Thank you all. We are all fighting off colds on top of being across state from him so I’m coming to peace with the fact that I’m not going to see him again.We had my father in law hold the phone up to him so we could tell him that we love him and it’s ok to let go. He’s been fighting so hard to hold on and he has held on much longer then any of his doctors thought.
And I was running errands and a rock kicked up and cracked my windshield. F’ing really high on the list of shit I didn’t need today. Hopefully it won’t spread since I can’t get anyone to fix it until Monday.
I need a nap
serrana
10 years ago
Sam-I-Was?, all the hugs from me too. I’m sorry about your uncle. I hope you had a good nap.
FWIW, I’ve Mr. S and I have had tons of cracks in windshields and they’ve never been an emergency. They’ll spread slowly and eventually they get into the driver’s line of sight and then you have replace them, but it’s usually been at least a year before that happened. Those crack repair places have never helped in the long run though.
hellkell
10 years ago
I’m sorry about your uncle, Sam-I-Was.
If you’ve got glass coverage and a mobile glass repair place, they can probably come out on a Sunday with no fuss. I once woke up to a branch sticking out of my driver’s side window after a bad storm (damn car looked impaled), and it was pretty cool see them replace it.
gillyrosebee
10 years ago
Well, damn. Granted this isn’t as significant as other folks’ troubles, but the jackass who just begged off and asked to reschedule a date for the third time (this time he did it with only about an hour before we were supposed to meet) is now posting on Twitter about how horrible it is to be single and have no one to hang out with on a Saturday night…
Kim
10 years ago
I have a word question. Does anyone know what you call it when you do a triplet using 3 words that mean the same thing, just one positive, one neutral and one negative? For eg “I am forthright. You are opinionated. He is an arsehole.”
I tried googling “adjective triplets” but apparantly that is already a thing.
hellkell
10 years ago
gillyrosebee: you could tweet him that cancelling plans is why he’s alone. But then I am evil.
He sounds like a dude who’s ore into pity-parties than actually doing something about his situation.
titianblue
10 years ago
@gillyrosebee What an ass! So are you going to:
a. Agree to a third date but not turn up.
b. Point out to him on Twitter than he’s an ass who will forever spend Saturday nights alone.
c. Never answer any of his calls or messages until he slopes back under the rock from whence he crawled?
gillyrosebee – seconding hellkell’s and titianblue’s ideas. 😈
Sam-I-Was?, I’m glad you got to speak to your uncle, and sorry about the damn rock and windscreen. Extra hugs with a free layer of cat furs for you.
gillyrosebee
10 years ago
I keep my twitter account as nondescript as possible because it’s primarily job related, but I did whip him an email that I would in fact be busy on the day he proposed for a reschedule, and on the day after that, and if he happened to find a spare moment sometime in his busy schedule of tweeting about all the women, whoops “chicks,” who won’t give a good, working class guy like him (he’s a freaking sushi chef, for fuck’s sake, it’s not like he works construction or something) the time of day and how he’d have been better off spending all the money he’s devoted to dating on prostit…,. whoops on “wh*res,” that he should give me a call so that I could tell him that I would, in fact, be busy then as well.
The other two times I gave him a pass, as he did email a day or so before the actual date, giving me plenty of time to make other plans. This time he emailed at a little before 6, and then started posting pictures of himself getting drunk and watching basketball at a really grotty local bar.
Meh. I’m just pissed that he waited till the last minute to blow me off. Housemate is downtown with “the boys” tonight and I barely have any beer in the house!
titianblue
10 years ago
Outstanding response, Gillyrosebee. Sending you virtual beer.
gillyrosebee
10 years ago
Reason #472 that Housemate is awesome? I texted him with the story, and his response was “All my beer r belong 2 U. Case in bsmt.”
Tomorrow, I will shop. For tonight, there will be beer, and I think I even have some popcorn. Now all I need is a troll to kick…
Viscaria
10 years ago
Cancer sucks so much. I’m sorry, Sam-I-Was.
Re: Men behaving badly on social media… I posted something on Facebook the other day about the creep who sat beside me on the bus and made me feel really unsafe. I didn’t mention a lot of details but I did say the experience was frightening for me, and that it reminded me of even scarier transit creeps I encountered in my teens.
My male friend chimed in to say that I would get over my bus “anxieties” if only I were to spend a little time on the Japanese transit system. He threw in one of these :D. I told him off pretty hard. Told him that being uncomfortable with strangers trying to touch me is perfectly reasonable and does not require fixing, and that the rate of sexual assault on Japanese transit systems is not a fucking joke. And I told him that his grinning face was really inappropriate He said:
Oh. Yeah, that’s not what I meant.
