When I bring up the subject of cats on this blog, as I so often do, it’s party because, well, I’m a bit of a fan. But it’s also because I know it confuses and irritates the misogynists who read this blog, inveterate cat-haters all (or almost all). I’ve never quite understood the depth of the animosity the guys in the manosphere seem to have towards cats.
But now one of these cat haters has provided us with a theoretical explanation for his catphobia. In a post with the suggestive title “Limp-Wristed Cat Lovers, Beautiful Dog Lovers,” the guy behind the PUA blog LaidInNYC explains why real men — and real women — hate cats and love dogs instead.
Dogs are loyal, obedient, and affectionate.
Masculine men love these qualities in our companions, and they are qualities we want in our women as well.
Cats are selfish, independent, and alpha.
Masculine men hate these qualities in our companions. This is because masculine men are the owners, not the owned.
Huh. It’s weird how these descriptions of “alpha males” often read like confessions of massive insecurity. So “masculine men” are so insecure they can’t stand being challenged even by their pets? They’re so threatened by the independence of other creatures that they can’t tolerate a pet that might sometimes wander off into another room to take a nap?
But according to Mr. LaidInNYC, it’s the cat-loving dudes who are the sissies:
95% of men who love cats are either gay or have sub fantasies*. If you like cats, you like not being in control.
Well, all except for a small-percentage of super-alpha dudes who are so manly they can tame even the mighty housecat:
There are a small percentage of straight alpha seducers that like to own cats. The reason is they love dominating an already dominant living thing. They like to stare down and dominate their cats just because they can.
Welcome to my world.
Well, ok, sometimes the cats stare me down.
But what about the women? If masculine men love dogs, shouldn’t feminine women love cats? Then why do manosphere dudes so regularly hurl abuse on women with cats?
Well, LaidInNYC has an answer for that: it turns out that truly feminine women actually prefer dogs to cats, but for a totally different reason than men.
While men love the loyalty and obedience, girls are much more likely to coo over a dogs unconditional love, furry cuddles, and “look how cute he looks when he does that thing with his paw” type stuff.
Feminine girls love their dogs but they don’t enjoy training them, letting them run in an open field and feeling pride when the dog comes right back when called, punishing them when necessary, etc. …
Most of the feminine dog lovers I know already have strong male dominance types in their life, be it a strong father, boyfriend, or husband, and they just like the dog as another source of love. … cats are superfluous when you have a man to obey.
It’s a different story indeed for “the masculine, ugly, old, short-haired, barren feminists who end up being cat ladies.”
Ugly masculine girls, on the other hand, cannot find a male to dominate them in their social life because they lack the beauty. Since being dominated by a strong independent entity who doesn’t need her is so important to a woman, she must seek out that domination. Ugly girls find this in either a career, feminism, cats, or some combination of the three.
A job, a cat, some feminism: the holy trinity of MISANDRY.
I’m not not exactly sure how any of these things “dominate” women, but since Mr. LaidInNYC doesn’t actually seem to know anything about anything, I guess I’ll let that one slide.
In the meantime, I would like to treat you all to pictures of some of the evil independent creatures that make alpha males tremble in fear:
I’ve always been struck by the similarities between dog whisperer BS and PUA BS. It’s like they’re reading the same BS evo-pop-psych and just using “women” and “dogs” interchangeably.
It all comes down to lack of empathy. Neither group can grok what another being might be thinking or feeling, so they project fantasies of control and dominance onto them.
And personally, while I’ve lived with both dogs and cats (at the same time, even!), I’ve always had a soft spot for budgies.
@Nitram: Exactly. Plus it’s weird that the supposedly fun part of letting a dog run in an open field and coming when you call it is DA DOMINANCE. I think it’s great to have a dog that reliably comes when zie’s called, but that’s because this means the dog can be given the freedom to run around and play unleashed, while a disobedient dog has to be leashed for its own protection (so that zie’s not run over by a car while chasing a deer, for instance). It’s fun to have a fairly obedient dog for that reason, not because OMG DA DOMINANCE I’LL CREAM IN MY PANTS NOW!
I think this is one reason I prefer dogs actually… With cats, zie’s either an indoor cat, and although I don’t think indoor cats generally have bad lives it still seems a bit boring for the animal never to leave the apartment/house, or else zie’s an outdoor cat who can come and go as zie pleases through a kitty door, but then you constantly have to worry about something happening to zir. I grew up with outdoor cats; it did happen that they got run over by cars, and one cat just disappeared and we never find out what happened to him.
I like that you can take dogs out for walks, play with them outdoors and have all kinds of fun activities together with them without having to worry about them the way you do with an outdoor cat.
QFTW!!!!
Mad alpha cat skills.
Suppose I could embed it actually:
I also want to know how my neighbor would fit in with these pet stereotypes. He is elderly and has all sorts of tough life experiences. I would describe him as grizzled and badass. He also has a toy poodle dog and carries her around everywhere. I have never seen a more spoiled animal in all my life. His wife thinks it’s funny how that dog has him wrapped around her paws. So would he be alpha? Or would his princess doggy make him beta?
I just re read my last comment and it sounds a bit like I am saying that there is no difference between cats and dogs or that people shouldn’t have a preference, which clearly isn’t true, I just meant I don’t see them as ‘dogs mindlessly worship owners and are needy’ and ‘cats don’t need or care about people and are independant’ and one or the other is somehow superior for whatever reason. Run on sentence over!
