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Don’t Be That Rape Apologist: Arthur Koestler, Judgy Bitch, and why MRAs hate rape awareness campaigns

Arthur Koestler: Brilliant writer, serial rapist?
Arthur Koestler: Brilliant writer, serial rapist?

Today I’m going to talk about Janet Bloomfield — AKA JudgyBitch — and her bizarre attack on the original Don’t Be That Guy anti-rape posters in Edmonton. But I’m going to take a bit of a detour first, so bear with me.

I recently picked up a copy of Arthur Koestler’s The Case of the Midwife Toad, a nonfiction account of a scientific feud that provided me with some diverting travel reading and put me in the mood to read more of Koestler’s nonfiction.

But doing some rudimentary Googling I made a rather horrifying discovery about Koestler, whom I’d admired since reading his bracing account of breaking with Communism in the classic The God That Failed anthology: according to a recent biographer, Koestler was a serial rapist and abuser of women.

While some doubt the evidence of rape, even his supporters have had to acknowledge, as one reviewer has written, that Koestler’s “treatment of the many women in his life [was] – even without the ‘rape’ – deeply unpleasant. He was manipulative, demanding, sexually voracious and utterly faithless.”

Koestler himself doesn’t exactly make a persuasive witness for his own defense, having once written to his second wife that “without an element of initial rape there is no delight.”

But in some ways as eye-opening as these revelations has been the response of some of Koestler’s defenders. Case in point: Michael Scammell, the author of a nearly 700-page biography of Koestler. After detailing many instances of Koestler’s mistreatment of women, he writes of the accusations of violent rape:

The exercise of male strength to gain sexual satisfaction wasn’t exactly uncommon at that time … The line between consensual and forced sex was often blurred.

Hey, it was the 1950s. EVERYBODY raped women back then.

The sad fact is that, while this is no defense of Koestler’s alleged behavior, there is an element of truth to Scammell’s claims. The line between consensual sex and rape was often blurred back then. Women were often cajoled, pressured, manipulated, and forced into sex by more physically powerful men. And neither party necessarily recognized what had happened as rape.

The fact that the line between consensual sex and rape is a lot clearer today — and that the rate of rape has declined markedly in the past several decades — is largely due to feminism. Feminism challenged older attitudes and definitions of rape and worked at changing these attitudes through education and awareness campaigns.

Feminist activists worked on teaching — and reteaching — both men and women what is and what isn’t acceptable sexual behavior.

It’s an ongoing process, which continues in awareness campaigns like this one, the Don’t Be That Guy campaign launched in Edmonton (and elsewhere):

posters1edmonton-police-re-launch-poster-campaign-to-deter-sexual-assault_posters

It’s pretty clear that there’s a lot more work to be done, as the reactions to this campaign have pretty clearly shown.

Anyone who has read much in the so-called manosphere — on MRA and PUA sites alike — will have noticed a lot of alarmist nonsense about the alleged difficulties men have in determining if a sex act with a woman is consensual or not, as if it is simply impossible, if there is any confusion, for men to open their mouths and ask. MRAs and PUAs act as if obtaining consent “the way feminists want it” would consist of some complicated legalistic procedure that would ruin sex forever.

This is patent nonsense. Clarifying issues of consent about (and during) sex — making anything that’s blurry clear — can be done in less time than it takes to read this sentence.

“Do you like this?” “Yes.”

“Do you want me to [incredibly dirty thing]?” “Yes.”

But, as I said, the MRAs and PUAs complaining about the alleged difficulties of consent don’t really seem to be interested in making things clear. They would, it seems, rather have things as blurry as possible.

And that’s because a lot of them want to return to a world in which, to paraphrase that quote from Scammell above, the exercise of male strength to gain sexual satisfaction isn’t exactly uncommon, and in which the line between consensual and forced sex is often blurred.

They would prefer to return to a world in which it’s considered fair game to “take advantage” of seriously drunk women. One in which all accusations of date rape could be dismissed as the result of a fickle woman changing her mind later.

And that, I think, is why MRAs have such a problem with date rape awareness campaigns like Edmonton’s Don’t Be That Guy campaign — which they try to both ridicule as unnecessary and denounce as an exercise in Nazi-style anti-male propaganda. Sometimes both at the same time.

Consider, for example, Janet Bloomfield/JudgyBitch’s recent A Voice for Men post on the Edmonton poster controversies. Bloomfield — who apparently likes to think of herself as one of those no-nonsense women who can get by just fine without any help from feminists, thank you very much — begins by trying to ridicule the original Don’t Be That Guy posters as simple-minded, obvious and utterly unnecessary.

Referring to several specific posters from the original campaign, she writes:

No, obviously, you should not be having sex with a woman so drunk she is passed out face down on the couch with her ass in the air. …

Obviously, helping a drunk woman home does not entitle you to sex.

And in what is going to come as SHOCKING news to everyone, if someone doesn’t want to have sex with you, you should not have sex with them.

I’ll give you a while to process that information, because I’m sure that until this clever campaign came along, you were all busy screwing comatose girls at parties and gleefully hailing cabs so you could help ladies home and then rape them.

