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So over on A Voice for Men, young Jason Gregory seems faintly jealous that young women who put up dating profiles online tend to get flooded with messages — and the occasional dick pic — from horny guys.
F]ree cock is everywhere. Men give it away like it’s worthless. … I doubt that it is unusual at all for a woman to get 300 messages in her inbox from men who are desperate for female affection, approval, and sex. There is no doubt in my mind that men send “dick-pics” and clamor, bother, and sometimes harass women for their affections and attentions.
But Jason feels no sympathy for young women who put up profiles hoping to meet some nice young fellow who’s also into Sherlock and Neil Gaiman and Indian food and instead get messages from guys who introduce themselves by expressing a desire to ejaculate in their hair.
No, Jason is angry because he’s convinced all these offers of “free cock” only serve to make the women of the world into snooty-stuck stuck-up so-and-sos who think they’re all that and a folder full of dick pics.
All you men who give it away, all you do is reinforce the entitlement mentality of women who believe that their being present is plenty. You reinforce the idea that women don’t owe anything to the relationship—that they deserve a free-ride of cocks and that they don’t even have to break a sweat.
Jason, I should add, means this last bit literally. He’s resentful that when he allegedly engages in the act of coitus he has to do all the work while his alleged partners allegedly lie there like inflatable love-dolls.
Anyhoo,.Jason has a plan to take these stuck-up ladies down a peg or two: A cock strike.
Yep, he wants men to start saying “no” to women who are interested in them, just to see how they like it. But he doesn’t want them to just say no. He wants them to be giant dicks about it.
Try telling a girl no. Tell her, after she makes it clear that she wants your cock, that you’re not interested in giving it to her. Tell her that she isn’t interesting, that her soul is dog-shit and that she has nothing to offer other than boobs and booty, that she is a piece of shit and a total failure as a human being, that you don’t find her attractive and that she isn’t even good enough to be a cum-bucket. Tell her that she is never going to be any good at sucking cock and that she needs to stop pretending that she is doing any favors and learn to compensate for her inadequacies by becoming “kinky.” Tell her that her vapid life of shoes and pop-culture and materialism are soulless pursuits of dog-shit. Watch what happens. If you Jez-ladies wanna know what “hostile” means, see this rejected woman.
Emphasis mine.
A Voice for Men, you may recall, sees itself as leading the most important civil rights movement of the 21st century. I am sure Jason Gregory’s post here will be remembered alongside Martin Luther King’s Letter from a Birmingham Jail as a classic in civil rights literature.
EDIT: I added a couple more “allegedlys” to a sentence I thought needed them.
LOL some dude just sent me a message:
“But there’s nothing mentioned here! Where do we even start?!”
Dude, fucking chill – I made this profile like 10 minutes ago. XD
That’s another part of the experiment. Be logged in on, say, a weekend night, and watch the chat messages. Count what percentage of them are basically “so, wanna fuck?”.
I found a picture and uploaded it. 9 visits in less than 10 minutes. Oh my.
Had an OKC account for a while. I spoke to some nice people but it quickly got a bit overwhelming and disturbing for me. I had to turn the chat off because even with filters set up on it there was too much shit getting through. Loads of ‘wanna fuck’ type messages, plus lots of messages from guys who had sent me messages I hadn’t replied to badgering me about why I hadn’t replied or why I had looked at their profile and not sent a message… sometimes less than an hour before. Got guys telling me they wanted to stalk me – they could ‘work out where I hang out and suprise me’, ‘find out where you work and check you out in person’, etc.
And yes, a lot of men get really fucking mad when you make the mistake of letting them know you aren’t interested. Although lots get mad if you don’t and send you abuse anyway.
And this started before I had even put a pic on the profile, I got a few messages complaining that there was no picture on my empty profile while I was filling it in, and another one saying he liked mysterious women. Didn’t even have casual sex box checked to prompt all this (and yes I did get dozens of messages asking me about it anyway, or asking why I didn’t have it ticked).
Good luck Ally 😛
My favorite were the “but other women are interested in casual sex” guys.
Dude: But other women are interested in casual sex.
Me: I’m not. Which is why I didn’t pick that option
Dude: But other women are, so why not?
Me: Because I’m not interested in casual sex.
Dude: But other women are.
Me: Cool, so you should go talk to them, then.
Dude: But other women are interested, so why do you say you’re not?
And on and fucking on until you block them.
Blocking menz on dating websites = misandry!
Ugh, yes exactly.
I also ahem, enjoyed, variations on this one:
Dude way outside my age range: Hey I know I’m a bit older than you are looking for but maybe we can chat.
Me: Sorry but I am looking for people closer to my own age.
Dude: Come on, age is just a number right?
Me: I hope you find what you are looking for, but I’m not going to chat.
Dude: You should just give me a chance babe.
Dude: Women really appreciate maturity.
