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Pierce Harlan, "false rape" activist, gives up blogging in disgust with fellow MRAs. Then he doesn't.

Some other impressive flip-flops
Some other impressive flip-flops

We’ve seen a lot of epic flip-floppery from Men’s Rightsers in the last few days on the subject of the Occidental College fiasco — that is, for those who haven’t been following it closely, the organized spamming of Occidental’s anonymous online rape reporting form with false reports by Reddit MRAs and 4channers. Notably, the Men’s Rights subreddit mod known as sillymod went from blaming the false reports on trolls one day to hailing them as necessary activism the next.

But a reader has alerted me to an even more epic flip-flop, this one from Pierce Harlan, a blogger obsessed with what he sees as an epidemic of false rape accusations.

Harlan started out as one of the voices of reason — at least by MRA standards — on the Occidental College spamming.  Refraining from the hysteria of his fellow Men’s Rightsers about Occidental College’s anonymous form, he actually pointed out in one post that the form wasn’t being used to punish anyone and that anonymous reporting may be “a necessary evil” in order to get a true picture of the extent of rape.

On Friday, he went further, announcing in a post on his blog The Community of the Wrongly Accused that he was so disgusted with the behavior of his fellow Men’s Rightsers in the Occidental fiasco that he was planning to give up blogging entirely. The phony reports from MRAs, he sadly noted, “did no favors for the wrongly accused,” and this sort of “activism” only served to make MRAs look bad.

[T]he actions of the spammers were misguided at best, puerile and malicious at worst. They’ve given those of us who are trying to raise awareness about these issues in a serious way a black eye. I couldn’t care less how some radical feminist characterizes this incident, my concern is how it plays to middle America — and this can’t be spun in a positive way.

The incident, he wrote, was

the proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back. We’ve long sought to engage our readers, both here and via Reddit, to take certain actions that we felt could actually make a difference for the wrongly accused. These efforts invariably were met with either a lukewarm response or the sound of crickets chirping. …

Yet, now, someone suggests men’s righters spam a school’s rape reporting site, and for that they come out in droves. Hundreds of false rape reports. …

If we could have had this kind of support for the various initiatives we’ve tried to launch, I think we actually could have made a difference for the wrongly accused. We didn’t.

And so, he concluded in frustration,

the time has come to hand this blog over to others who will continue to raise awareness about the injustices to the wrongly accused. I will continue to follow the issue and offer my two cents on issues I think are important, but I’m not going to run this blog any longer.

Yep. That’s right. MRAs are such shitty “activists” that their most notable and attention-getting work of “activism” since I’ve started this blog drove the MRA most dedicated to that issue to such disgust and despair that he announced he was basically giving up the fight.

But Harlan’s retirement didn’t last long.

Apparently deciding that his camel’s back could handle a bit more straw after all, Harlan quickly took down the post announcing his retirement — though it’s still up, at least for now, in Google cache, and when that goes away, here’s a handy screenshot. (In case you’re not an ant, click to see it full size.)

Community of the Wrongly Accused- The Last Straw 2013-12-21 15-38-19

On Saturday, Harlan came out with a new post suggesting that maybe he’d been wrong to challenge the hysteria of the false-report-submitting MRAs in the first place. Remember that bit from above in which Harlan said that the actions of the false-report spammers “can’t be spun in a positive way[?]” Well, Harlan decided he was going to give it the old college try:

Progressives are having a bona fide conniption over the Reddit Men’s Righters who spammed Occidental College’s anonymous rape reporting system with fake “rape” claims (from what we can tell, they were not really false rape claims, just snarky comments about the injustice of anonymous reporting). The righteous indignation from feminists is deafening. The spam attack, they tell us, is typical men’s rights hysteria, the result of an undeservedly privileged class being stripped of its power.

The men’s righters were out to prove that it’s too easy to abuse the college’s anonymous reporting system. We disagreed with the men’s righters and said we weren’t much concerned about the anonymous reporting system, but the more we read the progressive take on the incident, the more we wonder if we blew the call — maybe we should be concerned..

There was, of course, no reference to his post from the previous day, no acknowledgment that the “activism” he was now defending was the very same “activism” that had led him only one day earlier to decide to quit blogging altogether.

Down the memory hole it went. (But Google cache remembers.)

