What do women want? According to one of our favorite female feminism-haters, Laura Grace Robins, it’s sort of a a tossup between the vote and designer purses. But that’s not what women really need — which is a husband. Oh, and milk. Can you remember to get milk?
At least that’s what I think she’s saying. See if you can figure it out from this quote from her post “Remove the Needs.” I have taken the liberty of bolding my favorite bits. Anyway, here’s Ms. Robins’ vision of the modern postfeminist woman:
She may have everything she wants, but not everything she needs. She wants independence, the vote, her own income, etc., but she wants all these things like she wants a designer purse. Underneath it all, it is just for show and what she really needs are the basics; like food, shelter, and a husband. She may have fancy clothes and independence, but it is the needs that nourish. She can deny the needs and focus on wants, but a life purely filled of wants is typically shallow and empty. Feminists have been the advertisers that make us buy into wants instead of our needs. If we know what our needs are then we can walk down the aisle of feminism and not be allured by the glossy packaging of independence and income. I’m not here for the “Starbuck Frappuccino”, but for a gallon of milk.
But what if the woman in question is lactose intolerant? IN YOUR FACE, LAURA GRACE!
Also, I’m wondering what exactly a “Starbuck Frappuccino” is. I would love to have a Frappuccino with Starbuck. Either one, actually.
Ms. Robins concludes:
Now most women live hollow lives filled with closets full of shoes and purses, while homes are empty of husbands and children.
I think that, like a lot of the people I write about on this blog, Laura Grace Robins has confused reality with Sex and the City.
The show ended nearly a decade ago! At least get a current TV show to confuse reality with!
Well I have no husband and no interest in ever having a partner at all, but at the same time I have about the same amount of interest in designer purses. Brands mean nothing to me and I think paying a ridiculous sum for something because it has Gucci or whatever on it…well…I’ll be honest and say I don’t see the point. I have a 10 quid wallet from Topman, It achieves everything I want out of somewhere to put my money and cards. I hate shoe shopping with a passion because it involves pissing about until you can find the one pair that isn’t actually uncomfortable. I only have shoes to the extent that they are functional (different shoes for different weathers). Obviously I don’t have a life full of shoes and purses or husbands and children so what am I then?
What about gay women?
I think I wouldn’t spend $4,000 on a purse even if I had the money to blow.
My favorite purse right now is a lovely pink and white Guess purse. Which is a more practical brand to buy because it doesn’t break the bank. However, I don’t really like the new bags they have out right now (mostly because gold glitz is not something I go for)..
The only other name brand I buy on the regular is Calvin Klein (I have a cute cape style coat that I love). And I only buy their coats anyway.
And that purse with the “brass knuckles” is awful.
Have literally bought one thing that cost upwards of 2k — my mac. Entirely worth it, that thing is built like a tank!
Most expensive thing I*ve ever bought: The house.
Second most expensive: New sewer for the house.
Third most expensive: The car.
Fourth most expensive: The fence (tall metal fence).
Most expensive purse I’ve ever bought… Um… Probably around 50 Skr/8$.
I kinda dig the McQueen knuckleduster purse, but not for 4k. I’d buy a knockoff, though.
D&G has some neat looking embroidered bags. I always think “Picture it…Sicily, 1928…” when I see them. Then I found out one was called Miss Sicily and about died laughing.
Here it is: http://tomandlorenzo.com/2013/11/christina-hendricks-in-dg-at-the-xbox-one-launch-event.html
Most expensive thing I’ve ever bought for myself: Sewing machine. All the other expensive things are split between me and The Husband Elect (because we both make money, with varied amounts of love). And only the tv was actually more expensive than my trust Viking Daisy.
I have a Husband Elect. I want children. But if having those things meant giving up my independence, right to vote and my right to make my own money, I wouldn’t want them.
$4K was my down payment on a 2012 Toyota Yaris. I carry my stuff around in that, works great! Gets 35 mpg highway too. And, I may have needed a husband, but I somehow managed to raise 4 kids to successful adulthood after mine left, cut off my access to our bank accounts, and didn’t pay child support for years on end. Furthermore, no designer purse (or car) ever gut-punched me in a public place out of the blue (no argument or anything going on).
