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Laura Grace Robins: Women want the vote like they want designer purses. But they don’t need it.

The feminist utopia?
The feminist utopia?

What do women want? According to one of our favorite female feminism-haters, Laura Grace Robins, it’s sort of a a tossup between the vote and designer purses. But that’s not what women really need — which is a husband. Oh, and milk. Can you remember to get milk?

At least that’s what I think she’s saying. See if you can figure it out from this quote from her post “Remove the Needs.” I have taken the liberty of bolding my favorite bits. Anyway, here’s Ms. Robins’ vision of the modern postfeminist woman:

She may have everything she wants, but not everything she needs. She wants independence, the vote, her own income, etc., but she wants all these things like she wants a designer purse. Underneath it all, it is just for show and what she really needs are the basics; like food, shelter, and a husband. She may have fancy clothes and independence, but it is the needs that nourish. She can deny the needs and focus on wants, but a life purely filled of wants is typically shallow and empty. Feminists have been the advertisers that make us buy into wants instead of our needs. If we know what our needs are then we can walk down the aisle of feminism and not be allured by the glossy packaging of independence and income. I’m not here for the “Starbuck Frappuccino”, but for a gallon of milk.

But what if the woman in question is lactose intolerant? IN YOUR FACE, LAURA GRACE!

Also, I’m wondering what exactly a “Starbuck Frappuccino” is. I would love to have a Frappuccino with Starbuck. Either one, actually.

Starbucks
Starbucks

Ms. Robins concludes:

Now most women live hollow lives filled with closets full of shoes and purses, while homes are empty of husbands and children.

I think that, like a lot of the people I write about on this blog, Laura Grace Robins has confused reality with Sex and the City.

The show ended nearly a decade ago! At least get a current TV show to confuse reality with!

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titianblue
titianblue
8 years ago

Yeah, who needs those frivolous things like independence, the vote or their own income. Silly, shallow women.

grumpycatisagirl
8 years ago

Ugh.

Alice Sanguinaria
8 years ago

So wait. Because I’m not hitching up with a man, ever, my life is utterly meaningless?

How restrictive and heteronormative.

CassandraSays
8 years ago

Women are not allowed to have anything that exceeds their subsistence-level needs. Wanting more than that is being greedy.

(I’m still trying to figure out how a husband is a need in the same way food and water are needs. How many days can one live without a husband before one dies of spinsterhood?)

kittehserf
8 years ago

So, women who are not hetero, or who don’t want children, don’t exist. Neither do women who are poor, or who don’t actually like designer this or that and think it’s a huge waste of money.

The idea of a husband for the sake of a husband is skin-crawlingly repellent.

kittehserf
8 years ago

auggz – I bet she goes for the “of course LGBT people can marry, if a man marries a woman and vice versa!” shit that gets spouted.

Andrew Johnston
8 years ago

The show ended nearly a decade ago! At least get a current TV show to confuse reality with!

Maybe they can fixate on Girls. All the conservative culture critics seem to enjoy obsessing over that one.

leftwingfox
8 years ago

Husband and children over income and independence? Abraham Maslow would like a word with you, Laura.

titianblue
titianblue
8 years ago

I’m guessing that in Laura Grace Robin’s ideal world, a husband is a necessity because women don’t have the vote, independence or their own income. And therefore the only way women in her ideal world can have food and water is if they have a husband who provides it.

(Sorry about the gender binary crap inherent in this – blame Laura Grace).

I’ll take independent spinsterhood and cats over a forced marriage of necessity, any day.

Karalora
8 years ago

By her “logic,” men don’t really need voting rights either. Or independence, or income. We should all be happy to be slaves, as long as they feed and shelter us and let us get married.

Alice Sanguinaria
8 years ago

titanblue – I wouldn’t be surprised if the whole thing was a ploy for espouse additional gender essentialism bullshit. Yay, gender essentialism!

stacydianne
stacydianne
8 years ago

Do men need independence, the vote, their own income?

They can survive with just the basics: food, water, shelter.

So I guess men want self-determination the way they want Timberland boots and power tools (which they all want.) Silly shallow men.

I just love people who tell me what I want and need based on the fact that I belong to the category “woman.”

hellkell
hellkell
8 years ago

She’s full of shit, and those are some butt-ugly bags in that pic.

thebewilderness
thebewilderness
8 years ago

How cool is it that half the population, of some countries, are no longer entirely dependent on the other half of the population for survival? Independence is precious beyond measure to those who do not have it, and apparently of little value to those who do.

CassandraSays
8 years ago

If the feminist conspiracy was behind the Great Handbag/Vote Racket we’d at least tempt people with nicer bags.

Lady Mondegreen
8 years ago

Does this self-determination make me look fat?

bbeaty
bbeaty
8 years ago

Not to mention ageist. So, older women who have been widowed and whose children have grown are living shallow lives in empty houses?

