Hello, and welcome to The Man Boobz Fiction Workshop! Today we will learn my foolproof two-step method for writing believable fiction. It’s as easy as pie — well, easier, since pie can take a bit of finesse — and it is absolutely GUARANTEED to work.
Here it is.
STEP ONE: Write believable fiction.
STEP TWO: If step one fails, write a story that makes a woman look evil and foolish, and post it to the Men’s Rights Subreddit as a true story.
If you don’t believe me, check out this little story from a fella calling himself the-final-word — a Redditor for less than two weeks, with only one previous comment to his name — in which a highly successful gentleman happily humiliates an ex-girlfriend trying to steal his money with the old “baby” ploy.
Take a look at the thread itself to see how eagerly the Men’s Righsers eat up his tale of victory over evil womanhood!
That is the beauty of my two-step method. If people don’t believe your bullshit, find a more gullible audience. And there are few audiences in this world more gullible than Men’s Rightsers.
I should note that I had nothing to do with the-final-word’s story, nor did I sneak into the Men’s Rights subreddit to give his story 47 upvotes and a bunch of positive comments.
Thanks to hackattack92 in the AgainstMensRights Subreddit for pointing out this wonderful example of shitthatneverhappened.txt
God damn. Even if that story has a shred of truth in it, what kind of person wants others to think that they raised their daughter to call their mother a crazy bitch?
As we say here on the Internets “Cool story bro.”
I especially like (not really) that his daughter is in the kitchen when this happens. Making him a sandwich, presumably.
I wrote a “true story” MRA-style once… Can’t find it now, but the sad thing is that it’s not that far off from the shit they seriously make up.
That wasn’t a test for gullibility at all!
The bit about the daughter in the kitchen, though, really adds that last bullshit flourish to his complete crap masterpiece.
Dude, are you sure you want to go with the confusing medical terminology? You could just say a wizard did it.
I think these made up MRA stories are my favorite part of this blog. They’re so hilarious and poorly written.
I’m up in the mountains! I’ll have to post pictures of the scenery, and the huge kitty and adorable doggie.
It’s like “and then everybody clapped for me.”
Doesn’t it though? That turned up the unbelievability up to 11.
I kind of expect Rodney Dangerfield to pop out and yell “Hey everybody, we’re all gonna get laid” and the dancing gopher to take over.
An MRA would probably be proud of that, actually.
Yeah I really have to wonder if these people care about anyone but themselves. Even if this story is true (which I don’t for a second believe it is), even if this guy is 100% infertile, and even if his girlfriend was cheating on him with her ex-boyfriend and her boss at the time the child was conceived, that guy is a complete dick. According to his story, she only came to him (begging and crying and apologising) because she couldn’t raise the child on her own. She’s desperate, and he manages to make it all about him.
Some people act like cheating is the worst crime ever, worse than leaving a child to be raised in poverty. And they seem to believe that men never cheat, ever. No that’s only women.
“what kind of person wants others to think that they raised their daughter to call their mother a crazy bitch?”
Actually people in the comments are saying that his daughter is awesome.
(The women with the baby is not her mother though).
That, and how he ~just happened~ to have a friend who kept up with the story and could provide more details to “prove” that she was just running a child-support con. That wasn’t overly convenient AT ALL.
*woman (I keep misspelling things dammit!)
Like, the daughter’s jargon is so age appropriate. Like, seriously.
It’s also awesome that the protagonist of this story dares to accuse the unwed mother (the villain) of f*cking her boss right in front of the toddler.
Except that isn’t awesome at all, imaginary made up MRA hero guy.
This story reminds of the time that I wanted to have sex with a “nice guy” in a totally hypergamous way, but then a PUA who treated me like total shit showed up and I was like, “Oh baby, please take me right now, because I gotta have the bad boy.” And then he was like, “Shut up, bitch,” and I totally wanted to do him even more.
Because that happens.
Did I ever tell you guys about the time I was trying to sperm-burgle an alpha when my beta boyfriend burst into the room (I was in his bedroom, obviously, because I always cheated on him in his own room) shouting “not on my watch?” He stole my turkey baster right out of my hands and sprayed hot sauce in it! Even worse, he testified on the alpha’s behalf when I falsely accused him of rape later — because I was embarrassed about the cheating, obvs.
Anyway I guess they’re like best friends now? The alpha took my ex under his wing and taught him Game, and now he’s a super hot alpha too. I keep begging for him to take me back now that he’s sexy, but he’s refused so many times that my womb shrivelled up and I went straight from 24 to 30 and no man will ever want me again because I’m old and wrinkly. ;_;
I quite like that he has to mention that the daughter is biologically his in order to make her an actor in this story.
Yech. Maybe it’s just me, but I was under the impression that just about any spontaneous infertility is something to be distrusted. I’ve heard too many cases of, “Dammit, I could’ve SWORN–”
Also, this is actually weirdly reminding us as how as a wee teenager, we actually gave our mom similar advice… but regarding friends, not exes. (She had at least one really awful friend, so awful that even we kids could notice.)
I love the daughter, it’s like she was lifted straight out of a disney show. I’m surprised she doesn’t come with a laugh-track
lol… You know, I wish there was a way to figure out which kind of story MRAs love more: A woman who evilly spermjacks a man, or a woman who evilly cockolds a man. I mean, either way, they certainly are willing to eat it up.
His numbers aren’t adding up. Why are he telling us all thes ages when they don’t add up?
He got a daughter in his early 20s, divorce the mother when his daughter is 6 and three years later he finds out he no longer can have more children. His daughter would then be 9. Fair enought. Ten years later his daughter is 19 and he says he was 27 when he found out he was sterilie, but then he would have had his daughter at 18. My lady math brain is hurting.
(why can’t they lie with statistic, that’s easier.
Or tell the truth)
This one time, at band camp, I got this really nice clarinet player drunk and had him give me oral but made him believe we did PiV. Once he was passed out drunk, the ALPHA drumline captain came in and screwed every single girl in the room at the same time, and every one of us got pregnant with his ALPHA babies and sued the clarinet player for child support so that he had to give up that scholarship and promising future to change diapers all day. He never even realized none of the kids were his, despite the fact that they bang on everything in sight! The ALPHA drumline captain went on to be a drug lord, and all of his kids eventually turned to drugs themselves. Which they hide in beta clarinet player’s backpack.
Oh, and we finally got a new marimba. It was about time.
/Just A Little Less Plausible Than That Story