That just pisses me off, what you mom did to you. It’s just wrong, wrong, wrong. :head thump on desk: & I’m deeply sorry about your break-up with your ex, because 5 years is a long time.
My typing & grammar are bad when I’ve just woken up, when I’m tired, & when I’m angry & distraught.
Theda Bara
11 years ago
@Kittehs’ Thanks to ye both, Himself, kitties and cuppas? Perfection!
@Tristan Gareth-Grey I’m sorry for what you are going through too. Life can be an awful Esmay at times. (esmay remains my favorite swear word) Thank you for your kind words.
This is probably really minor comparatively, but I need to vent it out…
M’lady and I live in the middle-of-nowhere-Virginia, and are at minimum an hour and a half drive from any of our friends. This doesn’t usually bother me, but lately I’ve been getting both very lonely and very restless. I just want to hang out with people, maybe have a cup of tea, talk about mutual geeky interests, stuff like that. But getting together with anyone is a major trip and not something that can be done just on a whim.
Normally, my various internet-assisted friendships fill the gap, but lately I’ve just… wanted the physical contact too.
I tend towards shyness with new people, which makes it hard to make new friends normally, but coupled with the whole middle-of-nowhere stuff, it’s nearly impossible. Plus, I work opposite hours from most people, so even the sort of social groups/activities I can find don’t mesh with my work schedule.
Hey, I have a personal QUESTION to all insane people on this board: Do you have normal pain sensations? Or can you hurt yourself and not notice?
I used to have really bad depression (idk if that’s insane according to people? Either way, it’s not neurotypical and it messed with me). and as far as I could tell my pain levels were average.
(TW: suicide, self harm)
I recall trying to “practice” cutting myself to see if I could kill myself if I needed an out i.e. parents and/or cops try to take me to a mental institution or something. I didn’t ever really get far because it hurt too much.
(End tw:)
Anyway, my antidepressants are working pretty well now, and my pain is still funky, but not because of my insanity — because of my fibromyalgia, which is often correlated with depression but they don’t always go together.
@Binjabreel
Heh, I remember her going into the hospital, telling the nurse her pain was “about an eight out of ten”, and I had to pull the nurse aside and explain that her 8 was probably most people’s twelve.
Gad, I hate those pain scales! It’s mostly meaningless numbers. Like, my brother (who is able bodied and has been lucky enough to not have many serious injuries) probably would rate my “five” as his “ten”, but my mom might rate my “ten” as her “seven” because of her incredibly painful nerve condition.
@NonServiam
@Binjabreel Yeah, when I’m depressed it feels more like I’m switched off than sad.
I get sad /because/ I’m switched off.
Me: Nothing matters.
Me: I HATE THAT NOTHING MATTERS WHY DO I EXIST IF NOTHING MATTERS
Me: *gratuitous crying*
@Tristan Gareth-Grey
Thanks for the hugs. Unfortunately for me, it’s all shoved in my face every single day, even in my own home. So I can avoid it, even if I wanted to.
I just… this resonated with me for some reason. A marginalized group can never escape isms, because it’s so dang ingrained in every part of society.
palmedfire – I can so relate to that. I’m not in the middle of nowhere in the small town sense, but in the outermost suburb (Melbourne is as big geographically as Greater London); it’s an eighty-minute trip to town by train and I don’t drive. This suburb’s dead as far as things I’m interested in go, all my friends live overseas, and I’m also not good with socialising with new people. You totally have my sympathy on this one!
Shaun – Oh. Oh gods. Oh gods, MRAs, why do you consist in harassing individual women for speaking out and trying to solve problems that you refuse to correct?
I like that one okay… 😛 (i’ve seen it floating around some chronic pain/disability blogs). I admit, as a pain scale, maybe the doctors would take it more seriously, since you can see expressions, as opposed to an ambiguous “five”
The best one I’ve seen (the one I use if I feel the need to communicate pain to family members and saying “it fucking hurts okay” doesn’t work) says what your pain limits you to doing lilke “Cannot concnetrate for more than thirty minutes due to pain but can work with effort” or “physical activity and work severly limited” or other stuff. I haven’t been able to find it again, tho.
