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The Daily Beast takes on the Men’s Rights movement — and takes down A Voice for Men’s John Hembling

John Hembling, possibly lying about something
John Hembling, possibly lying about something

The bad publicity bonanza for Men’s Rights activists continues — and it couldn’t happen to a worse group of  people.

Yesterday, the Daily Beast published a long-awaited piece on the Men’s Rights movement, and it’s a doozy. If you’re a regular reader of this site, trust me, you’ll want to read the whole thing, like now. The piece, by R. Tod Kelly, is long — some 6000 words — but worth it.

It’s mostly on the money, but with a few notable flaws.

Here’s what it gets right:

1) It captures the pervasive misogyny of the Men’s Rights movement in general, and of A Voice for Men in particular.

2) In an extended section, it profiles AVFM’s John Hembling, and tears apart some of his most blatant lies — including the now legendary box-cutter incident, in which Hembling claims to have stared down a mob of 20-30 feminists brandishing boxcutters.

As Kelly notes:

Vancouver police records show that there was indeed an altercation in September of 2012 between Hembling and others seeking to tear down men’s rights posters. However, according to the police, Hembling was arguing with two or three people, not being accosted by a “mob” of any size. When questioned by the authorities, neither Hembling nor witnesses mentioned seeing any weapons. …

Curiously enough, Hembling actually videotaped the events and had his AV4M Radio partner Karen Straughan post it online. The discussion with the police has been conveniently edited out, but the rest of the video clearly matches police records and not Hembling’s story. There are only a few young men taking down Hembling’s posters, and the video shows them choosing to ignore him except when he engages them in conversation. One of the men is seen using a box cutter to take down the flyers, but at no time does he use it as a weapon, raise his voice, or threaten Hembling in any way.

Kelly found some troubling, er, discrepancies in another story told by Hembling. Kelly writes:

According to Hembling, sometime around 1995 he was on his way home at 2:00 am after working a night shift when he came upon [a sexual] assault in progress. He says he used his steel-toed boots as weapons to chase off the perpetrator. When the victim was too distraught to speak with him, Hembling says he contacted the police, waited until they arrived, and then quietly left without speaking to them. He says they later tracked him down at his home, where he gave a statement.

It’s hard to know whether this event actually occurred or not. There is no record—at least, not in the Vancouver police files—of Hembling being a material witness to a rape, and police blotters from that time period do not show a crime that matches Hembling’s description. However, this does not necessarily mean the event did not occur. Vancouver police did not fully computerize their data until 2002, and it is possible the police never reported the incident. Hembling claims the incident took place at a specific hospital, where he says he worked as a contractor for 18 months. The address he gives, however, is for a different hospital in a completely different part of the city. This raises the curious question of whether Hembling forget the name of the hospital he contracted with for 18 months, or whether he forget what part of the city he worked in for that same period of time. The real truth of the matter is anyone’s guess, because Hembling wouldn’t comment to The Beast on that or any other matter.

In other words: Cool story, bro.

3) Another thing the story gets right: it makes clear just how little the Men’s Rights movement does to actually help men — and how in many ways it can actually be terribly damaging to men who need real help. As Kelly writes,

the movement’s radicals might … do … immediate damage to those who most desperately need the MRM to succeed.

“When we talk about recovery from trauma and abuse, there were two things that helped me,” says Chris Anderson, executive director of the male-victim advocacy group Male Survivor and a sexual abuse survivor himself. “The first was realizing that I’m not alone; the second was hearing that recovery was possible.” Anderson is quick to dissociate himself from the men’s rights movement: “In [the MRM] people get that first message, that they’re not alone. I don’t know that they ever get the second message. And when they don’t get that second message, it turns into an endless feedback loop and eventually they say, ‘Oh my God, all of society is f**ked.’”

Indeed, Kelly writes:

It is telling to note that of the professional male-victim advocacy organizations I spoke with, every single one specifically asked that I not allow readers to think they were in any way related to the MRM.

But there are also some things that I think the article gets wrong.

1) I think it gives Men’s Rights activists way too much credit for their supposed good intentions. While there are some MRAs who do seem to be motivated at least in part by a sincere desire to help men, most of the MRAs I’ve encountered in the 3 years of doing this blog have clearly been motivated primarily by anger and hatred of feminists — and women in general. They don’t really seem to give a shit about doing anything to actually improve the lives of men — and the paucity of their accomplishments reflects this. In its relatively brief lifespan, AVFM has raised many hundreds of thousands of dollars. Has it set up any shelters or hotlines or helplines for men? Not a one.

2) It wildly exaggerates the importance of Hembling to the MRM — especially ironic given that Hembling has been more or less AWOL in recent months, producing only a few short videos and one article for AVFM.

3) It paints a picture of The Spearhead’s WF Price as a Men’s Rights “moderate.” Really? While it’s true that Price is not an AVFM-style hothead given to rants about “fucking your shit up,” his views are anything but moderate. This is a guy who thinks higher education is wasted on women, who blames the epidemic of rape in the armed forces on women, who celebrated one Mothers Day with a vicious transphobic rant, who once used the tragic death of a woman who’d just graduated from college to argue that “after 25, women are just wasting time.” He published posts on why women’s suffrage is a bad idea. Plus, have you met his commenters?

I was, however, kind of amazed to learn that Price is married … and to a feminist. No, really.

4) The article, while solidly researched, contains some small errors and simplifications that will no doubt give MRAs and others the excuse they need to dismiss the whole thing. Kelly refers to Reddit subreddits as Reddit “threads!” He refers to Matt Forney as an MRA! Oh no!

