Over on Random Xpat Rantings the terrible excuse for a human being who calls himself Xplat sets forth an intriguing proposition: for men in search of sexy times, having money is the equivalent of a woman having tits.
In other words, it’s not absolutely necessary for a man to have big bucks to garner the attention of the opposite sex, just as it’s not absolutely necessary for a woman to have something in the tit department in order to garner the attention of men, but it helps. A lot.
Oh, by the way, the title of the post in which he sets forth this theory is “ALL women are inherently gold diggers down to their pussy juice.”
Let’s let him explain, in his own icky way:
Women know their value. They know they can trade their value for their benefit. In [South-East Asia] this is not a dirty little secret. It’s not even an open secret. It’s just a fact of life. Money is part of the equation, blatantly and openly. …
Money-and-power-and-social-status is exactly equal to breasts. It can be a cause of sexual attraction in and of itself, and can maintain a relationship when there is nothing else being offered.
Yeah, I’m pretty sure when someone is literally interested in nothing about you except your money, you’re not actually in a “relationship” with that person.
Women aren’t men with vaginas. Their sexual attraction triggers are different. It’s not just that they fuck for food. Not JUST a matter of pragmatic sales of a service. Actual attraction is ALSO involved.
I like big bucks and I cannot lie?
Now, of course Xsplat here is challenging the common PUA gospel that men shouldn’t rely on money to win over their “targets” but rather on being cool and caddish and, you know, going to places where there’s a good chance a lot of the women will be pretty drunk.
Manospherians hampsterbate about this with a zillion “ya buts”. Ya, but you don’t NEED money. Yup, and girls don’t NEED tits.
Having tits is better and more attractive anyway, and girls with tits can get more and better quality men.
Having money is better in exactly the same way. You don’t see many flat chested Penthouse centerfolds, nor are there many broke romance novel heros.
Well, I don’t know much about romance novels, but from what I hear there’s a shitload of slash fiction about two dudes named Sam and Dean who basically live out of their car.
It’s not the case that SOME girls are gold diggers.
It’s just a matter of all the gold diggers mining for gold in different ways.
And of course all of this turns out to be a justification for Xplat’s own use of his relative wealth, as a western expat living in Southeast Asia, to exploit impoverished women for sex.
For me sex is about ecstatic intimacy. Money helps to get more intimacy with a greater percentage of girls, and higher quality girls. I choose to allow egoic esteem to include finances. Money is not cheating. Money helps to skin the cat. Money is not separate from my fantastic ethereal self. Money is part of what I am; part and parcel of what I am to a woman.
That’s got to be one of the creepiest and most delusional excuses for sexual exploitation I think I’ve ever run across in the three years of doing this blog.
Thankfully it seems that my siblings are distancing themselves from him.
I CAN’T IMAGINE WHY.
@CassandraSays
No, I haven’t reported him. I’m scared of confronting him and his friends. And I don’t think anything will come out of it, anyway. I just want to never have anything to do with him again. I don’t give a shit if he’s okay with me being trans – I’m under no obligation to be accepting of every single self-proclaimed ally.
The tarring and feathering of self-awareness and guilt would be good.
Is there a way to report him anonymously? Even if you took out the threats he shouldn’t be talking about his sex dungeon with students. That’s the kind of thing that should get a teacher fired.
Not that you should feel like you have to – do whatever makes you feel safe.
Dammit, now I’m snarking too.
In such a model, if Bob and Andy have sex, and Andy says, “Yes,” “Sure,” “Okay, fine, whatever,” or even, “Ooh baby, do it to me!” but still wakes up the next morning feeling like he was raped, that means Andy was raped.
No. No, no, no. Just… ugh.
I mean, I feel like I’m raped all the goddamn time. It’s the product of my history. But I am NOT going to say my husband is a rapist just because sometimes my neurochemistry short-circuits. Just because I feel bad doesn’t mean he has done a bad thing TO ME.
Also, anyway, by this logic, as long as someone doesn’t feel bad later, they aren’t raped. Which is also bullshit, since my rape was such a common, weekly occurrence that it didn’t occur to me to feel that bad. It was just a fact of life — oh, it’s Saturday, time to be treated like meat. The horrible effects didn’t start kicking in until I actually had a consensual, happy relationship with my husband.
In other words, this paradigm is really broken, and actually incredibly disempowering to me. I say what rape is, not my emotional reaction afterward.
