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So over on A Voice for Men, young Jason Gregory seems faintly jealous that young women who put up dating profiles online tend to get flooded with messages — and the occasional dick pic — from horny guys.
F]ree cock is everywhere. Men give it away like it’s worthless. … I doubt that it is unusual at all for a woman to get 300 messages in her inbox from men who are desperate for female affection, approval, and sex. There is no doubt in my mind that men send “dick-pics” and clamor, bother, and sometimes harass women for their affections and attentions.
But Jason feels no sympathy for young women who put up profiles hoping to meet some nice young fellow who’s also into Sherlock and Neil Gaiman and Indian food and instead get messages from guys who introduce themselves by expressing a desire to ejaculate in their hair.
No, Jason is angry because he’s convinced all these offers of “free cock” only serve to make the women of the world into snooty-stuck stuck-up so-and-sos who think they’re all that and a folder full of dick pics.
All you men who give it away, all you do is reinforce the entitlement mentality of women who believe that their being present is plenty. You reinforce the idea that women don’t owe anything to the relationship—that they deserve a free-ride of cocks and that they don’t even have to break a sweat.
Jason, I should add, means this last bit literally. He’s resentful that when he allegedly engages in the act of coitus he has to do all the work while his alleged partners allegedly lie there like inflatable love-dolls.
Anyhoo,.Jason has a plan to take these stuck-up ladies down a peg or two: A cock strike.
Yep, he wants men to start saying “no” to women who are interested in them, just to see how they like it. But he doesn’t want them to just say no. He wants them to be giant dicks about it.
Try telling a girl no. Tell her, after she makes it clear that she wants your cock, that you’re not interested in giving it to her. Tell her that she isn’t interesting, that her soul is dog-shit and that she has nothing to offer other than boobs and booty, that she is a piece of shit and a total failure as a human being, that you don’t find her attractive and that she isn’t even good enough to be a cum-bucket. Tell her that she is never going to be any good at sucking cock and that she needs to stop pretending that she is doing any favors and learn to compensate for her inadequacies by becoming “kinky.” Tell her that her vapid life of shoes and pop-culture and materialism are soulless pursuits of dog-shit. Watch what happens. If you Jez-ladies wanna know what “hostile” means, see this rejected woman.
Emphasis mine.
A Voice for Men, you may recall, sees itself as leading the most important civil rights movement of the 21st century. I am sure Jason Gregory’s post here will be remembered alongside Martin Luther King’s Letter from a Birmingham Jail as a classic in civil rights literature.
EDIT: I added a couple more “allegedlys” to a sentence I thought needed them.
As a longtime lurker & random commenter (I don’t think that’s a real word), I don’t think of the regulars as ‘cliquey’. They’re too random and friendly for that – and by random, I mean being of different genders/sexes/classes/races/etc.
re: calling out ableism. In my family, we use ‘crazy’ like it’s meant in jazz-era slang – something awesome and out of this world. (Actually, as a result of that, I once thought someone was complementing me when they were in fact being an asshole. Oh well). Using ‘crazy’ as a positive adjective doesn’t bother me (but I’m fine with leaving it alone here).
However.
Using a minority group’s descriptive words as a slur is BAD. Calling an asshole ‘crazy’ means you see ‘crazy’ as a slur. And that’s where the problem is.
I haven’t seen Ithiliana lately, either. I also miss Some Gal Not Bored At All and Fade. They haven’t been here in ages.
There’s a certain grim amusement to be had by putting the conversation in this thread side by side with the conversation in the other thread in response to catgirl’s request for advice. I’ve been kind of wondering if anyone is going to show up on that one and complain that some of us are being horrible bullies for strongly disagreeing with MEZ’s comment, especially since there were multiple people who did.
“re: calling out ableism. In my family, we use ‘crazy’ like it’s meant in jazz-era slang – something awesome and out of this world. (Actually, as a result of that, I once thought someone was complementing me when they were in fact being an asshole. Oh well). Using ‘crazy’ as a positive adjective doesn’t bother me (but I’m fine with leaving it alone here).”
I also say “crazy” when I mean “that’s awesome!”. People have given me weird looks before and I’ve had to explain myself. I’m not sure where I picked that up from. . .
Oh fuck you, Blockquote Monster. What did I do this time?
Argenti: Pecunium re: water torture — I was thinking the proverbial Chinese water torture which, if it’s actually a thing, is described as a drip, just a drip, meant to drive you slowly insane.
