Dalrock, a manosphere traditionalist with a great love of charts and statistics and other accoutrements of SCIENCE, has managed to figure out a way to stretch “don’t be so picky, ladies, or you’ll get old and ugly and no man will ever want you” out to 1500 words.
Here are a few of them:
Men foot the searching costs in the marriage and sexual marketplace (MMP & SMP). This means bearing most of the risk of rejection and expending the bulk of the resources to facilitate the process of meeting and getting to know one another.
Oh dear. We’re off to a very unpromising start here.
As the ones who bear the costs of courtship, men have a strong incentive to minimize the number of women they court and the overall duration of time spent in the process. However, as the consumers of courtship, women have an incentive to draw the process out as long as possible and to receive courtship from as many men as possible.
Here’s some surveillance footage of an average American woman being courted by several men.
But now — get this — the ladies are waiting longer to marry!
Just think about what this does to the dude navigating the marriage market hoping to “maximize his Pareto efficiency,” if you know what I mean and I think you do.
He needs to manage risk vs reward. When courting, there are two fundamental risks. These are the risk of wasting resources on the wrong women, and the risk of rejection harming the man’s reputation/MMV.
So watch out, ladies, because if you wait too long, guys are going to decide you’re not much of a bargain!
For a man who is managing the risks of courtship outlined above, the age of a woman is very important. The older a woman is, the more likely it is that she is very picky and/or not seriously looking for a husband.
Exactly! Because women never change their mind because they’re, you know, in a different stage of their life or anything.
Older women also are less attractive from a courtship perspective because they have used up more of their most attractive/fertile years, and while their attractiveness for marriage has declined their expectations for courtship have only increased.
This reminds me of that famous joke, you know, where that woman approaches Winston Churchill at a party and says, “Sir, you are drunk.”
And he replies: “And you, Bessie, have used up your most attractive/fertile years. But I shall be sober in the morning, and you will still have used up your most attractive/fertile years.”
That Churchill, what a card!
Consider the 25% of current early thirties White women who still haven’t married; unless they are terminally unattractive an awful lot of courtship has almost certainly been wasted on them.
Are there really a lot of guys who look back on the women they dated in their twenties and think, “boy, I wasted a lot of courtship on those gals! I mean, I wasted nearly 14 courtship on Jessa alone!” (Also, who knew that the women are always the ones to blame when heterosexual couples in their twenties break up?)
They aren’t just bad bets for courtship today, but (in retrospect) they clearly were bad bets for courtship for the last 15 years. …
Put simply, the extended delay of marriage by women has placed marriage minded men in a dilemma; older women are (generally speaking) known bad bets for courtship, but half of early twenties women are also poor bets for courtship.
Well, you could always marry a dude.
There are only two logical ways men can respond to women’s extension of courtship.
Wait, really? Please, please, please, let one of the ways be “marry a dude.”
The first logical choice is to recognize that these women are debasing marriage, and decide to “court” for sex and not marriage.
Damn. Anyway, sexual relationships are fine, but you are aware that there are other kinds of relationships — sorry, “courting” — besides sex and marriage, right?
Ok, we still have one more. Marry a dude. Marry a dude. Marry a dude.
But while “courting” for sex is a logical choice, it is not a moral choice, and we still do see men courting for marriage. For these men, having a fairly low age cutoff makes a great deal of sense.
That’s your, er, “solution?” Marry a teenager? Or a woman at most in her early twenties?
As Dalrock knows, but doesn’t want to believe, those who marry when they’re very young are much more likely to divorce than those who marry when they’re older. For evidence, see this chart, which I found elsewhere on Dalrock’s own blog:
But hope springs eternal for modern misogynistic manospherian marriage market minded men (MMMMMMM).
@ Cassandra’s Kitty
She is not 18. Nobody 18 could be that stupid and brainwashed…
Unless things are actually WORSE in this society.then I’ve imagined in my worst nightmares…
Eeeek!
Neither feminist nor smart. Discuss.
@Michael
That’s because you’re an asshole. You cling to an outdated, sexist, dehumanizing ideal of what a woman should be, and when you learned that women like to have sex, that they like to have fun, that they’re human, and that they want something more from a romantic partner than someone who is vaguely “nice” at them, you blame them for not conforming to your unrealistic fantasy.
You’re not a quality man, you’re a bitter, ignorant jerk.
Mikey: how did I put my chips on the wrong horse and end up a SPINSTER if I’m MARRIED?
DID you KNOW that when you randomly CAPITALIZE words IT makes you look SUPER RIGHT and NOT AT ALL unhinged and ILLITERATE ? It’s TRUE! ARGLEBARGLE! SPINSTER! THE mutha fuckin BEACH!
You’re not qualified to have sex with anyone, Mikey. You’re hardly even qualified to be a human, though I’m pretty sure no other species would have you. Why would anyone want to have sex with someone who hates them? You’re more than unattractive, you’re laughably gross on screen and probably completely repulsive in person – and no, I’m not talking about your looks. You could be incredibly handsome and you’d still be repulsive, with your attitudes.
The joke’s on you, sonny.
What happens if a SPINSTER rents a condo on the beach? SPINSTERCEPTION?
Mikey is mad because no woman wanted to waste her egg on him.
Nobody tell Mikey that women are born with a couple million EGGS. Not just ONE.
To be fair, he does seem to have decided to offer himself up to us as a human cappuccino with extra foam.
Well of course that’s impossible. Women can only earn money by marrying people like Michael.
