The bad publicity bonanza for Men’s Rights activists continues — and it couldn’t happen to a worse group of people.
Yesterday, the Daily Beast published a long-awaited piece on the Men’s Rights movement, and it’s a doozy. If you’re a regular reader of this site, trust me, you’ll want to read the whole thing, like now. The piece, by R. Tod Kelly, is long — some 6000 words — but worth it.
It’s mostly on the money, but with a few notable flaws.
Here’s what it gets right:
1) It captures the pervasive misogyny of the Men’s Rights movement in general, and of A Voice for Men in particular.
2) In an extended section, it profiles AVFM’s John Hembling, and tears apart some of his most blatant lies — including the now legendary box-cutter incident, in which Hembling claims to have stared down a mob of 20-30 feminists brandishing boxcutters.
As Kelly notes:
Vancouver police records show that there was indeed an altercation in September of 2012 between Hembling and others seeking to tear down men’s rights posters. However, according to the police, Hembling was arguing with two or three people, not being accosted by a “mob” of any size. When questioned by the authorities, neither Hembling nor witnesses mentioned seeing any weapons. …
Curiously enough, Hembling actually videotaped the events and had his AV4M Radio partner Karen Straughan post it online. The discussion with the police has been conveniently edited out, but the rest of the video clearly matches police records and not Hembling’s story. There are only a few young men taking down Hembling’s posters, and the video shows them choosing to ignore him except when he engages them in conversation. One of the men is seen using a box cutter to take down the flyers, but at no time does he use it as a weapon, raise his voice, or threaten Hembling in any way.
Kelly found some troubling, er, discrepancies in another story told by Hembling. Kelly writes:
According to Hembling, sometime around 1995 he was on his way home at 2:00 am after working a night shift when he came upon [a sexual] assault in progress. He says he used his steel-toed boots as weapons to chase off the perpetrator. When the victim was too distraught to speak with him, Hembling says he contacted the police, waited until they arrived, and then quietly left without speaking to them. He says they later tracked him down at his home, where he gave a statement.
It’s hard to know whether this event actually occurred or not. There is no record—at least, not in the Vancouver police files—of Hembling being a material witness to a rape, and police blotters from that time period do not show a crime that matches Hembling’s description. However, this does not necessarily mean the event did not occur. Vancouver police did not fully computerize their data until 2002, and it is possible the police never reported the incident. Hembling claims the incident took place at a specific hospital, where he says he worked as a contractor for 18 months. The address he gives, however, is for a different hospital in a completely different part of the city. This raises the curious question of whether Hembling forget the name of the hospital he contracted with for 18 months, or whether he forget what part of the city he worked in for that same period of time. The real truth of the matter is anyone’s guess, because Hembling wouldn’t comment to The Beast on that or any other matter.
In other words: Cool story, bro.
3) Another thing the story gets right: it makes clear just how little the Men’s Rights movement does to actually help men — and how in many ways it can actually be terribly damaging to men who need real help. As Kelly writes,
the movement’s radicals might … do … immediate damage to those who most desperately need the MRM to succeed.
“When we talk about recovery from trauma and abuse, there were two things that helped me,” says Chris Anderson, executive director of the male-victim advocacy group Male Survivor and a sexual abuse survivor himself. “The first was realizing that I’m not alone; the second was hearing that recovery was possible.” Anderson is quick to dissociate himself from the men’s rights movement: “In [the MRM] people get that first message, that they’re not alone. I don’t know that they ever get the second message. And when they don’t get that second message, it turns into an endless feedback loop and eventually they say, ‘Oh my God, all of society is f**ked.’”
Indeed, Kelly writes:
It is telling to note that of the professional male-victim advocacy organizations I spoke with, every single one specifically asked that I not allow readers to think they were in any way related to the MRM.
But there are also some things that I think the article gets wrong.
1) I think it gives Men’s Rights activists way too much credit for their supposed good intentions. While there are some MRAs who do seem to be motivated at least in part by a sincere desire to help men, most of the MRAs I’ve encountered in the 3 years of doing this blog have clearly been motivated primarily by anger and hatred of feminists — and women in general. They don’t really seem to give a shit about doing anything to actually improve the lives of men — and the paucity of their accomplishments reflects this. In its relatively brief lifespan, AVFM has raised many hundreds of thousands of dollars. Has it set up any shelters or hotlines or helplines for men? Not a one.
2) It wildly exaggerates the importance of Hembling to the MRM — especially ironic given that Hembling has been more or less AWOL in recent months, producing only a few short videos and one article for AVFM.
