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Laura Grace Robins: Women want the vote like they want designer purses. But they don’t need it.

The feminist utopia?
The feminist utopia?

What do women want? According to one of our favorite female feminism-haters, Laura Grace Robins, it’s sort of a a tossup between the vote and designer purses. But that’s not what women really need — which is a husband. Oh, and milk. Can you remember to get milk?

At least that’s what I think she’s saying. See if you can figure it out from this quote from her post “Remove the Needs.” I have taken the liberty of bolding my favorite bits. Anyway, here’s Ms. Robins’ vision of the modern postfeminist woman:

She may have everything she wants, but not everything she needs. She wants independence, the vote, her own income, etc., but she wants all these things like she wants a designer purse. Underneath it all, it is just for show and what she really needs are the basics; like food, shelter, and a husband. She may have fancy clothes and independence, but it is the needs that nourish. She can deny the needs and focus on wants, but a life purely filled of wants is typically shallow and empty. Feminists have been the advertisers that make us buy into wants instead of our needs. If we know what our needs are then we can walk down the aisle of feminism and not be allured by the glossy packaging of independence and income. I’m not here for the “Starbuck Frappuccino”, but for a gallon of milk.

But what if the woman in question is lactose intolerant? IN YOUR FACE, LAURA GRACE!

Also, I’m wondering what exactly a “Starbuck Frappuccino” is. I would love to have a Frappuccino with Starbuck. Either one, actually.

Starbucks
Starbucks

Ms. Robins concludes:

Now most women live hollow lives filled with closets full of shoes and purses, while homes are empty of husbands and children.

I think that, like a lot of the people I write about on this blog, Laura Grace Robins has confused reality with Sex and the City.

The show ended nearly a decade ago! At least get a current TV show to confuse reality with!

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Alice Sanguinaria
8 years ago

lurkerina – It’s really hard for me to find a good fitting swimsuit. Either the bodice is okay but the boob area sags or it fits the boobs fine but it’s way too tight. I only wear tankinis now (I’m not interested in getting skin cancer on my belly), but that just makes it more difficult.

I think there is some sort of mystical middle — and it’s so mystical that almost no one fits.

Noadi
8 years ago

There are a lot of good corset makers out there. Marvelous Mayhem is fantastic (I may be biased because I’ve met the guy who runs it) but they are all handmade and not cheap. I wish I could remember the name of the business I bought my blue corset from, they had pretty decent quality mass produced corsets and it was only $80. Really good starter corsets.

wordsp1nner
wordsp1nner
8 years ago

Yes, that mystical middle.

For swimsuits, I’ve had good luck with Land’s End. They have lots of tankinis, and you can order the tops by bra size (including into DD+ ranges). They also take a lot of abuse–I killed one with three months of 4-days/week saltwater snorkeling + no washing, and even then it was mostly the clasps and some fading.

cloudiah
8 years ago

Yay for leopard print ornaments on a pink tree. I hope you get a knuckle duster purse as a present! 🙂

wordsp1nner
wordsp1nner
8 years ago

Actually, now that I look, it seems that Land’s End only has bra sizing for the bigger cup sizes, which may not work.

Alice Sanguinaria
8 years ago

wordsp1nner – How expensive are they? I might want them sometime in future, but obviously I’m not rich.

lurkerina
lurkerina
8 years ago

As for most expensive thing ever purchased, I’m freaking out a bit because I just bought a timeshare/vacation membership. It was super expensive. I can afford it, but spending that much money kind of freaks me out. It is still less expensive then most people’s cars. Though probably not as expensive as my education.

Physical object – computer. Macbook pro with retina. Expensive but awesome! The most expensive purse/handbag was the aforementioned $120 laptop bag.

wordsp1nner
wordsp1nner
8 years ago

I would say 80-150 dollars. They are not cheap, but I wait for them to go on sale.

Though they might be replaced by my favorite combo for outdoorsy-type water things–cheap bikini with a tight rash guard on top.

Alice Sanguinaria
8 years ago

wordsp1nner – DAMN. Why are they so expensive?

