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Men’s Rightser: Men win the “we care a lot” olympics because of the Titanic, 9/11

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This graphic is the top (unstickied) post on the Men’s Rights subreddit at the moment. Like that Warren Farrell quote I wrote about last week, it’s yet another example of a familiar claim made by misogynistic Men’s Righsers — that men are world’s true heroes, sacrificing themselves for the good of women too lazy or cowardly or whatever to stand up for themselves.

At first glance, the graphic seems to have a certain logic to it: Far more men than women did die on the titanic; that’s a fact. All of the firefighters who died on 9/11 were men; that is also, as far as I can tell, a fact.

Does this justify the graphic maker’s conclusion that “men simply are caring people.” Well, no. You can’t actually draw conclusions about all 3.5 billion men and boys on planet earth from two examples.

But there’s a lot more wrong with the graphic-maker’s argument than that, as a closer look at these two examples can show.

Let’s start with the 9/11 firefighters, because it’s a bit more straightforward. First, I want to point out a little bit of hanky panky the graphic maker is playing with the numbers. Yes, it is true that all of the firefighters who died in and around the towers that day were male. But they weren’t the only first responders to die; if you also include police officers, you will find at least one woman’s name in the list.

That said, yes, virtually all of the first responders who died were men, including every single firefighter who died. And they died heroes, there’s no question about that.

But this isn’t because there were hundreds of female firefighters standing back eating bon bons and letting the men do the dirty and dangerous work for them. Firefighting is a heavily male-dominated profession, and like a lot of male-dominated professions it has not exactly been welcoming to women, who have faced discrimination and harassment (sexual and otherwise) when they’ve tried to enter the “boys club.”

But there’s an even bigger elephant in the room: while virtually all of the first-responders who died on 9/11 were men, all of the terrorists who hijacked the planes that day were also men.

So if you’re going to use this incident to claim that “men simply are caring people,” wouldn’t you also have to conclude that “men simply are terrorists?”

Or perhaps you might want to reconsider using an incident like this to draw conclusions about an entire gender.

When MRAs — taking their cue from Warren Farrell — complain about men being forced or pressured into the “protecter role,” most of the time they are protecting women from the actions of other men.

Yep, men are more likely to run into burning buildings to save women than women are to save men. But men are far more likely to murder their intimate partners  (or their exes) than women are.

Even the Titanic, perhaps the MRAs  favorite example of “male disposability,” is in fact yet another case in which some men sacrificed themselves to save women from the actions of other men.

First of all, let me point out another little bit of trickery that the graphic-maker is playing with the numbers here. While it is true that a much higher percentage of women on board the Titanic survived than men, looking at the raw numbers is misleading, because there were also several times as many men as women on the ship in the first place. And that class made an enormous difference in terms of survival as well, though their were certainly many upper-class men who went down with the ship. (Like, for example, my great-grandfather Jacques Futrelle, the mystery writer.)

And it’s also worth pointing out that the “women and children first” policy that seems to have been followed, to a degree, on the Titanic wasn’t actually typical, as I’ve pointed out before; indeed, one study of  15,000 victims of major maritime disasters found that more women and children died than men.

But the plain fact is that chivalry didn’t kill the men on the Titanic. This was a preventable disaster, one that was, quite literally, man-made.

The White Star Line chose to equip their ship with an inadequate number of lifeboats. The captain of the ship chose to plow ahead in conditions of virtually no visibility through a section of the North Atlantic that he knew from reports that day was filled with icebergs.

And of course the captain, and the decision makers at the White Star line were all men.

So if you want men as a group to get credit for kindness because some men willingly gave up their seats on the lifeboats for women, it would seem only fair to have to give all men blame for the recklessness and hubris of the ship captain and those White Star line executives who decided that the ship didn’t really need lifeboats enough for everyone on board.

Human beings, whatever their gender, are fascinating and varied creatures, who respond differently to challenges in different settings. There are countless examples of men — and women — rising to the challenges that history has put before them and finding reserves of heroism that they didn’t even know they had. And there are countless examples of men — and women — acting in craven and awful and evil ways.

No gender has a monopoly on kindness or cruelty.

Also, fuck the captain of the Titanic. What an asshole.

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justabrowngirl
justabrowngirl
10 years ago

takshak, now those are some scary spiders…won’t be scooping them up and taking them outside.

grumpycatisagirl
grumpycatisagirl
10 years ago

Huh. That sounds bad for his future employment prospects, not theirs.

Diana Adams
Diana Adams
10 years ago

It’s part of the conditioning used to keep us smiling, compliant, unambitious and easy targets.

QFT

justabrowngirl
justabrowngirl
10 years ago

Diana, that frighteningly hilarious. To think there still some people that think this way, scary.

genderneutrallanguage
10 years ago

“No Gender has a monopoly on kindness or cruelty”

Ever stop to think that maybe this was the point of the post? There is no shortage of people talking about the horrible things men do. Try and talk about the good things men do, and that’s woman hateing? REally someone has the audacity to say something nice about men as a gender, and you twist it into something ugly.

kittehserf
10 years ago

Diana, d’you want to know an easy way to do blockquotes?

kittehserf
10 years ago

Jayzuz you’re thick, GNL. Two short planks have got nothing on you.

takshak
takshak
10 years ago

oh, the twisting was applied before we got a hold of it, troolie.

kittehserf
10 years ago

(NB thick as in wilfully obtuse in GNL’s case.)

kittehserf
10 years ago

takshak – ::snicker:: those guys have been twisting it far too long, which may be part of their problem.