I guess when you’re a Men’s Rights activist, you have to take what you can get, and incredibly shitty slacktivism is about as good as it gets.

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Viscaria
Viscaria
7 years ago

I flinch every time someone corrects ableist language by saying many people on the board are dealing with mental illness, so you need to be more “sensitive” in order to avoid hurting their feeling. This board isn’t populated by fragile flowers or the language police, just people with a low tolerance for shitty behavior.

I’m going to have an all-about-me moment which I hope isn’t too obnoxious. Yesterday (?) I said something about how ableist language hurts me, others here, and a wider community, and I hope it didn’t come off like what Brooke is describing. What I meant is it causes measurable harm to the lives of disabled people. I apologize if it came out as “mind your Ps and Qs because of my precious precious feeeelings.”

/all-about-me moment.

kittehserf
7 years ago

“Harms” rather than “hurts” – exactly.

LBT
LBT
7 years ago

RE: Argenti

Oh and LBT’s Borg critters are up,

Hooray! Thanks Argenti! And I’ve got Critter #7 right here: Einstein the Rat!

RE: Shaun DarthBatman Day

WPS means that you will not be held criminally liable for anything you ever do. Examples include… George Zimmerman

Um. George Zimmerman is Hispanic.

Brooked
Brooked
7 years ago

@Viscaria

’m going to have an all-about-me moment which I hope isn’t too obnoxious. Yesterday (?) I said something about how ableist language hurts me, others here, and a wider community, and I hope it didn’t come off like what Brooke is describing. What I meant is it causes measurable harm to the lives of disabled people. I apologize if it came out as “mind your Ps and Qs because of my precious precious feeeelings.”

/all-about-me moment.

Actually I didn’t do the greatest job expressing myself, because there’s absolutely nothing wrong with being personally offended or hurt by people saying “MRAs are awful people, it’s like they are mentally ill.”

I was being critical of how a couple of non-regular posters (one in particular, but I’m not going to name names), responded to people describing MRAs as mentally ill in a way I thought trivialized the issue.

They seemed to be suggesting that new posters merely need to fall in line and learn to avoid saying certain words in order to appease the regulars. I don’t like it when people correct ableist language in a way that seems to patronize, rather empathize with, the people directly hurt by the language and also fails to ask people to examine the moral implications of what they say.

To me that takes humanity and social responsibility out of the equation, and reduces the idea of privilege to PC pantomime that meant to placate minorities (who in turn are portrayed as being hyper-sensitive and overly demanding).

Again, Viscaria, I don’t discount feelings like yours, in fact I hate when people dismiss the hurt they cause rather than own up to their own behavior. In my case, I can’t believe how flippant I’ve been with ableist language when I’ve personally dealt with mental illness since adolescence. I don’t need to act more polite, I need to do better.

Hopefully all this at least makes some sense.

serrana
serrana
7 years ago

Yay, the critters are amazing, LBT. I can’t wait to see the tiger.

Brooked
Brooked
7 years ago

@auggziliary

When it comes to language, for example, when the term “torture” is used, I don’t think it means what the general public would think of under that term. Perhaps, if the child was kept from school and from other interactions with the outside world for eight months, that could qualify under some legal definition of “torture” which is defined as psychological duress.

If this creep bothered to read the article, he would have learned that the father wasn’t charged with Torture, it was the other defendant who was charged with Sexual Torture, which is a felony and is not “defined as psychological duress”.

If you check wistfulbreeze’s post history, his main hobby is making excuses and gaslighting in support of accused pedophiles, which is a hell of a way to use your free time.

Viscaria
Viscaria
7 years ago

@Brooked

I can’t believe how flippant I’ve been with ableist language when I’ve personally dealt with mental illness since adolescence.

All the relates. I have a persistent tendency, even now, to refer to myself as “crazy” in a derogatory fashion when I’m having a depressive episode or anxiety. It’s really hard to kick that particular habit because it’s so common.

CassandraSays
7 years ago

@ Brooked

Yep. For the record, this is also why I’m not on board with the whole “well you have to be careful what you say here” thing. It frames the community here’s unwillingness to tolerate ableism, racism, and so on as being a matter of them being oversensitive, and the problem as being the words used rather than the ideas behind the words.

