When I bring up the subject of cats on this blog, as I so often do, it’s party because, well, I’m a bit of a fan. But it’s also because I know it confuses and irritates the misogynists who read this blog, inveterate cat-haters all (or almost all). I’ve never quite understood the depth of the animosity the guys in the manosphere seem to have towards cats.
But now one of these cat haters has provided us with a theoretical explanation for his catphobia. In a post with the suggestive title “Limp-Wristed Cat Lovers, Beautiful Dog Lovers,” the guy behind the PUA blog LaidInNYC explains why real men — and real women — hate cats and love dogs instead.
Dogs are loyal, obedient, and affectionate.
Masculine men love these qualities in our companions, and they are qualities we want in our women as well.
Cats are selfish, independent, and alpha.
Masculine men hate these qualities in our companions. This is because masculine men are the owners, not the owned.
Huh. It’s weird how these descriptions of “alpha males” often read like confessions of massive insecurity. So “masculine men” are so insecure they can’t stand being challenged even by their pets? They’re so threatened by the independence of other creatures that they can’t tolerate a pet that might sometimes wander off into another room to take a nap?
But according to Mr. LaidInNYC, it’s the cat-loving dudes who are the sissies:
95% of men who love cats are either gay or have sub fantasies*. If you like cats, you like not being in control.
Well, all except for a small-percentage of super-alpha dudes who are so manly they can tame even the mighty housecat:
There are a small percentage of straight alpha seducers that like to own cats. The reason is they love dominating an already dominant living thing. They like to stare down and dominate their cats just because they can.
Welcome to my world.
Well, ok, sometimes the cats stare me down.
But what about the women? If masculine men love dogs, shouldn’t feminine women love cats? Then why do manosphere dudes so regularly hurl abuse on women with cats?
Well, LaidInNYC has an answer for that: it turns out that truly feminine women actually prefer dogs to cats, but for a totally different reason than men.
While men love the loyalty and obedience, girls are much more likely to coo over a dogs unconditional love, furry cuddles, and “look how cute he looks when he does that thing with his paw” type stuff.
Feminine girls love their dogs but they don’t enjoy training them, letting them run in an open field and feeling pride when the dog comes right back when called, punishing them when necessary, etc. …
Most of the feminine dog lovers I know already have strong male dominance types in their life, be it a strong father, boyfriend, or husband, and they just like the dog as another source of love. … cats are superfluous when you have a man to obey.
It’s a different story indeed for “the masculine, ugly, old, short-haired, barren feminists who end up being cat ladies.”
Ugly masculine girls, on the other hand, cannot find a male to dominate them in their social life because they lack the beauty. Since being dominated by a strong independent entity who doesn’t need her is so important to a woman, she must seek out that domination. Ugly girls find this in either a career, feminism, cats, or some combination of the three.
A job, a cat, some feminism: the holy trinity of MISANDRY.
I’m not not exactly sure how any of these things “dominate” women, but since Mr. LaidInNYC doesn’t actually seem to know anything about anything, I guess I’ll let that one slide.
In the meantime, I would like to treat you all to pictures of some of the evil independent creatures that make alpha males tremble in fear:
Yeah, the “Feminine girls don’t enjoy punishing them when necessary,” was creepy. Who would enjoy punishing a pet?
Mayimoktoo, my boyfriend loves cats(he likes all furry things), and he said it might be because I approach them like birds(I have birds as pets).
Birds like to be approached directly and calmly. If you are too direct you’ll look like you’re saying “gtfo of my territory”. If you aren’t direct enough, you’ll look like you’re trying to sneak up on them to eat them. Or they’ll think you’re scared of them, and then the bird will intentionally bite and act weird because they think your reactions of fear are hilarious. (They don’t mean to be assholes btw, they just interpret “ouch!” and surprise as you trying to entertain them. Birds who are hurt by another will sulk and shun, not jump and scream at their attacker).
I’m not sure if I’m supposed to do that with cats. With birds I generally greet by talking in a happy tone, and if its ok with that, I’ll show it my hand. If the bird is OK with me then it will lick my hand(not for taste, but to see what I feel like. Birds beaks are like their hand). Then if it bows its head that means “cuddles, please”.
Then the next time I see the bird I can just show my hand and it will know I want to pet it.
