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antifeminism divorce evil fat fatties evil sexy ladies evil short-haired women men who should not ever be with women ever misogyny patriarchy rape culture reactionary bullshit red pill straw feminists

Manosphere blogger: “Feminism is a morbidly obese, sexually promiscuous, short-haired, tattooed, cussing beast whom no man can ever love or trust.”

Beta male oppressed by feminism.
Beta male oppressed by feminism.

Does anyone read newspaper comics any more? Does anyone even remember reading newspaper comics? One of the worst of the bunch is a mawkish little one-panel strip called “Love is …,” with a simple formula: a little drawing of a plump, happy, naked couple (minus sex organs), with a caption starting off with the words “love is.” The more popular strips were turned into greeting cards. I actually have an oil painting someone made of the Love is couple that I found in a thrift store for $1.47. The caption: “Love is … letting him win once in a while.”

The strip began in 1970, and the creator turned it over to the current writer and artist in 1975. I have no fucking idea how on earth he can come up with a new “love is” caption every day. His life must be some kind of existential hell. He must spend hours just staring out the window looking for inspiration. Love is … a dog taking a shit, no. Love is … a fat guy waiting for a bus … no. Love is … sitting alone in my underwear wondering what has gone wrong with my life.

Anyway, the reactionary Manosphere blogger Dicipres has decided to do a similar thing with the phrase “feminism is.” Only without the little naked couple. Here are some of his captions-without-pictures.

Feminism is a morbidly obese, sexually promiscuous, short-haired, tattooed, cussing beast whom no man can ever love or trust.

Feminism is a family which hates itself.

Feminism is a line drawn inside your home between you and your wife.

Feminism is a woman furious over ‘rape culture’ and who masturbates while fantasizing being beaten and raped. …

Feminism is a woman who cannot be loved anymore since she hates the domineering man she lusts and sexually despises the submissive man she likes.

Feminism is alimony and every other weekend

Feminism is a son hating his father

Feminism is equality as the only measure for progress of a society …

Feminism is a demographic annihilation due to low birth rates

Yeah. I don’t think any of those are going to work as greeting cards.

And what do these guys have against women with short hair?

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freemage
freemage
7 years ago

You know, I just remembered… one of my earliest exposures to dirty jokes came in the form of a “Love is…” parody that was anatomically correct, with the caption, “… helping each other get up in the morning” (with each of them ‘lifting’ a bit of the other’s anatomy). That would’ve been over thirty-five years ago. Amazing what bits dig into the back of your brain.

LBT
LBT
7 years ago

Feminism is a morbidly obese, sexually promiscuous, short-haired, tattooed, cussing beast whom no man can ever love or trust.

Funny. The folks I know who’re like that actually have multiple happy poly relationships. Could it possibly be because they’re an awesome person?

Feminism is a woman furious over ‘rape culture’ and who masturbates while fantasizing being beaten and raped. …

Feminism is a woman who apparently can tell her fantasies from reality. MISANDRY!

Feminism is a woman who cannot be loved anymore since she hates the domineering man she lusts and sexually despises the submissive man she likes.

Feminism means dommes don’t exist!

Feminism is a demographic annihilation due to low birth rates

Oh god, there’s only SEVEN BILLION human beings! WE’RE ALL GOING TO DIE! Speaking of someone who can’t tell fantsy from reality…

RE: Kittehs

Feminism is a kayak with a poop deck.

My husband made this face.

RE: lana

Actually, chromosomes don’t conform to people’s bodies nearly as clearly as people think. You can be XY and a cis woman. You can be XX and a cis man. That’s not even including the variety of intersex conditions and how they interact with human development. So asking someone’s chromosomes — especially when very few people actually get them tested — is a pretty rude question generally.

RE: scarletpipistrelle

Um, alimony is not awarded much any more. Almost never in states like mine. (which by now is most states)

It still does happen, though. *points to trans friend who lost a lot of money in their divorce, THEN lost their job, THEN had to shell out for surgery, all within the space of a month or two*

lana
lana
7 years ago

Actually, chromosomes don’t conform to people’s bodies nearly as clearly as people think. You can be XY and a cis woman. You can be XX and a cis man. That’s not even including the variety of intersex conditions and how they interact with human development. So asking someone’s chromosomes — especially when very few people actually get them tested — is a pretty rude question generally.