Viscaria
Viscaria
7 years ago

Auggz, this stuff is too horrifying for words. That child abuse TW applies to the below as well.

He had a secret part of his life which was extremely illegal and extremely disgusting to our society’s mores…

Only the worst kind of human would refer to prohibitions about child sexual abuse as “extremely disgusting to our society’s mores,” like it’s some arbitrary western idea that we should not do violence to children.

People are dynamic. They make mistakes.

Abusing children is not a mistake. This man chose to inflict horrors on his own son.

CassandraSays
7 years ago

Having an interesting hobby makes a person dynamic. Selling their child to pedophiles makes them a criminal.

kittehserf
7 years ago

This site is the one I’d say least fits the “you have to be careful what you say here” mould. That brings up places like Shakesville, which seems to have degenerated to an ego trip for the founder, where anything at all will get you banned, or to a lesser extent, Feministe, where they sometimes seem to take the sub-head about “defending the sanctimonious women’s studies set” far too seriously.

This place is for mocking misogyny, and we have a hell of a lot of fun with that and other stuff, and OT is on topic half the time. “Don’t use sexist/racist/trans*phobic/homophobic/ableist terms and don’t be an asshat about your religious/political beliefs” isn’t such a huge thing to ask, is it? Is it? It’s hardly the walking on eggshells some people seem to think.

Rahu
Rahu
7 years ago

@Brooked –

While you did not name names, am I correct in assuming that I am one of those “couple of” offenders that you mentioned?

CassandraSays
7 years ago

@ Kittehs

Exactly, which is another reason that my patience with that attitude has run out. If that makes me a mean meanie, oh well.

cloudiah
7 years ago

I’m going to steal some of this discussion for when I get around to updating the welcome package, but I will link to this thread so people can see who said what.

opheliamonarch
7 years ago

@Cloudiah, there was quite a long discussion about the recent outbreak of ableism on the ‘As The Worms Turn’ thread as well, just in case that helps.

Alice Sanguinaria
7 years ago

Seriously, I’m just tired of the ableism.

I’m aware that it’s really hard to kick the habit. I’m still working on it on meatspace, and I’ve caught myself using ableist phrases in my everyday thinking. But that’s because we don’t think about what we’re saying when we say that something is “insane” or that some idea is “crazy”. We’re not used to thinking about it, because in society, people with disabilities of any kind is demonized. And while things are slightly improving for people with physical disabilities, this is not the case with people with mental disabilities.

You wouldn’t call someone a [n-word] because black is bad and a black person should be ashamed. Why would you call an idea “insane” to express how terrible the idea is, when there’s better words for the same idea that doesn’t further stigmatize mental illness?

LBT
LBT
7 years ago

Well, that’s repulsive. Uuuuuggggghh.

And yeah, shit like this is why I feel like rape culture is something that extends to children of all genders. It’s like, no matter WHAT horrible thing you do to a child, SOMEONE will find some way to excuse it or pretend it never happened, all while analyzing exactly WHAT was done to the poor kid in this incredibly creepy invasive way.

Good on the Redditors for bringing the thumbs-down.

Alice Sanguinaria
7 years ago

auggzilliary – *gags* The apologia is disgusting.

lana
lana
7 years ago

Yes, but thanks to you I’ve finally figured out how to quote on here! *said with joy and embarrassment of not being able to figure this out myself 😉

You’re welcome . Someone else helped me so we pay if forward .

If you need help just ask me .I was confused too. Even after I read the welcome package!

Brooked
Brooked
7 years ago

@Rahu

Actually no, you weren’t who I was referring to. In fact I had no idea why you would think that until I went back to ‘As the worms turn’ thread and reread your post about feeling overwhelmed by regulars “correcting” new posters. While I don’t agree with you, I thought it was a perfectly reasonable comment in which you expressed your opinion. I have no problem with that then or now.

In the end, I’m concerned that many of the regulars, who generally do a great job of politely correcting new posters, have reached their boiling point. I’m relatively new, but I do have a lot of affection for this board because the regulars here are quite funny, genuinely accepting and can discuss feminism without threads turning into Feministe-style sensitivity training death spirals.

Luckily it sounds like Cloudiah will ride to the rescue and put something in the welcome package so posters doesn’t have to play language cop every time a newbie drops an ableist stinker.

cloudiah
7 years ago

In the end, I’m concerned that many of the regulars, who generally do a great job of politely correcting new posters, have reached their boiling point.