But since it’s durable and stuff, it’s probably worth the money. *nod*

lurkerina
lurkerina
8 years ago

Ooh – I need to check out Land’s End

Unimaginative
Unimaginative
8 years ago

‘Designated Boob Pockets’ are not the busty person’s friend.

Ayup. I especially hate tops with a designated bra pocket that should be big enough, but for some reason they make it end across the nipple anyway, so half your boobs are sagging below the band. Are they going for that look on purpose? Why would they do that?

I’ve spent a lot on bras over the years, and especially this past couple of years as I’ve shed a lot of weight. I have no idea what my size is. At my biggest, I was an I cup. I’m much smaller now, but the bra that fit me best (but was $200 for ONE BRA) was an M cup (which, although I love it, I did not buy — $200, srsly. For one). My current ones are G (and I got four for $350). All by different manufacturers, who apparently have different alphabets.

I’m very fortunate to be in relatively close proximity to a really good bra store with an expert fitter (by which I mean I can get there at least once per year, and they’ll ship things to me for a charge).

lurkerina
lurkerina
8 years ago

Oh those are indeed pricey. I’ll have to wait until I’ve got some money in the budget, but my bottoms are wearing pretty thin.

wordsp1nner
wordsp1nner
8 years ago

The one set I have left (a pink tankini) has survived several years of random use, including two trips to the tropics and a weekly kayaking class. IMO, it is made of thicker spandex than most.

But the rashguards were like $20 and they make even the cheapest suit supportive enough to be comfortable and modest enough to wear kayaking with my Dad.

lurkerina
lurkerina
8 years ago

Ah yes, unimaginative, the oh so attractive saggy quadriboob look. The reverse of which can be found in too low cut shirts with designated boob pockets and too small bras. I indeed have been there.

Noadi
8 years ago

Hearing all the bra woes makes me glad I’m an A-cup. I have a couple nice bras for when I need to dress up but everyday I just go with a cami under my shirt.

Alice Sanguinaria
8 years ago

Noradi – I’m a B cup, but still. I thought I was an A cup for YEARS, and then one day I realized that they were pretty uncomfortable. A few months later, I lost all of my bras. FREAKING $200 for new bras, but WORTH IT.

Clothes seem to presume you’re a C or a D cup though. GAHHHHH

Unimaginative
Unimaginative
8 years ago

Oh, look, I did an em-dash! It worked this time! It was space-hyphen-hyphen-space between the words for anyone else who has problems with those.

Alice Sanguinaria
8 years ago

Also, a different rant: why do they not sell unisex stuff? Or are they all in the men’s department, and that’s why I can’t find them?

cloudiah
8 years ago

This one’s for Argenti (and anyone else who likes water creatures) — people saving a baby dolphin caught in a plastic bag:

cloudiah
8 years ago

And another:

kittehserf
8 years ago

Lurkerina, yay kitty!

I’m lucky I don’t have to wear anything like business clothes, so I can get away without a bra most of the time. I’m a 36D, more or less, but I go for loose-ish clothes mostly anyway, since I don’t like the look of clothes clinging to a droopy belly.

Noadi
8 years ago

@Alice I don’t come close to filling a B-cup, when I was a little heavier I had a lot of trouble finding 38-As so I tried a 38-B and I don’t come close to filling the cup, lots of empty space.

Noadi
8 years ago

Oh yeah, most clothes certainly do seem to assume you’re a C-cup. Between that and my wide shoulders I’ve given up on women’s dress shirts and buy men’s and tailor in the waist (glad I learned to sew). Most of my shirts are jersey for that reason. Finding stuff that fits my waist to hip ratio is a whole other issue (my hips match my shoulders but I have a small-ish waist)

Bina
Bina
8 years ago

Anecdote time: A lady I used to babysit for when I was in high school told me about a friend of hers whose husband ran the household: he controlled the money, paid the bills, made all the decisions. She kept house, took care of the kids, and cooked and grocery shopped. When she needed clothes, they went shopping together so he could have the final say on the clothes she bought. And then he got very, very sick (I’m thinking a stroke, but I don’t remember for sure) and he was pretty much helpless for a couple of years. She had to learn to do everything. As he recovered, he wanted the control back, but she was liking her sense of accomplishment and independence.

