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Become a total Alpha Male sex god by spitting in women’s mouths

Always practics safe saliva sex
Always practice safe saliva sex

Hey ladies! Better not read today’s post, as it’s only for ALPHA DUDES and would-be ALPHA DUDES. For while I was out looking for Man Boobz material I happened to run across some excellent and not-at-all ridiculous advice from a dude called FISTO on how ALPHA DUDES can use sex to totally control the ladies.

This advice is so totally ALPHA I feel I can only dispense it in small doses, so here are a few tips. Only after you have totally mastered these tips to totally master the ladies should you even consider reading the rest of the post I got them from.  (Also, to be serious for a moment, it’s also fucked up and possibly triggery, so you may not even want to read my post.)

First of all, you need to know that

Women fall in love with you when you Make them feel special + Make them feel feminine …

When they love you, you have the power. …

You will become the man she desperately needs and is terrified of losing.

Ok, so how do you do this? Easy as pie!

Women release the hormone OXYTOCIN during sex, the more intimate and powerful the pleasure for her, the more you will own her ass.

And that means ORGASMS, baby!

The most common orgasm a woman has is the Clitoral Orgasm.  Most people know you can stimulate her to climax with your hands or tongue or when fucking you can angle your body so it gets rubbed by your rock hard abs.

Wait, what?

you can angle your body so it gets rubbed by your rock hard abs.

You can angle your body to rub her clit with your abs.

Ok, I am just going to have to take his word for this. Granted, I don’t actually have rock-hard-abs, but I’m pretty sure that unless you are literally this dude

Lower-Ab-Workouts

no part of your abs — not even your lower abs, down there between the six pack and the you-know-what — are going to be rocking her clit.

Anyhoo, if you want to make her feel especially feminine and special, you need to

do what a Lion does when it hears a wounded animal and go in for the kill.

And what that means is spitting. Lots of spitting. Possibly NONCONSENSUAL spitting.

Ladies love spitting!

Making her open her mouth and spitting in it, spitting on her face, baby smacking her face, her tits, really throwing down on her ass leaving big red handprints, making her tell you that’s your pussy, and on and on. That’s what bonds her to you, that’s the Greater Alpha Male Long Game.

Ok, you say, I’m totally down with this ALPHA stuff but do the ladies really like all of this spitting?

Well, that’s exactly what some dude asked in the comments to FISTO’s totally ALPHA post, and FISTO laid down some TRUTH on him:

You gotta amp up the intensity of the encounter, you have to escalate by kissing her and making her swallow big drips of saliva, then when you start fucking her tell her to open her mouth, she may say no. Tell her “DO IT”. She will whimper and then do it, and let it drip right in there. Then when you get going hard and the smacking ensues let her rip. It’s not for everyone, but you’ll likely be THE ONLY ONE that does it to her. And that’s leaving a mark.

Pressuring women into doing humiliating things after they say no … what could be more ALPHA than that?

… and I don’t really have any more jokes for today.

I can only hope that all of Fisto’s alleged sexual experience is made up, not just some of it.

I found Fisto and his Red Pill advice through the excellent Blue Pill subreddit. It was also posted in r/sex, where it was, thankfully, downvoted and ridiculed.

NOTE: Added a trigger warning of sorts.

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kittehserf
10 years ago

Speaking of other great kids shows, I’ve always been a huge fan of Arthur. Who else here remembers that show?

We’re not talking Arthur and the Square Knights of the Round Table, are we? I loved that show.

And the Banana Splits.

vaiyt
10 years ago

NOW I read the comments and sorry, I just couldn’t stop laughing after Fisto started trying to lecture women on their own orgasms!

driveby
driveby
10 years ago

Delurking just to say I literally, actually retched when reading that quote about the spitting. If someone did that to me in real life I don’t think I could be held responsible for my reaction.

