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Men's Rights Redditors try to call out misogyny, fail (BONUS BIGOTRY: The misogyny caller-outer posts to the White Rights subreddit)

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So my post yesterday pointed out a rather extravagantly misogynistic post by the Men’s Rights Activist behind the blog Men Against Misandry. If you read it, you probably remember the money quote from his post, which he was so proud of he posted separately on Facebook:

If women sucked dick half as well as they suck at sports there would be no more divorces in the great US of A.

Today a new commenter here on Man Boobz, evidently an MRA irritated that I had quoted his comrade, posted a link to a discussion on the Men’s Rights subreddit that went up a couple of hours ago, and that specifically disavowed this quotation, declaring “This is NOT who we are, and this is NOT Okay.” The thread, when last I checked, had gotten nearly 800 upvotes from the Men’s Rights regulars.

I thought to myself, “wow, a rare moment of self-reflection, and self-policing, from MRAs!”

But then I started reading the comments.

Many of the Men’s Rights regulars seemed less bothered by the reference to blow jobs in itself than by the implication that better blow jobs would lower the divorce rate. Because, you see, most divorces are initiated by women for nefarious womanly reasons.

As JoshTheAspie put it:

JoshtheAspie 14 points 1 hour ago (16|2)  ... leaving aside any offense or outrage... what he's saying doesn't even make sense.  80% of divorces are initiated by women. How would them being better at sexually pleasuring husbands reduce the amount of divorce?      permalink     source     save     give gold     hide child comments  [–]1standarduser -1 points 1 hour ago (2|3)  happier men make better husbands which makes the women happier.  This is only assuming the 20 minutes of sucking is a lesser burden than 24hrs of an unhappy partner.

Meanwhile, here’s one of the top comments in the thread, and the discussion it spawned. Notice the reaction to sad_woman, after she offers a criticism of uberpower’s “argument.” Also, notice uberpower’s own reaction.

uberpower 30 points 1 hour ago (35|5)  Divorces will decrease when men's finances get gender-neutral protection.  Remove the divorce incentive for women, increase two parent families, increase the success of our nation's children.      permalink     source     save     give gold     hide child comments  [–]Pecanpig 6 points 1 hour ago (6|0)  The former would probably cause the latter.      permalink     source     save     parent     give gold  [–]sad_woman -16 points 44 minutes ago (4|20)  you people are seriously fucking warped. this sentiment is more offensive than the one in op's pic. i gotta go take a fucking shower after stepping into this place, christ      permalink     source     save     parent     give gold  [–]RZRtv 6 points 41 minutes ago (7|1)  gb2SRS plz.      permalink     source     save     parent     give gold  [–]uberpower 2 points 23 minutes ago (5|3)  Aww, you don't want to lose the right to entice a man then dump him for half of everything he's got?  Is your ex-man paying for your shower sweetie?      permalink     source     save     parent     give gold  [–]JimiJons 1 point 7 minutes ago (1|0)  Nothing about what he said is warped or offensive in the slightest. Perhaps you read it wrong, and simply reacted in an extraordinarily unwarranted manner.

If you’re puzzled by RZRtv’s cryptic comment, he is suggesting that sad_woman go back to the ShitRedditSays subreddit, a subreddit devoted to calling out various bigotries on Reddit, and which is regarded by most of Reddit with the same sort of wild-eyed horror and contempt with which Men’s Rightsers regard Man Boobz.

Knucker2, meanwhile, thought that the dick-sucking reference detracted from Men Against Misandry’s other truly valuable points:

knucker2 6 points 1 hour ago (7|1)  I agree. I think the phrase "its offensive* is an extremely weak criticism. It's more accurate and more persuasive to criticize this post for being unconstructive, intentionally inflammatory, and poorly communicating his point.  People are going to get distracted by the dick sucking reference and ignore the valuable points about double standards. If you are going to be inflammatory, then at least do it in a way that keeps people on topic. This is distracting.

As you may recall from my post yesterday, the main point of Men Against Misandry’s “argument” was that women suck at sports. Indeed, the title of his post was “Gender inequality in sports: male athletes paid more. (HINT: women’s sports suck)”

And then there was this enlightening exchange, featuring none other than A Voice for Men’s TyphonBlue and her signature brand of double-reverse whammy logic:

Young_Ocelot 4 points 1 hour ago (6|2)  Holy crap this looks really bad...I hope no one takes that and blanket applies it to the mindset of all men.      permalink     source     save     give gold     hide child comments  [–]typhonblue 1 point 1 hour ago (4|3)  Only idiots would extrapolate this to all men.  Now if the gender reverse was published in huffpo by a feminist writer... or similar sentiments were repeated over and over by numerous women... or if it was expressed to applause on a mainstream daytime tv show...

