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Dalrock on why men should avoid women who’ve wasted “a lot of courtship” and “used up their most attractive/fertile years.”

Woman with surplus courtship
Woman with surplus courtship

Dalrock, a manosphere traditionalist with a great love of charts and statistics and other accoutrements of SCIENCE, has managed to figure out a way to stretch “don’t be so picky, ladies, or you’ll get old and ugly and no man will ever want you” out to 1500 words.

Here are a few of them:

Men foot the searching costs in the marriage and sexual marketplace (MMP & SMP).  This means bearing most of the risk of rejection and expending the bulk of the resources to facilitate the process of meeting and getting to know one another.

Oh dear. We’re off to a very unpromising start here.

As the ones who bear the costs of courtship, men have a strong incentive to minimize the number of women they court and the overall duration of time spent in the process.  However, as the consumers of courtship, women have an incentive to draw the process out as long as possible and to receive courtship from as many men as possible.

Here’s some surveillance footage of an average American woman being courted by several men.

But now — get this — the ladies are waiting longer to marry!

Just think about what this does to the dude navigating the marriage market hoping to “maximize his Pareto efficiency,” if you know what I mean and I think you do.

He needs to manage risk vs reward.  When courting, there are two fundamental risks.  These are the risk of wasting resources on the wrong women, and the risk of rejection harming the man’s reputation/MMV.

So watch out, ladies, because if you wait too long, guys are going to decide you’re not much of a bargain!

For a man who is managing the risks of courtship outlined above, the age of a woman is very important.  The older a woman is, the more likely it is that she is very picky and/or not seriously looking for a husband.

Exactly! Because women never change their mind because they’re, you know, in a different stage of their life or anything.

Older women also are less attractive from a courtship perspective because they have used up more of their most attractive/fertile years, and while their attractiveness for marriage has declined their expectations for courtship have only increased.

This reminds me of that famous joke, you know, where that woman approaches Winston Churchill at a party and says, “Sir, you are drunk.”

And he replies: “And you, Bessie, have used up your most attractive/fertile years. But I shall be sober in the morning, and you will still have used up your most attractive/fertile years.”

That Churchill, what a card!

Consider the 25% of current early thirties White women who still haven’t married;  unless they are terminally unattractive an awful lot of courtship has almost certainly been wasted on them.

Are there really a lot of guys who look back on the women they dated in their twenties and think, “boy, I wasted a lot of courtship on those gals! I mean, I wasted nearly 14 courtship on Jessa alone!” (Also, who knew that the women are always the ones to blame when heterosexual couples in their twenties break up?)

They aren’t just bad bets for courtship today, but (in retrospect) they clearly were bad bets for courtship for the last 15 years. …

Put simply, the extended delay of marriage by women has placed marriage minded men in a dilemma;  older women are (generally speaking) known bad bets for courtship, but half of early twenties women are also poor bets for courtship.

Well, you could always marry a dude.

There are only two logical ways men can respond to women’s extension of courtship.

Wait, really? Please, please, please, let one of the ways be “marry a dude.”

The first logical choice is to recognize that these women are debasing marriage, and decide to “court” for sex and not marriage.

Damn. Anyway, sexual relationships are fine, but you are aware that there are other kinds of relationships — sorry, “courting” — besides sex and marriage, right?

Ok, we still have one more. Marry a dude. Marry a dude. Marry a dude.

But while “courting” for sex is a logical choice, it is not a moral choice, and we still do see men courting for marriage.  For these men, having a fairly low age cutoff makes a great deal of sense.

That’s your, er, “solution?” Marry a teenager? Or a woman at most in her early twenties?

As Dalrock knows, but doesn’t want to believe, those who marry when they’re very young are much more likely to divorce than those who marry when they’re older. For evidence, see this chart, which I found elsewhere on Dalrock’s own blog:

fig_19_series_23_no_22_p_27

But hope springs eternal for modern misogynistic manospherian marriage market minded men (MMMMMMM).

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Bina
10 years ago

Most entertaining spam I’ve seen so far!

LBT
LBT
10 years ago

…the hell did I just read?

Fibinachi
10 years ago

That’s the greatest thing I have read in weeks.

Thank you, for this gift, All Mighty Bazular residing within his temple.

sparky
sparky
10 years ago

That is the best e-mail address I’ve ever seen.

Alice Sanguinaria
10 years ago

LOL this is hilarious.

grumpycatisagirl
grumpycatisagirl
10 years ago

Right up there with “Let me repeat that for you in care you missed it: DIRECTLY ON THE BEACH.”

