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bad boys crackpottery creepy douchebaggery emotional abuse gaslighting men who should not ever be with women ever misogyny PUA

The Freak-Out Artist: Julian from Real Social Dynamics takes gaslighting to a new level

I’ve read and watched and listened to a lot of creepy pickup artist crap over the past few years while writing this blog, but in some ways this little video, from PUA “coach” Julian of Real Social Dynamics, one of the bigger and better known of the commercial “game” marketers, may well be the creepiest.  Essentially, Julian provides tips to young men on how to “get” the girl of their dreams by temporarily driving her out of her mind.

No, really: he recommends that men overwhelm their female targets with confusing and contradictory stimuli to throw them so off-balance they’ll reflexively turn to their mental tormenters for support (and, maybe later, reward them with sex). This isn’t pick-up artistry so much as freak-out artistry.

The one thing about this video that is vaguely reassuring is that Julian’s examples of his technique in action are so crude and hamhanded I seriously doubt they’d actually work on anyone “in field,” as the PUAs like to say. What’s not so reassuring is that anyone would actually come up with something this predatory and perverse in the first place. Also, you know that at least a few of the video’s 32,000 viewers have actually tried out this technique on annoyed and bewildered women around the world. The world doesn’t really need any new ways for dudes to be assholes in clubs.

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SittieKitty
11 years ago

You’re doing good Marie, making sense. Don’t worry about it.

dustydeste
dustydeste
11 years ago

I just want to clarify that it was more than “HOLY CRAP MY MOUTH” which I like and can deal with, but more the fact that it was “HOLY CRAP MY ESOPHAGUS, MY STOMACH!” and lasted for at least 10 minutes and then I had an upset stomach for a while, so y’know, YMMV.

(But also I think my upper digestive system may be a bit more sensitive than average, based on the fact that one of my triggers for my vagal syncope is eating too-hot food. Legitimately, I will pass out if I eat potatoes or cassarole right out of the oven.)

Falconer
Falconer
11 years ago

Seeing as there’s a contest for the title of World’s Hottest Pepper, CassandraSays, I’d say you’re in good company.

By the way, is this your eyeball? Boyo found it under the couch.

dustydeste
dustydeste
11 years ago

That said, I do actually really like Thai chilies, just not a whole one in my mouth, I guess? Also the fridge pickles turned out awesome and between Dr. Husbutt and I, we’ve eaten entire small buckets of them.

(Sorry I’m so aggressively chatty today; I’m just really bored and it’s raining buckets so I don’t really want to go out anywhere.)

freemage
freemage
11 years ago

I think Good has been attending this church:

It would certainly explain his moral confusion.

(Side-note: I consider A Vampire in Brooklyn to be the most underrated of all of Eddie Murphy’s films. It’s funny, subversive and inventive, doing things with the vampire legend back in the days when veering from Stoker’s formula was considered taboo among horror fans. And Angela Bassett brings the thunder.)

Marie
11 years ago

@sittiekitty

well, yay that I’m being understandable :/

Falconer
Falconer
11 years ago

@ Fi, thank you! My girl just started crawling and one of the things she likes to do is crawl over and lay her hand on my big toe. She doesn’t squeeze or pull or dig in, she just lays her hand on it and then sits up, like a swimmer slapping the side of the pool after her last lap.

Marie
11 years ago

@freemage

Maybe I’ll have to check out that film, with that recommendation 🙂

@dustydeste

(Sorry I’m so aggressively chatty today; I’m just really bored and it’s raining buckets so I don’t really want to go out anywhere.)

You’re fine, worry not.

cloudiah
11 years ago

I can’t believe there are people here who make macaroni and cheese in a pot. I simply cannot be associated with such people.

:: flounces dramatically, twirling petticoats ::

cloudiah
11 years ago

:: immediately returns, and pretends she never flounced at all::

So hey, what’s up?