First of all, Young_Ocelot — who seems a bit naive even for a young ocelot — WHY WOULD YOU THINK ANYONE WOULD ASSUME ALL MEN THINK THIS WAY?! No one thinks that all men are raving misogynistic douchebags. However, there are quite a few people who think that a significant portion of Men’s Rights Activists are. For evidence, I would suggest reading, well, this post, or any of my other posts, or even the thread you were posting in.

And Typhon, poor deluded Typhon, do you really think that if someone wrote a HuffPost column arguing that if men were half as good at eating pussy as they were at sucking at sports the divorce rate would drop, they’d get applause? That doesn’t even make the slightest bit of sense.

And even if you adjust the “gender swap” a bit it doesn’t work. If men were half as good at eating pussy as they were at, I dunno, failing to ask for directions when they get lost while driving, there would be no divorce? Huh?

If Men’s Rights Activists were half as good at actually calling out their own misogyny as they are at loudly denying their misogyny while at the same time saying blatently misogynistic shit, well, I might have to shut down this blog.

EDITED TO ADD: BONUS BIGOTRY! The guy who posted the “this is not who we are” post to the Men’s Rights subreddit, our old nemesis Chris3992m,  also recently posted this in the White Rights subreddit. When he was called out for this on AgainstMensRights, he explained that “I only post when there are real issues of white discrimination.”

He also believes that “[m]ost whites during the slave era were actually treated WORSE than the slaves. They had to work for the slaves, because they couldn’t be bought and sold and were considered useless by slaveowners.”

EDITED TO ADD AGAIN: Since I wrote this post, more Men’s Rights Redditors have posted comments more directly disavowing the misogyny of the original “blowjob” quote. If they are sincere about trying to remove the stain of misogyny from the Men’s Rights movement, I would suggest that they also try to convince the subreddit’s mods to remove the links to blatantly misogynistic and hateful websites like A Voice for Men from the subreddit’s sidebar, and that they do a better job of policing the misogyny that pervades the subreddit, many examples of which can be found by looking through the Man Boobz archives for Reddit here.

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grumpycatisagirl
11 years ago

And quequoi, your new gravatar is overflowing with awesomesauce.

quequoi
11 years ago

serrana, I have lurked so long I think I know the welcome package by heart, but I love that you thought to offer. Thank you! 🙂

quequoi
11 years ago

grumpycatisagirl, Thanks!
That picture makes me melt into a puddle of happy goo every time.
Black lab / kitteh cuddles. <3

cloudiah
11 years ago

I love pictures of cat-dog affection. All is right with the world.

serrana
serrana
11 years ago

Aww, I love your gravatar, quequoi. And now, kittehs, I would like a Sheltie of my own. (I would like a dog, but Mr. S. doesn’t want one, and I’m pretty happy with just cats most of the time.)

quequoi
11 years ago

kittehserf, I never understood if the MRAssholes at AVFM were pissed at Wooly Bumblebee because she sassed MGTOWers or because she hadn’t accounted for the funds she raised for the Earl Silverman Center.

Then again, I don’t understand much of what any of the MRAs do.

Viscaria
Viscaria
11 years ago

Animal best friends never fail to make me squee!

cloudiah
11 years ago

It’s not inter-species love, but this picture made me so happy.

cloudiah
11 years ago

And this, too — this is love.

quequoi
11 years ago

I am single and live in a small condo in a big city, and so pets for me are not an option, especially with the hours I work.
I think cloudiah just inspired me on a pet I could get though! 🙂
Hamster hugs are best hugs.

inurashii
inurashii
11 years ago

Not to worry, dog people are treated quite well here. ::wag::

sparky
sparky
11 years ago

He also believes that “[m]ost whites during the slave era were actually treated WORSE than the slaves. They had to work for the slaves, because they couldn’t be bought and sold and were considered useless by slaveowners.”

What’s even better, is he posted this in the responses to a post basically titled “B00BIES!!!!!” I mean, what?

And he can just step on all the Legos. Racist asshole.

