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Dalrock on why men should avoid women who’ve wasted “a lot of courtship” and “used up their most attractive/fertile years.”

Woman with surplus courtship
Woman with surplus courtship

Dalrock, a manosphere traditionalist with a great love of charts and statistics and other accoutrements of SCIENCE, has managed to figure out a way to stretch “don’t be so picky, ladies, or you’ll get old and ugly and no man will ever want you” out to 1500 words.

Here are a few of them:

Men foot the searching costs in the marriage and sexual marketplace (MMP & SMP).  This means bearing most of the risk of rejection and expending the bulk of the resources to facilitate the process of meeting and getting to know one another.

Oh dear. We’re off to a very unpromising start here.

As the ones who bear the costs of courtship, men have a strong incentive to minimize the number of women they court and the overall duration of time spent in the process.  However, as the consumers of courtship, women have an incentive to draw the process out as long as possible and to receive courtship from as many men as possible.

Here’s some surveillance footage of an average American woman being courted by several men.

But now — get this — the ladies are waiting longer to marry!

Just think about what this does to the dude navigating the marriage market hoping to “maximize his Pareto efficiency,” if you know what I mean and I think you do.

He needs to manage risk vs reward.  When courting, there are two fundamental risks.  These are the risk of wasting resources on the wrong women, and the risk of rejection harming the man’s reputation/MMV.

So watch out, ladies, because if you wait too long, guys are going to decide you’re not much of a bargain!

For a man who is managing the risks of courtship outlined above, the age of a woman is very important.  The older a woman is, the more likely it is that she is very picky and/or not seriously looking for a husband.

Exactly! Because women never change their mind because they’re, you know, in a different stage of their life or anything.

Older women also are less attractive from a courtship perspective because they have used up more of their most attractive/fertile years, and while their attractiveness for marriage has declined their expectations for courtship have only increased.

This reminds me of that famous joke, you know, where that woman approaches Winston Churchill at a party and says, “Sir, you are drunk.”

And he replies: “And you, Bessie, have used up your most attractive/fertile years. But I shall be sober in the morning, and you will still have used up your most attractive/fertile years.”

That Churchill, what a card!

Consider the 25% of current early thirties White women who still haven’t married;  unless they are terminally unattractive an awful lot of courtship has almost certainly been wasted on them.

Are there really a lot of guys who look back on the women they dated in their twenties and think, “boy, I wasted a lot of courtship on those gals! I mean, I wasted nearly 14 courtship on Jessa alone!” (Also, who knew that the women are always the ones to blame when heterosexual couples in their twenties break up?)

They aren’t just bad bets for courtship today, but (in retrospect) they clearly were bad bets for courtship for the last 15 years. …

Put simply, the extended delay of marriage by women has placed marriage minded men in a dilemma;  older women are (generally speaking) known bad bets for courtship, but half of early twenties women are also poor bets for courtship.

Well, you could always marry a dude.

There are only two logical ways men can respond to women’s extension of courtship.

Wait, really? Please, please, please, let one of the ways be “marry a dude.”

The first logical choice is to recognize that these women are debasing marriage, and decide to “court” for sex and not marriage.

Damn. Anyway, sexual relationships are fine, but you are aware that there are other kinds of relationships — sorry, “courting” — besides sex and marriage, right?

Ok, we still have one more. Marry a dude. Marry a dude. Marry a dude.

But while “courting” for sex is a logical choice, it is not a moral choice, and we still do see men courting for marriage.  For these men, having a fairly low age cutoff makes a great deal of sense.

That’s your, er, “solution?” Marry a teenager? Or a woman at most in her early twenties?

As Dalrock knows, but doesn’t want to believe, those who marry when they’re very young are much more likely to divorce than those who marry when they’re older. For evidence, see this chart, which I found elsewhere on Dalrock’s own blog:

fig_19_series_23_no_22_p_27

But hope springs eternal for modern misogynistic manospherian marriage market minded men (MMMMMMM).

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cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

I would have said anime forum of the more notably misogynistic variety, but I don’t think the guys who hang out in those would have had much patience with his faux-Victorian linguistic pretensions.

kittehserf
10 years ago

If all modern American women are unworthy of a quality guy like yourself, then not even the genius of Dalrock’s blog can save us.