It’s okay. Last I checked, they’re still alive; they just see me as responsible for their attempted suicide afterward, because I bungled the job so badly. Our friendship had already been on the rocks, but that definitely was the gruesome, bloody end of it.
@ LBT
I keep saying, he’s setting things up so that if a person is able to manipulate their victim effectively enough they can get away with rape (and even make the victim apologize for initially calling it that).
LBT – I’m so sorry. 🙁 That sucks.
And of course he’ll want to turn it around, won’t he – if someone can be persuaded afterward that they weren’t raped, then they weren’t, which is really what rapist shit are about, isn’t it? Or at least, leaving people in the situation of not knowing, or not feeling able to do anything about it. It also goes to the idea that if someone didn’t know it was happening … then it didn’t happen, or at least, how could it be so bad and what are you complaining about?
This specimen gives weasel-words a bad name.
Ninjaed pithily by Cassandra!
kittehs – One of the most STUPIDEST arguments regarding rape apologia was that rape wasn’t the crime of disregarding a person’s body anatomy and ignoring consent, but that only “violating a person’s stated non-consent” was rape and everything else is a lesser offense than rape. In other words, if you didn’t say no, then you shouldn’t be claiming that it was rape, ’cause how was it rape if you didn’t (or couldn’t) say no, amirite????
EW.
And more snarking!
Submissives need dominants like lesbians need men. Think about it.
…I did. And I’m embarrassed, because it makes NO GODDAMN SENSE. Lesbians don’t need men sexually because they’re generally not attracted to them. This doesn’t hold true for subs and doms.
Also, though we’ve been giving asshole doms shit, I still refuse to believe that all doms are rapists, that being a dom NECESSITATES being a rapist. I get it, yellow journalism sells papers, but NO.
My hubby is a switch, but he definitely doms me, and he has never once raped me. Because he can dominate me without coercing or hurting me. This shouldn’t be that radical a thing.
That part just sounds like I DON’T NEED YOU (sobs into pint of ice cream).
Charitable interpretation – subs don’t need an actual dom who identifies that way, because lots of people have enough of an interest in kink that it shouldn’t be too hard to find a partner who’s willing to do some dommy stuff without actually being into the scene.
Less charitable interpretation – I DON’T NEED YOU and also if I talk about lesbians it’ll make this sound more legit, right?
RE: auggziliary
Last I checked. They were actually my most devout troll, a few years back. (Which is funny, since we used to be so close, they were originally going to officiate my wedding.) But then they started going off the rails, and I left my parents which INFURIATED them, and… well, horrible things happened and thank god, they are now far away from me.
Also, I can’t take that stupid tumblr, it’s just full of that asshole telling people to kill themselves because they don’t understand his super-special awesome victimhood. It freaking reminds me of this webcomic strip I did, and that’s supposed to be about self-hate!
LBT – that guy needs a bicycle wrapped around his head, I swear. Not content with abusing humans, now he’s abusing comparisons.
Alice – and isn’t that the whole thing that led to “only Yes means Yes”?
I know it’s all entirely personal and everyone’s tastes differ, but this whole conversation reminds me of how I hate the thought of trusting my safety to anyone that way, or being used by someone, or having anything that’s an in-the-mind fantasy actually happening. It’s just a horrific prospect, and I am so glad Louis’s not into anything of the sort.
Hey, let’s play this game some more.
A dom needs maymay like a fish needs a Ferrari.
The BSDM scene needs maymay’s help in figuring out how to do consent like a bakery needs arsenic instead of sugar.
I’m seeing a really cool fish driving a Ferrari now, leaning on the door, very suave.
katz, katz, where are you?
Cliff needs maymay like athlete’s foot.
Maggie needs maymay like she needs an unnecessary root canal.
Humans need m0ym0y like pecunium needs mangoes.
Hey… how exactly does “I made a tool for detecting abusers which is so important you should die if you don’t love it” fit in with “everyone’s a little abusive”?
Maybe it just alerts on everyone with “this person will probably abuse you, but it’s very narrow-minded of you to hold that against them.”
Being cynical again, is he hoping to make money out of this tool? Because if so I guess you should die for not helping him to pay his rent.
Heavens, no, they aren’t hoping to make money out of this tool! That would be capitalism.
They just want you to give them money for existing. (That’s communism, right?)