Alice Sanguinaria
11 years ago

Obviously being enslaved is better than being the slave-owner. I mean, the slave-owner have to spend money to feed them, and pay for their health care and have to punish wrongdoers. Who wants to have to feed people you own anyways? Right guys?

[/sarcasm]

Viscaria
Viscaria
11 years ago

White supremacist worm.

serrana
serrana
11 years ago

He also believes that “[m]ost whites during the slave era were actually treated WORSE than the slaves. They had to work for the slaves, because they couldn’t be bought and sold and were considered useless by slaveowners.”

gross

grumpycatisagirl
11 years ago

OK. . . this slave privilege shit is just . . . really? You think it’s cool to say stuff like that?

I’m done with the world for tonight. Good night, all you non-terrible people, and thank you for reminding me that not all people are terrible.

Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

“I am single and live in a small condo in a big city, and so pets for me are not an option, especially with the hours I work.”

Get fish!

In an awwww distraction from this horror show, my genius puffer fish decided earlier that nibbling the pipette for another brine shrimp was a better idea than going after the one that was sinking. Once I could understand, but he did this repeatedly. And I’ve been spoiling him with live snails (I have way too many in the breeding tank [they just got switched to crumbled adult food btw]) — hunting snails is apparently so much work that he can’t the bothered to swm a few inches and would rather try and eat plastic. I swear at one point he was straight vertical under the pipette and probably sucking on it if fish can do that (I know plecs can [duh] but no clue on puffers)

In less cute, if I followed correctly, my father wants my mother to take him to the doctor tomorrow cuz he’s too drunk. I think that’s one of those self-proving statements — you do indeed have to be too drunk for that to make any fucking sense!

On topic…yes, keep your inflammatory statements on topic! That’ll totally help your movement! People associating your topic with them being angry won’t hurt your cause at all, nope, never happen, impossible. More likely than a puffer fish sucking a pipette…wait a second!

Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

I require an intervention, I’ve fallen down a reddit rabbit hole about how trans* lesbians can’t exist. Or something like that. “Why can’t people just be normal!” Uh, I tried that, it doesn’t work.

kittehserf
11 years ago

I think puffer is training you, Argenti. Look at me … I am poor cute fish … Look at my big sad fish eyes … You can’t expect a poor little fish to feed zirself …

kittehserf
11 years ago

What’s so wonderful about normal, anyway?

marinerachel
11 years ago

Divorced women with children are worth less than 25% of what divorced men with children are worth in Canada soooooo someone’s going to have to explain this whole financial incentive thing to me. Divorce is costly for everyone and lots of people never recover from it but divorced dads, on average are worth roughly $80,000 while moms in Canada are only worth about $17,000. That suggests staying with the guy would have been significantly more financially beneficial.

Ally S
11 years ago

Lol, YetAnotherCommenter is posting again with their Logical Rational Analysis of misandry:

Men are objectified in the Kantian sense, i.e. treated as a means to an end rather than ends in themselves (read Nussbaum’s Objectification for more – she describes this as “Instrumentality” and classes it as a form of Objectification). True, traditional gender norms do not deny or marginalize male agency (like they do for female agency), however they socially emasculate males who do not employ that agency in a socially useful fashion. This is a different kind of Objectification to the kind that women suffer, but it is Objectification nonetheless.

I like how they undermine the argument they’re trying to make by actually admitting that gender norms deny and marginalize female agency. That’s like the core of what the patriarchy is, and its existence completely invalidates that of institutionalized misandry.

kittehserf
11 years ago

They’re so desperate to paint themselves as victims, aren’t they?

augochlorella
augochlorella
11 years ago

Even beyond admitting that women are denied agency, he still undoes his own argument.

however they socially emasculate males who do not employ that agency in a socially useful fashion.

By his argument, men who misuse their agency are emasculated, meaning they are feminized, meaning they are less powerful than they were when they were “masculated”. Women are only immune from this, from what I can parse from his reasoning, because they were never masculine in the first place, so they can’t be taken to a lower level.

So yeah, not very convincing logic.

Ally S
11 years ago

Also, yes, men are encouraged to be competitive, but that’s because men are seen as people with agency (or at least deserving of agency) within a capitalist system that encourages competition. In other words, men are raised into a position of socioeconomic privilege because of their maleness, yet they are oppressed via class stratification because they are bound by capitalist society. This isn’t even taking into account the fact that women – especially single mothers – are disproportionately affected by poverty.