😀
The shitty part (beyond the fact that he’s known me half our lives) is that he claims to be a feminist. Weirdly his feminism seems to focus on how women should transform their bodies to his tastes — but by weightlifting, rather than dieting. Yeah, that’s way better. Or how slut shaming is really, really, really bad. Women should feel totally free to have sex with himother women in front of him their choice of partners as much as they want. Sexual liberation is so important for him The Movement.
gillyrosebee
10 years ago
My sympathies, Viscaria. I’m getting kinda tired of the guys I meet who call themselves ‘feminists’ because they are four square behind the idea that women should feel free to have lots and lots and lots of sex without any strings or commitment or anything like that, but who couldn’t possibly be less concerned about women’s access to a wide range of health services, or equal treatment under the law, or personal safety, or equal treatment economically, or, or, or…
I mean, I’m all for owning your sexual life without any shame or discrimination, but there are a few other things that I’m concerned about and expect support from my self-described allies for!
Argh, my eyes just rolled out under the desk reading that, Viscaria.
Let me guess, Mr Really Totes Feminist also thinks women who aren’t interested in sex with him/for his entertainment just need to loosen up, stop being so uptight, stop pretending asexuality is real, blah, blah, blah.
Also, has Mr Really Totes Feminist read Richard Fucking Dawkins’s Dear Muslima letter? Because he’s doing exactly the same thing. “What have you got to be worried about? Women in [fill in country full of THOSE people of choice] have real problems!”
gilyrosebee – yeah, those guys call themselves feminists but they’re nothing more than second-generation versions of the so-called sexual revolution, which just left women refused the right to say no as well as refused the right to say yes.
Viscaria
10 years ago
Also, has Mr Really Totes Feminist read Richard Fucking Dawkins’s Dear Muslima letter? Because he’s doing exactly the same thing. “What have you got to be worried about? Women in [fill in country full of THOSE people of choice] have real problems!”
I actually think it was more of a case of him reading “I felt like my boundaries were being ignored today and it was scary” as “someone sat too close to me and I’m overreacting.” I think when he mentioned transit systems in Japan he wasn’t even considering sexual assault because that’s just so not on his radar like, at all. That’s all infuriating enough, but then when I put it on his radar he showed absolutely no contrition and deliberately needled me again with the ridiculous smiley face. Ugh.
It does sound the same sort of thing. Woman feeling uncomfortable about her boundaries being ignored (which is part of the sexual assault spectrum) = her overreacting. That’s basically what shiteater Dawkins said, even though he brought violent assault (FGM) into it and Mr Bozo Pretend Feminist didn’t.
eli
10 years ago
Thank you so much for everyone who helped me last month. Thank you so much. Thank you, thank you.
We Hunted The Mammoth
Thank you all. We are all fighting off colds on top of being across state from him so I’m coming to peace with the fact that I’m not going to see him again.We had my father in law hold the phone up to him so we could tell him that we love him and it’s ok to let go. He’s been fighting so hard to hold on and he has held on much longer then any of his doctors thought.
And I was running errands and a rock kicked up and cracked my windshield. F’ing really high on the list of shit I didn’t need today. Hopefully it won’t spread since I can’t get anyone to fix it until Monday.
I need a nap
Sam-I-Was?, all the hugs from me too. I’m sorry about your uncle. I hope you had a good nap.
FWIW, I’ve Mr. S and I have had tons of cracks in windshields and they’ve never been an emergency. They’ll spread slowly and eventually they get into the driver’s line of sight and then you have replace them, but it’s usually been at least a year before that happened. Those crack repair places have never helped in the long run though.
I’m sorry about your uncle, Sam-I-Was.
If you’ve got glass coverage and a mobile glass repair place, they can probably come out on a Sunday with no fuss. I once woke up to a branch sticking out of my driver’s side window after a bad storm (damn car looked impaled), and it was pretty cool see them replace it.
Well, damn. Granted this isn’t as significant as other folks’ troubles, but the jackass who just begged off and asked to reschedule a date for the third time (this time he did it with only about an hour before we were supposed to meet) is now posting on Twitter about how horrible it is to be single and have no one to hang out with on a Saturday night…
I have a word question. Does anyone know what you call it when you do a triplet using 3 words that mean the same thing, just one positive, one neutral and one negative? For eg “I am forthright. You are opinionated. He is an arsehole.”
I tried googling “adjective triplets” but apparantly that is already a thing.
gillyrosebee: you could tweet him that cancelling plans is why he’s alone. But then I am evil.
He sounds like a dude who’s ore into pity-parties than actually doing something about his situation.
@gillyrosebee What an ass! So are you going to:
a. Agree to a third date but not turn up.
b. Point out to him on Twitter than he’s an ass who will forever spend Saturday nights alone.
c. Never answer any of his calls or messages until he slopes back under the rock from whence he crawled?
Ninja’d by Hellkell. :-p
gillyrosebee – seconding hellkell’s and titianblue’s ideas. 😈
Sam-I-Was?, I’m glad you got to speak to your uncle, and sorry about the damn rock and windscreen. Extra hugs with a free layer of cat furs for you.