Can modern Australian women be unworthy of him, too? Please, please, let me join the Unworthy of Mikey club!

leatapp
leatapp
10 years ago

“Your a women”

“butterfly’s”

Fucking priceless. =]

Since Michael thinks that every woman who comes within 10 ft of him is desperate to shag him, I wonder if he thinks the same of men?

Waiter: Would you like to start off with an appetizer?
Michael: Back off you slut! You should have blown me in college when you had the chance!
Waiter: Ah. I’ll just get get you the MRA Special for one then, shall I?*
Michel: I are educated and I live on the beach!
Waiter: Whatever you say, Sir.

*It’s a warm mug to catch his bitter tears.

kittehserf
10 years ago

Meller probably has a collection of the nastier Victorian porn.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

I count as American since I live here, even though I’m British, right?

leatapp
leatapp
10 years ago

Hmmm…double gets. Oops. :/

kittehserf
10 years ago

leatapp, perfect! I present you with one gold-plated internetz with added kittens.

Viscaria
Viscaria
10 years ago

My grandmother got married at 22, because she felt that she was too old to stay single any more. My grandfather was a violent alcoholic who beat his wife and daughters until my dad became strong enough to intimidate him. So it might not be surprising that her advice to me as a child was to get an education and support myself, so that I could choose what kind of life I would live.

eli
eli
10 years ago

Doh, I get it. Mikey misses Penthouse Forum!

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

I should get my Dad to send me a photo of the beach and ocean view from the awesome apartments he and Mum used to live in when they were in Thailand, just to twist the knife. Much better than living on the beach in LA, I can promise you that.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

PS – Mum was 5 years older than Dad, and almost 30 when he married her. He was not her first boyfriend. I guess pissing guys like Mikey off runs in the family, huh?

kittehserf
10 years ago

Definitely genetic! 😀

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

Part of the reason I’m finding Mikey’s attempts to impress us so funny is that my dad is basically the guy he fantasizes about being (except without the angry misogynistic asshole part, because he’s always gotten plenty of attention from women).

Bina
Bina
10 years ago

Mum was 5 years older than Dad, and almost 30 when he married her. He was not her first boyfriend. I guess pissing guys like Mikey off runs in the family, huh?

No wonder he’s friggin’ obsessed with you! Bwahahahahaha!

Falconer
Falconer
10 years ago

Woah, hey, errbody’s over here.

Myoo
Myoo
10 years ago

@Brooked

Then I was told by Kaylene (a young thin super sexy blonde with curves in all the right places (who BTW refused to date me even though we were friends and according to her roommate had sex with almost 30 guys in one semester ) she told me “Michael let me tell you something: not only am I going to have my cake eat it and eat it too. I’m going to have it with ice cream and sprinkles”. All of the girls laughed and smiled in agreement.

Wow, even in his own stories he gets owned. I like this Kaylene.

kittehserf
10 years ago

The complete contradictions, ragefroth, transparency and SPINSTERS are what make me laugh. He’s such a mess of impotent confusion and permanently unfulfilled entitlement. He probably walks out of the supermarket with the wrong stuff because he’s in such a rage at women over thirty daring to stand in the same aisle as him.

These dudebro tears, how sweet they are.

eli
eli
10 years ago

wait, is Mikey obsessed with Cassandra? Do we have a t-fer sockericious deal?

I thought he was obsessed with Brooke and someone else!

kittehserf
10 years ago

Super thin and with curves?

What was she, a contortionist?

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

It’s like even in his fantasies it’s impossible for him to imagine a reality in which women don’t despise him.

kittehserf
10 years ago

I thought Mikey was all hung up on whether cupinesque’s gravatar was photoshopped or not?

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

Mikey seems to be obsessed with cupinisnique. Not that he can be bothered to remember her nym or anything. Huh, wonder why he’s had such bad luck with women.

kittehserf
10 years ago

It’s like even in his fantasies it’s impossible for him to imagine a reality in which women don’t despise him.

Which is probably the closest he’ll ever get to self-awareness.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

How could Kayleigh refuse to date him, even though they were friends and she had sex with other people? Didn’t she realize that she owed him at least a blowjob? See, this is why SPINSTERS are a thing.

mildlymagnificent
10 years ago

Ewww. I just realised something. This clown is much the same age as the partners of both of my daughters. The idea of having someone like this turning up as a potential member of my own family!

As I said. Ewwww. Gakkkk. Urrgggh.

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