Pain scale I could use — “nope, sorry, it requires moving more than my arms and my back thinks spasms are fun”, “lol, yeah right, my knee(s) are screaming”, “[insert joint here] is cranky”, “please stand on my right/left, my neck has decided turning the other way hurts”, and the good old “amazingly, I don’t need advil currently” (lol, which is only half true since I usually don’t even bother since it just means adding “stomach acid is delicious” to my list of complaints)
Scoliosis, which means everything connected to my spine is wonky, as are the weight bearing bits…combine with typing at weird angles for years and I’ve pissed off more joints than I care to count.
As for my pain tolerance, idk if it’s that, or cuz I’m nuts, but fucking nothing tends to actually hurt. Truly cranky muscles, like, spasm level cranky, I’m down for the count. When I lost my big toe’s nail to a door…holy fuck was that painful for weeks…but not bad enough to bother using my student health care. Smashing myself with hammers? Walk calmly to a sink and turn on the cold water.
I do have the sense to refuse more stairs than needed when they’re making me wince, but yeah, my knees are fucking shot. To the point the narcissist ex had a chiropractor friend who questioned how I walked on them and refused to touch them (did wonders for that whole “so misaligned the attached muscles are spasming” thing though)
So yeah, if I say it hurts, we’re probably in the realm where most people would be whimpering. (This makes for interesting sexytimes since I’m a masochist who can take a lot ^.^ )
Not only are they harassing hte prof, but they filmed some women tearing down the posters, put up a video denoucing them as “fascists,” have posted their pictures on AVFM and are actively trying to doxx them.
I’m not sure what the appropriate thing to do is about this. This is obviously just going to be their standard procedure forever.
We Hunted The Mammoth
@Theda
That just pisses me off, what you mom did to you. It’s just wrong, wrong, wrong. :head thump on desk: & I’m deeply sorry about your break-up with your ex, because 5 years is a long time.
^^^^
***your***
My typing & grammar are bad when I’ve just woken up, when I’m tired, & when I’m angry & distraught.
@Kittehs’ Thanks to ye both, Himself, kitties and cuppas? Perfection!
@Tristan Gareth-Grey I’m sorry for what you are going through too. Life can be an awful Esmay at times. (esmay remains my favorite swear word) Thank you for your kind words.
I’m sorry your family is being assholes, Theda. That is really shitty.
@Tristan — You’re welcome! I don’t really have advice to give, I damn well better be able to listen!
If I may fanboy a bit — I JUST SAW MY BABY GIRL CRAWL 18 INCHES.
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
@Falconer Eeeee indeed! The little things are the best things.
Next thing you know she’ll be crawling EVERYWHERE! Get ready to chase babies!
I need to pick up my dirty socks….
Yay for baby crawls!
You know it’s only a matter of time before you’ll be walking on Legos, don’t you?
It’ll probably be Duplos first.
But I have a lot of experience keeping my four-siders picked up.
Oh geez, probably time to explore diceless RPGs for a while….
OW ow ow … worse than kitty litter fragments …
Yay for milestones!
Falconer — I just set you up with one! (Well, the P&P version is d10, but that’s not relevant now is it?)
And my mother says it’s time to childproof the house and AWWWWW
This is probably really minor comparatively, but I need to vent it out…
M’lady and I live in the middle-of-nowhere-Virginia, and are at minimum an hour and a half drive from any of our friends. This doesn’t usually bother me, but lately I’ve been getting both very lonely and very restless. I just want to hang out with people, maybe have a cup of tea, talk about mutual geeky interests, stuff like that. But getting together with anyone is a major trip and not something that can be done just on a whim.
Normally, my various internet-assisted friendships fill the gap, but lately I’ve just… wanted the physical contact too.
I tend towards shyness with new people, which makes it hard to make new friends normally, but coupled with the whole middle-of-nowhere stuff, it’s nearly impossible. Plus, I work opposite hours from most people, so even the sort of social groups/activities I can find don’t mesh with my work schedule.
Like I said, just needed to vent.
@Dvärghundspossen
I used to have really bad depression (idk if that’s insane according to people? Either way, it’s not neurotypical and it messed with me). and as far as I could tell my pain levels were average.
(TW: suicide, self harm)
I recall trying to “practice” cutting myself to see if I could kill myself if I needed an out i.e. parents and/or cops try to take me to a mental institution or something. I didn’t ever really get far because it hurt too much.
(End tw:)
Anyway, my antidepressants are working pretty well now, and my pain is still funky, but not because of my insanity — because of my fibromyalgia, which is often correlated with depression but they don’t always go together.
