Has the Men’s Rights subreddit found its Walter Mitty? Yesterday, a fellow by the name of Mrwhibbley won himself nearly 200 upvotes from the assembled Men’s Rightsers with a tale of terrible misandry at his local Panera Bread.
I am sitting at panera bread. I got here at 6am, when no one was here. After ordering, I took the only comfy chairs next to a nice fire place and started reading. Halfway through my meal two women came up and asked me to move because they wanted to sit where I was sitting.
Ok, but before you say that this didn’t happen, consider this: Only a few minutes ago a woman demanded my seat, and when I didn’t get up to give it to her she simply sat right on top of me. And by woman I mean cat.
I told them I would be done in about 10 minutes and they could have it them. The older woman (only about 35) said “a real man would be a gentleman and offer his seat to a lady”
That is exactly how those “older ladies” of 35 talk these days.
I replied politely that I understand her outdated view that feels women are weak and require special treatment, but that I believed that women are strong and independent and should be treated as equals.
That’s right. Mrwhibbley has installed a Reddit-comment-to-speech generator in his mouth, and can conveniently turn it on when he wants to recite a Men’s Rightsy talking point.
Immediately, another table about 10 feet from me filled with women (4 women over 70 years old) started chuckling. I initially assumed they were laughing at them women, but then one of them said “what ever happened to chivalry? In my day, a real man would have jumped up….and pulled out the chair for the lady. That man is an ass!”
Ah, yes, because all women, across all generations, are united in their goal of making men give up their nice comfy chairs by the fireplace at Panera Bread.
It was obvious that she said it loud enough for me to hear. I politely replied “In your day, you just got the right to vote, and were not treated as equals. Aren’t you glad you aren’t still in your day?”
Oh, snap!
Well, Mrwhibbley sure showed those old hens what’s for!
By the way, women in their 70s would have been born in the late 30s or early 40s.
Naturally. the assembled Men’s Rightsers applauded Mrwhibbley’s great heroism in standing up to the gynocracy.
But this isn’t the first time that MrWhibbley has had this sort of heroic confrontation with evil, privilege-demanding females, as one of the few skeptical Men’s Rightsers in the crowd pointed out. Only a month ago, he had a surprisingly similar showdown an an ice cream parlor with some teenage girls:
This is a rant. After a long day at work (6am until 3:30) without a break, I was tired and craving an ice cream. I walked in about a minute before a group of 6 girls about 16-18 years old. I ordered my ice cream and paid, and took it.
No misandric misandering so far.
while they ordered theirs, one of the girls commented loud enough for me to hear that a real man would have let a lady go first.
Oh no she didn’t!
Seriously. This didn’t happen.
I ignored them. Two other girls made other comments about my car and my clothes not being fashionable. Again I ignored them. A couple more goggles and comments under their breath that I didn’t hear. After 15 minutes I finished my ice cream and got up to leave. They said “bye loser!”
Imaginary teenage girls can be so cruel!
I decided the high road wasn’t working and said “You are not ladies, and you are to fat to be eating ice cream. Next time try a salad.” Felt good. They were insecure bullies in a pack and deserved to be spanked.
Naturally, the Men’s Rightsers congratulated him for his deft handling of these little misanderers.
So am I being too hasty in assuming that these little stories are fiction? I mean, strange encounters do happen.
Heck, a couple of months ago I was walking back from the grocery store at 1 or 2 AM (I keep odd hours) and a group of gay guys drove up in a convertible, stopped the car, and asked me what I was carrying in my bags. I awkwardly mumbled something about “a lot of different things.” This was apparently not witty enough for them. One of the guys repeated “a lot of different things” with a note of disappointment in his voice, and they drove off.
A few moments later, I realized I should have said “condoms and cat food — I’m having a party!” The first two parts of that would have even been true.
The difference between my story — which actually happened — and MrWhibbley’s — which almost certainly didn’t — is that mine is just a weird thing that happened, and which proves absolutely nothing.
The guys in the car had obviously just left one of the gay bars in the neighborhood and saw me with grocery bags, and must have thought this was sort of amusing given how late it was. So they decided to say something to me. This turned out to be more awkward than hilarious, as real life often is.
