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creepy men who should not ever be with women ever misogyny PUA sexual exploitation

A creepy expat in Southeast Asia explains why money = tits and how this makes exploiting poor women for sex ok

The sexiest man alive?
The sexiest man alive?

Over on Random Xpat Rantings the terrible excuse for a human being who calls himself Xplat sets forth an intriguing proposition: for men in search of sexy times, having money is the equivalent of a woman having tits.

In other words, it’s not absolutely necessary for a man to have big bucks to garner the attention of the opposite sex, just as it’s not absolutely necessary for a woman to have something in the tit department in order to garner the attention of men, but it helps. A lot.

Oh, by the way, the title of the post in which he sets forth this theory is “ALL women are inherently gold diggers down to their pussy juice.”

Let’s let him explain, in his own icky way:

Women know their value. They know they can trade their value for their benefit. In [South-East Asia] this is not a dirty little secret. It’s not even an open secret. It’s just a fact of life. Money is part of the equation, blatantly and openly. …

Money-and-power-and-social-status is exactly equal to breasts. It can be a cause of sexual attraction in and of itself, and can maintain a relationship when there is nothing else being offered.

Yeah, I’m pretty sure when someone is literally interested in nothing about you except your money, you’re not actually in a “relationship” with that person.

Women aren’t men with vaginas. Their sexual attraction triggers are different. It’s not just that they fuck for food. Not JUST a matter of pragmatic sales of a service. Actual attraction is ALSO involved.

I like big bucks and I cannot lie?

Now, of course Xsplat here is challenging the common PUA gospel that men shouldn’t rely on money to win over their “targets” but rather on being cool and caddish and, you know, going to places where there’s a good chance a lot of the women will be pretty drunk.

Manospherians hampsterbate about this with a zillion “ya buts”. Ya, but you don’t NEED money. Yup, and girls don’t NEED tits.

Having tits is better and more attractive anyway, and girls with tits can get more and better quality men.

Having money is better in exactly the same way. You don’t see many flat chested Penthouse centerfolds, nor are there many broke romance novel heros.

Well, I don’t know much about romance novels, but from what I hear there’s a shitload of slash fiction about two dudes named Sam and Dean who basically live out of their car.

It’s not the case that SOME girls are gold diggers.

It’s just a matter of all the gold diggers mining for gold in different ways.

And of course all of this turns out to be a justification for Xplat’s own use of his relative wealth, as a western expat living in Southeast Asia, to exploit impoverished women for sex.

For me sex is about ecstatic intimacy. Money helps to get more intimacy with a greater percentage of girls, and higher quality girls. I choose to allow egoic esteem to include finances. Money is not cheating. Money helps to skin the cat. Money is not separate from my fantastic ethereal self. Money is part of what I am; part and parcel of what I am to a woman.

That’s got to be one of the creepiest and most delusional excuses for sexual exploitation I think I’ve ever run across in the three years of doing this blog.

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LBT
LBT
10 years ago

RE: cloudiah

I haven’t been doxxed, not that I’ve heard. (And also, not that I’m in a position to really lose much if I did.)

RE: CassandraSays

Also, is he following Cliff around with this kill-yourself campaign of his?

I’m not sure. Cliff has announced their intention of never discussing Maymay again, but I don’t know that the dude is following.

But he already is shit at boundaries.

Ally S
10 years ago

I don’t think I’ve been doxxed, and I can’t imagine why I’d ever be doxxed, but holy shit that thought terrifies me.

LBT
LBT
10 years ago

RE: CassandraSays

Yuuuuup, pretty much. Sure, I’d like a space where my kinks didn’t bring the instantaneous response of, “I find that uber-squicky, yech,” but I’ve already experienced sexual violence on a vanilla level. I’d like to have at least ONE area of intimacy not be tainted with abuse!

