Today I feel an irresistible urge to post music videos. Above, an awesome interpretation of a rock classic that is sure to get you PUMPED for the weekend.
Below, enjoy the silky voice of Phil Collins.
And here’s Jim Morrison apparently doing his impersonation of the most insufferable man in the universe.
Ok, ok. Here’s that creepshaming manifesto I promised. Or portions of it, anyway. (Like a lot of things written by MRAs, the whole thing is a lot longer than it needs to be.)
The term ‘Creep’ is used every single day to describe people who have done something creepy. A ‘Creep’ is, according to a dictionary, a detestable person, but not according to society today. Today ‘Creep’ is an everyday word that is plastered all over men’s foreheads whenever they do something women don’t like, there is a thousand ways for me to be creepy as a male that I don’t even recognize until it’s too late, or until someone else decides I’m a ‘Creep’. Here is society’s definition of a ‘Creep’:
A man who shows more attention, platonic, romantic or sexual, to a person then they so desire at that time.
[blah blah blah]
I have a little anecdote here for you all. I had a friend with benefits, a girl I was sleeping with every week or two with no romantic strings attached and it was awesome. I found myself loving this woman, not romantically but as a friend I couldn’t have asked for better. Fast forward a few weeks [blah blah blah] The fact that I wasn’t aware of the boyfriend, that the message I sent wasn’t sexual at all and that I was a close personal friend of [oh just fucking shut up]
‘Creep’ is a term that gets abused all over this society; it gets pasted on a man’s forehead by women and scars them with a disfiguring social mark against their name to everyone who is around to hear them say it. Men, you are not a ‘Creep’ for showing a woman attention, you are not a ‘Creep’ for loving kids, or for showing interest in child things. You are a functioning human being. Any women who labels you a ‘Creep’ has problems, they don’t know how to deal with other peoples desires, they don’t respect men’s desires, they don’t realize that men have needs and have wants that don’t line up with their own. Any women who labels a man a ‘Creep’ without a dammed good reason cares only about her own desires, she believes only she can have flexible wants and differing needs and she can’t understand that you are just as human as they are, and that’s a little bit creepy in my honest opinion.
-J.C
Woah. J.C.? The J.C.?
Sorry, Jesus, I didn’t know it was you.
Honestly, I don’t remember you being this whiny the first time around. But whatev. Good to see you.
Naturally, the fellas in the Men’s Rights subreddit think JC’s Creep-i-festo is pretty creeptastic. One of them even left this rather alarming comment:
Yikes. I would go so far as to say that this comment is a bit creepy,
The “opened a conversation” bit is revealing, too. Hello, wannabe PUA!
(The folks in AgainstMensRights are making fun of the Creep-i-festo and making Jesus jokes too.)
This guy has crafted an entire worldview just to justify dismissing the very possibility that any man could ever be legitimately called a creep by a woman just so he can avoid having to deal with the fact that he might have done something creepy at some point. Wow.
The amount of mental effort that MRAs go through to avoid self reflection is just staggering sometimes.
Are we sure JC isn’t actually Jimmy Carter? He is a bit creepy.
That one was the absolute worst, and was frankly terrifying. I was only 21 or so, and didn’t know what to do. Of course, that’s why guys do that to younger women, because we are less likely to know how to respond. If it happened to me today, my apartment door would come flying open and I’d be screaming an obscenity-laden rant right into his face about what a fucked-up choice he’d made, with my hand on the phone dialing the police as I did it.
Yuck.
It’s not really “shaming” if the behavior in question is out of bounds. And not respecting a person’s boundaries is way out of bounds. But, hey, being called a creep is way worse than being called a racial or gendered slur. Waaay worse.
The real injustice is getting called out on behavior that violates other’s boundaries. How dare those women reject his advances!
Nope, no entitlement here.
I have the sudden urge to print out “Creep” stickers and start “plastering them all over men’s foreheads.”
Someone just shot a TSA agent and “multiple victims” at LAX.
No deaths reported so far.
Also:
To hear him tell it, you’d think the Scarlet Letter was a C…for goodness sake.
And rumors that it was an NSA chief appear to be a hoax.
Plus it would be “Woah, what an arsehole Brad Pitt is, doing all this creepy stuff and betraying his partner and six kids”
I knew a bus driver who would take strippers home at the end of their shift. He found it fascinating when they’d sit there and talk about their clients for the day.
Because they referred to them as “Creeps.”