And to the splainer in the comments: I’m female and have had ALL the kinds of orgasms. In fact I’m certain there’s a connection between being physically sensitive enough to orgasm very easily and being sensitive enough to literally retch at this creepy shit’s bad sex writing.

Argenti Aertheri
10 years ago

Hey, AIT got a kitty! And people are calling Cassandra cassandrakitty cuz she changed her nym…which I only just noticed >.<

So that Maude video? The French part? That's how fucking fast my language app goes. Which means I need to torment pecunium and get him to fix my surely horrible pronunciation.

On topic…no, just no. You stop when your partner says no, or stop, or other words indicating that you should stop. You do not give out advice saying you should do otherwise without a clear explanation that when she says no, she means yes, because the safe word is, idk, mangoes. (I need a mango hater to harass, because tu es l'homme in Latin…well, no l'homme, but tu es is also Latin for you are, but it's said like you'd say apartment 2S, whereas french seems like like idfk, I know I have tu wrong, and es is more like e? Of course, that il est l'homme seems to have the est the same sound as es…*head explodes*)

Fisto? Il est la pomme (he's an apple, the best I can do at present)

AIT
AIT
10 years ago

Argenti:

Yup! Got myself a kitteh. I’ll bet once you get the sounds associated in your head, it won’t be too difficult to read French. The nice thing is, it’s still a mostly phonetic script. The only thing close to that is Pinyin for Chinese, but that is only really used for learning, or for transliteration into Roman script languages, as there are so many homonyms. There’s actually a bunch of tongue twisters on that, actually. For instance, the Lion-Eating Poet in the Stone Den. Even my Chinese professors think this one is mostly nonsense to illustrate how tones are everything.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vExjnn_3ep4&w=560&h=315]

kittehserf
10 years ago

Curious, isn’t it: he claims he’s talking about games and of course it’s consensual and blah blah … but if this is advice for guys who aren’t trying to be rapists and abusers generally, why did he fixate on something guaranteed to disgust a lot of people? The idea would be stomach-churning for plenty of people even if it was described as an actual consensual act and not part of him abusing her. But to combine them, then pretend to be all wounded that anyone would call him on it? Bullshit. He’s describing a woman being terrified and disgusted; not terrified of losing Mr Macho Abs but of what’s being forced upon her.

Porn-fixated little piece of shit he is.

marinaliteyears
10 years ago

mmm. I give Fisto points for coming here and *trying* to actually talk, And even admitting his weakness as a writer, But Thats about all I give him.

What he loses points for Is.. well Legion. In no particular order, an organized list of my problems with what he said, as I recall them (im sure there are many I missed.)
1.He assumes all woman orgasm In some weird tiered manner, and that they all do so the same. (Clitoral being the weakest..? Give me a break. In my own experiences, the opposite is true.)
2.He pulls the old bs argument of ‘but this other thing is worse therefore ignore the bad here!’ (In this case, he argues that non consenting spitting isnt rape, since rape is ‘only’ penetrative apparently, at least by his personal definition. as was pointed out, Sexual assault is sexual assault.. the ‘severity’ of the assault not somehow removing the status of the assault.
3.He fails to understand basic consent, and assumes that all woman are the same. (Typical failings, I suppose, but my being jaded to those two don’t make them less disgusting.)
4.He backpedaled to the INTH degree and assumed that everyone here was some kind of hateful Feminazi.(To be fair to him, things do get mocking here. however, he wholly deserved it, and many people here did step up and converse with him fairly, and he *STILL* wrote it all off as hate, and repeated the other problems without any regret.)
5.The typical unrepentent attitude, and the typical ‘but Ive done it 100s of times! so I know what im talking about!’ (Im willing to give Fisto the benefit of a doubt here, and assume he has either not had sex, or has had sex but never ‘had the balls’ to have the rapey sex he describes, since this whole scenario seems to be firmly planted in fantasy.. however, I do concede that the disturbing possibility he HAS performed his fantasy and gotten away with it on a non-consenting party leaves me queasy.)

