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Dalrock on why men should avoid women who’ve wasted “a lot of courtship” and “used up their most attractive/fertile years.”

Woman with surplus courtship
Woman with surplus courtship

Dalrock, a manosphere traditionalist with a great love of charts and statistics and other accoutrements of SCIENCE, has managed to figure out a way to stretch “don’t be so picky, ladies, or you’ll get old and ugly and no man will ever want you” out to 1500 words.

Here are a few of them:

Men foot the searching costs in the marriage and sexual marketplace (MMP & SMP).  This means bearing most of the risk of rejection and expending the bulk of the resources to facilitate the process of meeting and getting to know one another.

Oh dear. We’re off to a very unpromising start here.

As the ones who bear the costs of courtship, men have a strong incentive to minimize the number of women they court and the overall duration of time spent in the process.  However, as the consumers of courtship, women have an incentive to draw the process out as long as possible and to receive courtship from as many men as possible.

Here’s some surveillance footage of an average American woman being courted by several men.

But now — get this — the ladies are waiting longer to marry!

Just think about what this does to the dude navigating the marriage market hoping to “maximize his Pareto efficiency,” if you know what I mean and I think you do.

He needs to manage risk vs reward.  When courting, there are two fundamental risks.  These are the risk of wasting resources on the wrong women, and the risk of rejection harming the man’s reputation/MMV.

So watch out, ladies, because if you wait too long, guys are going to decide you’re not much of a bargain!

For a man who is managing the risks of courtship outlined above, the age of a woman is very important.  The older a woman is, the more likely it is that she is very picky and/or not seriously looking for a husband.

Exactly! Because women never change their mind because they’re, you know, in a different stage of their life or anything.

Older women also are less attractive from a courtship perspective because they have used up more of their most attractive/fertile years, and while their attractiveness for marriage has declined their expectations for courtship have only increased.

This reminds me of that famous joke, you know, where that woman approaches Winston Churchill at a party and says, “Sir, you are drunk.”

And he replies: “And you, Bessie, have used up your most attractive/fertile years. But I shall be sober in the morning, and you will still have used up your most attractive/fertile years.”

That Churchill, what a card!

Consider the 25% of current early thirties White women who still haven’t married;  unless they are terminally unattractive an awful lot of courtship has almost certainly been wasted on them.

Are there really a lot of guys who look back on the women they dated in their twenties and think, “boy, I wasted a lot of courtship on those gals! I mean, I wasted nearly 14 courtship on Jessa alone!” (Also, who knew that the women are always the ones to blame when heterosexual couples in their twenties break up?)

They aren’t just bad bets for courtship today, but (in retrospect) they clearly were bad bets for courtship for the last 15 years. …

Put simply, the extended delay of marriage by women has placed marriage minded men in a dilemma;  older women are (generally speaking) known bad bets for courtship, but half of early twenties women are also poor bets for courtship.

Well, you could always marry a dude.

There are only two logical ways men can respond to women’s extension of courtship.

Wait, really? Please, please, please, let one of the ways be “marry a dude.”

The first logical choice is to recognize that these women are debasing marriage, and decide to “court” for sex and not marriage.

Damn. Anyway, sexual relationships are fine, but you are aware that there are other kinds of relationships — sorry, “courting” — besides sex and marriage, right?

Ok, we still have one more. Marry a dude. Marry a dude. Marry a dude.

But while “courting” for sex is a logical choice, it is not a moral choice, and we still do see men courting for marriage.  For these men, having a fairly low age cutoff makes a great deal of sense.

That’s your, er, “solution?” Marry a teenager? Or a woman at most in her early twenties?

As Dalrock knows, but doesn’t want to believe, those who marry when they’re very young are much more likely to divorce than those who marry when they’re older. For evidence, see this chart, which I found elsewhere on Dalrock’s own blog:

fig_19_series_23_no_22_p_27

But hope springs eternal for modern misogynistic manospherian marriage market minded men (MMMMMMM).

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Argenti Aertheri
10 years ago

Cloudiah — Fort Nathan Hale — http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fort_Nathan_Hale

Down the backside of powder hill I think it is, but it might be behind the fort itself. Like I said, I’m in it for the tide pools.

Regarding her weight — like I said, pecunium is naturally that tiny, and I have to basically survive on chocolate and pasta to hit 19. So certainly some people are just that thin, but trying to be that thin isn’t safe (really, trying to be much thinner than your natural weight isn’t safe, dieting just isn’t healthy) — I’m hoping she’s either made up, or naturally as skinny as Pecunium, trying to be that small makes me shudder and it’s a bit over 1 point less than my natural weight, I can’t imagine it’s healthy if you aren’t just that thin cuz genetics.

As for knowing her exact weight, only meds psych from hell has cared about my weight to that degree (seriously, I’m a 1/2 lb lighter than two weeks ago? And this is a thing I have to answer for?! Idk, I must’ve had a light breakfast? Heavier jeans?)

Idk if she’d still menstruate, I’ve never known someone with a uterus who was naturally as thin as pecunium — people in the 18~19 range seem to from what I know though, idk less than that besides that gymnasts don’t tend to.

Robert
Robert
10 years ago

He wants to post videos here, to prove. . . something? To US?