I’ll keep that in mind! Faceslaps instead of words for all creepers from this point forward! That dude who kept getting all up in my space at the concert I went to a few days ago? He’s lucky I hadn’t read this yet; all I did was give him the scary eyes and a huge, mouthed, “NO!” (This was after he’d been dancing all up on me repeatedly for half the show. I’d move away every time, thinking it was accidental, but eventually I looked over to see, nope, Mr. Dressed-as-a-Pirate is doing that creepy eyebrow thing while staring at me like a creeper.)
(Disclaimer: I will not actually be slapping creepers in the face. I subscribe to the Captain Awkward school of Use Your Words, unless I feel pretty threatened, at which point I may kick you in the shins and run away.)
Woops! “Bus driver” was suppose to be “cab driver.” <.<
Fuck you. Fuck you very much, creep.
This post could not have arrived a better time. Today I am working from “home” which means I spend a couple of hours (after buying an appropriately expensive fancy drink) at my local coffee shop. I had encounters with two repeat creeps:
The first has been asking me for free editorial advice (under the guise of maybe hiring me). Two weeks ago he asked for me to read (“no, common, just do it now, it’s on my computer) a page of his novel and tell him how much I would charge to edit it. I was annoyed, but potential work is potential work. The page he offered me was the man main character musing on how sexually excited cows get when the farmer milks them. I told him $30/page and that seemed the end of that. Today he only wanted my advice on a poem about an old man who entered a monastery because he loved a woman with blue eyes. Yep. You guessed it. My eyes are blue.
Creep number two tends to sit at the next table and face me. Then stare at me. I get it. We’re facing each other. Only so many places to sit. Your eyes gotta go somewhere. I often look up and catch myself starting at someone. And then I look way. I do not keep staring. I do not leave when the person I am string at leaves. I do not follow her to her car.
Got home, read the post and comments and laughed until I cried. Thank you all!
Note: It was 10:30 am. I am 50 (according to the chart going around a Sexual Market Value of nil, although I could get signed letters contesting that). I was wearing baggy jeans, a baggy t-shirt and a flannel shirt. Best of all, my hot water has been out for a week and even I can’t bare to be near me right now. I would love an MRA to tell me how I was “asking” for this attention.
Recently in downtown San Jose I ran into a man who was threatening a woman with rape in public. The police came (someone else called them I guess), I told the officers to talk to the man, and then he went away. He was threatening and extremely misogynistic. But creepy? Nah, that’s going too far! I wouldn’t want to be called a bigot. #devotedtomensrightsactivism
Also, JC (if those are your real initials) this might be the core of your problem:
“Fast forward a few weeks [blah blah blah] The fact that I wasn’t aware of the boyfriend, that the message I sent wasn’t sexual at all and that I was a close personal friend of [oh just fucking shut up]”
1) That is not an anecdote. That is so say a bunch of stuff and telling us nothing. I honestly cannot follow what you are saying except you had sex with this woman and now you are not anymore and that makes you mad.
2) When you “love” someone, you care what they say. You do not hear [blah, blah, blah] when they speak. I suspect either you didn’t really love this woman — even as a friend — or you know full well you were being a creep and don’t want to own it.
3) So if you just want to have sex, no strings attached, why do you care if she has a boyfriend? Doesn’t that guarantee no strings?
Unless you do so when she clearly doesn’t want your attention and you keep ignoring her boundaries on purpose.
Of course not. But if you also condone child sexual abuse and/or are a sex offender yourself, then you bet I’m going to be creeped out by your “love” for children and “child things.”
babsbeaty—the [blah blah blah] is David’s comment, not part of the actual Jesus Christ/Jimmy Carter’s whining about being creepzoned. The story is that JC texted someone who hadn’t even talked to him in weeks and was called a creep by that woman. To read Jesus Christ’s story, he merely texted her once and she called him a creep because she suddenly had a boyfriend, but who knows how it really went down.
Cry me a river, creep. The lack of self-awareness on display is rather stunning.
In other news, I broke two toes this morning. I thought I stubbed my toes on the bed frame, but no, roast beef and none are broken. Dammit.
Oh, fuck. I’m sorry to hear that, hellkell. 🙁
@hellkell
That sucks 🙁 Are you okay?
Ow, ow ow ow. Hope you get well soon, hellkell.
And fuck the guys who pretend “creepy” is code for “ugly” rather than “invasive”.
Ouch, hellkell! Broken toes are painful. (I am very good at stating the obvious.)
Ack, your poor toes! I’m sorry, hope they heal quick! (When I broke my big teo I could walk normally again in just over a week, so don’t worry, you shouldn’t be hobbling for too long)