The story doesn’t reinforce any weird gay stereotypes — oh those gay guys, they’re always asking about groceries! — and doesn’t make me look like some sort of master wit with a perfect comeback, because I didn’t have one.
In MrWhibbley’s stories, by contrast, the women seem to have come straight from Men’s Rights Central Casting; they are misogynistic caricatures. And of course he always has the perfect comeback — or at least what passes for perfect on the Men’s Rights subreddit.
Another day, another battle with imaginary evil women. That’s the Men’s Rights movement in a nutshell.
The AgainstMensRights folks have been all over this one.
(Hopefully the blockquote thing works out…I’ve only just delurked so I haven’t tried it before to check if this is the right HTML.)
Counter-suggestion: the idea that feminism naturally blinds its adherents to instances of women being dicks isn’t going to serve you well as a basis for argument in a place where most (if not all) commenters are. you know. feminists. It certainly doesn’t count as an “obvious reason”.
Unless you’re just arguing that it’s because they’re women, in which case it’s even worse.
Allow me to suggest that you might not be equip to spot your own pathetic douchebaggery, for all the obvious reasons. Dude, you are not even amusing, you are a bore.
Will someone take out this trash?
Yep. Manginas. Who’s peddling misogyny? I thought MRAs were upset about the effects of gender roles on men.
Actually, I was raised by a very traditionalist woman who would often chastise my brother for not holding open doors for me and my sisters, among other things. My mother insists that a relationship without chivalry is bound to fail. I’m actually hyper-aware of when I see these “instances of sexism” (which is very rarely).
What I’m also aware of:
– My mother is not a feminist, and actively describes herself as “anti-women’s lib”.
– Chivalry is a dying belief even among women who are my mother’s age. Her friends regularly poke fun at her for it.
– Despite how strictly my mother raised my siblings and I, not one of the four of us believes in it – partly because no one besides our mother made us do it and partly because all of us, male and female, thought it was pointless and annoying.
Women being dicks is another thing altogether, but hey, we’re half the population. Some of us are going to be dicks. That doesn’t have anything to do with gender.
Another thing that gets me about the MRA narrative…it is always us white knighting manginas who get in their way, we with our big hairy mangina muscles are always stopping the real men from seeking justice.
If they are the real men, why is it that the manginas are always kicking their asses?
I think it has something to do with the fluoride in the water. Oops, I mean flouride. Also, there’s a feminist conspiracy, caused by evopsych, and it’s all designed to get you more pussy (because obviously all male feminists really only want pussy. All of them. Every single one, without exception).
Notice how Kevin has divided people into two groups: “people whose experiences are the same as his” and “people whose opinions don’t count.”
If you don’t agree with him or your experiences don’t match up with his perceptions, then he simply doesn’t allow you to have a voice in things.
Kevin, I don’t have any problem recognizing “female dickbaggery” when I come across it, and I do come across it with some regularity. Not quite as often as I come across malee dickbaggery, though that in part is an occupational hazard of doing this blog.
What I don’t ever run across is women acting like the women in MrWhibbley’s stories, women who talk as if MRAs were writing all their lines of dialog (because, in this case, one was).
Nor do I assume that one or two anecdotes really tell us anything about women or men as a whole. An anecdote may be illustrative of a larger trend, but only if there’s other evidence of this larger trend. And I haven’t seen a lot of evidence that there are a lot of women going around largely empty Panara Breads at 6 am demanding that men give up their chairs because that’s what “real men” do for “ladies.”
MRAs are obsessed with “women behaving badly” stories — focusing especially on women criminals — as if the actions of individual women are somehow an indictment of all women. If you go to feminist sites, you won’t find a similar assortment of “men behaving badly” stories — even though, if you look at the crime blotter, there are far more stories of men behaving badly out there than there are stories of women behaving badly.
Kevin 11 was Kevin Rudd’s election slogan
“mangina” always sounds like “Manjimup” in my head, so I picture the MRA’s swearing at slightly bewildered Aussie backpackers.
Wait, I said misogyny instead of misandry. They are often the same source so I have trouble telling them apart.
I once had a long discussion in college about whether people would still get made fun of for their names if they had numbers instead of names. One example given of a terrible number name was 12346, like your parents didn’t know how to count.
