The Men’s Rights subreddit finds its Walter Mitty

Has the Men’s Rights subreddit found its Walter Mitty? Yesterday, a fellow by the name of Mrwhibbley won himself nearly 200 upvotes from the assembled Men’s Rightsers with a tale of terrible misandry at his local Panera Bread.

I am sitting at panera bread. I got here at 6am, when no one was here. After ordering, I took the only comfy chairs next to a nice fire place and started reading. Halfway through my meal two women came up and asked me to move because they wanted to sit where I was sitting.

Ok, but before you say that this didn’t happen, consider this: Only a few minutes ago a woman demanded my seat, and when I didn’t get up to give it to her she simply sat right on top of me. And by woman I mean cat.

I told them I would be done in about 10 minutes and they could have it them. The older woman (only about 35) said “a real man would be a gentleman and offer his seat to a lady”

That is exactly how those “older ladies” of 35 talk these days.

I replied politely that I understand her outdated view that feels women are weak and require special treatment, but that I believed that women are strong and independent and should be treated as equals.

That’s right. Mrwhibbley has installed a Reddit-comment-to-speech generator in his mouth, and can conveniently turn it on when he wants to recite a Men’s Rightsy talking point.

Immediately, another table about 10 feet from me filled with women (4 women over 70 years old) started chuckling. I initially assumed they were laughing at them women, but then one of them said “what ever happened to chivalry? In my day, a real man would have jumped up….and pulled out the chair for the lady. That man is an ass!”

Ah, yes, because all women, across all generations, are united in their goal of making men give up their nice comfy chairs by the fireplace at Panera Bread.

It was obvious that she said it loud enough for me to hear. I politely replied “In your day, you just got the right to vote, and were not treated as equals. Aren’t you glad you aren’t still in your day?”

Oh, snap!

Well, Mrwhibbley sure showed those old hens what’s for!

By the way, women in their 70s would have been born in the late 30s or early 40s.

Naturally. the assembled Men’s Rightsers applauded Mrwhibbley’s great heroism in standing up to the gynocracy.

But this isn’t the first time that MrWhibbley has had this sort of heroic confrontation with evil, privilege-demanding females, as one of the few skeptical Men’s Rightsers in the crowd pointed out. Only a month ago, he had a surprisingly similar showdown an an ice cream parlor with some teenage girls:

This is a rant. After a long day at work (6am until 3:30) without a break, I was tired and craving an ice cream. I walked in about a minute before a group of 6 girls about 16-18 years old. I ordered my ice cream and paid, and took it.

No misandric misandering so far.

while they ordered theirs, one of the girls commented loud enough for me to hear that a real man would have let a lady go first.

Oh no she didn’t!

Seriously. This didn’t happen.

I ignored them. Two other girls made other comments about my car and my clothes not being fashionable. Again I ignored them. A couple more goggles and comments under their breath that I didn’t hear. After 15 minutes I finished my ice cream and got up to leave. They said “bye loser!”

Imaginary teenage girls can be so cruel!

I decided the high road wasn’t working and said “You are not ladies, and you are to fat to be eating ice cream. Next time try a salad.” Felt good. They were insecure bullies in a pack and deserved to be spanked.

Naturally, the Men’s Rightsers congratulated him for his deft handling of these little misanderers.

So am I being too hasty in assuming that these little stories are fiction? I mean, strange encounters do happen.

Heck, a couple of months ago I was walking back from the grocery store at 1 or 2 AM (I keep odd hours) and a group of gay guys drove up in a convertible, stopped the car, and asked me what I was carrying in my bags. I awkwardly mumbled something about “a lot of different things.” This was apparently not witty enough for them. One of the guys repeated “a lot of different things” with a note of disappointment in his voice, and they drove off.

A few moments later, I realized I should have said “condoms and cat food — I’m having a party!” The first two parts of that would have even been true.

The difference between my story — which actually happened — and MrWhibbley’s — which almost certainly didn’t — is that mine is just a weird thing that happened, and which proves absolutely nothing.

The guys in the car had obviously just left one of the gay bars in the neighborhood and saw me with grocery bags, and must have thought this was sort of amusing given how late it was. So they decided to say something to me. This turned out to be more awkward than hilarious, as real life often is.

The story doesn’t reinforce any weird gay stereotypes — oh those gay guys, they’re always asking about groceries! — and doesn’t make me look like some sort of master wit with a perfect comeback, because I didn’t have one.

In MrWhibbley’s stories, by contrast, the women seem to have come straight from Men’s Rights Central Casting; they are misogynistic caricatures. And of course he always has the perfect comeback — or at least what passes for perfect on the Men’s Rights subreddit.

Another day, another battle with imaginary evil women. That’s the Men’s Rights movement in a nutshell.

The AgainstMensRights folks have been all over this one.