Actually, toxoplasmosis is a bad thing a) if you’ve never had it and b) if you have a weakened immune system/if you are pregnant (can harm the fetus)
The thing is, once you’ve had it, you’re immune to it, and it doesn’t cause any more problems. And like 90% of people in NA have been exposed to it and are immune, where Europe has a lower rate (60%(?) or so, not entirely sure, would have to go look at my notes) and it can be more of a concern for pregnant women.
But it’s really not a big deal, it’s like influenza, only a lot less dangerous… and no one tells you to stay indoors and avoid everyone who has the flu during the winter months…
Cats that come into contact with rodents are more likely to be exposed to toxoplasmosis — that’s how they generally contract it, and then humans contract it by coming into contact with the infected cat’s feces. You can limit your exposure to that, and your cat’s exposure to all kinds of other parasites, by keeping your cats indoors only.
Joe: you’re wrong as usual. Fuck off and have a nice day.
Joe, do you try to be unpleasant all the time? Because it seems that way.
http://news.sciencemag.org/sciencenow/2012/08/scienceshot-cats-dont-cause-canc.html
But there was an article I read yesterday that cats carry TB. So yeah, keep ’em indoors, and be vaccinated.
Furrinati at work:
http://media-cache-ec2.pinimg.com/736x/e7/43/00/e74300ffd769b912ce125870babf8d35.jpg
Apparently there was no legos around:
http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/3d/b6/85/3db685faac09ebcc90b4c32b4e70fd8a.jpg
Obedient dog:
http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/10/e7/33/10e7334c6094a2b415614c91866ccae2.jpg
PUD (Pick up Dog)
http://media-cache-ec3.pinimg.com/736x/17/81/a7/1781a72e43f54f142a4b67aa9f734ecf.jpg
“Limp-wristed”
Am I the only one who really fucking hates hearing that? It reminds me of that fundamentalist Christian guy who advocated physically abusing young boys for having “limp wrists” because that’s a sign of being gay.
It sounds awful to me just because of that association.
RE: Ally S
I get annoyed at it, though I lack that association. I mostly just associate it with sneering condescension. Like the world will detonate because some men don’t act like Megazords, with arms too stiff to do more than the slightest bending.
BUT WHAT ABOUT THE HORSE PEOPLE? What does that say about my gender identity? I must know, Internet stranger! I must know!
My beloved didn’t grow up with pets, as he is allergic to both cats and dogs. We now have three cats (I had two when we got together). He’s fine, now, as long as he doesn’t rub his eyes right after petting them. Other people’s pets still make his face and eyes pink. We visited a dog once that licked him, and he got nasty red welts on his arm where the spit was.
Every time that “cats are aloof / suspicious” trope appears, on television or something, he laughs. “Have they ever been around a cat?”. “I don’t know, sweetie.” Same for “cats are so independent!”. Our cats freak out / sulk if we (or just one of us) go away for any significant length of time.
I have never had a cat that wasn’t cuddle-demanding, except one I took care of from her age 10 to 12 that had been mistreated and was sick.
I enjoyed dogs in the past. But with my physical issues, I can’t really be around dogs that jump up or put their paws on you.
You know what I love most about my cats?
It’s actually a long list, but I will sum it up as short as possible.
They’re indoor-outdoor cats who like to take care of themselves and hang out outside when I’m not home.
When I get home they come running to greet me, and will sit beside me, at my feet, while I watch TV, happy to just hang out with me.
When they feel affectionate they will climb right up into my lap to be petted.
I’ve never had a cat who didn’t enjoy hanging out with me. I have one who is a little stand-offish right now–she only comes up for short petting sessions, and then it’s back to my feet to hang out.
They love to go for walks with me.
What I am saying is my cats are my babies, and, y’know, fuck anybody who devalues that relationship.
It’s all about insecurity of such a level that they hate or fear other living beings for simply not being them. I wouldn’t bet a penny on them actually loving their dogs – imagine how they’d react to dogs who aren’t obedient, or who are very dominant or simply independent themselves.
Wonder how these morons would process the fact of someone with a very dominant personality, and genuinely powerful on the international scene – ie. Cardinal Richelieu – who also loved cats, and had some fourteen of them? (He still does, of course, though I don’t know how many of the Furrinati he has these days, I’ve never asked.)
Meanwhile, another person who loves cats AND dogs AND other people, two-legged or four.