Michael, if that really is your name, nothing you can post here can possibly undo what you’ve already done. That bed is made, bucko; all that’s left is for you to sleep in it.

Alone.

kittehserf
10 years ago

Robert, please accept this virtual up-vote and a plate of bon-bons. 🙂

sparky
sparky
10 years ago

Now Mikey wants to know how to post videos of some random woman he found on YouTube.

But seriously, Mikey, if you really are who you say you are, with the life you claim to live, why are you so miserable and unhappy?

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

Platforms, huh? Oh, now I get it. Sub in denial.

Bina
10 years ago

107 for 5′ 7″ is ridiculous. That’s a 16.8 BMI. I know BMI generally isn’t the best way to measure health, but goddam, <18.5 is considered underweight. There might be a few who have that naturally, but that's extremely rare.
Actually, I looked up that BMI because I was curious to see what it would look like, and Kate Moss had the exact same height and weight.
I'm sure she's as real as his beach house, but it's still somewhat disturbing.

Oh cute, Mikey’s a Kate Moss fetishist, and he’s built his imaginary miss on her exact lines.

And he dropped doody here again, too. From the airport, he claims. And Mr. Big Spender is now flying coach! Whatsamatter, Mikey, did the RealDoll run you higher than you expected?

This is getting funnier by the minute.

Bina
10 years ago

Also, platforms, Mikey? Are TACKY.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

I’m writing this to you from first class…wait, shit, that lie doesn’t work…I’m in coach! Not sure how that happened, but I am!

Now to youtube to find some random young woman who I can pretend is my girlfriend. Sure she won’t mind if I ask her to confirm her height and weight.

kittehserf
10 years ago

You don’t suppose he’s got a picture of his uncle Monty around, too? (Nah, I don’t think this is Pell, but the random-pic thing brought his esteemed uncle to mind.)

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

It’s so funny how convinced he is that endless repetition of his claims to be rich and have a hot girlfriend will make anyone here take him more seriously and thus fear the SPINSTER PERIL.

Bina
10 years ago

Poor Mikey. All he’s got is his fantasies…and a fistful of Jergens. I bet he whispers “SPINSTERS…SPINSTERS…SPINSTERS…” like a mantra while he’s jerkin’ it, too.

kittehserf
10 years ago

This is the thing – nobody here wants him, so why should we care whether he has $$ and a hot girlfriend or not? Most of us have partners, and I’d say most of us, partnered or not, are better at being happy (even those of us who’ve had hellish stuff to deal with) than he is.

He fails at fantasy, among other things. He’s utterly miserable and ragey, which makes no sense if he has all these wonderful accessories he claims, and means his fantasy isn’t working if he’s pretending he has them. (My money’s on the second, of course.) Not much point in boosting yourself with a fantasy if you only come out of it more ragefrothy than ever.

katz
10 years ago

BTW I’m in first class back to LAX. Check my IP address David Mangina. Oh wait nevermind I’m in coach. Idiots.

…Not even sure what you’re going for here? Are you calling us idiots for potentially thinking you might be in coach? Or are you saying you really ARE in coach and we’re idiots for believing anything you say about yourself? Do you think the front and back of a plane have different IP addresses?

But I’ll tell you that if you want to convince me, at least, that you have an enviable life, “on a plane going to LAX” is not the way to do it.

katz
10 years ago

Also, platforms, Mikey? Are TACKY.

Please let them have clear heels with plastic goldfish swimming around in them.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

Your life would have to be pretty damn miserable for impending arrival at LAX to be a high point.

kittehserf
10 years ago

That, or it was a really crappy flight.

::crosses fingers this does not come true in April::

Bina
10 years ago

Please let them have clear heels with plastic goldfish swimming around in them.

Or better still, piggybank slots. For all that money he’s spending to impress her, y’know.

katz
10 years ago

I think Michael must be one of the foolish grown-ups from The Little Prince. Specifically, this bit:

If you were to say to the grown-ups: “I saw a beautiful house made of rosy brick, with geraniums in the windows and doves on the roof,” they would not be able to get any idea of that house at all. You would have to say to them: “I saw a house that cost $20,000.” Then they would exclaim: “Oh, what a pretty house that is!”

kittehserf
10 years ago

Yikes!

When I hear someone brag about how much a house cost, my thought is that it’s probably the fugliest thing you ever saw, because new houses here just are.

hippodameia8527
hippodameia8527
10 years ago

This asshat is still at it?

grumpycatisagirl
grumpycatisagirl
10 years ago

I just looked up some of the “weekly spinster reports” on the Dalrock blog Michael told us about. Wow.

They’re pretty much what we would all expect. Women being near him in stores are hitting on him if they aren’t wearing wedding rings.

This dude’s a gold mine of mockability.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

After long exposure to the Bay Area real estate market with it’s million dollar “cottages” my response to discussions of house prices in most other places is “wow, what a steal”.

katz
10 years ago

Women being near him in stores are hitting on him if they aren’t wearing wedding rings.

Only if they aren’t wearing wedding rings?

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

Women with wedding rings are just looking to trade up to him and his super sweet rented condo.

grumpycatisagirl
grumpycatisagirl
10 years ago

Yep. Not wearing a wedding ring is a definite sign you are hitting on Michael.

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