It’s been a while since we checked in with LaidNYC, the alleged pickup artist whose sperm is LIQUID GOLD and whose wisdom about women, and life in general, is liquid, well, something else. Let’s see what we can learn from him.
In one recent post, Mr. LaidNYC brings his unique perspective to the question of raising boys, a topic I’m pretty sure he has no actual experience with. Well, after reading his advice, I can only hope that he has no actual experience with it, and that he never gets any. Some of his insights:
Marry a HAWT chick:
Choose his mother carefully. You are only half responsible for the genetic outcome of your child. You want a thin, young, healthy wife to help assure a healthy child. The mother should embrace the idea of wifely submission and a captain-first mate relationship in which she is not the captain. This will be your son’s first relationship model and it should embed natural gender roles in his mind forever.
Make sure your son knows he’s cockblocking you by even existing, and that you’re making a giant sacrifice by sticking around with mommy, even though she’s no longer the hottie she was when you married her, and you could TOTALLY be dating hotter chicks if she weren’t around.
Make him aware of your sacrifice. As a guy with game, you will likely be passing up lots of pussy and fun times if you choose to have kids. Make him aware of this. He should realize his existence is a gift from you. This will make him respect you more, and a child who respects his father has higher self-worth because he instinctively understands that his father is his genes.
Pay him money to approach HAWT chicks at Farmers’ Markets before he even reaches puberty. Because that’s not weird or creepy at all.
Have him approach girls. When he’s cute and pre-pubescent, take him to a park or farmers market and have him approach smoking hot babes. Give him cute stuff to say, he’ll have a 0% blowout rate. Make it fun for him, not “daddy is making me talk to girls again”. Use monetary incentives if necessary.
Get him a dog, because bitches are bitches amirite high five bro! No, really, that’s his argument:
Get a dog. A dog teaches kids how to love and how to be in charge of something they love. The parallels between dog training and game are staggering.
Also, be a drunk and a letch, because somehow this will benefit him.
Set up some dominoes for him to topple. This is fun. Buy a small piece of bar so he can easily be a bartender when he’s 18. Befriend families in the neighborhood who have hot daughters so he can have an in to fuck them. … Be a regular at a bar or strip club and pass the status on to him.
What kind of status points to you accumulate, exactly, by being a creepy old dude hanging out in a strip club all the time?
Speaking of creepy old dudes, let’s take a look at another post from LaidNYC with the seemingly inoffensive title The Walls of Facebook, in which our hero villain explains some research he’s conducted by creeping through the Facebook pictures of teen girls.
Back when I still had Facebook, I was routinely shocked at HOW MUCH hotter girls, even in their early to mid twenties, used to be just a few years earlier.
In fact, Facebook shows that when women peak is even younger than anyone blogging under their real name would care to admit. Common red pill dogma states that women are their hottest between 18-24.
I say this is bullshit. Try 15-19.
Even that is generous for modern girls in prosperous countries. If she’s going to college to binge drink on weekends and swipe her mealplan card at the buffet line, her peak likely ceases her first semester at around age 18.
True female peak, on average, is probably around 16-18.
High schoolers.
Yep, this is the same guy who was just giving advice on how to be a good parent.
He continues:
Now, we in the red pill community try to stretch that peak to 23 or 24 because most guys don’t have the chance to bang high school girls. There’s the law, different social circles, cock-blocking parents, etc. So we lie to ourselves a bit and claim the 22, 23 year old girls we date are still at peak. Close enough for government work.
Yes, that’s right. He just complained about COCK-BLOCKING PARENTS.
I was going to keep going and go through a couple more posts of his today, but, honestly, HE JUST COMPLAINED ABOUT COCK-BLOCKING PARENTS. I’ve had enough of this creepy bullshit for one day.
Cassandra — and, idk whether yours included it, but “Not everyone is straight! Or cis! And that’s okay!” also needs to get worked in.
We didn’t get “not everyone is cis”, but we did get “not everyone is straight, and that’s no big deal”. And then we got a joke about lesbianism being a plus because hey, at least you only have to worry about STDs rather than STDs plus pregnancy.