These days I have lots of male friends, we help each other get jobs and advance our careers. So it wasn’t men in general, it was my ex and his mental crotchetiness. Is there a way to screen for that before marriage? Or did he change along the way? I dunno but people can survive without sex partners. Really.
The most expensive thing I’ve ever bought was…a Nintendo DS, when it first came out in 2004. No regrets. And holy shit that was ages ago! o_O
Besides, anyone who imagines life before feminism in those terms is ignorant of what pre-feminist life was like for most women. Processing raw materials into clothing – mostly women’s work. The “gathering” part of hunter-gatherer societies? Heavily female labor, again. Today you can see Amish women in the fields, helping with harvest. Even into the 19th century in America, with all it’s dainty fantasies about women, women were working and earning money all over the place. They (like slaves) just didn’t get credit for their contribution.
@scarlett, I’m sorry your ex was an abusive asshole. You’re well rid of him.
The most expensive thing I ever bought was a condo, when I was 25, and single. Couldn’t afford furniture, too, but that was okay. I sold it a few years later to go back to school so that I could get a job that I didn’t hate. Didn’t work out very well that way, but I’m much happier these days. (Same field of work, better emotional boundaries. Pro-tip for all you young-uns: with very few exceptions, your employer will never care about you enough to make it worth working yourself into the ground for them. Look after yourself and your health, and don’t trade them for your job.)
The article just sounds green with envy.
I have a friend who actually makes and sells the most beautiful hand bags. She and her wife are doing just fine without a husband or kids. They work, travel and have no time to sit around on the internet telling other people how to live, because their lives are quite full and happy.
Most expensive thing I’ve bought: Also a house. So far, have managed to avoid leaving it on the bus.
Slightly OT but not quite: me and Husband recently visited Stockholm’s museum of history. There’s this skeleton of a stone age person who was buried with hunting equipment. Archeologists used to believe it was a male skeleton for that very reason, until archeology got better at sex determination, and it turned out the skeleton was actually from a middle-aged woman who had given birth to multiple children.
Wonder how common that is…
@Katelisa: All the things on my list were actually stuff me and Husband bought together. I have no idea what the most expensive thing is that I bought for myself only (and since we have a common bank account since many years, it would still be with both our money). Probably hiking boots.
Most expensive thing I’ve ever bought: a very small condo.
2nd most expensive: My car, which I’ve had for 16 years so far and it only has about 80K miles on it.
Most I’ve ever spent on a purse was about $50 (it cost $80, but I waited for a sale). But I’m kind of tempted by this very silly Betsey Johnson purse that has an old-fashioned phone handset for a handle. But it’s pink, and I don’t really like pink.
My favorite thing about that McQueen purse is that it comes with a warning to NOT try to take it on a plane. LOL.
Because airport security will confiscate it for being suspiciously hideous.
Although my favorite of the ugly purses is actually this one. Because punks like pearlescent things with crystal accents, right?
The most expensive thing I’ve ever bought… well, the car and student loans, but I paid for the car through the BoMD (Bank of Mom and Dad). It’s a nice car. I could probably get most of it back if I have to sell it. I just won’t tell them about the weed we found in the glove compartment.
Most expensive toy… my 8 shaft, 24 inch Ashford table loom. So far I love it to pieces, but I have some required gift knitting + nanowrimo and have not been able to use it as much as I like.
This. I think Louis Vuitton’s bags are fucking ugly, with or without his stupid logo all over them. I respect other people’s right to find them visually appealing, or to not give a shit as long as it has a brand on it, but that’s not for me.
My favorite, even more than fugly handbags, is designer-branded jewelry: earrings and necklaces that are just the Chanel logo (for example). Do people actually think those are pretty, or is it just an advertisement of wealth?
They also love designer brands, conspicuous consumption, and spending over $2000 on a fashion accessory.
I think this crowd might prefer this purse.
Hey, the purse with the skull is much cuter than the one covered in huge pearls.
(Granted that this is because I hate big pearls)
I would not be seen dead carrying a bag covered in kitty print, because I’m allergic to public displays of cutesyness.
(Unless the person carrying it is a tween, in which case the print is OK, but what do they need the bag for?)
Actually, if the kitty print were a lot smaller, so it was harder to see that it was kitties, I would consider carrying that bag. If it was like a super-secret kitty print.