Hello, and welcome to The Man Boobz Fiction Workshop! Today we will learn my foolproof two-step method for writing believable fiction. It’s as easy as pie — well, easier, since pie can take a bit of finesse — and it is absolutely GUARANTEED to work.
Here it is.
STEP ONE: Write believable fiction.
STEP TWO: If step one fails, write a story that makes a woman look evil and foolish, and post it to the Men’s Rights Subreddit as a true story.
If you don’t believe me, check out this little story from a fella calling himself the-final-word — a Redditor for less than two weeks, with only one previous comment to his name — in which a highly successful gentleman happily humiliates an ex-girlfriend trying to steal his money with the old “baby” ploy.
Take a look at the thread itself to see how eagerly the Men’s Righsers eat up his tale of victory over evil womanhood!
That is the beauty of my two-step method. If people don’t believe your bullshit, find a more gullible audience. And there are few audiences in this world more gullible than Men’s Rightsers.
I should note that I had nothing to do with the-final-word’s story, nor did I sneak into the Men’s Rights subreddit to give his story 47 upvotes and a bunch of positive comments.
Thanks to hackattack92 in the AgainstMensRights Subreddit for pointing out this wonderful example of shitthatneverhappened.txt
Oh wait, Argenti ninja’d me. Damn.
Well, I didn’t name the poor hapless beta.
Okay, I don’t tell this story much, since I like people telling me how that makes me really stoical and manly. Not really, I don’t really care about that. I’m an outlaw.
So I met the love of my life when I was seventeen. We had a really great thing going, got married, had a child of some sort. There was a lot of mutual respect in that relationship: she respected how well I kept her in flavoured mineral water and bonbons, and I respected…whatever it was she did. Sammiches? Then I took the Red Pill and left to make my fortune. I’m an outlaw.
Fast-forward ten years, I’m a friggin’ squillionaire. Then whatserface shows up, totally interrupts my CounterStrike tournament with her ‘do you maybe want to visit with your son/daughter at some point?’. You know what I’m talking about. Anyway, I scream ‘Get thee to a nunnery!’ and slam the door in her face. Then I finally remembered to file for divorce. I know, I know, but I can’t be expected to keep track of these things. I’m an outlaw.
———————————————————————-
Hm, well, maybe not the most original offering. Everybody else’s has made me literally splutter with laughter, but maybe that’s just the internalised misandry talking. You all are splendid human people, so far as I can tell.
I have a child, of some description, myself.
And that description is SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.
Nope, that description is, per my mother “double squeeee”
hehe yep…I am responsible for NWO….and yes, I also emasculated all the men by making sure everything was safe and hired a bunch of women to be sign women and do nothing but make signs about safety…they make 100 dollars an hour while the hard working men make 3 pennies an hour!
Falconer, your babies are adorable!
@ Kitteh – thanks! 😀
Let me tell you all a story. Once upon a time I was a hot, fertile 15-24 year old. I had an array of beta orbiters who just wanted to be loved, but I didn’t want love. I wanted to bang the alphas night and day. My beta-est beta even told me “Girl I’d hunt mammoths for you, all I want is for you to just give me a chance”. But I laughed in his face and made him drive me to one of my slutty cock carousel parties. I used my gaggle of pathetic betas as cash cows and boy, did I milk them. I had a job too, but all I had to do was wear a short skirt and show cleavage (and drop a few sexual harrassment complaint threats, o hoho!) and my boss let me get away with doing nothing but drinking coffee and making aliens out of Blu-Tac all day long 2 days aweek but for a weeks pay. I had so much money. I spent all of it on mani-pedis, scented fucking candles and baby foreskin face cream in an attempt to stay hot for the alpha males. Eventually though, I reached my expiration date and on my 25th birthday all the alphas got restraining orders against me, because I just woke up gross and shrivelled. Fortunately I had a feminist friend and she indoctrinated me into the secret feminazi cabal. Slowly I began to formulate a plan. I remembered my beta orbiters from my glory days and found out were the beta-est of all lived.
I turned up at his house with my biggest jar of baby foreskin face cream…and, well, he knew where this was going straight away. While I was cackling away with my fellow feminazi hag friends, he had taken The Red Pill, started lifting, fucked all the HB10s in the county and started his own business that made £1million dollars a week. This meant that he could afford the best lawyers in the entire world. I took him to court to try and force him to take a paternity test, but his legal team used ancient divination techniques to read the wrinkles on my hideous 26-year-old scrunchy leather bag face, and those wrinkles said I’M A LYING WHORE! and the jury said i was guilty and had to go to prison for 10 years. I tried to accuse him of rape to get out of it, but those damn gross over-25-woman wrinkles gave it away again so they bumped it up to 20 years.
When I emerged, menopausal, barren and haggard from prison, i tried desperatly to hook some omega orbiters to try and steal used condoms from, but even they wouldn’t touch me. They all just laughed at me in the street, then walked off arm in arm with their incredibly lifelike sexbots, which had been invented while I was in prison. I looked around at all the fat, ugly, beta and below guys walking around with hot sexy babes fawning over them. I saw something in the corner which I had assumed was a giant mound of rags, but it moved and I realised it was all the women who had been thrown out by their men. They were huddling for warmth and shelter from the icy glares of the masculine liberated men and their hot HB10 submissive sexbot wives. Suddenly, everything shifted into perspective, and I dropped to my knees and screamed NOOOO at the sky for 10 minutes. I then bought a cat and shuffled into the mound of rejected women, hoping my red pill masters would toss me a pity bon bon.
The End.
Thanks, and all hail!