That would be very witty and pointed but for the fact that, guess what, men do attempt to “have sex” with women who are passed out or asleep, and that there are plenty of men who seem to think that this counts as a sort of “no harm, no foul, no rape” situation.

Take a look at the discussion whenever this topic comes up on Reddit, for example. Or consider all those supporters of Julian Assange who pretend that the issue is women changing their mind after sex when in fact one of the things he’s been accused of is penetrating a woman sans condom while she was sleeping.

And as for “taking advantage” of seriously drunk women, well, there are plenty of men who think this is perfectly fine — and some who make this the centerpiece of their “seduction” technique. Indeed, one prominent PUA — Roosh V — has confessed to doing just that with one woman who was clearly too drunk to consent:

While walking to my place, I realized how drunk she was. In America, having sex with her would have been rape, since she legally couldn’t give her consent. It didn’t help matters that I was relatively sober, but I can’t say I cared or even hesitated. I won’t rationalize my actions, but having sex is what I do.

Somehow this confession — boast? —  hasn’t, to my knowledge, earned him any condemnations from manosphere or MRA bloggers, or even, it seems, cost him any fans.

Meanwhile, on the very site Bloomfield is publishing her post, Paul Elam blames drunk women for being sexually assaulted, writing (as I pointed out yesterday) that women who drink with men are, “freaking begging” to be raped,

Damn near demanding it. … walk[ing] though life with the equivalent of a I’M A STUPID, CONNIVING BITCH – PLEASE RAPE ME neon sign glowing above their empty little narcissistic heads.

After dismissing the Don’t Be That Guy campaign as so much silliness,  Bloomfield makes a sudden 180 degree turn and declares it the virtual equivalent of Nazi propaganda against Jews.

Which would be offensive if it weren’t so manifestly absurd. The Don’t Be That Guy campaign isn’t directed at men, per se. It’s directed at men WHO THINK IT’S OK TO RAPE WOMEN and/or MEN WHO MAKE EXCUSES FOR RAPISTS.

A good number of these men — and some women with similar beliefs — seem to spend much of their time reading and/or writing for manosphere sites like Roosh V’s blog and A Voice for Men.

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hellkell
hellkell
11 years ago

You young naive girls need to listen to older women and take our advice and stop listening to feminists and lesbians who believe they can legislate human nature because it’s not going to happen.

From one old bag to another, fuck right off.

Anyone else think “Marie” is not a woman? I don’t know many women who use the term “females” so much. Douchebag MRAs who write they way they think women talk, however…

Marie
Marie
11 years ago

.

Ally S
11 years ago

@terrible Marie

However, if a female goes out and gets blind drunk under the law that is voluntary intoxication which means that you caused the risk and must suffer from any results. Bad luck and learn from your stupidity.That’s the law and you will not change it because it would open too many possibilities to break the law. Every one arrested for DWI or running up a million dollar credit card bill or committing some crime would use the defence that they were always drunk and not aware of what they were doing. So voluntary intoxication is not going to change just for alleged rape. Besides, most females who drink are sexually inhibited and repressed and drink so they have the nerve to get laid which is what they really want.That has been my experience and perhaps some of you should get out of the house occasionally and observe how normal people behave.

Consent to the risk of something happening =/= consent to that thing happening. Moreover, it’s the fucking rapist’s fault for raping, not the person who is unable to consent as a result of being too intoxicated.

And fuck off with your blanket assumption about women who drink, which is just blatant misogyny and victim-blaming. Moreover, to blindly assume consent is to be – guess what – a fucking rape apologist.

And btw, we communicate nonverbally and when it comes to something like sex we’re not too different from a baboon. Don’t drink with men and then go home with them at 3am because that is a consent to sex. Why else would he be taking you home? To have a game of backgammon? lol

That is consent to sex to a rapist, you asshole. Moreover, consent to going to a man’s home doesn’t necessarily imply consent to sex. You keep bringing up the bullshit notion of implied consent, which is just a tool rapists and their supporters use to maintain their shitty worldview.

You young naive girls need to listen to older women and take our advice and stop listening to feminists and lesbians who believe they can legislate human nature because it’s not going to happen.

None of us want to legislate human nature, and the fact that you think this is the case shows how ignorant you are regarding this topic. Go away.

Marie
Marie
11 years ago

LBY0 if you need specialised then you should ask my boyfriend FR Pell who is qualified as a medical doctor and attorney.
And as he always says “An Honest Woman Cannot Be Raped”

Honest women don’t expose themselves to risks like tarting themselves up, getting drunk and doing the hoochie coochie to attract men. That’s a slut not an honest woman.
You want to drink then invite some of the girls home and do it there.

Brz
Brz
11 years ago

It would a pleasure to share some intimacy with a big saguaro, LBT, but as there is no way to ensure its enthusiastic consent I’ll try to refrain myself because I don’t want to err on the side of rape.

Ally S
11 years ago

“my boyfriend FR Pell”

Should’ve seen it coming.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

“It has never been legal to kill an infant”

Pedantic moment, but it totally was in Ancient Greece and Rome. You know, two thousand years ago. It is, if course, utter illegal and beyond the pale now. And has been for quite awhile.

