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Intra-vaginal anti-cuckoldry tactics and the psychobiology of semen: An Evo Psych pop quiz

Napping: A terrible anti-cuckoldry tactic
Napping: A terribly ineffective anti-cuckoldry tactic

Today, a little Evo Psych Pop Quiz for you all!

5 of the following 6 statements are actual quotes from a 2007 article in the open access peer-reviewed journal Evolutionary Psychology. Can you spot the quote that isn’t from the article?

  1. “The section on intra-vaginal anti-cuckoldry tactics focuses on sperm competition, providing fascinating descriptions of the semen-displacement hypothesis (Gallup Jr. and Burch) and the psychobiology of semen (Burch and Gallup Jr.).”
  2. “[I]ntra-vaginal battles demand men to become aroused to situations that are actually unpleasant for them, for instance the suspicion of their partner’s infidelity.”
  3. “This section also includes discussions of the interesting notions that … women should not be motivated to have sex with their main partner right after an extra-pair copulation because of the possibility of sperm displacement (the penis appears to be shaped to do just that), [and] that a man may manipulate a woman’s mood via semen content (Rice, 1996, has experimentally shown something similar in fruit flies) … .”
  4.  “One of the mating strategies examined as an early prevention method is violence against women within partnered relationships.”
  5.  “Despite this scrutiny, a man can still gain from deliberately ejaculating in front of his partner from time to time. Choosing each occasion carefully so as to display a good ejaculation can be a powerful way to advertise his continuing good health.”
  6. “Affirmative feedback did not increase men’s likelihood to allocate resources to self-morphed images, but men were significantly less likely to allocate resources to self morphed images when told the morphed image did not resemble them … . “

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Answer: Number 5 is the ringer! But, lacking confidence in my own ability to come up with something as convincingly batty as the quotes from the real article, I cheated a little here, borrowing this quote from a real Evo Psych book — Sperm Wars, by Robin Baker, a popular title from a major publisher recommended on countless Pickup Artist and “Red Pill” reading lists. It’s a truly bizarre and often quite disturbing read. (If you have a bit of Google-fu you should be able to locate a pdf of it online with no trouble.)

And speaking of pdfs, if you want tp read the article in Evo Psych I got most of these quotes from, a book review by Kelly D. Suschinsky and Martin L. Lalumière titled The View From the Cuckold, you can find a pdf of it here. See, I really didn’t just make it up!

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CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

Maybe it’s just because I went to Uni in GodlessHeathenLand (London), but the fact that all my professors a. believed in evolution and b. assumed that when looking at any behavior there would probably be both nature and nurture-type factors at work was just kind of a given.

kittehserf
11 years ago

I didn’t go to uni anywhere, but I’d have assumed the same thing would be a given in such a course.

But we’re heathens here, too. Even at the University of Wolloomooloo. 😉

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

I was so confused to see “the other option is that God did it” (paraphrasing because I’m too lazy to scroll) come up in the comments upthread. Um, how is this relevant to a conversation about psychology?

kittehserf
11 years ago

‘Cos Freud ain’t God?

‘Cos there’s no room on the psychiatrist’s couch ‘cos Ceiling Cat is sleeping there?

cloudiah
11 years ago

Which Pratchett book deals with orcs?

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

Are you sure you want to know? It’s a giant spoiler that might make the book less fun to read.

kittehserf
11 years ago

I like the way Pratchett’s dealt with the whole species thing in the book in question, Thud and Snuff. Mind you I’d have enjoyed the latter two anyway, ‘cos Vimes.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

Thud and Jingo are both awesome in that regard. I just finished re-reading Night Watch so I’ve been on a Vimes kick lately.

cloudiah
11 years ago

Oh, then no. But maybe in a few days, you could suggest a few Pratchett books for me to read. My memory is so bad, I will have forgotten about this conversation by then. XD

cloudiah
11 years ago

Oh I guess I should’ve hit refresh.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

Bad memory or just sleep deprived? You have seemed super busy lately.

Given the recent arguments about religion I would totally recommend Monstrous Regiment, just because of the holy book that has an appendix that God keeps adding to.

cloudiah
11 years ago

I’ve always had a bad memory. But I am sleep-deprived & tense because I’ve been applying for jobs. You get to a point where your CV just looks like gibberish, you know?

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

“I’m a psych drop-out, actually XD”

Me too!

I have no other comment on this mess.

markb
markb
11 years ago

“Or is there a group of people somewhere who think that snot is the most amazing thing ever and has semi-mystical powers?”

The Jatravartid People of Viltvodle Six firmly believe that the entire universe was sneezed out of the nose of a being called The Great Green Arkleseizure. They live in perpetual fear of the time they call The Coming Of The Great White Handkerchief.

(Someone had to quote that).

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

Blocker sperm was brought up by pecunium. And I’m still staying out of this one.

kittehserf
11 years ago

David, do you know what’s happened to the Recent Comments widget?

Viscaria
Viscaria
11 years ago

*Offers Argenti the high-five of the not-quite-graduated*

I’ve never actually referred to myself as a drop-out before outside of my own head. I’ve been a “student taking a break” for a long time. But October 1 was my real-fulltime-grownup-job-aversary so there’s really no point in pretending.

I’ll go back someday I’m sure.

emilygoddess
emilygoddess
11 years ago

I read Sperm Wars a few years ago. I’ve always been skeptical of his conclusions, and the fact that PUAs find it relevant makes me feel better about my decision to get rid of my copy.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

Viscaria — yeah I don’t really call myself a drop-out either, though I’ve been out for like 6 years now. Because I’d have finished, but no $

Viscaria
Viscaria
11 years ago

That’s a sh***y situation, I’m sorry.

Alice Sanguinaria
11 years ago

I am so confused. EvoPsych is weird.

kittehserf
11 years ago

Alice – it boils down to “menz get to fuck whoever they want and wimmenz make them mammoth and mustard sammiches and pump out babies, because NATURE!”

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

As a nice succinct guide to the dumbassery, I offer this link from the world’s least reputable “psychology” publication. I’m still not entirely convinced that Murdoch doesn’t own this rag.

http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200706/ten-politically-incorrect-truths-about-human-nature