And I apologize for that I stuck my foot in my mouth and I’m embarrased. I did not intend to be insensitive. I think cis is the word I meant . That is a new word for me .I was only just exposed to it a few months ago so its no part of my “on hand” vocabulary yet.

And I do understand (just learned) that chromosomes can for lack of better terms “blend ” into one or the other .Where “technically” (chromosome wise) they are XX or XY.

Anyway it was an ignorant thing to ask and I’m sorry that I offended anyone.

lana
lana
7 years ago

I meant technically they AREN’T XX or XY .(inter sexed)

lana
lana
7 years ago

Feminism is a line drawn inside your home between you and your wife.

Feminism is a woman retaining the right to say no sex EVEN though she made the mistake of marrying you .For whatever reason. And a really good reason is if she realizes you are an insensitive ass hole . And she can divorce your ass and not be trapped into sex bondage being legally raped.

lana
lana
7 years ago

And what do these guys have against women with short hair?

I don’t think he would if she looks like Halle Berry or Princes Di and is willing to have sex with him.

lana
lana
7 years ago

cussing

Ooooh …you said a bad word ……I’m telling on you !

La Strega
7 years ago

“Tattooed?” Check. “Obese?” Check. “Short hair?” Check. “Promiscuous?” Check. “Cussing?” Check.

Damn, he nailed me.

I AM FEMINISM.

kittehserf
7 years ago

::bows::

All hail La Strega!

RE: Kittehs

Feminism is a kayak with a poop deck.

My husband made this face.

And what a lovely face it is! 😀

sparky
sparky
7 years ago

Behold! The fat, short-haired cussing beasts of feminism:


http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=6QNoDzojjkw

Brz
Brz
7 years ago

Feminism might be a little bit overweight, but a cussing beast, it surely ain’t : feminism is the insecure girl who never found the courage to “speak up” whenever a guy said shit about women (or just expressed an opinion she disagreed with) and couldn’t help but remain silent, seething with rage. Eventually, she’s found an outlet for her anger on twitter where she can be the proud self-confident assertive cussing amazon who takes no shit from no wild dudebro she would like to be irl by participating (= by sending tweets in which she says that she’s angry, that she wants the guy to be fired and to have his balls chopped off) to the last harassment campaign launched by Jezebel against a guy who wrote something on the Internet.

If only there were more cussing beasts than frightened daddy’s girls out there, these kinds of wine-fueled debates we have during dinner parties would be more funny and more interesting, there would be less hysteria involved in the pubic debate, women would be more confident and less bitter, there would be less constipation issues : the world would be a better place to live in.

Ladies, help us create a better world : insult that big-mouthed guy you always wanted to slap who keep saying shit whenever an audience presents itself and let the Internet be what it should be, a place were the weirdos, the unemployed, the fanatics and the megalomaniacs from all over the world can ramble about stuff, tilt at imaginary windmills and occupy their time to meticulously solve problems which don’t exist.

LBT
LBT
7 years ago

You’re one to talk about rambling and solving nonexistent problems, Brz.

Also, you realize that feminism is a thing that happens off the Internet, right? Look at Wendy Davis!

sparky
sparky
7 years ago

…there would be less constipation issues : the world would be a better place to live in.

Constipation issues can be solved by incorporating more fiber into your diet, drinking plenty of water, and physical exercise. For occasional bouts of constipation, over-the-counter remedies like Dulcolax, Senna-Kot, and Miralax work well. If you ever experience constipation accompanied by vomiting, fever and intense abdominal pain, you need to get an ER right away. You might have perforated something.

kittehserf
7 years ago

Given brz is a shit who doesn’t get out enough, it’s no wonder he’s worried about constipation issues.

hellkell
hellkell
7 years ago

Brz: fuck off. You and your faux French have not been missed.

Lili Fugit
Lili Fugit
7 years ago

I’m sorry, Brz, I couldn’t hear you, I’m too busy lusting domineering men.

pecunium
7 years ago

Feminism is a line drawn inside your home between you and your wife.

The MRM is a line drawn down the Mississippi between men and women.

pecunium
7 years ago

Oh man… this is great:

Paul really should retire and let John take over.

If you’re disappointed in Paul, feel better by listening to the epic JTO v. Manhood Academy debate.