“42+wks is cause for concern”

*bows* (I was due the fourth, my birthday’s a week from yesterday…and I will probably be here and drunk if anyone feels like joining me!)

/last page — so not caught up

Oh! LBT if that long dash works, I did space dash dash space (obviously all slammed together) and I think you can use &em; but let’s test that — &em;

Shadow
Shadow
11 years ago

That’s the law and you will not change it because it would open too many possibilities to break the law. Every one arrested for DWI or running up a million dollar credit card bill or committing some crime would use the defence that they were always drunk and not aware of what they were doing. So voluntary intoxication is not going to change just for alleged rape.

Oh Doctor, perhaps sometime between your next PhDs you could learn the difference between doing something and having something done to you. Ta.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

Clearly not. One more test and then I finish catching up — &emdash; &emdash;

becausescience
becausescience
11 years ago

Don’t drink with men and then go home with them at 3am because that is a consent to sex.

No it isn’t.

LBT
LBT
11 years ago

RE: Pell

Oh cocksucking ass, I should’ve known it was you, you wretched child. You’d like to think that, wouldn’t you?

“Honest people can’t be raped.” How endearing. Go fuck that saguaro, infant, it’s waiting for you.

RE: Brz

Oh please. Like you’ve shown any sign of caring about THAT in the past.

Fibinachi
11 years ago

@Brz

That’s actually good point. Have you tried vaguely reading body language and blandly assuming that the curve lines of your average saguaro were evolutionary designed to invite male eyes and thus, therefore, to wit, so on, indeed, adjourn, your gentle ministrations must be utterly a-okay?

q:

Hey, Brz, did you ever get around to answering why you think taking care not to insult is the same as governmental censure?

katz
11 years ago

You’re fucking kidding me. Not another Pell, and this one when I’m in the middle of stuff. Someone remind me later to update the Book of Pell.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

“Anyone else think “Marie” is not a woman? I don’t know many women who use the term “females” so much.”

Now, if I’d caught up before posting, I could’ve noted the smell of Pell before the outing. Damnit!

And for fuck sake, it’s — — (or it damned well better be)

SittieKitty
11 years ago

Is it dashdashdash, — ?

Wait, I thought the opposite of honest was dishonest, not slut. Am I missing something?

Marie, please, go answer all my questions. Otherwise fuck off. tia.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

The dark lord has been alerted to the Pell sighting.

LBT
LBT
11 years ago

Goddammit, I should’ve KNOWN not to hang on this post. I knew a troll would show up and then I’d get angry. *sigh*

A little context for the commenters who may not know: I come from a family where pedophilia was a thing. A BIG thing. A thing that nobody ever talked about, but everybody made allowances for. There were relatives that I was never to be with alone, though nobody actually TOLD me about this or outright WARNED me until I was in high school, and had something actually happened to me, I’m sure it would’ve been covered up. Because it was a secret. The primary perpetrator was a veteran of at least two wars, the Noble Generation, and that child molester got a goddamned twenty-gun salute when he finally withered up and died. I’m a goddamned atheist, but I almost wish a hell existed so that fucker who hurt my mother, and my uncle, and probably a couple other of my relatives that I don’t know for sure about, could burn there.

They were CHILDREN. They were completely dependent on him. And he molested them, and at least one of them molested somebody else when HE grew up.

So hearing this shit, hearing Pell laugh about these little things, like he’s being so fucking clever, like he’s being so cute with his little troll tactics, when IT’S MY FUCKING FAMILY, my mom and my uncle and me and probably at least two of my other aunts and maybe my other uncle and I’m afraid to tell/ask my brother because maybe he wasn’t as lucky as me, it INFURIATES me. And he thinks it’s just so fucking cute and funny.

You’re a shit, Pell. And yet I STILL hope you never get raped, even if it gave you some fucking insight.

SittieKitty
11 years ago

Ok, short dash – :Type dash.
Long dash — :Type dashdashdash

becausescience
becausescience
11 years ago

Every one arrested for DWI or running up a million dollar credit card bill or committing some crime would use the defence that they were always drunk and not aware of what they were doing.

Being raped is not a crime. Being intoxicated does not absolve people of responsibility for sexually assaulting someone.

LBT
LBT
11 years ago

RE: Argenti

Marie is just Pell again, whacking off before his mommy puts him to bed.

Pam
Pam
11 years ago

my boyfriend FR Pell

What does the FR stand for, Fucking Rapist?

Tracy
Tracy
11 years ago

@SittieKittie thank you for the explanation – that was awesome.

Marie was quite whiffy,
she had a bad smell –
quelle fucking surprise,
she turned out to be Pell.

Ho hum, asswipe.

sarahlizhousespouse
11 years ago

@katz
How many manifestations of misogyny has Pell assumed?

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

So we’re guessing that Marie is a. a dude and b. about 16, right?

Also, dude – paragraph breaks, they’re a thing. See that key on the right side of your keyboard that says “Enter”? Use it.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

Ah, should have read the rest of the comments.

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