What’s the deal with limp wrist? Where does it come from, does anyone know? Because wrists have a joint, so they move, and muscles and tendons, so they can resist movement…
I know, they’d think the dogs were misbehaving at them, just like they think women wear clothes or have sex with other people at them.
It’s really not uncommon among dog people, unfortunately… Like, some dogs love to chase other animals, and you have to teach them not to, both for the sake of these other animals and for the sake of the dogs themselves so they don’t get run over by cars and stuff while on a chase. But dogs do this because they think it’s super fun. They don’t chase animals at their owner. And yet many people will think dogs do this because they “challenge their leadership” or some such nonsense. The very same people will think virtually anything a dog does that displeases them is something zie does in order to “challenge their leadership”.
Just like MRA:s think women do everything they do in order to oppress men.
Heheh, Maddie’s slow-blink eyes tend to mean “Yes I know you’re talking, human, but I don’t think much of what you’re saying” – like when we point out to her that she does in fact have food in her bowl and isn’t starving, or there’s a choice of four beds beside the one she insists is the only acceptable one.
@Sittiekitty: I think it’s because there’s a stereotypical handmovement, a little wave, associated with gay men. Idk if it’s ever been used by real gay men as a way to, say, recognize each other discreetly or something, but it’s certainly been used a lot by actors playing gay in comedy shows and the like.
When I still had a cat living with me, they actually made me feel less lonely, especially when I was a little kid. Whenever I was practically left alone in the house, I would hang out with the cat. I’d let him watch me build stuff out of Legos, sit down next to him trying to hear him purr while petting his head and scruffing his chin, giving him scraps of food, and so on.
I have a lot of fond memories of that cat. He was fun to play with, and even though he was capable of being just as grouchy as many other cats, he was also very affectionate with me.
What is limp wristed? I can’t picture it as “feminine” or “gay”, it just sounds like an injury…
“What’s the deal with limp wrist? Where does it come from, does anyone know? Because wrists have a joint, so they move, and muscles and tendons, so they can resist movement…”
Because it’s seen as a sign of femininity, and gay men are perceived as feminine.
I like the comments on that blog post. There’s a guy who has his own theory about how having cats is either MEGA ALPHA (his capitals) or OMEGA. Naturally he’s the first one.
I had a cat, who would let my hamster run all over it and make a little bed in its fur and sleep on it. I suspect rodents are most alpha of all.
I love cats and dogs. I’ve had one or the other or both pretty much my entire life. I will say that cats are often slightly easier to care for, and many cats can be left alone for a couple of days with plenty of food, water, and a clean litter box, while dogs often can’t.
But I’ve had a cat who thought he was a dog and a dog who thought he was a cat; I’ve had outgoing cats and dogs, shy cats and dogs, obedient and not-so-obedient cats and dogs. I’ve watched the pet hierarchy change as older pets died, as we acquired new pets, as young pets matured. I’ve watched the older pets teach the younger pets (of both species). I’ve never had to actually train my dogs – the older dog and/or cats taught them all they needed to know (commands like sit and stay were never necessary – commands like “don’t do that”, “find mom”, “ride”, “out”, “treat” and “go to bed” were sufficient). I lived next to a busy highway, and never lost a single pet to a vehicle.
Cats and dogs come in as many varieties of personality as people.
Also, here are some famous and manly men who loved cats: Marlon Brando, Clark Gable, James Dean, Morgan Freeman, Ernest Hemingway, John Travolta, Mark Twain, Sean Connery, Jack Kerouac, Glenn Danzig, all the Beatles except Ringo, Nicolas Cage, James Franco, and George Clooney.
Have some pics of famous people, male and female, with cats:
http://acidcow.com/famous/7629-famous-people-and-their-cats-67-pics.html
And I found a whole blog dedicated to men who love cats, which also has a little section of famous men who love kitties:
http://www.menandcats.com/?cat=11&paged=2
Someone who thinks that part of the pleasure of having a dog is “punishing them when necessary” shouldn’t be allowed a dog or any other pet and probably shouldn’t be allowed around children either.
I prefer cats to dogs a little bit. I always thought that was because I grew up with my awesome cat Simba who was pretty independent and wouldn’t come for pets very often but he always liked to come and sleep on the chair beside me and sometimes steal mine if it looked more comfortable. Now I know that I really just have an innate desire to have a sleepy cat dominate me by jumping in behind me if I leaned too far forward and snuggling into my back.