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

Safeway now delivers his groceries to him, right there at the temple! And Whole Foods sends over the spellcasting supplies!

marinerachel
marinerachel
10 years ago

Ah, Whole Foods or, as we know it in BC, Whole Paycheque.

pecunium
10 years ago

That was some of the best performance art I’ve seen in ages.

weirwoodtreehugger
10 years ago

Will any of these love spells work on MGTOW? That would be pretty funny.

Scorpio
Scorpio
10 years ago

Well the problem with conventional marriage is monogamy. Cheating is no good so the only answer is to have an open relationship. My partner and I have never married – don’t believe in it. We have been together for 42 years and have had an open relationship for 40 years. We are both bi sexual. We have sexual relations with people independently of each other – I currently have 3 lovers and my wife has one female lover. We occasionally indulge in group sex. We are well known in London for our sex parties and many of our male guests are married men. Many of the women who are involved with us come with their partners. My wife and I are 62 and very much in love with each other. We did not want any children the country is already over populated. The secret to our successful relationship is our sexual versatility.

hellkell
hellkell
10 years ago

That’s nice.

katz
10 years ago

Oh good, everyone, Scorpio has figured out how to do relationships.

LBT (with an open writeathon!)

Wow, Scorpio, it’s like you and your partner discovered ethical nonmonogamy! Gee mister, I ain’t never heard of that before! It’s certainly not what most of my friends do.

Also, monogamy doesn’t necessarily require marriage.

Viscaria
Viscaria
10 years ago

Thank goodness for Scorpio and their wife, who have found the only answer. Very comforting.

weirwoodtreehugger
10 years ago

What’s with all the necros?

LBT (with an open writeathon!)

I know, right? Is it that time again already? (Seriously, the necro trolls always seem to come in waves.)

Unimaginative
Unimaginative
10 years ago

Don’t they? I wonder if it’s because of the long weekend. Or maybe it’s only a long weekend here?

Maybe one day, when Argenti gets bored, zie can see if the necro outbursts correlate with anything, like the full moon or something. Or not. Oooh, look, I can see ripe raspberries in my backyard!

brooked
brooked
10 years ago

This is one of the more random necro troll in a while, the post is about age and courtship, but doesn’t discuss monogamy at all.

We are well known in London for our sex parties and many of our male guests are married men.

I hope that’s not one of the first things you say to strangers in IRL.

The secret to our successful relationship is our sexual versatility.

There is a lot different ways to read this, but who cares.

Fibinachi
10 years ago

Of course the bonus part is I just got to re-read the WIZARD SPAM BOT post again, slightly up above.

I NEVER BELIEVED IN LOVE SPELLS UNTIL I MET THIS WORLD’S TOP SPELL
CASTER. HE IS REALLY POWERFUL AND COULD HELP CAST SPELLS TO BRING BACK
ONE’S GONE,LOST.

HE IS ALWAYS IN HIS TEMPLE

Robert
Robert
10 years ago

I wonder if Scorpio had a wish granted by Allmight Bazular (in his temple). He certainly seems satisfied with his lot, even if he doesn’t live directly on the beach.

Argenti Aertheri
10 years ago

Well, I’m not gonna go find past necro troll outbursts, but I will start keeping track of them. Long weekends and the like would be impossible to track though — I have no way of knowing when it’s a long weekend where they are. Which pretty much leaves weather and astrology, since the topics of the week seem to have no correlation WHATSOEVER to the necro trolls.

It is definitely weird that one year old thread getting necro’ed pretty much means another will be by the end of the next day, if not sooner.

Unimaginative
Unimaginative
10 years ago

I didn’t mean to assign you work, or anything, Argenti. I just thought you might enjoy finding out if there’s a pattern to it.

Viscaria
Viscaria
10 years ago

The problem with Hawaiian pizza is the cooked pineapple. Picking the pineapple off and throwing it at your dinner partner is no good, so the only answer is meat-lover’s pizzas. I go to cool parties that you aren’t cool enough to go to, and we eat meat-lover’s pizzas and make fun of you for eating your stupid miserable Hawaiian pizza.

I hope this has been illuminating for all of you. I will accept thanks in the comments below.

katz
10 years ago

It is definitely weird that one year old thread getting necro’ed pretty much means another will be by the end of the next day, if not sooner.

I think that’s just the troll version of “deaths come in threes.”

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