that all women in the world prefer thin, femme, queer men. Obviously this is because they biologically see these men as good loving providers, allowing them to ride the alpha cock carousel and then chain these poor queer men into platonic marriages. I know this because of my RESEARCHES. *points to ass*

Robert
Robert
10 years ago

LBT, good point. I believe that one of the blessings of having sexytimes preferences that are not reified by the majority/dominant culture (for me, at least) is that I had to recognize that what I personally found appealing was not a universal truth.

Glad I don’t have to diagram THAT sentence.

LBT
LBT
10 years ago

RE: Robert

Yup, basically. I’m a trans gay man who’s only been attracted to a handful of people, so I had it hammered in pretty fast that my tastes do not equal the world’s. Atomo over there needs to go hang out with some different people, you ask me.

kittehserf
10 years ago

I mean, if we’re going to use this bullshit, than OBVIOUSLY Japanese yaoi teaches us that all women in the world prefer thin, femme, queer men.

… can I customise that to bi and with a touch of the old love-handles? 😉

kittehserf
10 years ago

Drat, hit reply too soon.

I had to recognize that what I personally found appealing was not a universal truth.

I got that even without being outside the opposite-sex thing. I was astonished when other people said they thought Mr K’s handsome, because he’s so far from the type of male beauty presented by Hollywood or magazines (which I find mostly very unappealing).

LBT
LBT
10 years ago

RE: Kittehs

Yeah, while I actually have a minor dislike of abs, which is apparently unthinkable here. (I swear, I don’t know why! They just don’t do it for me!)

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

Can I customize to bi or straight both acceptable, but keep the abs? And add that long hair, while not essential, is highly preferred, but yaoi-style relationship dynamics are highly discouraged?

The mainstream American idea of what’s hot in men has always been so far from what I prefer that, yep, you learn pretty early not to universalize your own preferences. You also learn that men who’re really attached to the idea of the mainstream preferences being universal will a. get angry with you for having preferences at all and then b. assume you’re lying about them.

Shiraz
Shiraz
10 years ago

Yeah. “…get angry with you,” then accuse you of being a shallow bitch.
Then there’s that phenomena of watching a film in mixed company, seeing an attractive male and saying something like, “Wow, he’s cute.” Only to have someone in the same room reply sneeringly, “Pffft. He’s gay.” What the fuck is that, anyway?

kittehserf
10 years ago

Cassandra, you can have all the abs I don’t want, too. And the pecs … I really, really dislike the hugely built-up chest thing. I like more or less straight up and down, but a soft line, and sloping shoulders, not straight ones, and not really wide ones. The inverted carrot figure doesn’t do it for me.

Long hair dark and moustache are a must. Beard’s optional but it has to be minimal and neat, not sproiking out everywhere.

OT I am loving my new glasses.

kittehserf
10 years ago

Shiraz – that sort of shit makes me glad I have the easy way out of saying “He’s not him” about anyone else at all. Being single-target has various advantages!

I don’t get the “he’s gay” thing either. Do they think finding a guy attractive has anything to do with whether the opportunity for sex exists, or whether one would act on it if it did?

Argenti Aertheri
10 years ago

“Btw, jeetyet?”

I have not! Born and breed in CT, went to visit a friend at Pitt and made it my goal in life to get in, succeeded and very nearly chose homeless there over moving back to CT, but I couldn’t find a new home for my fish. Salads need french fries, this is a thing no one up here gets! Also, no Yeung Ying, and their Black and Tan is the only beer I like! (Pecunium, pick some up for me, you can get it there and I can’t!) Definitrly S’liberty, but South Oakland.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

Huge pecs make me feel like I should offer to lend the bearer a bra, so no, someone else can have those. I do like muscle definition, just not bulk. Skinny but toned hits the sweet spot for me. I love the inverted triangle torso with the big shoulders and the tiny hips.

Bets on how long it will be before some dudebro spots this conversation and complains? I used to get guys yelling at me about my icon (sexy shirtless dude playing a bass) on Jezebel all the time.

kittehserf
10 years ago

Yeah, “put on a bra” is my reaction to them, too.

Slim-to-skinny used to be my thing, but now it’s middle-aged-comfy. Oddly enough my tastes change to whatever Mr currently looks like. 😛

Sexy shirtless dude playing bass? Did he have long hair? ::drools::

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

Skinny but a bit toned pretty boys have always been my thing. Their preferred age range has changed along with mine, but other than that…yeah, I have a type.

I don’t have the icon any more, but it was a cropped version of this pic.

http://imgur.com/TkyxzpX

Wow, his face looks terrible there though. Must have had a cold, he’s all puffy.

Bina
10 years ago

Yeah. “…get angry with you,” then accuse you of being a shallow bitch.
Then there’s that phenomena of watching a film in mixed company, seeing an attractive male and saying something like, “Wow, he’s cute.” Only to have someone in the same room reply sneeringly, “Pffft. He’s gay.” What the fuck is that, anyway?

Bitterness. And a ham-handed attempt to distract one from the “competition”.

Bina
10 years ago

BTW, if there’s such a thing as a heterosexual twink, I would love one.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

There are tons of hetero twinks, you just have to know where to look.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

“What the fuck is that, anyway?”

Raging insecurity.

LBT
LBT
10 years ago

Heh, while I care less about muscle definition, but prefer bulk. I was rather dismayed to find that I find young John Goodman quite the handsome man.

Ah well. The travails of being gay, I suppose.

kittehserf
10 years ago

I can understand that. I’m finding Roger Allam quite handsome – partly because I’m seeing him playing the very likable Fred Thursday.

LBT
LBT
10 years ago

Who’s Fred Thursday?

kittehserf
10 years ago

He’s Morse’s boss in Endeavour – Inspector Fred Thursday. Lovely character who has a mean right hook with villains.