I’m’a go ahead and guess that this did not end well for him. I hope it ended awesomely for her.

wordsp1nner
wordsp1nner
8 years ago

OMG. The cuttlefish movie. You guys have to listen. “Your nose might get pregnant.”

Xen
Xen
8 years ago

Oh gosh, I’m missing a basic part of my life! WHERE’S MUH HUSBAND?

Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

Awww, that little dolphin even said thanks, in dolphin happy dance language.

kittehserf
8 years ago

Does having a husband in Spirit count? I guess it can’t, cos I haven’t bred with him (hurk) and I have to go out and earn those dollars despite the evil unnaturalness of it all.

melody
melody
8 years ago

I have tons of frivolous things. And I get to have them because I keep my other expenses low. Guess purses, Calvin Klein coats, 6 ipods, 4 laptops, and am currently planning to buy myself a ps3.

And my closet is ridiculous. I have so many clothes. But it makes me happy so whatever.

I’d love to see a picture of the pink christmas tree.

Oh, and a gorgeous mcqueen dress:
http://www.alexandermcqueen.com/us/alexandermcqueen/pencil-dress_cod37483680lc.html

Kim
Kim
8 years ago

I killed one with three months of 4-days/week saltwater snorkeling

That sounds like an awesome way to live.

Snork Maiden
8 years ago

“Anecdote time: A lady I used to babysit for when I was in high school told me about a friend of hers whose husband ran the household: he controlled the money, paid the bills, made all the decisions. She kept house, took care of the kids, and cooked and grocery shopped. When she needed clothes, they went shopping together so he could have the final say on the clothes she bought. And then he got very, very sick (I’m thinking a stroke, but I don’t remember for sure) and he was pretty much helpless for a couple of years. She had to learn to do everything. As he recovered, he wanted the control back, but she was liking her sense of accomplishment and independence.”

It sounds like they had good medical insurance, or she would’ve been stuffed. What infuriates me about this rosy tinted idea that women are happiest when reduced to perpetual dependency is that this basically consigns women to be buffeted about by fate. How can anyone think it healthy that for a marriage to work the wife must live as a child? They should make ‘A Doll’s House’ compulsory reading in schools.

Btw, how do you get italics on here? Pressing ‘Ctrl I’ doesn’t work.

Dvärghundspossen
8 years ago

I’m also happy that I don’t need a bra everytime people talk about their bra problems. 🙂 It’s a little project of mine to remake my body into something more masculine-looking, and I’d say it’s going okay… There really are no women’s shirts that fit me, but men’s shirts size small fit me just fine. Maybe one day I’ll be a men’s size medium…

Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

Snork Maiden — <em>like this</em>

Snork Maiden
8 years ago

Thank you

vaiyt
8 years ago

Only men can do this, only women can do that. Holy shit, the world of these people is so BORING.

Galunadi
Galunadi
8 years ago

“Only men can do this, only women can do that. Holy shit, the world of these people is so BORING.”

Yes. Who wants to live in a world in which everyone is alike?

Also, I think Kittehserf mentioned that the whole “a husband” thing is problematic even for heterosexual women who want to get married.

The best relationships I know of (friends, family, etc) are those between people who want to be in relationships with the specific person/people in that relationship
I am married, not because I wanted/needed “a husband, ” but because I wanted to marry the particular person I married

Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

Entirely off topic, but with the wind chill it’s 9°F here. Nine. Degrees.

That’s -13°C~.

Also known as HOLY FUCK IT’S COLD.

jennydevildoll
8 years ago

Shrews are actually pretty cute:

Katelisa
Katelisa
8 years ago

Argh. Bras. I have stupidly large boobs (I can wear one cup as a hat on my stupidly large head), but my mum doesn’t, so I didn’t learn what a properly fitted bra feels like until I was 25. For the last two years I have capitulated, and now I order all my bras from brastop.com due to their size range, prices and return policy (sorry ’bout the sales pitch…). The UK and Poland seem to be the best countries for big bust/small back bras for some reason.