And frankly, everything I’ve heard about the local scene is they talk big about safe, sane, and consensual, and are filled with abusers who try to find the gray areas so they can hurt people. If I want to get raped, I’ll just stay in the vanilla world, thanks. At least it’ll be nothing new.

cloudiah
10 years ago

I’m pretty sure it’s just one of those internet tough guys. I don’t think he’s actually doxxing anyone.

Ally S
10 years ago

[Content note: insensitive asshole trivializing suicidal ideation]
Check out this, guys: http://days.maybemaimed.com/post/67794886759/i-dont-know-if-youll-read-this-but-again-im-the

That sounds like a threat, but I’m going to reply as if it’s a concern for my well-being.

Think for a moment, in ernest, and realistically, about what would happen if someone whose first and ongoing interactions with me consisted of telling me things like I’m “garbage” committed suicide after I tweeted the two words “kill yourself” back at them. Is it possible that the force of the State would come down on me? I guess it’s possible. Is it likely? I don’t think so.

Also, how likely do you really think it is that a tweet in such a situation could be reasonably determined to be the cause of suicide? People don’t just go around killing themselves because someone they’ve engaged first replies that way to the insult they’ve hurled across the Internet. People kill themselves because the totality of the pain they’re experiencing in their lives dramatically outpaces their ability to process and cope with it.

When you try to shame me for saying “kill yourself” in these contexts, one thing you’re doing is imparting unrealistic power to the words of strangers to affect your own life, which is a fundamentally disempowering thing to model for people. You’re also seriously trivializing all the other influences in the circumstances in which real people actually commit suicide.

That’s why it’s a tone argument, Cliff. You should know this. I think you do know this. I just think you’re not really willing to consider the hard radical conclusions that are staring you in the face. And, like, I get that. I mean, those conclusions are scary.

A tone argument. He’s calling an objection to being told to commit suicide A FUCKING TONE ARGUMENT!

May he step on a goddamn catcus.

LBT
LBT
10 years ago

RE: Ally

When I read shit like that, my brain replies with, “It’s turtles all the way down!” It’s a layer of bullshit, supported by bullshit, all phrased with enough buzzwords and jargon to make it look like it SOUNDS sensible, when it’s actually just an enormous column of bullshit with no actual foundation.

Because this guy is arguing that his telling someone with a history of depression to kill themselves is OKAY.

BLACK IS WHITE! UP IS DOWN! WE HAVE ALWAYS BEEN AT WAR WITH OCEANIA!

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
10 years ago

This dude is toxic right down to the bone.

cloudiah
10 years ago

Holy shit, that is a person I hope gets hit by a blast of self-awareness, and soon.

All the LEGOs.

Unimaginative
Unimaginative
10 years ago

When you try to shame me for saying “kill yourself”

There are some things that you SHOULD be ashamed of. That’s one of them. Holy fuck.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
10 years ago

Just read another post where he wants to blow up the world because it’s failed to provide him with enough porn that’s specifically tailored to his preferences. LOL.

LBT
LBT
10 years ago

I remember being perplexed years ago why, if he had such low opinions of the BDSM subculture, he continued BEING THERE. I have yet to meet a subculture so desperately dear to my identity that I can’t stand to leave.

Also, I deal with lack of porn by making my own. Complaining about a lack of porn is… a thing? I guess? I don’t really get it.

LBT
LBT
10 years ago

I ask of you, cloudiah, if you can’t be ashamed of telling someone (with a history of depression!) to kill themselves, what CAN you be ashamed of?

Seriously, clutch pearls harder!

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
10 years ago

Cloudiah — I had some dweeb tweet me by my legal first name, but it isn’t impossible to find if you’re any good. Except ages ago I sent pecunium on the task of finding everything he could about me — with my full legal name and plenty of info to work from. He found my resume.

I’m just quaking in my boots that some MRA loser thinks tweeting me by my legal (and obscenely common) first name is going to do more than make me laugh.