Me too. 0_o

LBT
LBT
7 years ago

If it helps at all, I feel totally willing and able to keep calling out the driveby-ers day and night. It’s what I come here for!

CassandraSays
7 years ago

I’m willing to do it, I’m just unwilling to be super polite about it, especially with repeat offenders and/or people who whine about how haarrrddd it is not to get yelled at here.

LBT
LBT
7 years ago

Polite?

THIS
IS
MANBOOOOOOBZ

*kicks troll into Freudian pit filled with Georgia O’Keefe art*

Argenti Aertheri
7 years ago

Urgh, more of the sexual abuse trigger warning.

“after conviction, sex offenders have very low recidivism rates as compared to the general prison population.”

So much wrongness. I mean, unless we include like…drug possession and sex workers (who, I’ll note, are frequently not harming anyone) sex offenders have some of the highest recidivism rates.

And how is selling a child for sex not causing psychological distress? How is keeping a kid out of school worse than that?!

kittehserf
7 years ago

In the end, I’m concerned that many of the regulars, who generally do a great job of politely correcting new posters, have reached their boiling point.

Double, double, toil and trouble
Fire burn and cauldron bubble

::cackles::

CassandraSays
7 years ago

The newbies aren’t really the problem though, as annoying as newbie ableist comments are. It’s the people who’ve been asked to stop and decided not to, or the people who’ve been asked to stop who’ve turned that into a reason to drama llama.

Argenti Aertheri
7 years ago

Tangentially related to the “crazy” talk…I just realized I somehow twisted my bedding 90° while asleep. Now, I am notorious for making my sleeping quarters look like a micro tornado landed on the bed, but this is a new one by me. (My sleep, if it can be called such, is the land of insomnia and nightmares, like, I warned my pharm student before I first stayed over, woke up to “wow, you weren’t kidding!”)

But perfectly 90°?! I don’t exactly think my usual “you try my nightmares, see what you do to the bed” answers this one. Did someone let gremlins loose in my room?

kittehserf
7 years ago

Argenti – I’ve managed to get my top sheet twisted that badly (no nightmares, I just roll over a lot in bed) but not the bottom sheet! It just ends up a twisted mess in the middle of the bed, but not at right angles.

Cassandra – Yeah, the HOW DARE YOU INFRINGE ON MY FREEZE PEACH complainers are the real pains.

Speaking of drama llamas, I just found this pic. We’ve had a few of that kind …

http://i693.photobucket.com/albums/vv297/GothBoyUK/DramaLlama.jpg

Argenti Aertheri
7 years ago

My stance on sheets — fitted bottom sheet, no top sheet. Because I can manage to accidentally restrain myself in a twisted top sheet. (You know those smooth fuzzy hotel blankets? Do they have those there? I use one of those instead of a top sheet)

misery
misery
7 years ago

I nearly broke down today after someone insisted on calling me delusional, so I’m in an anti-ableism mood. 🙁

By the way I do think we should make a distinction with regards to ableism. I think that calling people r***** is different from calling them crazy. Both are bad, but the former is more like victimizing an actual group of people with down syndrome (similar to slurs about ethnicity I guess?), while the latter is more like a generic ableist comment not as immediately vile but still very problematic. If that makes sense?

Viscaria
Viscaria
7 years ago

I used to turn my sheets 90 degrees all the time when I was a kid, though it doesn’t happen much anymore. I think I would toss and turn and twist the sheets around, and then I would grab for the nearest corner to straighten them out; but if I had already rotated the sheets a little bit, the closest corner wasn’t the right one anymore.

Argenti Aertheri
7 years ago

Misery — I’m not sure I agree with your logic why we should make that distinction, but it does sorta make sense that calling people r*****s, etc, is really obviously wrong, whereas words like “crazy” are still widely used. The latter I can see as an honest mistake, the former not.

And I’m sorry some ass decided to be an ass and call you delusional.

Viscaria — particularly since it was far too hot in my room and I only had my hotel style blanket and one microfiber that gets stuck to it, that’s entirely possibly wtf I did. (Yeah, too hot in New England at Christmas, I blame the 90g~ of 78° water in my room. ALL THE FISH TANKS!)