3) It paints a picture of The Spearhead’s WF Price as a Men’s Rights “moderate.” Really? While it’s true that Price is not an AVFM-style hothead given to rants about “fucking your shit up,” his views are anything but moderate. This is a guy who thinks higher education is wasted on women, who blames the epidemic of rape in the armed forces on women, who celebrated one Mothers Day with a vicious transphobic rant, who once used the tragic death of a woman who’d just graduated from college to argue that “after 25, women are just wasting time.” He published posts on why women’s suffrage is a bad idea. Plus, have you met his commenters?
I was, however, kind of amazed to learn that Price is married … and to a feminist. No, really.
4) The article, while solidly researched, contains some small errors and simplifications that will no doubt give MRAs and others the excuse they need to dismiss the whole thing. Kelly refers to Reddit subreddits as Reddit “threads!” He refers to Matt Forney as an MRA! Oh no!
Still, whatever its flaws, this is an important piece, and one that tells a lot of truth about the Men’s Rights movement. Again — go read it!
Ally – I’m really hoping now that Sunny D isn’t anything like the Sunnyboy orange juice in tetra packs we had as kids. The milkbars never did keep it in the fridge … WARM orange juice, erk. Mixing it with alcohol doesn’t bear thinking about.
Sunny D is like…imagine that Coke made “fresh” non-carbonated fruit juice. In comes in multiple varieties, and they all glow. The blue one is particularly alarming.
😀
Ophelia – exactly what I was copying. That’s one of my favourite Python sketches. We used to have a painful general manager here (less painful than the current one) from the Yorkshire-Lancashire border, and The Four Yorkshiremen got adapted a lot.
Erg, Sunny D sounds as bad as Fanta!
Ugh, Sunny D is the worst. It’s fake orange juice stuff.
@Ophelia – sorry to disappoint you, I’m 24 :/
But if on your travels around that place where you live, you ever heard of a couple named Caroline and Joe (who I think are about your age-ish), I was at their wedding this year.
/long shot
Anyway, it is definitely time for bed for me since I’ve got to the stage of tiredness (the original typo, ‘tiredmess’ might be more accurate) where I have to close one eye to focus on the screen. Oh and I need to be up in 4 hours. *shakes fist at MBZ* stop being so entertaining!
It’s worse than Fanta. Fanta is for teenagers; Sunny D is for little kids instead of actual juice.
Before I go – blue Sunny D?!?!
Sunny D is worse because it pretends to be real fruit juice.
I saw the blue one at Mi Pueblo (Mexican supermarket), still don’t know what flavor that was meant to be.
I looked up the Sunny D website and while they have an alarming 15 different flavours, there was no blue. Maybe it was a limited edition?
Anyways, to bed. G’night MBZ.
Sunny D is horrid.
And I’m going to again taunt the merits of mango juice and vodka. And pecunium is again going to hate the delicious mango.
Doesn’t that come out kind of gloopy? My main objection would be textural.
Mango juice: Better or worse than Sunny D?
@thenotsoveryfantastic! I bloody Knew it!!! 😉
Anyway, Kitteh says I look your age, and I’m gonna ignore the fact that she’s just being nice (’cause she IS lovely) and say she’s right!
*mutters to self* still have to take ID when I go to clubs, don’t bloody care, I’m a whippersnapper, Kitteh says so…
Mango juice – quite possibly made out of actual mangos!
Sunny D – I have no idea WTF that stuff is made of. Mostly sugar or HFCS, presumably.
I actually don’t mind Sunny D – it’s at least tolerable for me. But mixing it with alcohol sounds like a disaster.
Speaking of disasters; I’ve probably mentioned this before, but my first alcoholic drink ever was rum mixed with diet A&W root beer. I’m surprised I still wanted to drink alcohol after that ordeal.
I love gloopy juice but I can’t imagine it would be very good as a mixer. Better in a nice gloopy smoothie.
I’m also picturing the carpets/seat cushions in a bar where people have been spilling their gloopy drinks. Ew.
Ugh, rum and root beer. My best friend insisted that rum and Coke was the best thing ever and I was like “I don’t really like either rum or Coke” but she insisted so I tried it and sure enough, if you don’t like rum or Coke, you won’t like rum and Coke.
Heh, on non-kosher drink mixes… I knew a guy in college who mixed his vodka with Gatorade. You couldn’t actually taste the vodka in it usually. Anyways, this guy was in fencing club with me, and a few times he ended up fencing a bit drunk after mixing up which bottles were spiked and which ones weren’t 😀
Oh fencing club. Good times, good times.
Meanwhile in Australia…
G’night @thenatfantastic.
Growing up, along with thinking if we dug for long enough at the seaside, we’d end up in Oz (Yes, Australia was where Dorothy went!) we also thought everybody had wombats, koalas and kangaroos for pets.
I know this isn’t true now, but it makes me sad. 🙁
You guys! The Sunny D site has a recipe section. They want you to make cheesecake with it.
http://www.sunnyd.com/recipes/index.html