Since Mikey is both stupid and lazy, I went ahead and googled Susan Walsh’s article on the whole 80/20 thing on her blog “Hooking Up Smart.” She actually says the exact opposite of what Mikey claims she says:
http://www.hookingupsmart.com/2010/09/14/hookinguprealities/sex-and-the-pareto-principle/
Because they’re all supposed to find over-thirty dudes the minute they hit twenty, auggz! You can’t expect MIKEY to waste his precious youth marrying and settling down … that’s just for women. MIKEY’s supposed to be off fucking innumerable women, who presumably then become sluts who’re doomed to be SPINSTERS, because no other decent fellow will want them.
MIKEY’s plan only makes sense in that usual MRA fashion of “all women are required to stay 20-year-old virgins until I choose to fuck them”.
“Are you just here to support whatever women define for you as correct or are you just the Urban Dictionary’s Definition of a Cuckhold? Which is it? ”
Because if you even agree with a woman at any time, not matter what you’re agreeing about, you’re automatically a cuckhold.
“There have been millions of articles written about “if a guy sleeps around he’s a stud but if a women does it she is a slut! and I’m not going over them. I don’t support guys or girls being sluts but women who sleep around ARE SLUTS. ”
Uhh what “studies”? You mean PUAs writing their shitty self-published e-books? Also, sperm and eggs have nothing to do with whether men and women are sluts. If women are going out hooking up they are the ones pursuing, I guess they are the hunters then. Women and men aren’t sperm or eggs.
You want to use Howard Stern as a shining example of why women should marry? That’s laughable, whether he actually stuck his penis inside women while he was married is irrelevant since he objectified them in the most repulsive manner on his radioshow. How does that not make him a schmuck?
Where’s cloudiah? The tale of the 18 year old spinster deserves a place in the Manboobz hall of fame.
@ Shrill Shrieking Spinster AKA kittehserf
“Well, Mikey, if we’re the gatekeepers, then sucks to be you, because you’re not gonna be getting past any gates. We don’t owe you sex”
Actually your wrong. 🙂
Oh, so very wrong. 🙂 Thank you MRM 🙂
And by the way you almost made me throw up all over my keyboard. For a second I imagined the words “my gates” instead of “any gates”. You FOOL.
Women don’t “owe” anyone sex. They “owe” it to themselves, society and the future babies of this world do do the right thing. It’s that simple. When you ignore winners, when you say the nice guy is a creep and the creep is the nice guy, when you fuck 50 losers, become a single mother, or beat the odds and marry an innocent victim at 30 before your looks slide off a cliff, initiate divorce, falsely accuse men of stalking or domestic violence, take half or more of his assets, extort him for child support and alimony, so can you dress up in trendy clothes, buy 100 pairs of shoes, get a bod job and and PRETEND than you’re a “successful independent women”, all your doing is hurting nice guys, stealing from taxpayers, greasing the wheels of the corrupt legal system, ruining children’s lives, rewarding evil and proving women’s equality is a mistake..
“you can’t actually make anyone have sex with you unless you’re planning on being (or already are) a rapist.””
I don’t need to “make” anyone have sex with me. Least of all my girlfriend. Perhaps you missed that part while you were busy seeing what you wanted to see. I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND. And if I / the guys who you are lumping in with me on this forum did not:
[link to escort ad removed –DF]
I would never personally do this. Again – I would never personally do this. However link shuts down your idiotic blathering above. Because of women like you and the degradation of our morals and culture; things have gotten so bad now, Feminism has been so destructive to women, men, children, family and society, there was actually a mathematician who showed that HIRING ESCORTS ON A REGULAR BASIS IS CHEAPER THAN GETTING DIVORCED.
Again. Before you run your mouth – I would never personally do this. But I’m just saying…
Now begone SPINSTER.
Michael,
You’re threatening strange women (one of them a teen) with violence and you think you’re a quality man? You’re just an enraged, jealous, self-deluded, no account misogynist and you aren’t fit to kiss the feet of the people your squawking at.
Some of us are single. Some of us are not. We have different hobbies. We have different backgrounds. We have different genders. We’re different ages and from different places. What we all have in common is that we all find you repellent, dishonest and stupid.
You keep barking doom and gloom and we keep telling you that we’re just fine and your “concerns” are bullshit. No one here would trade places with you for all the houses on the beach.
Oh.. and Dave’s purpose for the site is listed at the very top of the home page. It is to mock misogynists like you and he’s good at it. See, you aren’t the Obi Wan here to enlighten the silly ladyfolk and their confuzzled allies. You’re the entertainment. You’re the butt of the joke and you play your part well.
http://socoolsochicsomode.files.wordpress.com/2013/06/applause.gif
You guys are going to make Mikey cry if you keep this up. There is only so much reality that a poor MRA can take until his fantasy world comes crashing down.
If he does have money, I’m thinking trust-fund baby.
::applauds leatapp::
Robert Ramirez – ooh, you think so? Mikey crying into his keyboard would be fun.
“Also apparently a BMI of 21 is overweight now.”
Well I guess despite my age I don’t have a chance of nabbing myself a super ALPHA like Mikey, might as well get out the wool and start spinning.
I wonder how MIkey plans to hit people via the internet, not least the ones with the odd ocean or continent between them? I’ve heard of knuckle-dragging but that would take really long arms.
People are dropping all sorts of truth bombs in this thread. Myoo also said awesome things.
I think Mikey was attempting a “talk to the hand!”, but of course he got it backwards, because he’s Mikey.