I wonder what Elam thinks of that.

kittehserf
7 years ago

Paul really should retire and let John take over.

But where does that leave George and Ringo?

pecunium
7 years ago

let the Internet be what it should be, a place were the weirdos, the unemployed, the fanatics and the megalomaniacs from all over the world can ramble about stuff, tilt at imaginary windmills and occupy their time to meticulously solve problems which don’t exist.

Says a dude on the internet.

vaiyt
7 years ago

“feminism is the insecure girl who never found the courage to “speak up” whenever a guy said shit about women (or just expressed an opinion she disagreed with) and couldn’t help but remain silent, seething with rage. Eventually, she’s found an outlet for her anger on twitter where she can be the proud self-confident assertive cussing amazon who takes no shit from no wild dudebro she would like to be irl by participating (= by sending tweets in which she says that she’s angry, that she wants the guy to be fired and to have his balls chopped off) to the last harassment campaign launched by Jezebel against a guy who wrote something on the Internet.”

becoz feminism only exists and ever existed on the internets amirite

protip: try pulling this shit on arab feminists and they’ll cut your balls off

Bina
Bina
7 years ago

Ladies, help us create a better world : insult that big-mouthed guy you always wanted to slap who keep saying shit whenever an audience presents itself and let the Internet be what it should be, a place were the weirdos, the unemployed, the fanatics and the megalomaniacs from all over the world can ramble about stuff, tilt at imaginary windmills and occupy their time to meticulously solve problems which don’t exist.

Fuck off, you bloviating asshole.

(Just taking your “advice”, ha ha.)

kittehserf
7 years ago

I notice the buzzing fly seems to have lost his French accent again.

10knives
10knives
7 years ago

“Boner, boner morning height,
In my bedroom in the night.
How can I make it go down?
When females won’t stay around?”

Burma Shave!

ALTERNATE JOKE;

Kick, punch, it’s all in the mind
If you want to test me, I’ll do ya fine
I’m the teacher
I’m sure to beat cha

SredniVashtar
SredniVashtar
7 years ago

‘Feminism is a woman furious over ‘rape culture’ and who masturbates while fantasizing being beaten and raped.’

I love this and agree with it totally. Dude was actually accidentally pretty right-on with that one.

vaiyt
7 years ago

Sure, SredniVashtar. Whatever.

Malitia
Malitia
7 years ago

And to think that I was accused* of not being able to tell fantasy and reality apart.:/

* for being a tabletop roleplayer, for liking anime, etc..

LBT
LBT
7 years ago

SredniVashtar, I fantasize about living in a giant motorhome and traveling the country. This doesn’t mean I ACTUALLY want to live in a giant motorhome. It DEFINITELY doesn’t mean I want some guy to FORCE me to live in a giant motorhome, cause me mental and physical damage to KEEP me in the motorhome, and then get self-righteous and whiny when I tell him that dammit, I don’t want to live in a giant motorhome!

Why is this so hard for people?

kittehserf
7 years ago

SredniVashtar, I think you need to clarify what you meant. The slimeball in the original post was pretty well showing he doesn’t get the difference between fantasising and reality, and that women are hypocrites for talking about the rape culture if they ever have rape fantasies. I’ve seen your comments before, I know you’re not trolling, but could you explain what you meant?

kittehserf
7 years ago

*and saying that women are hypocrites

NonServiam
NonServiam
7 years ago

Oh Brz, mon petit.

You think feminists are only fight online? Tell that to the fool who grabbed my ass today and got a black eye in return.

NonServiam
NonServiam
7 years ago

“only fight online” – oops, excuse the typo.

kittehserf
7 years ago

NonServiam, yay for you!

SredniVashtar
SredniVashtar
7 years ago

@kittehserf (& LBT & Malitia & vaiyt)

I just meant that I love the idea of a woman who is righteously furious about rape culture, and writes a blog or goes to a protest about it or whatever in the day time, and then in the night time she goes home and happily jills off over her own specific fantasies which hurt no-one, and she falls into a blissful guilt-free sleep and then the next day she wakes up and is all furious about rape culture some more. And i think that actually *is* a good description of what ‘(sex positive) feminism is’….you could rephrase it as ‘feminism is…a woman being furious about real power inequality while still being able to enjoy fake power inequality in a sexy way, because it doesn’t hurt anyone’. or ‘feminism is…being able to separate fantasy from reality’.