Generally, clothing seems to be made for 170cm/34B-C/no arm muscles women. Only, I know women who look like that, and they still have problems finding clothes that fit.

Galunadi
Galunadi
8 years ago

I think “not you” is the default women’s size (certainly not me)

Galunadi
Galunadi
8 years ago

About the need for the vote, with the far right in the US doing it’s level best to reduce the uterus owners to baby incubators, the right to vote seems like a matter of health at the least

LBT
LBT
8 years ago

RE: bbeaty

I spend a shocking amount of time basically playing music loud and running pantless through my childless house going “Woo!”

I hope to be you in a couple decades!

RE: Unimaginative

Pro-tip for all you young-uns: with very few exceptions, your employer will never care about you enough to make it worth working yourself into the ground for them. Look after yourself and your health, and don’t trade them for your job.

I really wish someone had told us that back when we were younger.

The most expensive thing I’ve ever bought? Top surgery, by a long shot! That fucker cost me $8K, no insurance coverage, all out of pocket, not counting lost wages from recovery time. At the time, that was, like, ten months of survival, right there. I clung to money for YEARS to make that happen, and I consider myself extremely lucky that I was able to do it at all. Even if the anaesthesiologist did threaten to slap me for fainting on the IV. It was a horrible, miserable experience, but now I never, ever have to do it again.

My chest is the most expensive thing I own! *laughs* And it was worth every damn penny. I never have to buy a bra again, my chest doesn’t hurt anymore, and I look FANTASTIC! Plus I got dino-bite scars.

Galunadi
Galunadi
8 years ago

” Even if the anaesthesiologist did threaten to slap me for fainting on the IV.” What a jerk

Sorry the experience was miserable. Glad the results were good

kittehserf
8 years ago

I think “not you” is the default women’s size

THIS

cloudiah
8 years ago

More wisdom on women’s right to vote, courtesy of Reddit:

How did women get the vote, if they weren’t allowed to vote for it? How did they manage to bring about Prohibition, a thing that surely many of the male voters and male politicians didn’t actually want?

Women have always had power behind the scenes, and I suspect most of them like it that way. Overt political power comes with (theoretically) intense public scrutiny and the need to make tough choices for which you will be forever judged. Why would anyone bother with that, if they can find a man to be their shield and scapegoat and the results are largely the same either way?

Yes, ladies, the fact that we don’t have more female politicians is sexism – but not the way you think.

CassandraSays
8 years ago

I just think it’s hilarious that anyone is trying to pass off “certain people shouldn’t be allowed to vote” as a serious political position in 2013. Do they not realize that they’re going to come off as Rip Van Bigot, newly awoken from an era in which people could say stuff like that in public without being side-eyed by pretty much everyone?

Dvärghundspossen
8 years ago

How did women get the vote, if they weren’t allowed to vote for it? How did they manage to bring about Prohibition, a thing that surely many of the male voters and male politicians didn’t actually want?

Women have always had power behind the scenes, and I suspect most of them like it that way. Overt political power comes with (theoretically) intense public scrutiny and the need to make tough choices for which you will be forever judged. Why would anyone bother with that, if they can find a man to be their shield and scapegoat and the results are largely the same either way?

Yes, ladies, the fact that we don’t have more female politicians is sexism – but not the way you think.

It’s like he can’t see that MEN are people, with their own ideas and opinions, but merely convenient puppets for women to use.

Pippin
8 years ago

First time commenter…

Sorry, I know this is not relevant to this post/discussion, but I read this article in the paper today and thought of manboobz (of course).

http://www.orlandosentinel.com/os-men-only-law-firms-20131113,0,1923317.story

Mnemosyne
Mnemosyne
8 years ago

Why do FeMRAs assume that all women will be happy if they’re forced back into stereotypical gender roles? I’m sorry that my raison d’être revolves around something other than being a wife. I guess that’s just one of those superfluous things that modern women want.