All in all, The best case scenario here is that Fisto has left with maybe a shred of doubt on his thoughts, and that In spite of his knee-jerk self-defending, he comes to eventually research what REAL consent and Kink negotiation is like. I kind of doubt it though, but I guess i’m a hopeful kind of person.

Bleh.

titianblue
titianblue
10 years ago

Well, I’m gutted to have missed Fisto mansplaining women’s orgasms but, in case he’s still lurking:

And again, what girl is going to let you spit in her mouth if she doesn’t want you to? That has never happened to me.

How would you even know? Did you ask? Given that you didn’t ask before you spat (and describe ignoring an explicit “no”), I doubt it.

I guess I’m just to far removed from what you guys are describing as rape.

Your arrogance is breathtaking. You describe physically dominating your sexual partners and sexually assaulting them. you ignore explict “no”s during intercourse. But, hey, it’s you doing it so it can’t be rape, right?

You know the only thing I believe about you? That you more of animals than most people. Because you certainly blatently despise every woman and girl on this planet. Oh, sorry, you did realise that women and girls are people, didn’t you?

leatapp
leatapp
10 years ago

I’m also a fan of Arthur and ever since my oldest was little I’ve had trouble not singing this every time I check the mailbox:

hellkell
hellkell
10 years ago

Dammit, my Nurse Jackie binge watching caused me to miss the party. I’m so sorry I missed Fisto and his complete lack of anatomy and consent.

titianblue
titianblue
10 years ago

Someone I think more of than of Fisto:

http://instagram.com/p/jRY2_fl-42/

(the undergardener suggesting that the indoor plants need her attention)

pillowinhell
10 years ago

Chickens!!!!!!!!!??

Sorry couldn’t restrain myself.

Quackers
Quackers
10 years ago

OT but somewhat relevant…everyone including cops just believe a woman’s word and throws the man in jail huh?
http://www.buzzfeed.com/jtes/city-will-pay-rape-victim-150000-after-police-accused-her-of

emilygoddess
emilygoddess
10 years ago

SO I just realized that when Fisto talked about “gushing” sex, he didn’t mean “gushing” emotionally. So to anyone who though I was oversharing about having had said experience, I apologize for the overshare, but I didn’t mean it like that…

@leatapp, you too? Also, all of my notebooks are “handy-dandy”.

cloudiah
10 years ago

@Quackers, To counter MRAs false rape hysteria, I keep a little list of what I call “false false rape accusations” — such as that Washington case, or the fairly recent revelation that police officers in England were pressuring women to withdraw rape charges so that they could pretend the crime rate was lower than it actually was.

Falconer
Falconer
10 years ago

I’ll concede to a little jealousy to you ladies that you ladies get all the best toys. I bought a high-end male toy and it split in half after 3 or 4 uses. I was irritated because it cost a decent chunk of money that I could have used on something else fun.

I’ve been seeing ads for what is essentially a water balloon with a ladygarden. I hope the rubber’s sturdy ….

Not to mention all the full-sized dolls of silicone or velour or what-have-you that some men spend lots of money on.

OH GOODY he showed up!

Kittehserf, What is your problem? You’ve never been with a girl that tells you to pin her legs back??

*snrk*

What can I say, I love women!

Demonstrably, you don’t.

And you don’t even have to chew them up first and spit them in my mouth in a drizzle while I whimper and say NOOO>>>

Okay, I no longer want blueberry-lemon muffins….

Fisto
10 years ago

Yes David, I was referencing the Big Lewbowski, fun fact. I’m friends with John Goodman.

Ladies, what is all this “safe word” mumbo jumbo?? “No” is a safe word when it is actually meant. I’m not sure why everyone is acting as if women don’t say things they don’t mean.

There’s no need for a legal contract to be signed before sex. A good lover can intuitively tell what a woman will respond to.