Dude: Your profile made you look like you weren’t just another shallow girl.
*block*
I got both too old and too young! Had almost an exact replica of the conversation about casual sex with a 21 year old guy who was convinced that every older woman he found attractive must be dying to be his sexy cougar. Repeated questions as to why, if there were so many older women looking to hook up with young guys, he didn’t go talk to them instead of pestering me, got nothing but “but there are other older women who’re looking for young guys”.
What do they think will happen!? Does repeating a question over and over and over work on anyone on those sites? Are there really people who will meet up with them just to shut them up instead of just blocking them? XD
I’m not/wasn’t really old enough to get many guys who were too young, but I did get one 19 year old guy send me a couple of messages gushing about how I was his ‘perfect cougar’ and could i ‘teach him’ things, I laughed so much as I was 24 at the time.
A 24 year old cougar. LOL.
I have no idea why they think that repetition will change the answer they’re getting rather than just annoy the shit out of the person they’re talking to. Oh, wait, I do! It’s called misogyny, and it’s why I started blocking people like that as soon as the pattern of them not listening to me became apparent.
I think it’s safe to say that almost all women have experienced sexual harassment at some point in their lives. It’s especially worse when you are a teen and it hits you like a hammer all of a sudden. Those men who have never experienced it they cannot even imagine it, they think it’s cool someone to be sexually interested in you in any form, they have no idea how threatening and horrifying this experience is.
Teen? The first incidents of really openly sexualized harassment that I recall happened when I was 9, and I’m betting I’m not the only one.
Then how do you explain language like this:
“Saddling up” suggests they’re on top. I don’t know how one can lie there like an inflatable love-doll in an “aggressive, cock-breaking” way. Apparently aggressive cock-breaking intercourse is not nearly vigorous enough. Does he want to be worn down to a bloody nub? Does he want his partner to sweat like a man (hint: men sweat more, dude, it’s your hormones)? The only sex he speaks approvingly of involves women hopped up on powerful stimulants with their mascara running (presumably from sweat, but considering the source I wouldn’t rule out tears) and semen on their faces (is it oral? Do you want your partner to go down on you? Use your words).
It took me way too many of those exchanges to realise that there is no point engaging with them, even to tell them no. If they have messaged to tell me one thing I ask for is wrong, why did I think they’d accept a ‘no’? Stupid me.
Oh! Another favorite memory.
Family friend’s boyfriend: You’re so pretty, blah blah, maybe if X and I break up we could (insert inappropriate suggestions here)…
Me: I’m 12
Family friend’s boyfriend: That’s OK, I don’t mind.
He was in his mid twenties.
One reason I don’t fancy sex with mascara on is that when that stuff gets in my eyes, everything else stops while I get it out! 😛 OW fuck OW OW shit OW + scrabbling for mirror and eyedrops = bonerkiller no stimulant could override.
Cassandra — ewwwwww!
“Use your words”
Seriously, this!
(I’m not even going to the semen-on-face bit because that is not happening.)
@ Argenti
Yep. There’s a reason I’m so protective of kids, and have such non-negotiable boundaries.
I hope that family friend’s boyfriend soon disappeared from the scene. Ewwwwwww indeed.
I think that’s part of the issue that needs discussed, however. How many times to men tell women that we just “need to be honest” with them when we aren’t interested? It’s to the point where it’s considered “playing games” if women don’t respond to every single interested suitor. We get screamed at on the street if we try ignoring a man who approaches us, or followed, or worse (I’ve personally been followed home, screamed at, called a bitch, just for being silent and trying to continue walking away).
Not responding has become a defense mechanism for women, however many men don’t understand that, and still try to claim that it’s “playing games” or being a “bitch” if we’re not completely honest and upfront about not being interested.
Let’s call that reason #44 why I suspect his descriptions stem from pornography rather than actual experience.
@Chie – and to add to confusion, on the face of it it seems like not responding at all to a first message at least is a really fucking clear signal that someone is not interested. It is a complete abscence of anything indicating interest. But it isn’t enough, you have to respond. But responding to reject makes you a bitch. Being blunt with it makes you one kind of bitch, being a bit gentler is gameplaying and leading on, another kind of bitch.
Maybe the manosphere should just be open and honest with us about what they want. Obvs all men want the same thing, so of course it should be really simple to just consult their hive mind and get their story straight.
Basically what these guys are saying, in however roundabout a way, is that “no” is not an acceptable answer. Doesn’t matter whether it’s an explicit or implicit no, either way they know what it means and they don’t want to accept it.
Yeah exactly cassandrakitty, any answer that isn’t yes will be vilified, leading on if you don’t give the harshest no and cruel if you do. And you’re definitely not the only one, harassment started when I was a little girl and answered the house phone to some pedo and his detailed fantasies, amped up once I was 11, and continued on. I wonder if deep down catcallers and sexual harrassers know they’re tapping into childhood fear. Probably.