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narcissism open thread playing the victim rape culture trigger warning victim blaming

Open Thread for discussion of Ariel Castro statement, sentencing. TRIGGER WARNING for whole thread.

Some commenters here have started discussing the Ariel Castro sentencing — and the remarkable, delusional, self-pitying, victim-blaming statement he made before being sentenced — in the Minter Meltdown thread. Because so much of what he said — and so many of the issues raised — are potentially triggering, I thought it would be good to open up a separate thread for this.

Here’s a piece at the Daily Beast with some of the most astounding quotes from Castro’s statement today.

Consider this whole thread to have a TRIGGER WARNING on it for discussions of Castro’s rape apologias and victim blaming.

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Hyena Girl
11 years ago

Pardon me while I go somewhere else for a little bit and shout swears, and perhaps jump up and down a little.

Shadow
Shadow
11 years ago

All I can say is that I wish him a long, lucid and utterly miserable life. I hope that his every waking moment is filled with regret, sadness and loneliness and that his nights are plagued with nightmares.

Chie Satonaka
Chie Satonaka
11 years ago

Thanks for providing a safe space to try to process this horrific case, David.

bodycrimes
11 years ago

My only thought is – how many more women are chained in cellars? We’ve had the Natascha K. case in Austria. The Fritzl case in Austria, cases in the UK, and now this. They’re all the same story. Older man kidnaps girl and forces her to live in cellar. Rapes her repeatedly. Is caught and ends up in loony bin.

That there are so many makes me think there are more women and girls out there, locked in cellars.

cloudiah
11 years ago

So far, r/mr, The Spreadhead, and AVoiceforMisogynists are silent on the sentencing.

At one point, I was trying to make a search engine that would automatically search all the sites on the boob roll, but I got distracted.

myeyestheyburn
myeyestheyburn
11 years ago

Posting under a different e-mail for reasons I’m happy to discuss with David.

TRIGGER WARNING:

http://mensrightsboard.blogspot.com.au/2013/07/ariel-castro-is-misunderstood.html

Someone said to me the other day that they “could find a thousand abhorrent things said by feminists just by googling, but I bet you’d have a hard time finding something equally as awful by an MRA”.

Excuse me while I go and bathe. This kind of ick warrants the wire brush and dettol routine.

Chie Satonaka
Chie Satonaka
11 years ago

I know there is a lot of talk on other websites (news sites, Gawker, etc) about the plea deal and that it’s an “outrage.” I for one am in favor of it. Just look at what this asshole was able to say during his brief sentencing. Imagine what it would be like for these women to have to testify at trial, with him sitting right there staring at them, and being forced to relive every moment of their torture, and see the media falling all over themselves to cover every lurid detail, and have all of it drag out over weeks. It’s a mercy that he doesn’t get his trial. He’s a narcissist — he loves this shit. Lock him in a room for the rest of his life.

grumpycatisagirl
11 years ago

Just a tiny technical nitpick – that piece is from The Daily Beast, not the Huffington Post.

Thanks for creating a separate thread for this, David.

MordsithJ
11 years ago

Well, now that it’s on Manboobz I’m sure the manosphere’s hamsters are all a-spinning.

grumpycatisagirl
11 years ago

“Someone said to me the other day that they “could find a thousand abhorrent things said by feminists just by googling, but I bet you’d have a hard time finding something equally as awful by an MRA”.

Every time I think I’ve already run across the most preposterous thing I’ve ever read . . .

Glock H. Palin, Esq. (@GlockPalin)

I did not prey on these women. I just acted on my sexual instincts.

Biotroofs, anyone?

So far, r/mr, The Spreadhead, and AVoiceforMisogynists are silent on the sentencing.

Give them a little time, and I’m sure they’ll come up with some utterly appalling spin that blames it on women. It’s just going to take an extra bit of creativity this time, but I am fully confident the MRAs are up to the challenge.

Ally S
11 years ago

@myeyestheyburn

[Continued trigger warning for horrifying abuse and rape apologia]

Everyone is so quick to paint Ariel Castro as the bad guy just because he let 3 women stay with him thus offering them his protection. Ariel Castro gave these women a purpose. The only purpose they are on this earth for and a white knight who is a felon himself put these women back on the street where they can face real danger. When you get right down to it Ariel Castro is not really a bad guy just as Charles Ramsey is no saint. Charles Ramsey has been in and out of prison a lot and he even tried to kill his wife. No one takes into consideration that Castro himself is victim of child abuse and they don’t care that some felon has added to that abuse. They don’t care that a matriarchial society has victimized Castro because all they want is the blood of a man,any man. When Charles Ramsey goes on to victimize one of your brothers,uncles,fathers,nephews or male cousins then we’ll see if you still regard him as a hero.

