Categories
advocacy of violence alpha males creepy domestic violence douchebaggery evo psych fairy tales grandiosity heartiste men who should not ever be with women ever misogyny PUA racism

Heartiste: Men need to be able to hit their mates in order to “retain” them

A better way to retain your mate: Be a sharp-dressed man.
A better way to retain your mate: Be a sharp-dressed man.

You may know Heartiste as a reactionary, misogynistic, proudly racist dispenser of manipulative, sometimes abusive dating advice to would-be “alpha males.”

Did you also know that he was an open advocate of domestic violence against women?

Well, I didn’t, until a friend pointed out a strange little exchange on his Twitter account the other day.

Last Tuesday morning, apropos of nothing in particular, Heartiste made the following pronouncement:

When someone asked what sort of threats he meant, he elaborated:

The latter three items on the list (“Abandonment. Shame. Ostracism”) are standard techniques in Heartiste’s dating strategy, but the open advocacy of violence is, I think, new.

In addition to being repugnant, Heartiste’s argument here doesn’t even particularly make sense. Essentially, he seems to be saying that men need to be able to hit women to keep them in line so that they won’t have to … hit women to keep them in line.

Also, the phrase “mate retention strategy,” apparently popular with Evo Psych types, gives me the creeps. I’m pretty sure the best “mate retention strategy” is to be the sort of person your “mate” wants to be in a relationship with.

I did a quick search for the phrase, and found numerous references to two academic studies. One suggested that some women fake orgasms as a “mate retention strategy.” Another possibly more revealing one claimed that men of “low mate value” often insult their mates to lower their self-esteem so they won’t feel confident enough to leave. That seems more or less in line with what Heartiste’s general approach. And certainly, by any reasonable definition of the term, Heartiste and his followers are some pretty “low value” people, both as “mates” and as decent human beings generally.

I also found this reference to research by Evo Psych big daddy David Buss suggesting that violence — surprise! — isn’t actually a particularly effective “mate retention strategy.”

Also, beating up your mate is, you know, just generally a pretty shitty thing to do.

If Heartiste takes his tweets down, I’ve got screenshots.

EDITED TO ADD: Heartiste has really been going wild with the Twitter lately.

Here he claims to have invented the term “hivemind.”

After I pointed out that this belief was delusional, he suggested that I kill myself. Very alpha!

He’s also been on a bit of a racist rampage, posting lots of stuff like this:

See also here, here, here, here, and here.

Phrasing your racism in pseudoscientific terms doesn’t make it right, dude. It just makes you a pretentious racist.

803 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Greg Wright
Greg Wright
11 years ago

@Briz.

I have a right to defend myself.

Marie
11 years ago

@Greg

Marie, if a man is demoralizing you, go pepper spray his face or hit him with a stun gun.

You won’t get a peep out of me if I saw you doing that to a dude if he was cat calling you.

I can’t stand guys who do that crap.

Um, I can’t stand them either, but that doesn’t mean I want to attack them O_o ::judging you:: I just want them to stop fucking doing it

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

Marie, go get yourself arrested. Be sure to inform the cops that Greg is your attorney.

hellkell
hellkell
11 years ago

Greg, you aren’t talking about self-defense.

Fade
Fade
11 years ago

False rape is a huge problem, because some people in both genders use it as a “come up” to get quick money. Take notice that I said in both genders, because males do it too.

And, how is false rape a huge problem when rape is not even treated seriously? I mean, people normally start slut-shaming and victim-blaming in every rape trial, or worse, bemoaning the rapists’ bright future being lost, WHEN THERE IS VIDEO EVIDENCE. When there is NO evidence (assuming this is a false accusation case), how do you think that would happen?

I’m not saying no one falsely accuses rape (though IIRC most of the time the “false accusations” are the case of a mistaken identity). I’m saying THE RATE OF FALSE ACCUSATIONS IS PROBABLY THE SAME (or less) THAN FALSE REPORTS OF ANY OTHER CRIME AND IT IS NOT A HUGE PROBLEM.

Briznecko
Briznecko
11 years ago

Of course, the perfect reaction to a slap is “knocking someone out”! That’s not an overraction AT ALL.

Marie
11 years ago

@CassandraSays

Marie, go get yourself arrested. Be sure to inform the cops that Greg is your attorney.

Will do* XD

*note: will not actually do.

Briznecko
Briznecko
11 years ago

/sarcasm, obvs

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

Greg has now moved past juggling the goalposts into bending them with his mind like Uri Geller.