(All girls school)
Also, I wonder how this looks from the perspective of American sex ed…when we talked about pregnancy it was treated as assumed that, if we were to get pregnant while we were still at school or university, we would probably want to have an abortion.
Of course these predatory creeps would define a woman/girl’s* “peak” as the point at which they would most like to have sex with her. In their minds, the whole purpose of women and girls is to satisfy men sexually.
I know I haven’t “peaked” because I still have so much knowledge to gain and so many experiences to live and learn from. Over the next decades I am likely to move forward in my career, to possibly have and raise children, to become more comfortable with who I am and what I believe. There is so much of my adult life that I have to look forward to. I wouldn’t ever say that I had “peaked” when all of that is still ahead, and so little is behind me. But that’s because I am a thinking, subjective human being, living for myself. Not a sex toy who exists for creepy PUA fucks.
*I know it’s been said several times now but LAIDINNYC IS TALKING ABOUT CHILDREN.
You know what sex ed leaves out that it really should cover? Penis fractures. Neither Doad nor I had ever heard of this and I seriously thought I’d broken him permanently.
I just got a mental image of LaidInNYC cruising the neighborhood in his Camero with a clipboard, scoping out all the 12-year-olds and rating them on a scale of 1 to 10 so he knows which families to befriend.
And now, if you will excuse me, I have to go wash out my mind’s eye with soap.
It just occurred to me that may have been TMI.
I’m not sure that there is such a thing as TMI here (but maybe that’s just me).
I know this is the least of the fucked-up things that are said up there, but how on earth do you “Buy a small piece of bar”? Do bars have like, stock you can buy into? Part of a chain of bars? How does this even work?
In answer to Molly.
As far as things that ought to be covered in sex ed and aren’t, I nominate “sexual health beyond STDs, and why you shouldn’t let shame or guilt get in the way of checking shit out with a doctor.” My periods stopped when I was in high school, and I never told anyone because I was afraid that if a doctor checked me out, they’d know that I masturbated and tell my parents. Eight years down the line (all through college, I was too afraid of it being something awful to try to find out what was going on, and the depression certainly didn’t help motivation-wise, either), I finally get my ass to a gynecologist, guess what? PCOS, waaaay too-high testosterone, and an increased risk of uterine cancer.
At least now I know that I’m not necessarily infertile (though I am subfertile), and also why I tend to be so much heavier than the rest of my family. But it would have been much more easily managed and much healthier for me if I’d just had the guts to bring it up when it started instead of pretending nothing was wrong out of fear.
::googles penile fracture::
ow
ow
ow
I hope that’s not what my FiL meant when he said he thought it was a bone until he was forty …
Seconding Cassandra re: TMI.
let’s talk about when males peak. i’d say they’re at their cutest at age 6, and then steadily decline from there. what does that have to do with sexuality and proper mate selection? nothing.
i have to laugh my ass off when a man says he wants to get with a 15yo “woman” like emotional and intellectual maturity are not a part of the attraction equation. i believe studies have shown that men who are attracted to teens have low IQs and immaturity issues that repel normal adult women.
Can confirm that these types of guys are attracted to power imbalances first and foremost. I’m 24 years old, but I’m always mistaken for a high schooler if I go out without wearing any makeup. Usually the type of people who hit on me in my natural state quickly lose interest once they find out that I’m not a teenager. (Unless they’re teenagers themselves. In that case, they often become even more interested.)
If it was *just* looks that they were interested in, then my chronological age shouldn’t matter.
He didn’t say dangerously underweight, he just said “thin”. I think most people who would be labelled by others as being “thin” can make a perfectly fine baby, thankyou.