Sam-I-Was?
Sam-I-Was?
10 years ago

Man boobz community I need your help for something entirely off topic but honestly dealing with someone trying to take a tragedy that affected so many and make it a meme makes me hostile.

My uncle in law is dying. He was a pipe fitter in the Navy and now is dying of lung cancer from asbestos exposure. When he passes spouse and I would like to have people make donations on his behalf instead of flowers but I’m not really sure what to suggest. Obviously we have thought of the VA however Uncle has devoted his life to helping other Veterans with everything from healthcare to emotional/psychological help. Just to toot his horn a little he was acknowledged for all of the work he has done to help Veterans by the state a few months ago. I know that we have at least one Veteran in our numbers so I need suggestions.

After the estate is settled spouse and I will be in a position to donate some money to a charity to help wounded veterans. I’ve seen plenty of commercials but does anyone have any suggestions where donations might do the most good? Uncle spent his life trying to improve the lives of veterans and I would like to continue that after his parting. I know that not all wounds are physical and would like a charity that addresses the overall recovery not just the physical wounds if possible. Having been burned in the past I hate to think that we would make a donation to a charity that won’t really be helping.

We are in the US so any US based charities would probably be most effective but I would love to know if there is an international charity helping the troops as well.

Ally S
10 years ago

“No Gender has a monopoly on kindness or cruelty”

Ever stop to think that maybe this was the point of the post? There is no shortage of people talking about the horrible things men do. Try and talk about the good things men do, and that’s woman hateing? REally someone has the audacity to say something nice about men as a gender, and you twist it into something ugly.

The main problem with the image is that it overemphasizes the “benevolence” of patriarchal gender roles for the sake of an anti-feminist agenda. No one here has a problem admitting that there are men who have done good things.

justabrowngirl
justabrowngirl
10 years ago

Sam-I-Was? I’m sorry about your uncle…unfortunately I don’t have the information you seek but I will keep my eyes open.

Caroline Not-So-Sweet
Caroline Not-So-Sweet
10 years ago

Sam-I-Was?, so sorry about your Uncle-in-law. I hope his passing is peaceful and your happy memories of him will be bring you comfort during this difficult time.
You might want to consider donating to the Fisher House Foundation. It provides lodging and support to the families of wounded and sick veterans.

Caroline Not-So-Sweet
Caroline Not-So-Sweet
10 years ago

Diana Adams, that video was hilarious. I’m sure if I posted that on ROK or SSM’s website many of the readers wouldn’t realize it’s satire.

Bina
Bina
10 years ago

Ever stop to think that maybe this was the point of the post? There is no shortage of people talking about the horrible things men do. Try and talk about the good things men do, and that’s woman hateing? REally someone has the audacity to say something nice about men as a gender, and you twist it into something ugly.

Go back and read the graphic again, Gender-not-so-neutral-bozo. You’ll find that it quite specifically glorifies men, and only men. AND pisses all over feminism.

kittehserf
10 years ago

Funny how, for instance, the nurses (mostly if not entirely women) who served in wartime and died at the hands of, you guessed it, MEN, never get a mention from MRAs. Who’da thunk they’d overlook that?

shayla
shayla
10 years ago

If you think the graphic has no agenda, consider why it’s so interested in informing you there weren’t female firefighters who died, and not “enough” women died in Titantic — why not just say, “x amount of men died protecting others” (hard to prove with Titantic victims but you get my drift). And why not speak of situations where men died saving other men and children (actually hmm this was the case with 9/11 firefighters so why oh why is it being cast as “men saving women” again?).

kittehserf
10 years ago

And once again: the 9/11 attacks were committed by men, in a male-driven agenda with a lot of misogyny mixed up in its hatreds. But yeah, it’s all men and only men who are kind, caring heroes, according to MRAs. All men get the credit for the NYC firefighters and rescue personnel (they’d probably claim credit for the work the search dogs did if they could); but one mustn’t suggest they share the blame for the mass murders committed by other men.

Diana Adams
Diana Adams
10 years ago

kittehserf, yes please.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

Eh, I’m tired of having the same conversation over and over again with this tedious asshole. Can we just ignore him?

justabrowngirl
justabrowngirl
10 years ago

Cassandrakitty, Mmm. Let me see…No, no where in this site it says that we are required to talk to them. But you must admit some are entertaining, lol.

Diana Adams
Diana Adams
10 years ago

Talking about 9/11 attacks and terrorists I guess not many people know that it was a team of of mostly women analysts who hunted down the Al Qaeda.

http://washingtontimes.com/news/2013/may/1/cia-women-who-hunted-bin-laden-in-the-spotlight/?page=all

Glad to know it was women who found those not only terrorists but misogynists as well.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

This one is not entertaining, and never has been.

justabrowngirl
justabrowngirl
10 years ago

Diana Adams, wasn’t the movie zero dark thirty base on that cia women?