I wish cats liked me. They all seem to hate me, I’m not sure why. I’ve never had a cat so I’m probably messing up some body language or something.
I don’t mean to threadjack, but if any of you are in the Austin, TX area, the capitol is getting nuts. Lifers arranged busses to arrive at the capitol starting at 11, and Dewhurst allowed registration for testimony to open early so they can flood out pro-choice voices. If you can get to the capitol at all today, do it. I’m packing my bag now and will be going in a bit.
/end interrupt
I do like this show — I think this guy seems like he’s pretty good at dealing with feline behavior, unlike the problematic style of the Dog Whisperer guy.
http://animal.discovery.com/tv-shows/my-cat-from-hell
Btw, I wonder how he account for the fact that most dog sports (like obedience, agility, tracking, searching, protection etc) are dominated by women? Hard to explain if women who love dogs aren’t interested in actually training them. Does he think these dogs read the instruction books and teach themselves how to perform the programs?
As I was going through the process of deciding to divorce, I joked that I would replace him with a cat and consider it an upgrade. I did and it was.
@dvarghundspossen – “desperately trying to please someone who bullies you is a survival technique…” Your words came at just the right time for some issues I’m working through. A much needed insight. Thank you.
@ Bob Goblin
“I don’t hate dogs, I enjoy them. I started my redpill training watching Cesar Millan”
That is in one of the comments on the article! Hahaha eww. Just no.
When men have dogs it’s for smart, strong, manly reasons, whereas when women have dogs it’s for stupid, weak, girly reasons with cooties.
It reminds me of a bit in misogynist cartoonist Dave Sim’s anti-lady rant “Reads,” where he explains that men like “Peanuts” because they appreciate its sophisticated writing and philosophy and characters, whereas women just like it because they think Snoopy is cute. Apparently this was how Sim rationalized being into the same comic strip as a bunch of dumb girls.
Here’s my husband being dominated by a powerful alpha:
http://tikiweekend.files.wordpress.com/2013/02/tiki56-4.jpg
He prolly thinks the women cheat and get their men to train the dogs for them, or that it’s men telling women to do it. I’m inclined to think the former because then he can say that women are low down dirty cheaters and submissive
Bob goblin, I love budgies! My budgie loves to talk to my nose. She is very intense when she talks to it too, her gestures and tone of voice make her sound like a parakeet version of Malcolm X.
She follows me around the house and gives me speeches. Except about the importance of CHEEPCHEEEPRRRRUGHFYFJFJYFJGFJYFYUCHIRPCHIRP instead of ending racism.
I can’t own a cat for two reasons, I’m allergic, and they seem to enjoy hunting my shoes or socks while I’m wearing them. But yeah, I love cats and dogs, but unfortunately cats make my eyes very itchy so that leaves me with only the one option.
I like both dogs and cats. I like dogs a little better because you can train them to do cool things, you can have them act as guards or save people from burning buildings or pull sleds hundreds of miles across Siberia or do athletics and obedience competitions. I kind of want a Doberman or German Shepard but my parents won’t let me. Cats on the other hand are adorable and fluffy and I can relate to many of their qualities. I like petting them and hanging out with them but I don’t think they’d make a good pet for me.
I’m always the person that doesn’t exist according to MRAs…
Chie–I watched a few of those shows. It all seemed to boil down to, “Your cat is acting like a (stressed-out, unhappy) cat. Here’s a way to get your cat to start acting like a (calm, friendly, playful) cat.” Which often involves putting up shelving.
For dogs, I’ve seen a few of “It’s me or the Dog”, which has a much less “dominance” focused training style. Victoria treats the problem as coming from the owner, and usually ends up focussing on having the people spend more time with the dog doing activities/training and on positive reinforcement.
I’ve kind of been wanting a giant snail. They’re so chill. They like to “cuddle” unless your skin is sweaty, since… the salt and stuff.
I’m gonna elaborate a bit on the similarities: You have various dog gurus who physically force dogs to do as they please, for instance, by putting a choke collar right behind the dog’s ears, meaning you can strangle zir any time with just a short yank at the collar, and the dog is helpless to do anything about it (when the choke collar is placed lower on the throat the dog can somewhat defend zirself against strangulation by tensing zir neck muscles, but with the choke right behind the ears zie’s helpless). Then the dog guru uses this to punish unwanted behaviours until the dog doesn’t dare do anything that might render zir momentarily strangled, and zie becomes passive and obedient.
And the dog guru will say that the dog is now passive and obedient, not because she’s become intimidated by the human being who controls zir breathing, but because zie recognizes the human as leader!
Compare this creepy Kickstarter guy who suggested physically forcing women to touch his penis and stuff, and then suggesting that if the woman lets him have his way with her, it’s not because she’s become intimidated, but because she recognizes him as a leader!
It’s really exactly the same kind of reasoning. Scare, threaten and physically force someone to do your bidding, then argue that you got your way with zir because of your mad leader skills.
@reginaldgriswald
I’m in Houston, but I’ll be thinking of you and hoping! Much love from me!
@Laserqueen: Internet hugs!
http://fc01.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2010/082/a/0/My_Baby_Budgies_by_raptiye.jpg
Note: those are not my budgies, just a cute pic I found.