@Cassandra: Well, like you I grew up in a European country, and whenever I hear Americans talk about their sex ed I’m amazed at how good ours was in comparison. Things I still think they did wrong:
1. At one point we were divided into boys and girls and the boys got to talk to the male biology teacher and the girls to the female school nurse. The school nurse talked to us with the assumption that girls are gatekeepers and boys are constantly horny. Mind you, she didn’t assume we’d wait till we got married, but that we wanted to wait until we found a boyfriend whom we really loved, while boys just want to do it all the time.I’ve heard similar stories from lots of other Swedes. Now ALL this crap with girls as gatekeepers and constantly horny boys NEED TO STOP.
2. Despite it being said that homosexuality and bisexuality exists and it’s normal and fine, and statistically we probably have a couple of not-straight people in the class, it was then quickly forgotten and assumed throughout that everyone in class was straight. (See above; it was constantly assumed that the girls were gonna have sex with boys and the other way around.) That’s a problem.
3. No mention at all of the possibility of being trans, although I think that may be different for people growing up nowadays.
4. I do remember a long “rape is wrong” speech, but I wish we’d learned about the importance of CONSENT, how most rapists are someone you know well, and how “little” boundary violations are never ever okay either.
5. ASEXUALITY and NOT wanting to be sex need to be mentioned and explained that it’s perfectly okay and normal. Also that you CAN wait till you get married or whatever if you want to. It was very much assumed in my sex ed that EVERYONE is sexual, and everyone IS gonna start having sex in their teens. Our teacher didn’t explicitly say as much, but it was implicitly assumed throughout.
So, obviously our sex ed was already MIIIIIIILES ahead of the crap Americans here all seem to have gone through, but these are points that I wish were improved, and that often seem to be problems in sex ed nowadays as well – at least that’s the impression I’ve got from speaking to younger people on the topic.
Actually I think teaching young people to regard small boundary violations, and the refusal to back down when discomfort in the person whose boundaries are being violated is clear, as huge, massive, get the hell away from this person right now red flags might be the single most significantly useful thing we could do.
Not only concerns about how he might raise a daughter, but what if any son he had turned out to be homosexual? :/
What kind of fluff has everyone been enjoying recently? After reading the “rape tourettes” article on Return of Kings, I could use some brain bleach. Puppycam is satisfying for only so long (they have to sleep, after all).
@My Eyes: I just read Serra Elinsen’s “Awoken”. You probably need to have read both Lovecraft and Twilight to fully get it, but I have and I thought it was super funny. Serra Elinsen is actually a pseudonym for a group of women, normally videoblog reviewers of movies, who decided to create a Twilight parody together. Since Twilight, there’s been a flood of books that follow the same basic formula, only what kind of supernatural creature the girl falls in love with varies – it’s been werevolves, fairies, angels etc. The women behind the book first thought of doing it with an alien, but turns out that’s been done, and then with a robot, but their fans all called for CTHULU! So Twilight with Cthulu it is. Cthulu seriously goes to high school, in the guise of a hot dude of course, and this girl falls in love with him.
What’s so great is that it isn’t written like a parody at all. It’s super absurd, but it’s written like it’s a completely serious YA Twilight-knock-off. Obviously Cthulu is the worst abusive stalker boyfriend ever, and the girl is all like “Oh Cthulu, you’re right, you’re always right, and I’m not worthy of your love, how can great Cthulu love a mere mortal like me?”. He stalks her and kidnaps her and also kills people and drive people insane and it’s all treated like “hey, he does it out of love, so it’s okay”.
Obviously not everyone’s cup of tea, but as I said, if you’ve read Lovecraft and Twilight (and if you hated Twilight for the twisted relationship dynamics) this is super funny.
Is it in Swedish or in English? I’m always up for a good Twilight parody.
The authors are American, it’s in English.
http://serraelinsen.com/
I imagine this is a done to death discussion here, but I noticed there is a recurring tag about ephebophilia and paedophilia; are MRAs arguing that the former is a morally superior position, or in some ways excusable?
I believe the MRA position is that lusting after children who are menstruating but not at the legal age of consent isn’t paedophilia, it’s ephebophilia which is TOTALLY different and how dare you shame male sexuality (which is of course, monolithic), why do you awful people hate men blah blah blah.
Also summed up in the loathsome phrase “if there’s grass on the field, play ball”.