Yes, I know, and that’s what I was talking about. That description is from bad translations/poor descriptions. It was always a form of waterboarding.
I read the entire Stalking Ms Denko thread. To quote Machine Man from Doom Patrol, “my robot brain needs beer.” The scary part, for me, is realizing how plausible it all is. “She told me not to call or email her any more. Does that mean she wants me to come over to her house?”
Still clicking through on the Denko Saga. Just arrived at Part 4. What a friggin’ rabbit hole! And now I feel a creepy little song coming on…
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YyZVS_b6r4E&w=480&h=360]
“Yes, I know, and that’s what I was talking about. That description is from bad translations/poor descriptions. It was always a form of waterboarding.”
Ah okay, so it only existed in popular opinion (er? Only exists in that people think it does? You know what I mean I think)
I know Ithilana a teensy bit in another context, and she told me she’s mostly over at the Free Thought blogs these days.
Are we talking about orchids?
I have nine at the moment. 7 Phalaenopsis (probably actually all Phalaenopsis/Miltonia, crosses, as that’s the big family of “easy keepers” which are readily available), one Oncidium/Odontoglossum cross, and a non-specific ondtoglossum cross, I think with Coelogyne.
I only started collecting them again a year ago. So far the only one to blossom (after purchase; as most are sold in bloom, unless you can go to an orchid nursey, such as the ones on the Calif. Central Coast) is the one I bought out of bloom (the Oncidium/Odontoglossum).
But they look lovely on the shelf above the sink, and we shall see what comes of them as they grow. I might even try to cross them.
Did I tell you I collapsed the terrarium lid and snapped the main branch on the crassula? I may end up with two decently sized crassulas as the top bit doesn’t seem to be dying on me.
Thankfully I somehow missed everything else in there! Like, the hinge V’ed and slid between African violets. I (we since one of those is yours) got fucking lucky.
Wow, the Denko threads took me back.
In Ye Olden Days before computers I had a stalker ex who would call constantly. Threats, rambling, screaming- I’d hang up, he’d call back. So I got a friend to go with me to report it to the police. You had to have a police request for a trap to be put on the phone, if I recall. And the cops were kind of ‘Yeah, okay, track the time and type of call and bring us back the log in two weeks and we’ll match it to the trap report and go from there.’
Five days later I called the detectives and said ‘Is 35-40 calls in 1 hour for up to 5 hours at a time enough to report or should I go buy another notebook?’
Cue shocked silence followed by cop announcing they’d be right over, my door was locked, right?
You better believe my damn door was locked. They actually sent a detective to talk to me while the patrol cops went out and arrested him and took him to lock up. Where he sat for two weeks until the hearing.
The public defender tried to ask for bail and the judge looked at him like he’d grown a second head. The public defender then tried to argue for time served and no fine because the defendant didn’t have a job.
In very short declarative sentences the judge suggested that while the defendant was sitting in jail he could think about the fact that since he was forbidden from ever contacting me again he’d have loads of time to look for work. If he could find a job that would allow for his parole officer meetings and his therapy sessions, that is. When the defender opened his mouth to reply the judge picked up the file from the phone company and let it fall to the desk with an audible thump.
And then he made the lawyer stop talking and walked my stalker ex through saying exactly what he’d done, exactly how very wrong that was, how he was really trulio sorry and would never ever even get within 50 feet of me in a public place or open his mouth to say anything to me ever again.
The only way it could have been better was if the judge had ordered that I got a pony and ice cream.
Holy shit, oraclenine. 😯
Only time I ever had a phone pest it was a kid, way back when I was a teenager too. That’s kid as in younger than me, some little twit being a pest while the parents weren’t around, screaming down the phone and so on.
I fixed it by blowing a referee’s whistle next to the mouthpiece. Kid screamed how they were gonna tell their mum on me … and never rang back.
Kitteh — I love that, I had a neighbor as a kid who’d taunted me for the last fucking time, so I took off after him. Now, this kid was like greased lightening, he figured he could out run me, problem is my knees weren’t shit yet and even now I can sprint (I just pay for it later). He made it to his door with me maybe 5′ behind and was all “I’m telling my mother” to which I said, in my calmest voice “okay, but tell her why I’m chasing you”.
Yeah, he knocked it off real fast after that.
Oraclenine — you deserved that pony and ice cream, nobody should have to put up with that shit.