So I just think the asshat in the original post was *accidentally* sort of on the money with that one. He meant the woman in the example to seem like a hypocrite but actually she seems totally sane and rational and cool. Thanks for the benefit of the doubt kittehserf – I’m not a troll guys I promise!

kittehserf
7 years ago

Thanks for the clarification, SredniVashtar! I thought that’s what you might have been driving at, and it’s a good point – almost the opposite of what the sleazoid in the OP meant, curiously enough.

I remember your earlier comments and being not-a-troll – your nym’s hard to forget (fuck that was a chilling story). 🙂

SredniVashtar
SredniVashtar
7 years ago

I AM SO EXCITED YOU HAVE READ THAT STORY AND GET MY NYM! FORGIVE THE CAPITALS BUT THEY ARE TOTALLY WARRANTED! 😀

I read it as a child so it had that special resonance – I devoured Saki as a child, he’s got such a dark but sympathetic view of the child condition that rings so true. Did you ever read any of his others?

kittehserf
7 years ago

LOL I can’t take the credit, someone else here recognised it when you first posted and I only remembered it then.

I read a few of his when I was a teenager, too – The Open Window (crumbs, in the Reader’s Digest Young People’s Annual 1966, would you believe), Tobermory, and Gabriel-Ernest. Possibly some others, but I don’t recall their names now.

SredniVashtar
SredniVashtar
7 years ago

The Open Window’s a favourite of mine. Well jealous you got to be a teenager in the swinging sixties by the way.

kittehserf
7 years ago

Sadly I didn’t! The book belonged to my brother or sister, who’re much older than me. I was a teenager in the late 70s and early 80s – cringe! 😛

LBT
LBT
7 years ago

Ah, sorry about that SredniVashtar. Just run into too many folks who use it the way OP did.

pecunium
7 years ago

I suspect I was the one to recognise H.H. Munro.

lana
lana
7 years ago

I guess I’m not a feminist. ‘Im not overweight ,I have no tattoos, I have hair halfway down my back (need a cut ) I used to be “promiscuous ” not anymore and not for a long time.

But er…um ..I cuss. Including I’m repulsed by fucking evil misogynist whining about their dicks not getting wet .

Does that count?

Should I get a tattoo ?

ceebarks
ceebarks
7 years ago

feminism is the dawning realization that women and men canand do have wildly varying tastes, ambitions, talents, and ideals, and that being an asshole about it creates nothing but mass dysfunction in the long run.

I know people who insist feminists are a dogmatic and arrogant bunch set on re-engineering society to suit their own images, but ye lords, anti-feminists leave them in the dust on that front, ime. “THIS is how you should be a man/woman; exactly like this, and if it isn’t working, (…however it is that one defines “working”) then you clearly aren’t doing it hard enough.”

brrr!

And, you ask yourself, ‘what the hell; who died and made any of those eejits god?’

Robert
Robert
7 years ago

Sredni, I used to run a D&D campaign (eight years) and at one point introduced a cult of Sredni Vashtar worshippers. They were some scary folks – thanks for reminding me of that.

Note: the cultists were scary. The players were an entirely different kind of scary.

Bina
Bina
7 years ago

‘Feminism is a woman furious over ‘rape culture’ and who masturbates while fantasizing being beaten and raped.’

I love this and agree with it totally. Dude was actually accidentally pretty right-on with that one.

You wish. And so does he. But surprise! You’re both full of shit.

Bina
Bina
7 years ago

(At least where THIS woman is concerned. Rape fantasies do nothing for me.)

kittehserf
7 years ago

Bina, please read further for what Sredni was talking about. Zie is not a troll.

lana
lana
7 years ago

What is zie?

Unimaginative
Unimaginative
7 years ago

Zie is a gender-neutral pronoun, used instead of him, her, it, or they. Zie or zer instead of s/he and her/his. I’ve also seen it with X instead of Z. I’ll admit that I’m not entirely comfortable using it, because it’s too close to made-up words from really bad fantasy novels from my youth that I may or may not have written. It’s getting more familiar, though.

kittehserf
7 years ago

I feel much the same about it, Unimaginative. I use it when I don’t know someone’s preferred pronouns, or if they’ve said they prefer it, as Argenti does, f’rinst.