Still, whatever its flaws, this is an important piece, and one that tells a lot of truth about the Men’s Rights movement. Again — go read it!

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dustydeste
dustydeste
11 years ago

Oh shit, I should have put a trigger warning on that. My deepest apologies if anyone got hurt by that.

Brooked
Brooked
11 years ago

@Radical Parrot

Your argument is bad and you should feel bad.

This probably had no effect on the troll, but I laughed.

@Katz: That’s the first Pierre I read hot off the presses while the lunacy it mocks is still running wild. Neat.

@baileyrenee

Various Journalistic Buffooneries: A Jello Biafra side project

If I didn’t know this was joke coming in I’d probably believe that Biafra released a one-off album as Various Journalistic Buffooneries, perhaps in collaboration with Mike Patton.

The Mental Gymnastics: math rock

Graceless Spasms: grindcore

Cooking the Books: jazz rock

A Cute Little Attempt: twee pop

All Tea Scones & Clooted Cream: British Folk Rock

Asshole McGee: cowpunk

Ahostleworld: drone

opheliamonarch
11 years ago

I think this whole thread is triggering, and it’s hard to remember when you have a rape apologist bollocksing on. Not your fault love.

Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

Ophelia — it’s not the thread, my SSI hearing is next Friday. If anything, hostility is a good distraction.

Alice — good to know that I got it right. And non-binary myself, so ze/zir please 🙂

Both — I can do HTML, CSS, some JS and some PHP…none of which are really useful for violating the laws of physics.

ahostileworld
11 years ago

@SittieKittie

You and me have discrepant ideas of what constitutes ‘a fuckload of people’. This is a matter of perception and it cannot be resolved. Either way, I find it inconceivable that a mere 5 percent of an overall population could or should be seen as representative or definitive of an entire culture. And yes, rape is widely condemned, and there are actually laws against rape. You will not find many people who will say, ‘I think rape is hunky-dorey and should be made legal.’

BTW I wasn’t whingeing. So yeah, you wasted three years of your life studying something utterly useless. These things happen. Life is not a magic pony ride on the rainbow. I wasted a lot of my time in my life and got over it.

katz
11 years ago

Glad everyone liked the comic! It’s up on Comicfury now.

opheliamonarch
11 years ago

My last one was to Dustedeste, and also sorry ’bout the bollocks bit, I know, gendered. 🙁

Brooked
Brooked
11 years ago

@LTB

He never did answer my question, did he?

I’m guessing no, but since his posts are the written form of white noise I don’t know what he’s trying and/or succeeding to do here.

Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

Life is not a magic pony ride on the rainbow — MLP themed band

katz
11 years ago

Life is not a magic pony ride on the rainbow.

GODDAMMIT! Are you doing this on purpose?

Brooked
Brooked
11 years ago

@LBT Your handle has THREE letters and I still managed to mangle it. That’s impressive.

gillyrosebee
gillyrosebee
11 years ago

O. M. G. That Pierre is FANTASTIC!!!!!

True enough that

Because the world isn’t all tea scones and clotted cream.

is a thing of beauty (though I am sure that a comma belongs in there somewhere), but there is so much win and awesome in that comic, that any more would be gilding the lily, I think.

chibigodzilla
11 years ago

@katz: Save the new ones up for a second comic?

opheliamonarch
11 years ago

@argenti, sorry ’bout the SSI thing.

I’m registered disabled ’cause of PTSD/OCD so I know how that shit gets to you. 🙁

Join us in planning ‘The Boobinator’ 🙂

pecunium
11 years ago

Hostile to Logic: You and me have discrepant ideas of what constitutes ‘a fuckload of people’. This is a matter of perception and it cannot be resolved. Either way, I find it inconceivable that a mere 5 percent of an overall population could or should be seen as representative or definitive of an entire culture.

Have you been in a cave? Have you seen what gets said about Muslims?

Do you think the radical/violent/terroristic members of Islam come to anything close to 1/2 of .01 of Muslims?

If so, defend the thesis.

If not, well then you have (again) disproven your claim.

pecunium
11 years ago

McGee: You will not find many people who will say, ‘I think rape is hunky-dorey and should be made legal.’

Really?

Recall that your definition of rape = when one party denies/withdraws consent and is not heeded.

There are lots of people who argue that this is a terrible thing. That “implied” consent is good enough. That, “if she’s wearing a short skirt and drinking alcohol; she’s asking for it”.

Those are people, who by your rules, are saying rape should be legal.

pecunium
11 years ago

And I have to go. There is an advisory committee meeting I have to go to on the local subway system.

Tchuss

katz
11 years ago

@katz: Save the new ones up for a second comic?

I might. Would it be going too far if he murdered someone?

chibigodzilla
11 years ago

@katz: Save the new ones up for a second comic?

Or, perhaps just a single panel of Pierre & Poutine riding a magic pony on a rainbow above a world of scones and clotted cream?

Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

Oh, withdrawl of consent isn’t rape in plenty of states, give me a minute to check a couple of things on that.

katz
11 years ago

Or, perhaps just a single panel of Pierre & Poutine riding a magic pony on a rainbow above a world of scones and clotted cream?

…This is way better than my idea.

pecunium
11 years ago

Argenti: Doesn’t matter: we are going with his working definition.

pecunium
11 years ago

and with that i have to run for the train.

ahostileworld
11 years ago

No need. I was asked about what *I* thought was consent, not what some backwater, road-kill-munching state in the mid-west thinks it is.

Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

No signs of it being rape in the UK or Germany. The former requires the defendant to “not reasonably believe that [the victim] consents”.

Going to continue claiming that no one makes excuses for rape?

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