Skye
Skye
7 years ago

Brooked, I think this “The real problem with ableism is that equating bad ideas, failed logic, idiotic behavior and social bias with mental illness supports the idea that douche bags who commit fucked up, socially unacceptable and morally wrong acts and the mentally ill should both be judged, ridiculed and stigmatized in the same manner” explains the problem perfectly.

This is what I got from the posters here. I didn’t think about those types of comments much before reading this blog. Now I’ve learned how such statements can do a lot of damage.

kittehserf
7 years ago

Argenti – we may have those blankets here, but I’ve never had to buy blankets so wouldn’t know.

Shaun DarthBatman Day
7 years ago

LBT, he is “white” for a given value of white, and I know *I’ve* had enough “Zimmerman’s Hispanic so it wasn’t racially motivated and neither was the lack of conviction” to last me a lifetime. Let me leave it with this. If you can “pass” (like I can), then you are afforded white privilege (like I am). Zimmerman can “pass” regardless of geneology, therefore he is given white privilege. Hispanic is so broad a term as to be meaningless.

And I realise it is not that cut and dry, but the police refered to him as “white” throughout, which gave a huge bias right from the start.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/03/29/trayvon-martin-case-georg_n_1387711.html

Shadow
Shadow
7 years ago

@argenti

Thanks for the tip

@kitteh’s

I had an unbelievable blast in Aus!! Unfortunately Melbourne and Sydney were unseasonably cold and rainy when we were there, but the weather was gorgeous in the Gold Coast, and hot as hell in Perth (which was actually a welcome change all things considered :P)

Bina
Bina
7 years ago

“after conviction, sex offenders have very low recidivism rates as compared to the general prison population.”

O RLY???

If we’re talking “teenager who slept with his slightly younger, underage girlfriend, with no Romeo and Juliet provision”, maybe so. But in the case of a father who abused and pimped his own kid to multiple other men, that’s got repeat offender written all over it. In big red capital letters.

kittehserf
7 years ago

Shadow, that’s great!

I was thinking of you on the days you were in Melbourne – I’m sorry coffee didn’t get to be A Thing – and much as I like unseasonably cold weather, I did think the timing was pretty crap!

John Smith
John Smith
7 years ago

“after conviction, sex offenders have very low recidivism rates as compared to the general prison population.”

I’m pretty sure, whatever the gender of the perpetrator that this isn’t the case.

I’m sure any UK, US Or CA Government stats database can easily allay this assertion.

scribblerg
7 years ago

So he changes his mind and that’s a big problem? Huh. Me? Anonymous rape reporting is absurd. The reason we have a criminal justice system is to balance the rights of victims against the rights of the accused, while logical search for the truth is undertaken. An individual’s claim of a crime is nowhere near the standard required to assess a claim. Period. And the admin said that she was using it to identify that 4% of men who are serial rapists.

This dialog proceeds as though there already aren’t Star Chamber like proceedings on college campuses where men who are accused have their rights violated, and don’t exist on a continuum with other bizarre procedures like “no contact” orders. I was speaking with two female students at my local college, Keene State, recently about what it was like between the boys and girls on campus and she proceeded to tell me a story about a boy who had been a bit of a jerk to her, as she put. He didn’t threaten her, harass her, stalk her, sexually assault her – but just was rude to her. She went to some person on campus who told her to get a “no contact” order, just to be safe, even though there was no issue of sexual harassment going on. It was quite strange to hear her discuss it. she even said, “He didn’t do anything to deserve it but I did so because the administrator told me I should.” These “no contact” orders are supposed to be only for cases where there has been sexual misconduct of some sort, like a breakup or following or bothering or asking out too many times. Not for any social transgression.

But you see, this power was handed to this 20 yr old girl and she was egged on by someone in the administration to misuse it. This is now on that boy’s college record and can be used against him as part of a pattern – and he did nothing that warranted that action against him. So please, don’t try to tell us that an anonymous rape reporting system won’t be misused – why wouldn’t this be too? It’s just another lopsided privilege granted to women.