Well, a lot of them never had their own income, so I guess they’ve got that going for them.

kittehserf
8 years ago

bbeaty – well, they should be available for free babysitting when son or son-in-law requires his wife’s presence without the children around. That gives some justification to their continued existence post-husband, I guess.

mildlymagnificent
8 years ago

Ermahgerd!! I went there.

When will I ever learn not to click on David’s links, sigh.

Sure she still may pick up dinner at a restaurant and thus its looks like she is creating a home with “food according to his liking”, but I suspect deep down for the husband it just isn’t the same. She did not labor and put love into the meal as he did for his paycheck.

So my poor deprived husband derived no joy or love or contentment from taking his daughters to the markets and helping them choose our family’s fresh food for the week. Nor was he the least bit pleased when they proudly presented the cheese scones they regularly produced for weekend consumption – when he had pulled up the kindy chairs for them to stand on to reach the benches while he supervised, and successfully got them to believe that they controlled the process. So that they were happily and confidently cooking real food with little or no supervision by the time they were ten. And also were happy to play a part in communal family cooking.

And he got a paycheck as well!

I’m not entirely convinced he would have been sooooo much happier if he’d been excluded from these activities if I’d insisted that such activities were wholly mine. Not entirely.

cloudiah
8 years ago

Can we just start sharing links to attractive designer bags? I’m kind of in the market. I found one I liked, because it kind of reminds me of a bowling bag and I’m weird that way — but sadly, I can’t find an image of it online.

Please assuage the unhappiness in my life by sending me designer bags I can purchase, while I sob onto my kitties’ soft, soft fur.

CassandraSays
8 years ago

You know, I have no issue with people who want to live like this. If it makes her happy to play house with her husband, and he likes it that way too, then have at it. It’s the part where they can’t be happy unless everyone else is living exactly the same way that’s the problem.

thebewilderness
thebewilderness
8 years ago

Yep! That is exactly the problem, Cassandra. That they condemn anyone who fails to validate their choices by making exactly the same choices.

kittehserf
8 years ago

She did not labor and put love into the meal as he did for his paycheck.

Dafuq? The guy puts love into his job?

Someone better tell all the men who are indifferent to or actually dislike their jobs that they’re not allowed to be married, let alone have someone cook for them, because UR DOIN IT RONG.

Buttercup Q. Skullpants
Buttercup Q. Skullpants
8 years ago

“Hollow lives filled with closets full of shoes and purses”…..is that like a turducken?

CassandraSays
8 years ago

I’m fond of Bodhi bags, and have this one in this color.

http://i.ebayimg.com/t/NWT-HUGE-BODHI-PURPLE-LEATHER-SHOULDER-BAG-W-DEDICATED-TABLET-COMPARTMENT-/00/s/MTYwMFgxMjAw/z/Fc4AAOxyHQlSGAXr/$%28KGrHqV,!rMFH62G+hQdBSG!%28q4vLQ~~60_35.JPG

And this one in black. It’s my work bag, big enough for a couple of cameras and so on.

http://www.lastcall.com/Bodhi-Eastside-Crossbody-Bag-White/prod5560030/p.prod

kittehserf
8 years ago

“Hollow lives filled with closets full of shoes and purses”…..is that like a turducken?

What worries me is that those closets don’t seem to have any clothes in them. Wandering around nekkid except for shoes and a bag doesn’t appeal to me.

My hollow life is full of rooms full of plastic bags full of knitting yarn.

kittehserf
8 years ago

I use backpacks these days. I don’t want to put all the weight on my left arm, because my left knee’s the dodgy one, and I have my cane on the right, so a bag there is a pest.

bbeaty
bbeaty
8 years ago

@kittehserf

Silly me. Of course. I just need to pull my head out of my designer bag so I can think clearly.

hellkell
hellkell
8 years ago

cloudiah: before I bombard you with links, what’s your price range?

I’m a huge fan of Betsey Johnson bags.

Alice Sanguinaria
8 years ago

kittehs – Ooh, yarn! My closet’s boring; it just has my clothes, two pairs of shoes, a laundry bag, and my suitcase.

Why can’t I have a hollow closet???????????

kittehserf
8 years ago

bbeaty – those designer bags fog our poor ladybrains something terrible.

Alice – my wardrobe’s in urgent need of emptying, though I feel very good for having finaly got rid of four pairs of shoes that were really past mending, the other day. Come the time Mum and I have to move to a smaller house, we are going to have SO MUCH crap to get rid of.

My hollow yarn bags live on and around my hollow walking machine in my hollow bedroom.

Alice Sanguinaria
8 years ago

kittehs – You should see how much stuff is in my closet back at home. SO MUCH STUFF.

I really need to empty mine too.

