Over on MGTOWforums.com, a fellow calling himself donttrustwomen has written a little, well, I don’t quite know what it is — an essay? a manifesto? a poem? — called “The Average Woman of Today.” I think it’s fairly clear from reading it that he has never taken a course in statistics. And has possibly never actually met a woman.
The average woman of today is in the club every weekend
The average woman of today has 10-20 “good guy friends”
The average woman of today has 150 guys in her phone
The average woman of today dresses scandalous
I don’t know about that, but I’m pretty sure the average woman (of a certain age) of today watches Notorious.
Our MGTOW statistician continues:
The average woman of today has 1-2 abortions on her resume
I don’t think that generally goes on the resume. Where would it even go? Under “hobbies?”
Also, according to the Guttmacher Institute, less than half of American women have abortions by the age of 45. (Not that there’s anything wrong with that.)
The average woman of today has or had a STD
Well, this is true. It’s also true of the average man of today. Indeed, according to the CDC, Human Papillomavirus (HPV) is so common that nearly all sexually active people get it at some point in their life. Happily, most STDs are treatable. Also, use condoms!
The average woman of today cheats on her boyfriend or husband
Well, this is also true, at least according to the stats I found here, which suggest that a little more than half of women cheat on their partners at some point in their life. But guess what? Men cheat on their partners in similar numbers.
The average woman of today curses like a sailor
The average woman of today wears to much makeup
The average woman of today seeks attention whether negative or positive
Huh. For some reason the first person who pops to mind when I hear the phrase “attention seeking” is not a woman.
The average woman of today is on dating sites getting 100 msgs a day
Not exactly. There aren’t good numbers on this, but one online experiment found that while more conventionally attractive women could indeed get dozens of messages a day, an average woman might get all of three.
Also, have you actually seen the sorts of messages women on dating sites get? Who would even want to sort through a hundred of these a day?
The average woman of today expects you to pay her bills
Uh, what?
The average woman of today expects you to raise and accept her child out of wedlock
Well, no. But if you do agree to, say, marry a woman with children, her kids do indeed come as part of the deal. Just as when a woman marries a divorced father with kids. You are of course free to not date women with children or indeed any women at all.
The average woman of today rarely brings any redeeming qualities to the table
I’m not really seeing how a regular commenter on MGTOWforums.com really has any reason to complain on this front.
The average woman of today is manipulative
The average woman of today is selfish
The average woman of today gets bored easily
I think you may actually be talking about kitties here, not women. But kitties are adorable, so we forgive them.
Onward:
The average woman of today is on facebook, twitter, instagram feeding her ego through likes and followers
Yeah, no men ever do that.
The average woman of today would be stoned and called a harlot 3,000 years ago
The average woman of today rides the cock carousel
The average woman of today gives it up on the first night
Why does it make these guys so angry that there are women out there who enjoy having sex with men?
The average woman of today is unappreciative
Of dudes on the internet who hate her?
The average woman of today has lewd photos or videos circulating on the internet
Despite the astounding number of lewd pictures and videos online, I suspect that the percentage of women who’ve appeared in them is still relatively small. I wonder, though, how the number of women who’ve put nude or “lewd” pics of themselves on the internet compares to the number of guys who’ve sent dick pics to willing or unwilling recipients?
The average woman of today follows hypergamy
“Hypergamy,” in the traditional sense of “marrying upward” is actually on the decline, as women move in greater numbers into better paying jobs. “Doctors used to marry nurses,” Katrin Bennhold observes in a piece on the subject in the New York Times. “Now doctors marry doctors.”
The average woman of today files for divorce 70 percent of the time
Donttrustwomen seems to be confusing a couple of different statistics here. Yes, when couples divorce, the woman is more likely to be the one to file for divorce — though this does not necessarily imply that she’s the one responsible for breaking up the marriage. But 70% of marriages don’t end in divorce. Heck, the old saw about 50% of marriages ending in divorce is a myth; the correct percentage may be as low as 30.
The average woman of today looks for a starter husband
The average woman of today can’t tell the difference between a guy who cares about them and a guy who just wants them for sex
The average woman of today is unfit to marry or even call a girlfriend.
Keep telling yourself all this, dude. It’s in everybody’s best interests for you, personally, to continue to go your own way. Aren’t you guys getting an island, or something?