@Oraclenine
pony:
http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/ad/b3/6a/adb36adc389fb74c98842de3f399bfa5.jpg
ice cream:
http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/736x/90/0d/81/900d818aed5ac53149e68093a06ebeb6.jpg
A pony! And ice cream!
Ya’ll are so kind.
Evidently, given the fact it was a middling sized town (and a less enlightened age) the whole thing was so over the top it kind of spooked the cops. I’d gone from freaked the hell out to a kind of icy calm, which also kind of spooked them.
Argenti – high fives! 🙂
I’ve been lurking here on and off for several years, but don’t comment much. I think ‘cliquey’ has negative connotations, but yeah sometimes I feel like I shouldn’t comment because you all know each other and that new people have to really ‘prove’ themselves. But that’s OK, because well, a lot of you do know and talk to each other here a whole lot, and there is steady stream of crummy trolls. So, whatever. Plus recently(ish) the commentariat do seem somewhat more welcoming than a few years ago.
Also, orchids. Yes please. Cacti and succulents are my True Plant Loves but I have a modest but growing orchid collection, mostly Phals and Onc hybrids, as natural light in my house is limited and I can’t fit more cacti in the light windows. I’m pleased to say I’ve got everything to reflower at least once 😀 And they don’t leave me full of spines evry time I need to do any maintainence which is nice.
Oof oraclenine, I’m sorry you had to deal with that, and you deserve all the ponies and ice cream (as well as that judge! After all of the sexist legal horror stories I’ve heard from the area I live in, that guy/gal is a breath of fresh air.). I had a phone/email combo creeper ex once, but I didn’t do anything about it because as a dumb teenager I didn’t know legal action *could* be taken for threatening behavior. The phone calls were the worst; my “favorite” was a 4AM “I was yelling at you in the shower”. Like, why call me for that? Or yell at me when I’m not around an inform me later, for that matter?
I changed phone numbers and email addresses and moved, so that took care of that, but ugh. Really, good on oraclenine for getting the police involved, I don’t know you, but I’m proud of you. 🙂
No orchids for me: I’ve got a definite brown thumb except, occasionally, with food plants – I’m okay with radishes and squash.
oraclenine, you do deserve both the pony and ice cream for making it through that. Glad the police and judge had your back!
Monster, I’ll post pics of my orchids later — maybe you can help me identify the colorful one. 🙂
Re Kitteh’s referee whistle – I remember being a friend (she’s fantstically funny – a riot to be around) was throwing a party in her flat. At some point during the evening, the phone rang, friend answers it, listens for a few seconds, then holds up the reciever and yells across the party noise “Hey it’s a dirty phone call – who wants to listen!”, pauses, then says “oh, no, he’s hung up”.
Possibly not the reaction the caller was looking for… 😉
I also thought Emilygoddess was a long time regular, albeit one who posts infrequently. For what it’s worth, I enjoy your contributions to the board.
I think most posts don’t get a direct response unless it’s part of an ongoing conversation or a response to a specific poster. I often enjoy comments without responding to them because I’ve got nothing to add and most of my comments don’t garner a direct response. I doesn’t mean I’m ignoring people or being ignored, as far as I can tell.
Perhaps, I should throw out some appreciative LOLs because many of the posters here are quite funny. For instance, a shout out to Buttercup Q. Skullpants, who is extra very funny and should post more frequently so that I may be more amused in life. Step it up, Skullpants.
Wow, since this thread still seems to be active, I’ll go ahead and post this!
Not me; I appreciate knowing things like that because it makes it so much easier to comment confidently. Even so, I’m still way more of a lurker and tend to make one-off comments which tend to get lost in long comment threads. If someone does respond to me and I’m around to notice it, I feel a mix of happiness and bashfulness for some reason. If I’ve lurked long enough, I’ll feel like one of the gang even if I never comment.
Again, no. I think the doubling down is the difference between simply wanting to join a conversation and wanting to be noticed/affirmed or even become the center of attention. Maybe it’s as simple as the difference between polite and rude?
I agree with this. Even with my very infrequent commenting habit, I’ve run afoul of things like this. My first reaction is “Oops, sorry to have offended! Won’t do it again.” which never gets anyone flamed that I’ve ever noticed. It’s not hard to do and if someone really disagrees, they can certainly find a blog they’ll fit in with and like better.
Oh, and what’s the difference between unicorns and horses (as in what perpetuates their appearance)? I hope they both like apples, because I have a bag of them here. The teal deer is welcome to a few as well.