@Binjabreel
Gad, I hate those pain scales! It’s mostly meaningless numbers. Like, my brother (who is able bodied and has been lucky enough to not have many serious injuries) probably would rate my “five” as his “ten”, but my mom might rate my “ten” as her “seven” because of her incredibly painful nerve condition.
@NonServiam
I get sad /because/ I’m switched off.
Me: Nothing matters.
Me: I HATE THAT NOTHING MATTERS WHY DO I EXIST IF NOTHING MATTERS
Me: *gratuitous crying*
@Tristan Gareth-Grey
I just… this resonated with me for some reason. A marginalized group can never escape isms, because it’s so dang ingrained in every part of society.
palmedfire – I can so relate to that. I’m not in the middle of nowhere in the small town sense, but in the outermost suburb (Melbourne is as big geographically as Greater London); it’s an eighty-minute trip to town by train and I don’t drive. This suburb’s dead as far as things I’m interested in go, all my friends live overseas, and I’m also not good with socialising with new people. You totally have my sympathy on this one!
Message to Theda Bara if you’re reading:
Did we ever swap emails?
News from Canada. Bad news, and don’t read the comments.
http://www.huffingtonpost.ca/2013/09/16/mens-rights-edmonton-rape-posters_n_3938004.html?ncid=edlinkusaolp00000003
I got nothin’.
Shaun – Oh. Oh gods. Oh gods, MRAs, why do you consist in harassing individual women for speaking out and trying to solve problems that you refuse to correct?
@Fade
Better pain scales:
http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/10/27/65/1027659f6bbb154bc4f214841222e59f.jpg
http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/736x/f3/ea/8f/f3ea8fb5dfde1a13252a5189e578d7e1.jpg
The full post can be found here:
http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/02/boyfriend-doesnt-have-ebola-probably.html
@neuroticbeagle.
I like that one okay… 😛 (i’ve seen it floating around some chronic pain/disability blogs). I admit, as a pain scale, maybe the doctors would take it more seriously, since you can see expressions, as opposed to an ambiguous “five”
The best one I’ve seen (the one I use if I feel the need to communicate pain to family members and saying “it fucking hurts okay” doesn’t work) says what your pain limits you to doing lilke “Cannot concnetrate for more than thirty minutes due to pain but can work with effort” or “physical activity and work severly limited” or other stuff. I haven’t been able to find it again, tho.
Pain scale I could use — “nope, sorry, it requires moving more than my arms and my back thinks spasms are fun”, “lol, yeah right, my knee(s) are screaming”, “[insert joint here] is cranky”, “please stand on my right/left, my neck has decided turning the other way hurts”, and the good old “amazingly, I don’t need advil currently” (lol, which is only half true since I usually don’t even bother since it just means adding “stomach acid is delicious” to my list of complaints)
Scoliosis, which means everything connected to my spine is wonky, as are the weight bearing bits…combine with typing at weird angles for years and I’ve pissed off more joints than I care to count.
As for my pain tolerance, idk if it’s that, or cuz I’m nuts, but fucking nothing tends to actually hurt. Truly cranky muscles, like, spasm level cranky, I’m down for the count. When I lost my big toe’s nail to a door…holy fuck was that painful for weeks…but not bad enough to bother using my student health care. Smashing myself with hammers? Walk calmly to a sink and turn on the cold water.
I do have the sense to refuse more stairs than needed when they’re making me wince, but yeah, my knees are fucking shot. To the point the narcissist ex had a chiropractor friend who questioned how I walked on them and refused to touch them (did wonders for that whole “so misaligned the attached muscles are spasming” thing though)
So yeah, if I say it hurts, we’re probably in the realm where most people would be whimpering. (This makes for interesting sexytimes since I’m a masochist who can take a lot ^.^ )
I see AVfM regulars GWW and Neil “the ballerina is the stamen of privilege” Westlake are there, pooping in the comments.
Not only are they harassing hte prof, but they filmed some women tearing down the posters, put up a video denoucing them as “fascists,” have posted their pictures on AVFM and are actively trying to doxx them.
I’m not sure what the appropriate thing to do is about this. This is obviously just going to be their standard procedure forever.
It’s a vicious cycle, isn’t it? They just want to harass people, but if you try to do anything about it, you just get put on their harassment list.