Wouldn’t it be great if MGTOW actually just went away? We could throw a party! A Misandry Party! 😀
“The average woman of today dresses scandalous”
So, unless he’s implying that metaphorically all women work as wardrobe assistants to a hypothetical participant on RuPaul’s Drag Race, I think he’s actually searching for the adverbial form.
Which is stupid, because really- what can you actually do to cause a “scandal”, clothingwise? I’m sure this is code for the usual: “women dress in a manner I find provocative, but they won’t have sex with me, so I find that angering, and if they don’t dress that way I will deem them frigid, uptight and dowdy, because they still won’t have sex with me”.
Apparently the average MGTOWer of today feels entitled to dictate what women wear, how we spend our leisure time, our speech patterns, when/with whom we might have sex, who we can marry, and whether or not we are allowed to leave a marriage.
@Viscaria: Maybe dictating those things for women are all the “rights” that they say they have lost since feminism took over. I can never be sure though, because when an MRA (or friend) is ranting about all the rights he’s lost since feminism and I ask him what specific rights those are, he can never quite give me a straight answer…
It’s not that these doods have never met complex, 3D, “real” women.
It’s that they interpret all women as simplistic, shallow, two-dimensional beings no matter what the individual women (including women they meet and interact with) are actually like.
I hope they’ll finally make good on their “threat” and go the fuck away.
I’ve worried that wearing a tiara every day might look a little princess-y, but now I know I’m being average. Whew! Wait, what were we talking about? This is boring. I’m out. Think I’ll go out naked today, see if I scandalize anyone. With my tiara, of course.
But srsly, you guys? I am so awesome. You don’t even know. I have all these qualities.
I WOULD HAVE NEVER GUESSED !!1!
/hilarious joke
So I went over and looked at the replies, and no surprise they’re at least equally as dumb.
I’m gonna try blockquoting for the first time here:
Exactly how can you tell that, dude? Just from the fact that she’s there whenever you are, because she’s doing her job?
Oh, blockquote first try is a mess. Sorry.
Ghosting is, of course, imitating that pottery scene from Ghost.
The average woman of today eats three pounds of bacon every midnight on March 16, just because she can.
The average woman of today is a jar of fireflies trained to execute very complex tricks.
The average woman of today is the second stage of a Saturn V rocket, though her liquid fuel and oxidizer have long since evaporated over the decades since the cancellation of the US Moon program.
The average woman of today is having jerk chicken for lunch. It symbolizes the symbolic castration of men via sluts refusing to have sex with them (hence the “jerk” part).
Wow, I can’t check a single thing on that list (except maybe the last one, idk) and I’m the most average person I know.
Or am I not? Does this mean I’m a special snowflake on the inside?
And really if a guy calls himself ‘donttrustwomen’ I get suspicious. Maybe all women he’s ever met has been the exact opposite of this list but since he don’t trust women he believes all of it is fake and wrote this inside out? hm..
I’m pretty sure the average woman of today is, in fact, a conglomeration of cats in a David suit.
The average woman spends every weekend squeezing key limes for a delicious pie. Thus she has no fingerprints.
The average woman of today cut the brakes on a clown car just because she felt like it.
The average woman of today feels like eating mozzarella, but doesn’t really want to have it on anything, you know?
The average woman of today orbits the sun at a slightly slower speed than the Earth. Unbound by the planet’s gravity, she is slowly lifting off the ground at a tangent and disappearing into the sky.
The average woman of today once ate lunch with Weird Al Yankovic at an Indian restaurant in St, Paul.
“The average woman of today once ate lunch with Weird Al Yankovic at an Indian restaurant in St, Paul.”
I feel like I need to do this some day.
The average woman just today learned of the existence of the “crypto-jews” of Portugal.
The average woman has become addicted to hibiscus tea.
The average woman just realized she will have to work through the weekend to finish her performance evaluations.
The average woman is the elected spiritual and organizational leader of a worldwide network of lichenologists.
The average woman just made herself some iced coffee, which represents the chilling boner-killing effects she has on sexist doods.
Later, the average woman will shop for hand soap and maybe check out scented candles because she rolls evil that way.
cloudiah: from one average woman to another, performance evals are giant time-sucks. Boo.
The average woman of today woke up unsure whether the world spontaneously became a mirror image of itself, or if it was always like that and she just didn’t notice.
The average woman of today knows sixty ways to kill a man, but she would only have to use one on you.
The average woman of today likes to occasionally disguise herself to spend a day as a train conductor.
The average woman abandoned him on the median, and it’s made him mean.