Incidentally, this is why I like being away from home: my closet looks much emptier.

bbeaty
bbeaty
8 years ago

“At some point (usually around 40) the numbness wears off and women remember their basic needs of home and family.”

I was just about 40 when I my mother died and I was no longer taking care of her. A few years later, my daughter moved to go to college out of state. As much as I love(d) them both I gave a huge sigh of relief and began staying out late and dating and getting busy with the fellas again. Even now that I have been some what re-domesticated by a great guy (who loves to cook but does not love his job, btw) I spend a shocking amount of time basically playing music loud and running pantless through my childless house going “Woo!”

So, there’s that.

gelar
gelar
8 years ago

My hollow closet is filled with whatever pile-of-stuff was moved from the room to the closet.

… And sweaters. I didn’t buy them; they accumulated.

CassandraSays
8 years ago

The wife laboring and putting love in for her paycheck is not an option, obviously.

kittehserf
8 years ago

“At some point (usually around 40) the numbness wears off and women remember their basic needs of home and family.”

Um, no? Home and family aren’t synonyms. If by family she means having children, no, never, it’s not for me, and I’m safely ten years past the forty mark. Also I don’t think I’ve ever been numb, unless you count lying on top of my arm while I’m asleep.

Is she incredibly insecure about her own preferences, or pandering to an audience of men who’re whining about wife-as-property not being the default anymore?

kittehserf
8 years ago

The wife laboring and putting love in for her paycheck is not an option, obviously.

Well, she is, if you read paycheque as meaning “room and lodging in return for being domestic and sexual slave”.

Brooked
Brooked
8 years ago

I tried to figure out how the soulless modern feminist women can her own income, fancy clothes, closets full of shoes and purses, yet lack basics such as food and shelter. Are food and shelter made out of husband?

kittehserf
8 years ago

… $300 for a backpack? 😯 Fuck!

(This is what comes from looking at David Jones’s website, oy.)

Are food and shelter made out of husband?

Yes.

freemage
freemage
8 years ago

Okay, so you folks did a marvelous job of dissecting this already, and I know very little about handbags except that my wife’s tend to break at the strap-bag joint a lot, so I’m just gonna drop off this explanation of a Starbuck Frappuccino (even though those technically aren’t frapps–I’m assuming they’ve got them on order):

http://www.chailife.com/wp-content/uploads/starbuck_starbucks.jpg

KitKat
KitKat
8 years ago

Women aren’t independent — they are either dependant on husbands or fathers or dependent on the government for their ‘make work’ jobs. Women also don’t have to pay any taxes on their paychecks, don’t you guys read Sunshine Mary.

kittehserf
8 years ago

True, KitKat, she explains it all!

bbeaty
bbeaty
8 years ago

@freemage

SQEEEEE

let me know when that order comes in

Buttercup Q. Skullpants
Buttercup Q. Skullpants
8 years ago

Now, kitteh, how can your hollow life echo emptily like it’s supposed to, if it’s all packed full of knitting yarn?

I’m still trying to figure out how a husband is a need in the same way food and water are needs.

There should be signs at the entrance to deserts: 123 MILES TO NEXT HUSBAND. Trust me, you don’t want to break down in the middle of the Mojave with no heteronormative. social validation. AAA won’t be able to reach you in time.

Buttercup Q. Skullpants
Buttercup Q. Skullpants
8 years ago

Why Is my tablet. randomly inserting. periods. in the middle of. sentences.

ignotussomnium
ignotussomnium
8 years ago

I agree that food, water, shelter, clothing, and some kind of social interaction are human needs. But “husband” is not one of those things.

Having jobs in and of itself isn’t even a feminist issue. Many households require multiple sources of income just so they can get those basic needs. It’s bizarre that people harp on about ladies being able to make money like that’s something frivolous.

kittehserf
8 years ago

There should be signs at the entrance to deserts: 123 MILES TO NEXT HUSBAND. Trust me, you don’t want to break down in the middle of the Mojave with no heteronormative. social validation. AAA won’t be able to reach you in time.

::dies::

cloudiah
8 years ago

hellkell, well I just found out that I’m getting a big one-time bonus at work (which might be because they know I’m interviewing elsewhere, I say cynically) so the sky’s the limit! I’m kidding, I know some people spend the same amount on a bag that other people would spend on a new car, and I am not one of those people. So something way under the cost of a new car! XD

cloudiah
8 years ago

I like that purple Bodhi bag. Hm…

KitKat
KitKat
8 years ago

I keep calling to try and get them to stop taking taxes out of my paycheck cause I’m a women and only men pay taxes, so far it is falling on deaf ears. They keep taking the taxes and I have to do absolutely nothing at my job, it is only a ‘make-work’ job. Now it they would only stop with the pesky taxes and tell me where the building is where women get everything for free, I’d be all set.

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