CassandraSays
11 years ago

Can you hold on to that eyeball for me? I’m sure it’ll go wandering again later, and I wouldn’t want it to get lost.

MordsithJ
11 years ago

Hmm, maybe I’ll watch it then. I like vampire movies, or at least I used to, until The Books Which Shall Not Be Named happened.

LBT
LBT
11 years ago

I was actually recently reading a book called Fat White Vampire Blues, which is pretty much a guy from New Orleans cheerfully smashing Anne Rice-style vampire books ala Confederacy of Dunces. It’s kind of an interesting cultural oddity, in that the book is VERY powerfully New Orleans, while at the same time predating both Katrina and Twilight by a few years.

That said, I had to stop reading because of the rampant transphobia. Yes, I get it, it’s a book in the style of O’Toole, no character is intended to be sympathetic, but STILL. If you’re hurting trans people, I ain’t laughing.

pecunium
11 years ago

Cloudiah::: immediately returns, and pretends she never flounced at all::

So hey, what’s up?

No worries, s’Good.

😉

Alice Sanguinaria
11 years ago

Marie – Avocado smoothies are delicious! You just put in avocados, milk, and condensed milk in a blender and blend until smooth. SO MOTHERFUCKING GOOD.

A lot of recipes call for ice. My best friend and I don’t use ice. Just don’t forget to refrigerate it if you’re not going to eat it right away! Cover it with plastic wrap touching the top of the smoothie to keep the air out.

(I don’t use measurements in general, so we do it by taste. We use a decent amount of condensed milk though. NOMS)

Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

Actually, the worst with those peppers? Yeah, the bathroom incident was bad, but the shower is Right There (and yes, I did immediately make use of it, because HOLY FUCKING SHIT MY NETHER REGIONS ARE ON FIRE)

The worst? I ate some with my previous winter gloves on (not the frankengloves thankfully, I doubt they’d take washing well)…the next winter I rubbed my eyes not realizing I still had habanero on my gloves. Yes, a year later. And nowhere near water of any sort!

Cute little orange peppers OF DEATH!

Marie
11 years ago

@argenti aertheri

Wow habanero stuff lasts a long time O_o Also, I shamefully did not think to take a shower because I wanted to finish what I was cooking, so…I kind have a bad habit of not thinking of obvious solutions.

Falconer
Falconer
11 years ago

the next winter I rubbed my eyes not realizing I still had habanero on my gloves.

Jesus

hellkell
hellkell
11 years ago

There was a bar in Seattle that used to put Thai chillies in its bar snack mix. It was delicious.

I like ALL the mac-n-cheese, but baked is probably my favorite.

CassandraSays
11 years ago

Since we’re already on food as a topic – favorite bar snacks? Mine is wasabi peanuts (goes well with vodka drinks).

hellkell
hellkell
11 years ago

At El Quixote in MYC, they had some delicious crispy chicken and some kind of omelet thing that was to die for that they brought out for happy hour.

Other that that, nuts and/or Chex mix type nibbles are good.

CassandraSays
11 years ago

There’s a Czech bar in San Francisco that used to offer this snack that was like bruscetta, but a bit spicier? Not sure what it’s called, but it was tasty.

katz
11 years ago

Bruschetta: Now there’s something that anyone with a broiler can make, and probably should.

freemage
freemage
11 years ago

Hm… While I certainly encourage checking out A Vampire in Brooklyn, I should also note: I last watched it maybe 10-15 years ago. I can’t guarantee it aged well, especially since that goes back to the era when my privilege blinders were still pretty much surgically attached. (These days, I can at least usually manage to remove them when I’m reminded that they’re there.) So it’s quite possible, given the era it was made in, that I’m only remembering the parts that still appeal to me now, and there might be something secretly awful lurking in the bits between those.

Marie
11 years ago

@freemage

I’ll keep that in mind should I get around to seeing it. (my too-see list of movies is ridiculously long :p)