Unrelated, but dear GOD, the g0ys site got even MORE poorly designed recently. I didn’t even think that was possible, what with the frames, the animated backgrounds, but now there’s multiple blinky things, multiple frames, animations that are BROKEN when you hover over them… it’s like a design train wreck of machismo. God help us all.
So, when I was younger I was kind of a punk, I skated and all that stuff, and there was this girl I liked, she was really fancy, did ballet and everything. I could tell she wanted me too, but all her prissy stuck up “friends” didn’t like my baggy clothes, and since women are all part of a hivemind she totally blew me off, saying “see ya later, boy”.
She eventually married an asshole alpha jock and got pregnant and then the alpha left her and she became a single mother. Meanwhile, I got signed up by a record label for a million dollar contract, and I hooked up with this really hot rocker chick. So five years later I call ballet girl up and I tell her to turn on the TV, and there I am, rocking up MTV. She call all her friends and they already know, and they’ve got tickets for the show, so they all come see me at the show and I could see her in the crowd, looking up at the guy she turned down all these years ago, and I just thought “Yeah! I wasn’t good enough for you? Well now I’m a superstar, slamming on my guitar! Do you see what I’m worth now, huh?”
And then, just to add insult to injury, my hot rocker girlfriend and me wrote a song about ballet girl, and how awesome I am, and how dumb she was for turning me down, and it sold like over a million copies.
I have to confess, whenever I’m up on stage rocking and riding my skateboard at the same time, and I inevitably crash and get a concussion, I fall unconscious grinning.
*is the right age to now have that stuck in my head*
Thanks a lot Myoo
@LBT: I was on StumbleUpon (bear with me, I was really REALLY bored, haha) the other day, looking through the food/cooking stuff as per usual, and some weird g0y site came up. It was really surreal, what with my never having encountered their stuff in the wild before. But seriously, it’s pretty pathetic that they’re so desperate for exposure that they’re spamming their stuff into a food/cooking site aggregator, and one that’s pretty third-rate and has-been at this point, to boot.
RE: Myoo
GODDAMMIT MYOO! Now I’m going to have to listen to like half an hour of Bon Jovi to get that out of my goddamned head.
RE: dustydeste
Oh god. I’ve spent too many of my precious hours MSTing those buggers and being boggled. Which one was it, the Cockrub Warriors or someone else?
@Argenti
If it’s any consolation, it’s stuck in my head too.
When I was a little girl, we went to a diner this one time and this boy came up and offered to let me play with his dump truck, but there was another boy with a toy sports car so I went and played with him instead. Then in high school he was working as a dishwasher and he tried to give me some flowers but he slipped and fell down and was a total loser. Then in college we were at the diner and he ordered me a hot dog with a heart drawn in ketchup but I took the plate and smeared it on his shirt and we all laughed at his beta mangina ass.
But then he became a famous R&B artist and I saw him one time with a sports car full of pretty girls while I was mopping floors. I’m pretty sure he went to sleep grinning that night.
What is a system member? How does someone’s soul get torn apart? I’m totally confused.
Totally left out the most important part. And he was like, “Fuck you!”
AAAHHHHH!!you got that song in my head too!!!
I am know listening to Pinks U and ur hand tonight to get it out of my head….which is kind of muahahahaha stupid MRA song too
Once upon a time, before I was 25, I rode the cock carousel while married to my beta husband/slave. He made ME sammiches. Anyhow, I got knocked up on alpha sperm all the time- so much so that I was a Platinum Member at the local abortion clinic. My beta husband knew all about it, but couldn’t do anything about it cause he married me. Life was good and the bon bons were plentiful.
Then he took the RED PILL.
He suddenly realized I was not an HB10 and therefore not worthy of his devotion. Before I knew what was happening, he tried to get a divorce. He had found a MRA lawyer who managed to find a judge who wasn’t a mangina! The beta-turned alpha was very sneaky about this so I didn’t have a chance to get pregnant and keep the pregnancy to collect child support. Since their was no child, the judge refused to give me all of the husbands money- only 75% of it! At first I tried to find another beta to enslave, but I was 26 years old. Even the omegas turned their noses up at me! I was humiliated as the ex husband flaunted his studlyness in front of my face by sleeping with all the HB10 18 year olds he could find. I was pitiful – so pitiful I figured I might as well become a crazy cat lady.
So I got a CAT.
The cat was an elite member of the Furrinati, a Great Furred One. After making the requisite sacrifices of tuna, freeze dried chicken and catnip, the Furriness swatted at me- telling me to stop being such a little mangina. Was I not a woman? I could easily steal a CEO position of a multi billion dollar company with just a short skirt and a push up bra! Which I quickly did. There was still the ex husband though- what to do? Again I consulted the Cat who again gave excellent advice- accuse the bastard of rape. As the police took him away in handcuffs, the Cat contacted her Furry Underling- also known as a Dog- to ensure the judge would be Furrinati approved. The judge sentenced the male to 1000 years of jail and made him give me the rest of his money. The bon bons are once again plentiful as now I spend my days denying males access to anything but the most menial of jobs in my company (jobs that the women don’t want of course) and worshipping the Cat.
Moral of the Story: LONG LIVE THE FURRINATTI!!
Oh god I just realized that song is over a decade old now. WHAT THE HELL? Where did those years go?
Ok, I clicked on your name LBT and I’ve been enlightened. I’m sorry if I seem rude or stupid for asking that.
RE: Alice
What is a system member? How does someone’s soul get torn apart? I’m totally confused.
Brief explanation: I’m a member of a multiple system. Here’s more info!
Bah, ninjaed!
In case mine requires an explanation
This is probably one of the only sites on the internet in which the comments are just one of the best parts to read. I cannot read a post and not read the comments too… and laugh hysterically in the process.