No comment.

myeyestheyburn
myeyestheyburn
11 years ago

No kidding.

I don’t understand why so many young men I know identify with the MRM and bash feminism, refusing to acknowledge that the MRM is so often spouting horrible ideas like in the link above yet always happy to call on the old “man-hating women’s club” remarks from feminism decades ago. That isn’t to say there aren’t man-haters who are self-proclaimed feminists. But I’ve found the real difference is that there are thousands of feminist sites I can find that actively work towards making the world a better place through activism and fundraising, but few men’s rights sites that are anything but angry, sometimes seemingly-psychotic males with a chip on their shoulder. That and there seems to be a creepy correlation between racism and anti-feminism, and that rings true with those I know in person sadly.

Defending this piece of shit though? WTF is wrong with people?

franky tea
franky tea
11 years ago

I don’t understand why so many young men I know identify with the MRM and bash feminism, refusing to acknowledge that the MRM is so often spouting horrible ideas like in the link above yet always happy to call on the old “man-hating women’s club” remarks from feminism decades ago

My guess is because they agree with whose awful things

CassandraSays
11 years ago

If someone started repeating MRA talking points in my presence they would very quickly become a former rather than a current friend.

Glock H. Palin, Esq. (@GlockPalin)

But I’ve found the real difference is that there are thousands of feminist sites I can find that actively work towards making the world a better place through activism and fundraising, but few men’s rights sites that are anything but angry, sometimes seemingly-psychotic males with a chip on their shoulder.

This. A thousand times this. You can find some hatefulness on the fringes of feminism, but the movement as a whole is actually about *doing something*, about making the world a better place. For MRAs, the hatefulness *IS* the movement. Get rid of the hate, and there’s practically nothing left.

CassandraSays
11 years ago

Well, there’s still the whining about not getting enough sex with hawt ladies. No lack of that in the MRM.

hellkell
hellkell
11 years ago

Yeah, I would find new people (if possible) if those around me were spouting mra talking points and agreeing.

In other news, WordPress can eat a bowl if bees. It won’t load for me on two browsers on two separate computers, only my phone. Anyone else having issues?

myeyestheyburn
myeyestheyburn
11 years ago

Fortunately I wouldn’t call most of these people my friends, I never made that effort as they made their agenda known quickly enough for me to run like hell. Two, who I initially had hope for, I certainly don’t any longer (I drew the line at “females are the major perpetrators of sexual violence because I read it on the internet”) and one I am tiring quickly of, but I live with them (thankfully they are not actively identifying with the cause, just deny that women are disadvantaged… which is awful, yes, but at least I’m spared the Farrell quotes).

Turning the discussion away from my own experiences, though, sometimes I genuinely worry how people who are spoonfed this kind of stuff might impact the future. There are enough assholes already, for example, in government. I hope the new generation won’t be as bad or worse.

I’m liking that the paternity laws around rape are being reviewed though. It’s a step in the right direction and I hope Amanda Berry and her daughter never have to go through the kind of pain that many mothers already do when abusive fathers seek access to their children. It looks like he’ll be locked up for life though, thank goodness.

CassandraSays
11 years ago

I was having WordPress issues last week. Apparently it singles us out one by one just like the blockquote monster.

Karalora
11 years ago

MRAs defend Ariel Castro because he actually did what they only fantasize about doing.

Xen
Xen
11 years ago

“I did not prey on these women. I just acted on my sexual instincts.”

Then maybe your “sexual instincts” need to be cut off.

hellkell
hellkell
11 years ago

Myeyesburn: spoofed what, mra stuff? I think that’s something you have to go looking for. I’m more worried about the bog standard sexists that are everywhere.

CassandraSays
11 years ago

Shorter Castro – words mean whatever is most convenient for me.

MorkaisChosen
MorkaisChosen
11 years ago

Have to say I think life in prison is exactly the right thing to do. He’s obviously unrepentant, so he needs to be locked away for public safety; I don’t think there’s a realistic chance of rehabilitation in this case, so there’s no reason to let him out.

But I still think chaining him up and beating him would be society lowering itself that bit closer to his level.

(In response mainly to augzilliary upthread.)

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