Dalrock, a manosphere traditionalist with a great love of charts and statistics and other accoutrements of SCIENCE, has managed to figure out a way to stretch “don’t be so picky, ladies, or you’ll get old and ugly and no man will ever want you” out to 1500 words.
Here are a few of them:
Men foot the searching costs in the marriage and sexual marketplace (MMP & SMP). This means bearing most of the risk of rejection and expending the bulk of the resources to facilitate the process of meeting and getting to know one another.
Oh dear. We’re off to a very unpromising start here.
As the ones who bear the costs of courtship, men have a strong incentive to minimize the number of women they court and the overall duration of time spent in the process. However, as the consumers of courtship, women have an incentive to draw the process out as long as possible and to receive courtship from as many men as possible.
Here’s some surveillance footage of an average American woman being courted by several men.
But now — get this — the ladies are waiting longer to marry!
Just think about what this does to the dude navigating the marriage market hoping to “maximize his Pareto efficiency,” if you know what I mean and I think you do.
He needs to manage risk vs reward. When courting, there are two fundamental risks. These are the risk of wasting resources on the wrong women, and the risk of rejection harming the man’s reputation/MMV.
So watch out, ladies, because if you wait too long, guys are going to decide you’re not much of a bargain!
For a man who is managing the risks of courtship outlined above, the age of a woman is very important. The older a woman is, the more likely it is that she is very picky and/or not seriously looking for a husband.
Exactly! Because women never change their mind because they’re, you know, in a different stage of their life or anything.
Older women also are less attractive from a courtship perspective because they have used up more of their most attractive/fertile years, and while their attractiveness for marriage has declined their expectations for courtship have only increased.
This reminds me of that famous joke, you know, where that woman approaches Winston Churchill at a party and says, “Sir, you are drunk.”
And he replies: “And you, Bessie, have used up your most attractive/fertile years. But I shall be sober in the morning, and you will still have used up your most attractive/fertile years.”
That Churchill, what a card!
Consider the 25% of current early thirties White women who still haven’t married; unless they are terminally unattractive an awful lot of courtship has almost certainly been wasted on them.
Are there really a lot of guys who look back on the women they dated in their twenties and think, “boy, I wasted a lot of courtship on those gals! I mean, I wasted nearly 14 courtship on Jessa alone!” (Also, who knew that the women are always the ones to blame when heterosexual couples in their twenties break up?)
They aren’t just bad bets for courtship today, but (in retrospect) they clearly were bad bets for courtship for the last 15 years. …
Put simply, the extended delay of marriage by women has placed marriage minded men in a dilemma; older women are (generally speaking) known bad bets for courtship, but half of early twenties women are also poor bets for courtship.
Well, you could always marry a dude.
There are only two logical ways men can respond to women’s extension of courtship.
Wait, really? Please, please, please, let one of the ways be “marry a dude.”
The first logical choice is to recognize that these women are debasing marriage, and decide to “court” for sex and not marriage.
Damn. Anyway, sexual relationships are fine, but you are aware that there are other kinds of relationships — sorry, “courting” — besides sex and marriage, right?
Ok, we still have one more. Marry a dude. Marry a dude. Marry a dude.
But while “courting” for sex is a logical choice, it is not a moral choice, and we still do see men courting for marriage. For these men, having a fairly low age cutoff makes a great deal of sense.
That’s your, er, “solution?” Marry a teenager? Or a woman at most in her early twenties?
As Dalrock knows, but doesn’t want to believe, those who marry when they’re very young are much more likely to divorce than those who marry when they’re older. For evidence, see this chart, which I found elsewhere on Dalrock’s own blog:
But hope springs eternal for modern misogynistic manospherian marriage market minded men (MMMMMMM).
My favorite part of Michael’s Wall of Fail is the bit about women delaying marriage. Which means that those women are, at a later age than he considers acceptable (ie over 29), getting married. Which means that men are marrying them (gay marriage still being illegal in most states). Somehow he thinks that this proves that if women wait too long nobody will marry them, because he is a failure at logic as well as life.