Seems more a pitiful attempt to scare us than anything else (and this was like two days after FemBorg launched so I was kinda an easy target)

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
10 years ago

Today in shit that never happened…

http://maybemaimed.com/2011/09/02/raging-chrysalis-the-end-of-the-mute-submissive-masculine/

(Dear Diary section starts here)

One day last year, I was invited to a semi-private dinner party following a sexuality conference. There, an older man, well-known in the sexuality communities for the sex toy company he owns, approached me, drink in hand. He was poorly shaven, his mismatched clothing adding to his unkempt appearance. Something in his eyes betrayed the existence of a continual internal monologue that may have never been shared with another person.

cloudiah
10 years ago

I occasionally get very mad at trolls here, and I think (I hope) that my worst wish for them has been that I hope they become self aware — i.e. that I hope they become better human beings.

I was pretty sure no one had been doxxed, but it’s good to hear that is the case.

cloudiah
10 years ago

@CassandraSays, That’s fucking weird thathappened.txt

LBT
LBT
10 years ago

I’ve never had anyone doxx me. Honestly, what could they do with it, really? I’m already legally bonkers, so it’s not like anyone in the government cares. My friends know. My family’s gone. My fanbase wouldn’t care. My legal information is freakin’ outdated and my location is constantly changing.

I think I may have actually become too big a bum to dox.

And more and more, I feel very glad that I have a few nice kinky friends and a sweet kinky hubby, and that I actually feel safe and not afraid in their company. JEEZUS.

HeatherN
10 years ago

For me sex is about ecstatic intimacy.

Something tells me he doesn’t understand the concept of intimacy.

Seranvali
Seranvali
10 years ago

LBT said:

” (An acquaintance is getting really gruesomely bullied online by someone else, at a level that actually makes the trolls HERE look civil. It’s… really awful, and I want to be helpful, but there’s not much more I can do at this point, plus my husband feels pretty shitty and just ugh all around.)”

I don’t want to interfere but I would suggest having a little chat with Anonymous. I believe they have an anti-bullying campaign at the moment and since they’ve been very helpful to me when I was being trolled about about my cancer, they might find a way of helping your friend.

Ally S
10 years ago

There are three possible outcomes if I am doxxed:

1) I’ll be outed to my dad
2) Some asshole will come to my doorstep and my dad will either physically assault hir or kill hir
3) Everyone in this fucking house will be in danger, especially me and my little sisters

Most likely it’ll be all three. Fucking human rights movement right there.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
10 years ago

Well I just went digging in maymay’s site and for someone claiming to be an expert web developer…well, let’s just say my first thought on loading his page from that first link was “why in hell is he doing font replacement like that? Tell me those aren’t images?!”

They aren’t, but @font-face is basically a standard now (older IE can default to arial for all I care). And his resume is a blatant abuse of text-shadow.

In short, his web design skills need to review functionality and modern standards.

Seriously, if you’re going to claim to be an expert, my first thought on loading your blog should not be playing spot that error. (Versus komodomedia.com which you should all go play with, the add foliage JS is fun)

cloudiah
10 years ago

@Seranvali, You were trolled about your cancer? That makes me cry. Hugs if you want them, and sorry that some people can be so terrible.

Seranvali
Seranvali
10 years ago

Cloudiah:

TW!!!!

Thanks Cloudiah, internet hugs are always welcome. I think I’m OK now (diagnosed three years ago) but the trolls gave me hell. If it wasn’t “you’re just lying to get attention” it was “I hope you die slowly and painfully” . I responded very badly to Meller’s little joke about feminists dying of cancer as punishment for being feminist. I was just out of surgery when I read that. I don’t really know who they were but having slapped Meller publicly I probably shouldn’t have been surprised. Eventually, I got shot of them and went to Anonymous and they helped. The trolls would go silent for a few months and then come back and I’d ask for help again. They were pretty cool.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
10 years ago

What is it with pets and shoes? My father was all cranky to find his slipper in the middle of the kitchen (he stores them by the door in there) with the kitty’s favorite toy placed atop it. I’m like “I think it’ say peace offering” (he Does. Not. Like. Her.)

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