“The Talk”?! Yikes. Now that’s terrible, David.
May I ask what were you wearing?
Mind you, I’m not implying that you asked for it, but I find it curious — and unfortunate, of course — that you just found yourself at the wrong place during “The Talk” being broadcast during your “jury duty.”
Don’t get me wrong, my heart goes out to all the poormenz so ruthlessly misandered in these examples and everywhere else. But while I certainly don’t condone such behaviors — misandry is awful and its real perpetrators should be prosecuted to the full extent of the law — I think we need to be careful not to cry “misandry!” every time a dude gets his feelings or his butt hurt in a not-so-comfy chair. With false misandry accusations approaching 99.9% nowadays, even the real victims of this hideous violation are suspected of making up their stories. It is a sad state of affairs.
Again, I’m not trying to blame the victim or diminish the pain of true misandrization, but maybe, just maybe you really wanted to watch “The Talk.” It’s been known to happen, you know: dude sneaks into a waiting room somewhere to take a peek at a women’s talk show, plops lazily in a comfy chair, and when confronted with it, he cries “misandry!” to cover his butt. Not wanting to upset the victim, we tend not to question his account of events, and we refrain from offering helpful suggestions that would prevent his (re)victimization. It is a pity.
I think it is time to bring back some common sense into this discussion and state the uncomfortable but much useful obvious: avoid daytime TV and you will not be misandered. Or, better yet, avoid public places altogether. Especially those with comfy chairs. Just sayin’.
Sounds like a great Pierre comic in the making. =P
Poor, poor Kevin.
What a world you inhabit; populated by terrifying and poorly equipped women.
Imagine how a proposal would look through Kev’s twisted lens:
http://youtu.be/spHEw2n9LwE
@Robert Ramirez
“If they are the real men, why is it that the manginas are always kicking their asses?”
I think you’ve just answered your own question. 🙂
At the core of this (supposedly derogatory) juvenile labeling is jealousy. Simply put, MRAs don’t, um, get any — understandably so to everyone but them — and seeing other men getting along with women and presumably sexually happy sticks in their individual and collective craw. Not understanding why normal men get what they so much desire but what’s perpetually beyond their reach, they seek to demean them in the worst way they know: by feminizing them. Manginas, brrr!
Allow me to suggest that preceding their boring trolly insults with the phrase “allow me to suggest” makes boring and pretentious trolls appear boring and pretentious.
I have a tale of misandry!
I was cleaning the insect parts and old boluses out of the tank she was living in. Well, she cam barreling out of her burrow and used her 1″ fangs to inject venom into my hand!
Misandry, I tells ya!
Did I mention that she was a giant Central American spider? Because that’s important.
I once stood near a man in Reno, just to watch him be terrified that I might want his seat.
“It’s true- there will always be manginas and such. They cause damage.”
No sexist attitudes here. Move along.
I note that Kevin has not yet responded to the various posts wrt word meaning. Kevin, just a heads up, use of the word mangina is proof that you disrespect women and think that they are less than men, because unless you believe that women are of lesser value, and that being a woman is somehow demeaning or degrading in and of itself, then mangina is not insulting.
Or your parents could’ve named you 1234556. Your classmates would yell “uno dos tres quatro cinco cinco seis” at you and think your parents were Offspring fans. That would be humiliating.
Yeah, nobody wants to be named after a song that goes “our subject isn’t cool but he fakes it anyway.”
Exactly.
This comment is cracking me up. It sums up mrwobbly and sevenkevin perfectly.
Is this now misandry?
In the comments on the Reddit post, one man shares the frightening story of how some teenage girls on a train asked him to move to a different seat because it was the only way they could sit together. So he bravely turned up his headphones and ignored them until they left.
MISANDRY!
Another reports the frightening experience of sitting at a table, and then a woman sits at the opposite end of the table, but then it turns out she has a bunch of friends, and suddenly the whole table is full of women sitting right next to him. And then a woman who doesn’t realize he was there first asks him to move.
MISANDRY!
Then there’s the frightening story of the man who had a girl ask him to give up his seat on the bus for her, and he said no, and a nearby woman agreed with him that there was no reason to give up his seat, so the girl moved on.
Oh my god the tales of oppression just go on and on…