Even worse is the motivation for it in the first place. Actual reports of rape and sexual assault are so low at colleges that even if you use a 95% assumption of under reporting, the figures would still be an order of magnitude off from the ridiculous statistics reported by junk “studies” which inflated the numbers of sexual assaults actually occurring in the first place. Feminists are shown to be building their belief system on a foundation of nonsense by what actually happens in the real world, so they seek to juke reality to continue with their BS like “rape culture theory” and all the rest of it.

You want to do the right thing? Encourage women to report every sexual assault and rape to the proper authorities. Cops today are incredibly sensitive to handling the reporting of such crimes with respect and privacy. Although the actual investigation may be less fun as in the real world, corroboration and consistency and plausibility etc all enter into one’s credibility – and goodness, women are too tender to deal with all that yukky reason and logic and fact stuff. Lol, what a joke the entire movement has become.

Ally S
7 years ago

Anonymous rape reporting is absurd. The reason we have a criminal justice system is to balance the rights of victims against the rights of the accused, while logical search for the truth is undertaken. An individual’s claim of a crime is nowhere near the standard required to assess a claim. Period. And the admin said that she was using it to identify that 4% of men who are serial rapists.

This anonymous report form isn’t design to replace the criminal justice system. It just allows victims to report what happened to them. And if the perpetrator is named, they are just requested to meet with someone who will just remind them of the college sexual assault policy and tell them that, if the accusation is true, they need to stop their behavior. Nothing beyond that. And of course victims don’t even have to mention the perpetrator’s name.

The reason this anonymous report form exists is precisely because most victims don’t report to the police. Many victims are doubted and accused of lying. And many of those who don’t make official reports still want to report their victimization to campus administrators. Yes, false accusations are possible, but the form actually discourages false reporting because the most severe consequence is that the accused will be asked to stop harming others should the accusation(s) be true.

Shiraz
Shiraz
7 years ago

Scribblerg, stop talking out of your ass.

You posted this:

“Even worse is the motivation for it in the first place. Actual reports of rape and sexual assault are so low at colleges that even if you use a 95% assumption of under reporting, the figures would still be an order of magnitude off from the ridiculous statistics reported by junk “studies” which inflated the numbers of sexual assaults actually occurring in the first place.”

Pretty sure you have no real data to back this up. Especially considering that the rape conviction rate is pretty fucking low.

Then you went on to post this:

“Feminists are shown to be building their belief system on a foundation of nonsense by what actually happens in the real world, so they seek to juke reality to continue with their BS like “rape culture theory” and all the rest of it.”

You don’t know what rape culture is, do you, Sparky?
Have you read this?

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/crime/9134799/Sexual-assault-survey-80-of-women-dont-report-rape-or-sexual-assault-survey-claims.html

or this:

http://www.rainn.org/get-information/statistics/reporting-rates

cloudiah
7 years ago

Cops today are incredibly sensitive to handling the reporting of such crimes with respect and privacy.

Oh, my sides! Are you serious?

Are you thinking of these cops? Or maybe you’re thinking of these cops? Or maybe you can find us some other proof of the existence of these sensitive cops who handle things with respect and privacy?

Although the actual investigation may be less fun as in the real world, corroboration and consistency and plausibility etc all enter into one’s credibility – and goodness, women are too tender to deal with all that yukky reason and logic and fact stuff.

Read those two stories above, and then provide us with your definition of “fun.” And connect the cops’ behavior to reason/logic/facts. You fucking asshole.

Lol, what a joke the entire movement has become.

If you mean the MRM, you may have a point.

Viscaria
Viscaria
7 years ago

was speaking with two female students at my local college, Keene State, recently about what it was like between the boys and girls on campus and she proceeded to tell me a story about a boy who had been a bit of a jerk to her, as she put. He didn’t threaten her, harass her, stalk her, sexually assault her – but just was rude to her. She went to some person on campus who told her to get a “no contact” order, just to be safe, even though there was no issue of sexual harassment going on. It was quite strange to hear her discuss it. she even said, “He didn’t do anything to deserve it but I did so because the administrator told me I should.”

Super convincing story bro.

Argenti Aertheri
7 years ago

Thank you cloudiah. My poor tender self, woman or not, is unable to deal with that logic and reason and fact stuff.