I also love how “rejecting good husbands and fathers during your twenties” makes it sound like during a woman’s twenties a bunch of married fathers were trying to get her into bed, and she rejected them, which was a terrible idea because obviously men who’re attempting to cheat on their wives are a real catch.
But you see, fewer women are getting married, and since there are absolutely no other possible explanations for that, our guest has proven that men find women over 30 to be icky and weird. QED
If a woman doesn’t get married it’s definitely not because she doesn’t want to get married, whereas if a man doesn’t get married it’s definitely his choice, yep, there were tons of women begging him for a ring but he just insisted on going his own way. Which is why he’s such a charming ray of positivity and radiates happiness now.
They’re spinsters. Married spinsters.
That doesn’t have to make sense. Michael said it’s so, so it’s obviously the truth. And the word is out, on the Internet!
Wait, wait, wait. Mikey is actually appears to be saying here that “getting the word out” is what’s causing the “growing numbers of never marrieds and SPINSTERS.” Straight from the horses mouth: exposure to MRAs & PUAs make women swear off marriage!
Hey, exposure to PUAs definitely makes women swear off sex, so…
This Ferris wheel is about a 10 minute drive from me. And I can get cake, to either eat or throw from the top of the Ferris wheel, as I wish.
The trolls are so fun when they’re at this stage. And then they devolve into screaming and rape threats and you are left with nothing but bitter regret.
Hey Mickey?
Nobody gives a flying fuck what you think. Men like you aren’t worth marrying; you aren’t worth spitting on.
Hey, y’know we’ll have our very own Manboobz married spinster soon, don’t you? Pecunium! He spins, ergo he’s a spinster, and he’s getting married.
For those of us who are female, and past 30 and even 40, and unmarried, and are happy to Michael I say:
na na nana na
I think pecunium would be a former never married, since never married = man and spinster = woman is the only way that part of Michael’s wall of fail makes any sense.
Relevant to our interests! Found this via the reddit thread for creepy PMs. I want to be friends with this woman.
http://imgur.com/a/NxGqL
So Michael is saying women aren’t getting married past 29, except when they are. Then if they are getting married, it’s to losers.
Sounds like sour grapes to me.
Michael, you were a pompous blowhard and she left you to find someone to be happy with. Go back to your job and mistreat your co-workers some more. May they find greener pastures too.
If I had to share and office with Michael I think I might be forced to beat myself to death with my own stapler.
Cassandra – I want to be friends with her too! She has the WIN.
Kiwi Girl – past 30, past 40 and past 50!
MUAHAHAHAHAHA!
That creepy PMs reddit is a treasure trove of weird and inappropriate behavior. And these guys wonder why they’re single.
http://imgur.com/a/sMNe6
@kitteh, you look simply marvellous, I thought you were quite a bit younger – you have such nice skin. 🙂
I wonder if that will make some MRA brain explode, re that women can actually, you know, be nice to each other. Even us spinsters.
Shit, I complimented the barista on her hair today. I keep forgetting how to be a properly evil married spinster.
Kiwi Girl, thank you!
It’s all in the makeup and photoshopping, really. 😉
Hey, I was nice to a man on the train yesterday, even though I didn’t fancy him. He was nice! We talked about jobs and trains and how the person who designs bus shelters must have been high! He had some really good ideas about staying cool in the heat! (Put your pillow in the freezer before you go to bed, f’rinst.)
And this is the best answer to the whiny “why don’t you just tell men you’re not interested, they won’t bother you if you just communicate clearly” guys.
http://imgur.com/a/ZEfOw
@Cassandra, I don’t know how you’re able to go through that subreddit. The guy in http://imgur.com/a/sMNe6 has such a distorted view of women that he seems to think his rape threat will turn her on.
Sorry, reddit thread, not subreddit. But yeah, there’s no way I could wade through there.
Fuck, that piece of shit should be locked away and banned from using the internet forever.
I guess I just have a really dark sense of humor. With guys like that it’s so obvious that they send that shit out into the world and get nothing but rejection in return that I can’t help but laugh at them. It’s like watching those videos where some dumbass is attempting parkour and ends up running straight into a wall, but in this case the wall is pointing at him and going “ew, you’re gross” afterwards.