Marie
11 years ago

@Briznecko

It was probably clearly sarcasm to everyone except Greg, not that a clarification hurts.

Fade
Fade
11 years ago

@CassandraSays

Yeah, I really can’t tell what he wants here. I mean he pretty much just walked in (metaphorically, b/c it’s online) and said I SHOULD BE VIOLENT IF I WANT TO WAAAH WOMEN DISRESPECT ME and then tried to back track around it and pretend what he was saying was just self defense.

The only possible thing I can think of is if his ego has taken corporeal form and diminishes a little bit every time someone doesn’t worship him.

chibigodzilla
11 years ago

Fine, I’ll bite the Brian Banks bait

The worst case that MRA’s can find of a false rape accusation is one where the accused was eventually exonerated, and has been signed to play in the NFL. Meanwhile, the accuser has been ordered to pay $2.6 million in damages.

This is not intended to minimize the fact that he spent 5+ years in jail, just that a) It hasn’t completely ruined his life like the MRAs like to bang on about and b) she is not getting away without any consequences.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

Greg – I should be able to hit women if they disrespect me!

Everyone – Dude, that’s not cool.

Greg – I see that you all love abusive women. Also, false rape accusations!

Everyone – Wait, what?

Greg – You will die alone with many cats. Also, Brian Banks.

Amnesia
Amnesia
11 years ago

@Marie
Okay, I set up a Flickr account, let’s see if that works…

My Artwork Described Earlier

Gotta go to work now!

Greg Wright
Greg Wright
11 years ago

@ Marie.

An abuser won’t stop until you teach him or her a lesson.

That goes for physical and emotional abusers.

Abusers only comprehend, physical violence, long term prison time, or having their child taken away by DCFS (my personal favorite).

katz
11 years ago

Amneeeeeesia! Join us on DeviantArt! JOIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNN UUUUUUUUUUSSSSSSSSSSS

katz
11 years ago

(Everyone who has been posting art should join us on Deviantart. We could totally start a MBZ group.)

pecunium
11 years ago

You people will be single for life.

I’ll be sure to tell my lovers that.

Because the flip side is that you aver women deserve to be hit, just because some man feels put upon.

Tell me, does a man deserve to be hit if he’s disrespectful?

If a woman slaps me, and I didn’t instigate being hit, I’m knocking her out. I don’t care what anyone thinks.

Not even the jury.

I’m not an abuser apologist.

I agree. You don’t apologise for it at all. You praise, encourage, and celebrate abuse.

Fade
Fade
11 years ago

@Amnesia.

I love your art. Especially the one with the person resting their head on the table with the glass. It cheered me up looking at it. 😀

And ah, what the hell, I guess I’ll indulge in some shameless self promotion:

My art’s:

How I envision sargent Fuery’s face in FMA

my version of revan from kotor

lust from FMA

… if you can’t tell, I draw mostly fan art. XD

inurashii
inurashii
11 years ago

An abuser won’t stop until you teach him or her a lesson.

Could you please link to the abuse resources that say this? No? Fuck you very much then.

I have seen no fewer than five of my friends through the tail end of abusive relationships in the past six months alone. I’ve read a LOT about abuse lately, and about how to deal with it. Stuff written by victims and professionals.

You have no idea what you’re talking about.

Also, talking about your ‘personal favorite’ way to deal with abusers, and it’s using children as a weapon? You’re disgusting.

Marie
11 years ago

@Amnesia

@Marie
Okay, I set up a Flickr account, let’s see if that works…

Yay! Thanks for sharing, those look totally wonderful 😀 I love your paint and how you do faces especially.

@Katz

I’m on DeviantArt! here: http://kitti47.deviantart.com/ Are you?

MANBOOBZ DEVIANT ART GROUP FOR THE WIN!

Now going to ignore the troll because he’s kind of repetative and I’d rather talk about art.

Fade
Fade
11 years ago

@ Katz

what’s your deviant art name? I shall join you!

Tell me, does a man deserve to be hit if he’s disrespectful?

I’m going to guess trolly will say yes, but that he thinks more things are disrespectful from women than from men (like “women not smiling at me on the elevators is spitting on me” guy I may have only heard about…)

katz
11 years ago

I can be found here

Marie
11 years ago

@fade

… if you can’t tell, I draw mostly fan art. XD

I draw almost exclusively fan art XD

Marie
11 years ago

@katz

Yay! ::goes to check out your deviant art page::

1 15 16 17 18 19 33