If something happens that someone doesn’t like, a simple adjustment is made and then both parties move on and continue!

It’s comical that some of you women act as though the cops should be called as soon as you don’t like something. And let me remind you, you aren’t there!

I’ve said it over and over, you’re all projecting this horrible scenario when in fact, it’s sexy as hell.

I’m starting to think everyone here is a bunch of Ellen Jamesions!

Dave, I like you, even though I think you’re misguided. I think you actually believe that men are walking around on a tightrope about to rape women. Which is noble but I don’t think you realize that isn’t the case. I can’t imagine how hard it is to rape a woman! How would someone even maintain an erection! Not to mention all a girl has to do is slightly move her hips and your dick won’t even go in! And that’s with a girl trying to have sex!

I know that you intentionally changed the message of my article, I hope it wasn’t to perpetuate the misconception that all men are potential rapists. Partially, I write for men wanting to improve their interactions with women, but also, I want men to improve their lives because I believe a rising tide raises all ships!

Leatapp, I’m happy to here you volunteer in a shelter. But it’s very selfish of you to take your personal feelings towards me and obsfucate the positive message I left about adopting a pet and saving a life.

You seem to hate men in general, looking for something to disapprove of.

You guys have rape tourettes. Everything is rape rape rape. It’s astounding. I don’t describe rape in my sexual encounters. I describe, intense consensual sexual satisfaction.

I feel sorry that some of you haven’t experienced it.

It’s the attitudes I’m afraid, no man will be able to make you cum in the ways I’ve described if you’re constantly seeing the world through the prism of a potential victim and looking for things to be upset about.

I’ve never come across a group of people that are so negative! It’s unhealthy to be this way!

Kittesherf, I’m specifically addressing you. I have corrected you over and over. You insist I watch porn (I don’t, if that’s someone else’s thing great, it isn’t for me).

You insist the girls are terrified of me (they aren’t, or the many many text messages talking about wanting to fuck me again after are lies)

You are the type of person that is hopeless I’m afraid. Reason is out the window, common ground, well there isn’t anymore. You have built a fortress of hatred around yourself. That suggests to me that you are hurting yourself quite a bit.

Cassandrakitty – I actually like you. I think you seem smart and maybe not to far gone down the road of man hating to where you could be a happy little thing.

Ladies, there are men out there that would run into a burning building to save you, then run back in to save your cats.

There are men that work thanklessly and tirelessly for you in ways you’d never know.

There are good men, with big hearts out there that just want to have a woman that loves them back.

Lonely, good men, that are terrified of approaching you and just saying hello.

I’m sure the world would be a better place if those men grew some balls and at least gave you the option of rebuffing their advances since the current state of affairs means you’d never know that guy thinks your eyes are brilliant and your hair smells wonderful.

It used to be called romance but now all you females go to your default and unoriginal designator and say “creepy” when you don’t know what else to say.

It’s all rape rape rape, creepy creepy creepy.

Falconer
Falconer
10 years ago

sparky, I know!…it’s a bit embarrassing that I’m a grown woman and still watches powerpuff girls.

I am a man grown and I still watch the Powerpuff Girls. With the exception of a few clunker episodes, I think it’s an excellent program and I miss it acutely.

I have been known to watch and appreciate MLP:FiM, too. I think it’s hilarious, although it’s not really aimed at me. And that’s fine. The last thing I want to do is take a child’s programming away from them.

We’re not talking Arthur and the Square Knights of the Round Table, are we? I loved that show.

Sorry, no, Arthur the Aardvark. Wow, it’s been running since 1996.