I keep my twitter account as nondescript as possible because it’s primarily job related, but I did whip him an email that I would in fact be busy on the day he proposed for a reschedule, and on the day after that, and if he happened to find a spare moment sometime in his busy schedule of tweeting about all the women, whoops “chicks,” who won’t give a good, working class guy like him (he’s a freaking sushi chef, for fuck’s sake, it’s not like he works construction or something) the time of day and how he’d have been better off spending all the money he’s devoted to dating on prostit…,. whoops on “wh*res,” that he should give me a call so that I could tell him that I would, in fact, be busy then as well.
The other two times I gave him a pass, as he did email a day or so before the actual date, giving me plenty of time to make other plans. This time he emailed at a little before 6, and then started posting pictures of himself getting drunk and watching basketball at a really grotty local bar.
Meh. I’m just pissed that he waited till the last minute to blow me off. Housemate is downtown with “the boys” tonight and I barely have any beer in the house!
Outstanding response, Gillyrosebee. Sending you virtual beer.
Reason #472 that Housemate is awesome? I texted him with the story, and his response was “All my beer r belong 2 U. Case in bsmt.”
Tomorrow, I will shop. For tonight, there will be beer, and I think I even have some popcorn. Now all I need is a troll to kick…
Cancer sucks so much. I’m sorry, Sam-I-Was.
Re: Men behaving badly on social media… I posted something on Facebook the other day about the creep who sat beside me on the bus and made me feel really unsafe. I didn’t mention a lot of details but I did say the experience was frightening for me, and that it reminded me of even scarier transit creeps I encountered in my teens.
My male friend chimed in to say that I would get over my bus “anxieties” if only I were to spend a little time on the Japanese transit system. He threw in one of these :D. I told him off pretty hard. Told him that being uncomfortable with strangers trying to touch me is perfectly reasonable and does not require fixing, and that the rate of sexual assault on Japanese transit systems is not a fucking joke. And I told him that his grinning face was really inappropriate He said:
Oh. Yeah, that’s not what I meant.
😀
The shitty part (beyond the fact that he’s known me half our lives) is that he claims to be a feminist. Weirdly his feminism seems to focus on how women should transform their bodies to his tastes — but by weightlifting, rather than dieting. Yeah, that’s way better. Or how slut shaming is really, really, really bad. Women should feel totally free to have sex with
himother women in front of himtheir choice of partners as much as they want. Sexual liberation is so important forhimThe Movement.My sympathies, Viscaria. I’m getting kinda tired of the guys I meet who call themselves ‘feminists’ because they are four square behind the idea that women should feel free to have lots and lots and lots of sex without any strings or commitment or anything like that, but who couldn’t possibly be less concerned about women’s access to a wide range of health services, or equal treatment under the law, or personal safety, or equal treatment economically, or, or, or…
I mean, I’m all for owning your sexual life without any shame or discrimination, but there are a few other things that I’m concerned about and expect support from my self-described allies for!
Argh, my eyes just rolled out under the desk reading that, Viscaria.
Let me guess, Mr Really Totes Feminist also thinks women who aren’t interested in sex with him/for his entertainment just need to loosen up, stop being so uptight, stop pretending asexuality is real, blah, blah, blah.
Also, has Mr Really Totes Feminist read Richard Fucking Dawkins’s Dear Muslima letter? Because he’s doing exactly the same thing. “What have you got to be worried about? Women in [fill in country full of THOSE people of choice] have real problems!”
::spits::
gilyrosebee – yeah, those guys call themselves feminists but they’re nothing more than second-generation versions of the so-called sexual revolution, which just left women refused the right to say no as well as refused the right to say yes.
I actually think it was more of a case of him reading “I felt like my boundaries were being ignored today and it was scary” as “someone sat too close to me and I’m overreacting.” I think when he mentioned transit systems in Japan he wasn’t even considering sexual assault because that’s just so not on his radar like, at all. That’s all infuriating enough, but then when I put it on his radar he showed absolutely no contrition and deliberately needled me again with the ridiculous smiley face. Ugh.
It does sound the same sort of thing. Woman feeling uncomfortable about her boundaries being ignored (which is part of the sexual assault spectrum) = her overreacting. That’s basically what shiteater Dawkins said, even though he brought violent assault (FGM) into it and Mr Bozo Pretend Feminist didn’t.
Thank you so much for everyone who helped me last month. Thank you so much. Thank you, thank you.
How’s everything going, eli?
I put my baby down today. He was ready. it was time. I’m still so sad.
I’ve not been around or in other threads, but I still wanted to say thanks to everyone who was helping me when I wasn’t sure.
Oh eli, I’m so sorry. All the hugs.
My condolences, eli. :<
Is that our Ally with a nice new snazzy avatar?