TW: rape (and this may get graphic, we’re entering That Season)

That Season? Rapist ex #1 was St. Patrick’s day, and my mental state will only get worse until after then. And I’m sure pressing charges wouldn’t have been fun, I mean, I was underage and falling down pulling drunk, that alone would’ve had my father, fuck the police, up my ass sideways (actually, at that point he’d have probably been a bigger threat to my safety than That Night was)

“corroboration and consistency and plausibility etc all enter into one’s credibility”

Corroboration — hmm, you mean the other people there either involved or taking photos? Which were supposedly deleted the next day? (To the decent people here — I was told that by the only person there I think has a conscience, so I’m inclined to believe he sobered up and went “oh shit, wtf happened here last night?!”)

Consistency — well, let’s see, I can kinda sorta almost out things in order, but am missing massive gaps of time, cuz, you know, hard to sort out what happened between puking episodes. Or name the other guy when I didn’t know him before that night and couldn’t remember his first name the next day, all I knew about him and told to me by said rapist ex, who, obviously, had reason to lie. Or do you mean the part where I’m unclear just how many people where watching? Cuz, you know, PASS OUT DRUNK

Plausibility — oh yeah, totally never had that questioned, not once. Only like, every time I go into details, and I expect it from you. I mean, who would believe that someone would ply their partner with alcohol until they were drunk enough to be unable to walk, call some buddies, demand side by side blowjobs and then coerce said partner into fucking one of those buddies? I mean, coerce, not like I was held down or anything, nobody threatened my life or pulled a weapon, so I totally fucking consented right?!

Incredibly sensitive? So there’s no way the fact the ex and I had had consensual sex earlier that evening would’ve come up? Nobody would’ve questioned if I was threatened or injured? Not, you know, my psych? Nawh, the cops totally would’ve been more sensitive!

In summary — you are a complete fucking asshole with no idea how the real world works if you think cops are sensitive, or that victims don’t report just because it won’t be FUN. Because wtf they’d be reporting was so fun that the annoyance of reporting it is enough to dissuade people from reporting. Nothing to do with it taking nearly a decade and being COMPLETELY OUT OF PATIENCE to even say that much (oh, and that after nearly two years here being sure that you’ll be torn to shreds by the others here if you come after me for this comment). Nawh, nothing of the fucking sort. Reporting it just wouldn’t have been FUN!

Your utter lack of compassion, or logic, goes well beyond hoping you step on legos, instead I hope you wake up some day and realize just how horrible you are. And then you live a long healthy life, having to live everyday with the knowledge that your views went so far beyond wrong as to perpetuate the very bullshit that keeps people from reporting.

——

Everyone else — well that was carthartic, remind me to go off on trolls more often. Oh and y’all now know more than my psychs since they so clearly don’t give a shit and just want to project their own biases. Now I have a pharm student and mango hater to poke in hopes one or both are still awake to calm me down.

kittehserf
7 years ago

Hey, y’all know what corroboration is – it’s those four reliable male witnesses, because you can’t possibly believe someone identified as female when she says a thing happened.

cloudiah
7 years ago

Argenti, I would offer to help calm you down but I am crashing. 18-hour days at the hospital, plus traveling by bus to avoid $15/day parking charges, are kind of wearing me down. I hope pecunium and/or pharm student are around. Hang in there, okay?

All the non-contact hugs and fishy pictures.

G’night.

Alice Sanguinaria
7 years ago

To the troll – I hope you someday wake up and realize what a terrible person you are.

Argenti and cloudiah – *adds lots of hugs to hug barrel*

Argenti Aertheri
7 years ago

Cloudiah — get some sleep, at least my problem here is long past. I wish you and family well!

Pecunium’s calling it a night too, but sorta helped. No word from pharm student, but not surprised, that whole grad student thing.

And I get better than fishy pics, me, my mother, brother, and his best friend are trekking to the supposedly awesome fish and reptile store tomorrow (brother and his friend co-parent a snake). Idk if I’m getting fish, cuz the 55g is the only one that can really take fish, and I want a plec and loaches, but I don’t have a head count on the baby cories yet. Goal is decor // play things for puff. So yeah, all freaked out, but getting my little dude some toys tomorrow. It’s funny, I got mostly aquarium stuff for Christmas, and am now going to spend Christmas money on them. Because really, what do I need besides the satisfaction of babying my babies?

So thanks guys, troll may be upsetting, but y’all are, as always, awesome.