(I need a mango hater to harass, because tu es l’homme in Latin…well, no l’homme, but tu es is also Latin for you are, but it’s said like you’d say apartment 2S, whereas french seems like like idfk, I know I have tu wrong, and es is more like e? Of course, that il est l’homme seems to have the est the same sound as es…*head explodes*)

Yep, French has a lot of silent final letters. Tu is pronounced kind of like too, and es/est are both pronounced like a long A. Here’s a pronunciation guide from Wikipedia. It occurs to me that French hasn’t had as much of a vowel shift as English had. When I came to study Chaucer seriously, my experience with speaking from the back of my mouth with French was a big help.

Mind now, I learned French in Kentucky.

I find French easier than Latin because it doesn’t (usually) muck about with its nouns like Latin does. All I have to learn is conjugations and all the participles, but still avoir and être used to drive me mad, and I have trouble with anything fancier than passe simple, passe compose, or futur.

Falconer
Falconer
10 years ago

I’m friends with John Goodman.

I was once in the same room as Neil Gaiman, and on another occasion, The Chieftains.

I can’t imagine how hard it is to rape a woman! How would someone even maintain an erection! Not to mention all a girl has to do is slightly move her hips and your dick won’t even go in! And that’s with a girl trying to have sex!

Fuck you sideways.

BANHAMMER BANHAMMER BANHAMMER

Ally S
10 years ago

[Content note: rape, violence]

Ladies, what is all this “safe word” mumbo jumbo?? “No” is a safe word when it is actually meant. I’m not sure why everyone is acting as if women don’t say things they don’t mean.

You’re forgetting that some people interpret no as a yes regardless of whether the person saying no means it or not. Of course the most important thing is to be respectful of everyone’s consent, but safe words make that much easier. And it’s not like they have to be complicated; you can use a safe word as simple as “stop.”

I can’t imagine how hard it is to rape a woman! How would someone even maintain an erection! Not to mention all a girl has to do is slightly move her hips and your dick won’t even go in! And that’s with a girl trying to have sex!

I would say the main reason many men aren’t rapists is that they aren’t willing to hurt and violate someone else’s body for their own gratification. Not an inability to maintain an erection – such a view doesn’t seem to portray men in a very positive light. Anyway, there are many ways rapists rape their victims, not all of which involve vaginal penetration. And there are many reasons a rapist could be able to maintain an erection, although thinking about those reasons makes my stomach churn, so I won’t talk about them.

As for what the victim can do, what you describe isn’t even close to being a way to prevent rape. The man can also threaten to harm her or someone else (or even threaten her with harming himself). And beyond that, he can physically harm her until she submits, thereby precluding any of her attempts to stop the forced penetration.

Either you’re a rape apologist or you really just have no understanding of the variety of experiences that rape victims go through. As many here have already pointed out, you have a lot of holes in your understanding.

hellkell
hellkell
10 years ago

Fisto, you’re a shitstain. Do the the world a favor and fuck off.

Maybe while you’re fucking off, you could read an anatomy text or something. Your ignorance is staggering.

emilygoddess
emilygoddess
10 years ago

I think I could fill a whole BINGO card from Fisto’s last comment. Fisto, you’re a condescending, mansplaining misogynist and I hope you see that one day.

And while we’re trotting out disgusting AVfM memes, I thought “you’re obviously not getting laid” was a terrible, hurtful shaming tactic? Or is that only when it’s women doing it to men?

Leatapp, I’m happy to here you volunteer in a shelter. But it’s very selfish of you to take your personal feelings towards me and obsfucate the positive message I left about adopting a pet and saving a life.

You seem to hate men in general, looking for something to disapprove of.

1) that was me, and 2) you missed my point, quelle surprise (hint: it was that trying to emotionally manipulate people by shaming them for something they couldn’t possibly have known is disingenuous and stupid. Like you.)

hellkell
hellkell
10 years ago

Well, his ignorance is coming in second to his arrogance.

titianblue
titianblue
10 years ago

I’m liking Fisto for Troll of the Year. Doubling down on the rape apologia and condescension. Pushing all the buttons to try and upset us. Mikey has his work cut out if he’s going to mount a credible challenge.

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